What age for makeup?


funkenheimer
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As a single dad with 2 brothers and no sisters there are certain topics that just never came up in our house. I have full custody of my 2 daughters, ages 12 and 10. My girls have never raised the issue and I don't plan on discussing it until they bring it up. But I want to have an answer at the ready when it does come up.

The questions is, at what age is it ok for girls to start wearing makeup? There is no specific doctrine that I am aware of. I welcome your opions.

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Makeup has nothing to do with doctrine whatsoever, so of course there aren't any statements on it.

As a big sister, I bought my younger sister a tube of tinted lip gloss for her 13th birthday. She's not a super girly-girl, and even at 22 years now, she doesn't wear a lot of makeup. I felt it was my duty as the older sister, though, to welcome her to teenagehood. I bought her one of these, which was a good, subtle intro to makeup.

I'd start with something like that. Chances are, they already wear chapstick or a non-tinted lipgloss. This would be familiar, and still hydrate the lips a little. After lipgloss, a light blush would be a good second piece of makeup. Beyond that, they'll want help from friends.

As for age, I don't really intend to introduce makeup to my own daughter any earlier than 13. If it were up to her father, I think it would be no earlier than 30. But don't push it at 13. Your idea of waiting until they bring it up is a good one. In my case, I'm almost eight years older than my sister, so it wasn't even a possibility for her to wear makeup when I started. With girls closer in age, like yours, the younger one may want to start when the older one does.

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I have a 13 yr old, she wears lip gloss. I let her know early on, that you are 16 for driving a car, and 16 when you wear make up. Allot of mothers will disagree with this, but my thoughts are this. I did not raise my daughter at 13 to look 16, and 16 to look 21, and so on....My daughter is a young woman, and its more important she stay a young virtues woman and a good role model, than popular top model at 13. Funny thing is, she ended up popular, and a good role model for several of the girls who look up to her. Who could ask for more :)

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I am familiar with your plight, I just started allowing my daughter to wear make-up. She turned 14 this summer. I let her start wearing it to her first dance at Youth Conference. ugh, it was hard...particularly for her daddy.

whatever your decision, make sure they know their make-up should stay in date...mascara especially because it can flake and get in the eyes.

It will take practice to get it right, and as for choice of colors...it would be best to say ,"I think this would look better on you!" rather than "that looks awful" Brown mascara/eyeliner for blondes, black is for brunettes. You can take them to a dept. store where they have consultants to show them how to apply everything. One of my friends does that for Stage, also Avon and Mary Kay ladies have parties, just to name a few.

Buy something to remove the make-up too, like facial wipes, they are easy to use and do not burn while you get the goop off the eyelashes.

Have Fun!

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I used to play dress up with my mom as a child and I played it with my younger sister. Dress up involved playing around with her old makeup and learning how to use it on myself. Though I played a lot with make up I never really became interested in using it until I was in about high school or so. Even then I didn't use a ton of it, and even now I don't use much makeup.

As a single father it will be difficult to play with makeup with your daughters. I second what Wingnut said about starting with small simple things like lipgloss and such and when they do show interest in makeup consider taking them to a mall or something for a make over of sorts. See if you can set up an instructional event for them where someone who works with makeup and has learned techniques of using makeup to enhance your looks can show them what to do. One of the best things my mother ever taught me about makeup is making it look like you don't have any on. Natural beauty is the best and there are ways to use makeup to enhance their natural beauty instead of covering it up. Making sure they are taught that will help them later on not only with their future makeup usage but also with their self confidence.

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wait and see if they want to before worrying about it, personally it never bothered me. I wore some occasionally when I was 15-20 (like once a month). I wore a little on my wedding day at 25 and that has been it in the past 14 years or so.

Don't see why it will be difficult for you I have three brothers all of which are more capable with makeup than I am. (they all had acne really bad as teens) My youngest is a hairdresser and beautician.

I personally don't see the point in it and I much prefer a natural face. Don't push something on them that is going to ruin their skin until they show an interest.

