New TLC program: "Sister Wives"

[PrinceofLight2000]

Is that a nod to SSM?:p.

Doubtful. Looks like they just chose to use "he" instead of "he/she"

[Carl62]

That could almost (almost--but not quite) be an argument for living in Utah. "Sorry, mother-in-law, it's against the law for you to live with us."

Now THAT'S a law I would uphold! (anyway they can make a law even against visiting).

[Just_A_Guy]

MOE, I'm not sure. I know there was a high-profile challenge to the statute on religious freedom grounds in 2004 that the state Supreme Court shot down. The best info on the topic that I can find via Google seems to come from (perish the thought!) the ACLU, and it looks like the "cohabitation" prong has never been challenged.

Utah's antibigamy statute is kind of a quirky thing, because the Congressional enabling act allowing Utah to set itself up as a state requires the state to ban polygamy--which Utah does both by statute and by its constitution (the latter bans polygamy "forever", which begs the question of whether a legislative body can prohibit future sessions of that body from amending the statutes it passes). As a theoretical exercise, I've heard some people argue that if Utah ever legalized polygamy the Congressional enabling act would become void and Utah would revert back to territorial status. [i doubt that would happen in real life, but it's fun to speculate about.]

Edited September 30, 2010 by Just_A_Guy

[Just_A_Guy]

That could almost (almost--but not quite) be an argument for living in Utah. "Sorry, mother-in-law, it's against the law for you to live with us."

FWIW, the term "cohabit" usually entails a sexual relationship.

[i won't tell your mother-in-law if you won't.]

[Good gravy, there's an unpleasant thought. ]

[Moksha]

I've heard some people argue that if Utah ever legalized polygamy the Congressional enabling act would become void and Utah would revert back to territorial status.

Possibly even reverting back to the Kingdom of Deseret, which existed prior to territorial formation?

[havejoy]

I watched the episode and the thing that really struck me was the laissez-faire attitude they seem to have about their religion. They actually said that they supported whatever their children wanted for themselves, whether that was polygamy or no religion at all...

It just makes me think that they are just using the religion as an excuse.

I'd just like to say that this is PinkPanther, Not Havejoy.... my mom never signed out of her account and I didn't realize until I posted.

Edited October 1, 2010 by havejoy
Signed in to Mom's account.

[Soulsearcher]

I watched the episode and the thing that really struck me was the laissez-faire attitude they seem to have about their religion. They actually said that they supported whatever their children wanted for themselves, whether that was polygamy or no religion at all...

It just makes me think that they are just using the religion as an excuse.

Heaven help a parent that supports their children even if they aren't carbon copies of their parents, what is this world coming to, shame on those parents, shame

[PinkPanther]

Heaven help a parent that supports their children even if they aren't carbon copies of their parents, what is this world coming to, shame on those parents, shame

I'm not saying that they have to be carbon copies. What I'm saying is that it's surprising to me that if you really fully love and embrace your religion, you would want your kids to have that same joy and teach (not brainwash) them the tenants of your faith.

I don't know, it just seems strange to me.

I could be wrong, I don't know them personally and only an edited version.

[Dravin]

I think the context does matter a lot.

This:

"Well, if they want to do they're own thing. Whatever, that's cool."

Tends to send an impression you don't care much about what direction they go.

Where as:

"I'll support my children regardless of the religious decisions they may make in life. No matter what they believe I'll love them."

Tends to invoke the thought of the loving parent who won't disown their children for breaking from the faith. I suppose it's the difference between understanding and appearing lackadaisical/laid back about the whole affair.

But as I said, context is key. And context includes just what kinda people they are, some folks would comment on their house burning down with a, "Yep, a fire. Crap happens, what can ya do?"

[Soulsearcher]

I'm not saying that they have to be carbon copies. What I'm saying is that it's surprising to me that if you really fully love and embrace your religion, you would want your kids to have that same joy and teach (not brainwash) them the tenants of your faith.

I don't know, it just seems strange to me.

I could be wrong, I don't know them personally and only an edited version.

But what they said was they would support their children taking what ever path they took, didn't see you mention that they refused to teach the faith, just would accept if their children took another path. very different situations.

[Moksha]

I watched the episode and the thing that really struck me was the laissez-faire attitude they seem to have about their religion. They actually said that they supported whatever their children wanted for themselves, whether that was polygamy or no religion at all...

Excellent observation. Those other real life polygamists who have ever spoken on camera, have portrayed themselves and their beliefs as not only wacky but wacky in a neurotic way. The Brown family has portrayed themselves as normal and fairly wholesome people. No child brides or lost boys to be found at their house. They seem like they would make good neighbors with none of the worry that they would be burning sacrificial goats on their backyard altar.

