Two girls, one choice


RalphTheMouth
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Also some wise words of advise. This online dating can sure be fun isn't it. All the stimulation coming at you from all directions. It's a great way to meet/date many people in a short period of time. If you end up really in love with one of these girls I recommend you both take turns visiting each other. Take you time. Simple writing/talking on the phone isn't enough. It's only the beginning. The one thing with online dating is you get a false notion you know someone when you really don't. Take time knowing her face to face when you can. As it get's more serious meet each others friends and family members. Time will be your greatest friend in this type of dating situation.

Distance doesn't matter if you are really meant for each other. You can make that part work easily. You do however have to take the time to really get to know each other... the good as well as the bad. She's not always going to be in her best light, neither will you.

Thanks for the wise words, I think I was jumping the gun and expecting because we talk a lot that there were certain expectations like when face to face dating. Turns out I was wrong and we're not as serious as I thought. However, we are as Gwen said, "Friends with Potential".

Again, thanks for the advice.

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I assume the visits will be for a week or a long weekend -- something like that? Do you really honestly believe that you will fall in lover in 3 days' time?

I don't believe I'll fall in love, but I want to feel free to BEGIN to fall in love. I've never been in a situation where I didn't feel free to take a relationship to wherever it was headed. That's mostly because I've only dating one girl at a time. Now I feel stuck; like I can't just let things happen. I really hate being stuck, so I guess want I was hoping was to figure out how to "jump the gun", skip the months of getting to know them before I end up with one of them. I guess that's just part of the game of love, eh?

I don't have an opinion one way or the other on telling or not telling the girls, but you should consider that they will each be paying quite a bit of money to fly to wherever you are.

Of course, I want to be completely honest with them and make sure the expectations are clear.

Thank you for your thoughts on this subject. :)

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not saying it applies here but something to think on.

in the book "his needs her needs" it talks about how affairs happen. something that is brought out that i found interesting and a bit surprising is how men and women love. (my summery won't be doing it any justice lol) he says women tend to love one man. men on the other hand can be in love with more than one woman. each woman meets different needs and makes him feel good for different reasons. between the two of them he is filled. he really is in love with both and thinks he needs both of them to be happy.

understanding that some things to consider. the choice may not get easier as you get to know them in person. it may actually get harder. also lets say you make a choice, no ill feelings happened with the other you just make a choice. 5 yrs down the road the marriage gets hard (marriage is work it will get hard). will you find yourself wondering "what if? did i make the wrong choice?" could create a dangerous situation. the odds that you may ask those questions without things starting like this may still be there but i would imagine this kind of situation would greatly increase those odds and complicate things.

no matter who you end up with, one of these girls or someone else, make sure you've developed the relationship well enough that when things get hard and you start questioning a lot "what if?" can be taken off the list of questions.

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As a guy, I have some advice:

Man up and go meet one. Can't decide which to go for first? You clearly don't care for either of them enough. You're in 'Mancrazy mode'. Mancrazy mode is when a guy can't make a decision on a woman because he's afraid something better will come along and doesn't want to tie himself down, but is also terrified of losing said woman.

Don't tell them you're in an open relationship, as you have never met them.

Don't think you're in mancrazy mode? Then go meet one. If you don't want to because you're afraid you might choose the wrong one and the -other- might be better for you but you might never know because you visited the other first and got in to a relationship, then you're in mancrazy mode.

The cure for mancrazy mode is to man up and take a chance.

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So true. When we go as a family to cut down our Christmas tree and we commit to one and cut it down, I tell them, "Don't look at the other trees now!" Because no matter what, you'll probably see another one that might have been better. :lol:

And I can't seem to think of Interent dating without picturing Kip and Lafawnda. Ralph, do you sit at your computer writing poetry? Do you love technology? :P

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Guest mirancs8

So true. When we go as a family to cut down our Christmas tree and we commit to one and cut it down, I tell them, "Don't look at the other trees now!" Because no matter what, you'll probably see another one that might have been better. :lol:

Where's that Laughing button when you need it!!!

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That's fine with me, I looked at your profile and find you have a SON!! You never told me that! :mad:

Thank you for the minor heart attack. :D

Oh no you did-UNT! Got a problem with the kiddo?!?! That's not what you said in your E-Harm-Lds-Minglicious-Singlepalooza dating site profile! It said you loved kids, golden retrievers and movies that make you cry! <_< But whatever! My boyfriend #'s 1-3 and 5-8 are all fine with the fact that I have a son so I'm not so upset about losing you (#4). I'm SO done!

(if by chance you realize how much of a mistake this is and want me back my # is 801-240-2391)

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