Make letting them know they are beautiful the priority - I have already told my daughter she is too beautiful for makeup:)

Edited by Elgama
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I agree with the others. In school, girls start wearing make up at a young age (IMO). I would say no earlier than 13 y/o. And at that point, just light makeup--lip gloss, facial powder (to get rid of the shine), some mascara. It's hard for girls to know how to apply things such as eye liner and eye shadow (what colors and technique). Taking them somewhere to have them show them is a great idea--one especially good for a birthday or some such "party" (be sure to get parental permission if she wants to bring friends along). Check at church--there might be a woman there who sells Mary Kay--they are great at coming to the home and showing how to apply.

And I DEFINTELY agree with whoever said to say "that color isn't right for you" rather than "you look awful!" Girls at that age are very sensitive, so encouraging them without belittling them is a fine line you shouldn't cross.

Good luck.

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The truth is that girls don't realize how beautiful they are without wearing make up ^_^

But if the issue comes up, I will suggest to take to a professional :hippie:

what I mean is you don't want them to wear a very red lipstick, and blue eye shadow if they are pale as paper :clown:, a simple beauty adviser would enlighten you and them on the proper way to hear and buy make up.

I hope it helps!! :bighug:

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I wore make-up when I was 5! Yeah, playing princess stuff. I would sneak into my mom's make-up kit and put it on. When my mom hid her make-up kit, I would wear white baby powder on my cheeks and stuff. I grew out of it at around 8 when I started being interested in sports - then I was a tomboy through high school and now that I'm an adult, I only wear very minimal on special occassions - I usually just put on chapstick for any other time.

If I had a daughter - I don't have one - I would let them decide if they want to wear make-up... BUT - I will have to teach them what make-up is about:

1.) You are pretty without make-up. Make-up is just decoration. Like wearing a necklace. Just because you are not wearing your necklace doesn't mean you don't look pretty. Yeah, you are pretty but if you wear yellow curdoroy pants with that purple t-shirt, it doesn't look good. Just like make-up - you are pretty but if you wear garrish thick black eyeliner with bright red lipstick at age 8 - it makes you look like one of them Japanese stage actors and not the cute little girl that you are.

2.) Make-up is not healthy for your skin. You have to take really good care of your skin if you decide to wear make-up. Most make-ups are carcinogens. It is easy to think your skin is healthy when the make-up is on because the make-up hides the skin surface. So, wearing make-up requires a lot of responsibility. Years of make-up wear without proper cleansing would end up giving you skin problems - clogged pores, wrinkles, dull skin, etc. (Look into :: Arbonne International :: or anything similar for relatively healthy make-up).

3.) There's nothing better than healthy, glowing skin to project a beautiful face. Less is best when using make-up.

4.) Everybody you see on fashion/celebrity magazines are fake. An illusion. They spend 4 hours of make-up sessions just to make them look pretty. So, sure, make-up made them look "celebrity" pretty, but what matters more is if they would look pretty without it.

Yeah, that's what I would say.

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i started shaving my legs when i was old enough to start dressing out for p.e.

make up was soon to follow.

i personally say some tinted lip gloss by 12. what's the fun in going to yw's if you can't even do that? by 14 some face powder, eye liner, and lipstick of some kind. don't need to fuss with blush or eyeshadow (which can be tricky for a lot of girls and make her look like a clown) or mascara till she is older and wants it. i was over 16 before i fussed with mascara. i still don't use blush. unless it's a special evet i still don't do anything but eyeliner, powder, and lipstick.

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Well of course, wait until they mention it. Or until you just see the signs (and you will). Heck with a 10 and 12 year old, you may be seeing it already! lol. You'll notice things like if you go somewhere like Wal-Mart, the girls will run off while you pick up some essentials. When you go to find them, they won't be in the toy isle like they used to be... Instead, they'll be in the "girlie" isles, looking at shoes, purses, clothes, testing perfumes and lip glosses... Little by little, they will start dropping more "girly" things into the shopping carts. It might be something small at first, like you will be in the store one day, and one of your girls will pick up some cherry-flavored chapstick, and ask you to buy it for her. Next time, she will ask for perfume. Then some slightly pinkish-tinted lip gloss... Then you'll hear complaints from your oldest girl that her little sister has been sneaking into her stuff and wearing her lip gloss, etc. (that's how it happened with me and my sister). It will move up from there.