[Dravin]

Excellent observation. Those other real life polygamists who have ever spoken on camera, have portrayed themselves and their beliefs as not only wacky but wacky in a neurotic way. The Brown family has portrayed themselves as normal and fairly wholesome people. No child brides or lost boys to be found at their house. They seem like they would make good neighbors with none of the worry that they would be burning sacrificial goats on their backyard altar.

I've never had goat, BBQ goat could be a plus.

[Moksha]

I've never had goat, BBQ goat could be a plus.

That would probably be good goat.

[Guest mirancs8]

I watched the show and thought it was really good. It's great to see a plural family that lives their day to day lives normally like us. They are making it work. The wives seem content and they each love him in their own way. I give him credit because it's hard enough for a man to be married to one women... can you imagine 3 or 4! I'm sure men don't even realize this but when women live together they cycle the same time! 3 wives on a PMS emotional roller coaster... can you imagine! I'm sure they have their challenges like any family, but I would imagine they work at it together to bring that harmony.

We've seen so much of the FLDS on TV with their isolation, lost boys, child abuse, and dress that society has only that image in their minds. Many are not aware that there are thousands of families that live plural marriage and may live in a neighborhood near you. I find it humorous when people would get their panties in a bunch about the story line in Big Love but in fact there are families like this... OK not that dramatic but it's realistic.

I hope this show will do a great deal to help people who watch it see that plural marriage doesn't necessarily equal FLDS/Jeffs etc. They should decriminalize it so these families aren't living in fear. I can't imagine the stress they are under. Sometimes you see these documentaries of Plural families (like in Centennial Park AZ) and the husband is terrified he'll lose business if on TV. Concerning the Brown's I can't imagine the law would actually do something... I don't think they want a repeat of the late 1800's. Though not the same magnitude, we all saw in TX how it hit such a nerve even to those who do not believe in the practice.

Plural marriage never was an issue in my mind. As long as there is no fraud and child abuse it's not any of my business. If my husband received revelation to practice plural marriage I wouldn't immediately pass out or have a fit. It would certainly put a jolt in our day to day lives. I'd be on my knees for a long time to HF praying. The jealously would be a challenge... that's why I elect to not be 2nd wife! 1st, 3rd, 4th anything but 2nd. 2nd is like Nickie on Big Love... cranky, misunderstood, defending herself constantly, and always feeling like the black sheep of the family. She will always be knows as the one who disrupted the family. I can imagine that for these families the wives become truly sisters to each other. I can't imagine how else it could work. You would have to love them as your sisters.

[PrinceofLight2000]

I watched the show and thought it was really good. It's great to see a plural family that lives their day to day lives normally like us. They are making it work. The wives seem content and they each love him in their own way. I give him credit because it's hard enough for a man to be married to one women... can you imagine 3 or 4! I'm sure men don't even realize this but when women live together they cycle the same time! 3 wives on a PMS emotional roller coaster... can you imagine! I'm sure they have their challenges like any family, but I would imagine they work at it together to bring that harmony.

We've seen so much of the FLDS on TV with their isolation, lost boys, child abuse, and dress that society has only that image in their minds. Many are not aware that there are thousands of families that live plural marriage and may live in a neighborhood near you. I find it humorous when people would get their panties in a bunch about the story line in Big Love but in fact there are families like this... OK not that dramatic but it's realistic.

I hope this show will do a great deal to help people who watch it see that plural marriage doesn't necessarily equal FLDS/Jeffs etc. They should decriminalize it so these families aren't living in fear. I can't imagine the stress they are under. Sometimes you see these documentaries of Plural families (like in Centennial Park AZ) and the husband is terrified he'll lose business if on TV. Concerning the Brown's I can't imagine the law would actually do something... I don't think they want a repeat of the late 1800's. Though not the same magnitude, we all saw in TX how it hit such a nerve even to those who do not believe in the practice.

Plural marriage never was an issue in my mind. As long as there is no fraud and child abuse it's not any of my business. If my husband received revelation to practice plural marriage I wouldn't immediately pass out or have a fit. It would certainly put a jolt in our day to day lives. I'd be on my knees for a long time to HF praying. The jealously would be a challenge... that's why I elect to not be 2nd wife! 1st, 3rd, 4th anything but 2nd. 2nd is like Nickie on Big Love... cranky, misunderstood, defending herself constantly, and always feeling like the black sheep of the family. She will always be knows as the one who disrupted the family. I can imagine that for these families the wives become truly sisters to each other. I can't imagine how else it could work. You would have to love them as your sisters.

Even though it's a sin to practice it currently?

[Guest mirancs8]

It's a hypothetical statement. I'm not saying I'd actually do it. I'm just expressing my opinion in general of what I think about it while adding a wee bit of humor.

Relax it's all good.