As a woman, I will say-- its not as much about age (although I say at least past 12), as it is "how much" or "what kind" of makeup it is. I don't think any girl or woman should be so painted up that they look like a clown, or Elvira. I never had much in the way of pimples or wringkles (of course I just turned 29). But I've never worn much more than a little bit of mascara to darken the eyelashes (in a natural-looking way, not all cakey and clumpy), and a little bit of lip color. Once in a while, some cover-up but not much (don't really need it, and that's the stuff that really makes you wrinkle and look older if you use it too much, so I don't like to).

Make up is perfectly fine, just as long as its used in small amounts to enhance your natural beauty, and its not extreme or (again) cakey looking. But if I had to choose an age-- I would say as soon as pubery hits.

Nature will let you know when its time to start primping for boys, and looking pretty. Its about that time when your first "cycle" hits, when you get your first training bra (sorry, I'm not trying to be crude), or when you start to really notice the boys.

The other girls will give you a clue as well-- most of the girls in school I know start to test the makeup waters a bit when they see other girls in school shaving their legs and wearing little bits of makeup. For most of us, its starts around 12 or 13. We see the other girls start doing subtle things like wearing lip gloss. Or just a litttle bit of pressed powder. Sometimes very light eye shadow (like very pale pastel/baby colors that are barely detectable). Maybe grooming their eyebrows a little. A touch of mascara here and there. Over the next two 2 years, more obvious shades of blush, eye shadow, cover-up, colored lipstick, etc. will slowly start comming into the picture. Its a very gradual process.

In other words, its not "One day we don't wear it, and the next day we do." You let it develop step by step.

I say just let it happen naturally. And be reasonable-- tell them yes, they can wear makeup, as long as it looks fresh and clean. That way, you still have some parental say of the style of it, but they are allowed to wear it, like the other girls. And trust me, the other girls usually do a good job of keeping them in line. A girl will get teased in school if she cakes it on too thick, lol.

Edited by Melissa569
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children want to grow up so fast today, and its sad. make up is fun for girls most little girls like to play in it. dont stress out on being a single dad to a daughter just enjoy it. my dad had to tell me alot of things a mother ususally does and it was alright with me. fathers are very special to their daughters, its probably harder for the father then the daughter. lol..just love her and build up her self confidence and self worth let her know how important she is, just like u do with your sons. if she doesnt learn from you she will learn on the streets and you dont want that. theres always young woman leaders that help out and im sure any sister in the ward would help too. Keep it light keep it simple...

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Make up is perfectly fine, just as long as its used in small amounts to enhance your natural beauty, and its not extreme or (again) cakey looking. But if I had to choose an age-- I would say as soon as pubery hits.

That's far too ambiguous.

http://www.lds.net/forums/general-discussion/33931-more-girls-start-puberty-sooner-like-age-7-a.html

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I suppose I should clarify that-- for most average girls, when the body starts changing very noticably, as in their cycle hits, and and noticable visual changes start comming about, a serious interest in boys-- but deffinitely at least 12 or older. I know for some girls, the above things are happening eariler (I got my first menstrual cycle at 10 years old). But didnt' wear makeup till I was 13. I'm speaking in terms of when it happens for "most" others, and at least 95% or all of the other girls in the class have caught up together. For sure, 2-3 years into the double-digit ages. At least that would be my rule if I had a daughter, and it was the rule in our house growing up. :)

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When my daughter started wearing make-up she used way too much. She fought with her mother over the quantity of makeup she should use.

My solution was to visit the "high end" stores in all the malls in my area until I found what I was looking for. That was a young girl selling (quality) makeup who was attractive and fit my mental image of a young lady in terms of dress, deportment, makeup, etc. (In short somebody who would be a good role model for my daughter.)

I discussed what I wanted for my daughter with this young salesperson. I then bought a gift certificate that included lessons in applying makeup and gave it to my daughter.

It produced the desired results. My daughter learned how to properly apply makeup and stopped using too much. Cosmetics (especially "good ones") are expensive, but this turned out to money well spent (the fights stopped) and one of the wiser parental decisions I've made.

Edited by Daniel2020
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I was 13 when I was able to wear makeup. The idea was that by then I'd be able to do it more tastefully and not go out looking like a clown or something worse. We were allowed to play around with my moms makeup in the house before then, which was good practice, because it's not as easy as it looks.

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My mom always told me I had to be in high school to wear makeup (which seemed violently unfair to me since for my sisters hs was 9th grade and for me it was 10th.) Then for Christmas in 7th grade she put some makeup in my stocking and told me it was to play with not to wear to school. I ended up wearing makeup to school in 8th grade (13.) When I was a kid I was tall for my age and everyone thought I was 1-2 yrs older than I really was (before makeup was in the picture) and then by the time I was 18 everyone thought I was 16. Now I'm 37 and people think I'm anywhere from 27-30 but so far not older. I don't think makeup makes you look older but rather is a way to even out your skin tone, help hide blemishes (very important to a teenage girl!!!) and bring out eyes and cheek bones.

OP, I am not sure I would want to wait for my daughter to come to me...do you want her to wait until she's had sex before coming to you about it? I think if you are proactive...if even just to say it's OK for them to talk to you about makeup, boys or whatever, then you are opening the door for them to communicate with you. If you wait for them to bring it up, they might think it's a taboo topic. Don't force them to talk about something, but do bring it up and let them decide whether to continue the conversation. At some point (if not already) they're going to need you to buy feminine products and makeup is a much easier topic to broach than that!

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OP, I am not sure I would want to wait for my daughter to come to me...do you want her to wait until she's had sex before coming to you about it?

If you are going to use a emotive analogy at least use a correct one. How about, "Do you want to wait for her to come to you before talking about sex?"?

Though I suppose this could be a fun game:

Person A: I think I'm going to give my son permission to get his license.

Person B: Would you give your son permission to engage in premarital sex or use drugs?

Edited by Dravin
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Your reply made absolutely no sense. Why are you attacking me anyway? Do I know you? Or did I just strike a cord with you...you know I'm right and you can't stand it? Very strange. I thought this forum was for giving advice.The OP asked a question in the advice forum and I gave my advice based on my experiences as a woman. If you don't like it, move on to the next posting but there's no reason to be catty and start attacking because someone gave advice that is different from yours. Leave the women's topics to the women!!

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you know I'm right and you can't stand it?

Ah yes, if someone disagrees with you it must be because the obvious rightness of all that is you makes them want to tear you down. Can't be that they simply disagree with you, no, that wouldn't require enough hubris as an explanation.

Very strange. I thought this forum was for giving advice.

Yep and I gave you some advice, pick a better analogy. Just a helpful hint for future reference, just because this forum is for giving advice does not mean you will not have your advice commented on or that it is otherwise sacrosanct. In fact that applies to the whole board, by posting your thoughts on a public forum you open them up to public scrutiny.

If you don't like it, move on to the next posting but there's no reason to be catty and start attacking because someone gave advice that is different from yours.

I didn't attack you or your advice, if I attacked anything I attacked your analogy.

Leave the women's topics to the women!!

I was unaware that poor analogies was a women's topic.

Edited by Dravin
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Getting back to the topic of cosmetics....

Teach good skin care early. Wash your face daily, wear sunscreen, use chap stick, etc... because its good to take care of your body and keep it healthy.

When she asks about all that other gunk... Google the risks and ethics of various products. Tell her to avoid products that used animal testing, warn her that eye makeup can increase her risk of pink eye, many foundations can clog pores and damage skin... then remind her that real beauty comes from within but you believe in free agency and trust her judgment. If she makes some mistakes and starts getting picked on... or just wants some help or advice then its time to consult a professional. A high end makeup counter is expensive but will carry a lot of weight in the mind of a young girl. A Mary Kay consultant is much less expensive and gives you both the chance to support small business and possibly provides a good role model.

Good Luck

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OP, I am not sure I would want to wait for my daughter to come to me...do you want her to wait until she's had sex before coming to you about it?

Hardly comparable.

If you don't like it, move on to the next posting but there's no reason to be catty and start attacking because someone gave advice that is different from yours.

:lol:

Leave the women's topics to the women!!

You mean the question that's being asked by a man?

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