[Saguaro]

I thought this article was pretty good, it gives a good background history on plural marriage in the church and how the fundamentalists evolved.

"Sister Wives" explained: A fundamentalist Mormon polygamy primer – CNN Belief Blog - CNN.com Blogs

[Blackmarch]

I was curious what this show was, so I checked out the preview on YouTube, here:

Hmmmm.... Well, if you live in a country where half of the men have been killed off, and your choices are either get married or starve--- then I suppose I can see why someone would agree to be one of multiple wives. Of course, that still doesn't mean its right, or ideal... Its just survival.

And to be honest, even in that case, I'm sorry but I would rather become a nun and live in a convent (almost every culture has something similar to that, religiously) than participate in a multiple marriage.

But as for the USA... If there are plenty of men to go around, and such a lifestyle is not the norm of your culture, then there is no need to live such a lifestyle. I firmly believe that if you allow yourself to be sucked into it when there is no survival need to do so, it is because you have somehow been convinced that YOU don't deserve a faithful husband, but your husband deserves faithful wives.

I mean really, if he truly believes that multiple marriages are ok, then how come his wives can't have multiple husbands? I'll tell you why-- Its because he thinks he is more worthy of being content than women are.

And any man who believes that, is not decent. Nor is he worthy of a good woman's love.

It's simple for me-

If God says do it, then do it. If God says not to, then don't.

About the only other thing I would consider in the equation is getting the first's spouse permission and input.

Altho I do like Mark twain's response to the question of polygamy;

"No man can serve two masters." ^.^

[cathyyg]

I rather liked the episode of "Sister Wives" I watched. I really think this issue is going to be addressed at the Federal level in the US soon. You see, it's a issue for Muslims in the US as well as fundamentalist Mormons. Muslims are allowed up to 4 wives. I don't know how this would go if addressed as a religious-rights issue in front of the US Supreme Court. But now bigamy laws are affecting the practice of more than one religion.

[Suzie]

I have seen the show. Personally, the wives (the first three) do not look "content" as expressed here. I even think they were/are jealous of the last one and they even joke about calling her a "trophy" wife because she is slim, etc.

[MuggleMormon]

I've only watched the episodes where the 4th lady was introduced and then when they all moved her to a new house down the street from the "Big House" (no pun intended). I had a hard time watching the show and kept shaking my head. Been a lifelong member of The Church and am kinda surprised how negatively I reacted to the show considering the following: my mom has passed away and my dad has remarried to a lovely, warm, and wonderful lady. My step-mom and my dad were sealed in the temple (it's her first marriage) and my siblings (all lifelong members) are not happy about this one bit. Furious would be a better word. I'm totally ok with it and even think my mom had a hand in finding my dad a new companion here since he's probably going to live for decades more. She always took good care of my dad and would want him to be happy and well taken care of.

K. Second reason. I'm divorced from the father of my kids and he has recently remarried and been sealed to his second wife. I had to give permission for them to be sealed as we did not get a dissolution of sealing (everyone agrees that since I'm not remarried in the Temple and am the mother of his children, I still have that right to be "taken care of". I really like my ex's new wife and so do my kids.

I think one reason I felt almost "disgusted" by watching the family on Sister Wives is that they all seemed so happy and so much in love, touchy-feely happy, and that they all lived in the same house. Just feels ick to me.

I can totally see the reason polygamy was practiced in the early days of the Church and is practiced in other, less "affluent" (for lack of a better word all the sudden) parts of the world. But like one poster before me said -- here in America in these days??? -- I just don't get it. There is no need.

This Kody guy has mistresses living in the same house with his wife. That's how I felt while watching, and was just totally turned off.

I'd like to watch the show some more to see if my feelings change.

Lastly, I have a feeling that the three women who have to share a house will get jealous real quick of the new wife who gets a nice house all to herself. Could be wrong there, but that's my prediction.

[yorkiebeebs]

I can totally see the reason polygamy was practiced in the early days of the Church and is practiced in other, less "affluent" (for lack of a better word all the sudden) parts of the world. But like one poster before me said -- here in America in these days??? -- I just don't get it. There is no need.

I guess I'm naive but I don't understand the necessity for a plural marriage. Taking on the financial responsibility of another family doesn't mean you have to marry them.

I guess I will probably never understand so I should save my energy for more important things to think about.

When all is said and done, God is in control and is the judge and we will all find out eventually how he feels about these things.

[Wingnut]

I can totally see the reason polygamy was practiced in the early days of the Church and is practiced in other, less "affluent" (for lack of a better word all the sudden) parts of the world. But like one poster before me said -- here in America in these days??? -- I just don't get it. There is no need.

You mean in areas of the world that believe in a religion that supports polygamy?

[ADoyle90815]

I have to admit that I watched that show, it's like a wreck, you can't help but look.