Not sure about church anymore


Guest fridderz
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Guest BarcodeIIIlll

Things have got a little hard recently, with my mother hating the fact im a mormon, and i took my sister to church (who lives with my mum, she stayed up for 2 weeks and she came to church and enjoyed it, when she went back she said, mum, what do you think about me being mormon, and she replied "i would hate it, dont you do that") Luckily my dad signed my baptism forms.

My so called best friend took the mic out of me, telling everyone, Oh guess what! (me) has gone all religious! and everyone laughs at me :(

People have been insulting me online, over the net. and I think i've accidently came across the sacred things which you learn at the temple. im not endowed.

I feel there is no hope left in me, i've fallen back to the old person i used to be, swearing, talking innappropriatly. But I still dont drink tea ect. but I know the way i am im not temple worthy. I feel I should ask to be released from my calling and not go anymore

I've lost my testimony in jesus christ

I dont read my scriptures anymore

I dont do my seminary

I just cant be botherd to pray.

I dont feel the spirit anymore.

My family arnt members, so its hard for me at home. Like, i have to invite the spirit in, without help of family.

I need a bit of guidence, any help anyone?

Thanks,

Barcode

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You inspire me. You have done and are doing so well with what little support you have at home and apparently amongst friends. I have family that are active LDS and yet I could never be bothered. I don't know all the details of your situation but keep doing what you're doing. It's hard being the odd man/woman out sometimes but you're on the right track! Don't abandon it now. Pray with a sincere and humble heart — the Lord will guide you.

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There is a saying or a quote.."I never said it would be easy, only that it would be worth it."

You have a marvelous opportunity to let your light shine in spite of your friends. Honestly, a true friend wouldn't do what you state they are doing.

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Guest BarcodeIIIlll

There is a saying or a quote.."I never said it would be easy, only that it would be worth it."

You have a marvelous opportunity to let your light shine in spite of your friends. Honestly, a true friend wouldn't do what you state they are doing.

I know, but this 'true friend' who i thought she was... Her mum who i thought was nice was saying, "oh those mormons practise polygamy" "and watch out, they'll brain wash you"

And she wont listen to me..... I just dont have the testimony anymore, its been sucked out of me. Without a testimony, theres no desire to goto church :(

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Guest mormonmusic

I hear you. I was the first (and only) person to join the Church in a non-member family. They reacted in a similar way -- and my friends called me a "religious nut". That I "went overboard" etcetera.

Like the others -- I admire you for taking these steps in spite of the lack of family and friend support. It shows what a good heart and good character you have.

I wouldn't let this setback motivate you to throw out all the good things you're doing. The way to strengthen your testimony is to keep doing the very things you're considering not doing.

Also, recognize that it won't be this way forever -- I am quite a few years older than you now, but I joined at a young age, and felt similar things about being alone and not supported in the gospel. My sister and my brother both rejected the gospel, and my parents became anti-Mormons.

But I created my own family and I'm surrounded by a lot of family members that I married into, plus my own kids and my wife who are all active members.

So, keep lighting your own fire and let it lighten the path ahead of you. Eventually you'll be surrounded by others that have the same values within your own family as you keep prodding forward.

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Let's put this in the most likely order of things

I just cant be botherd to pray.

I dont read my scriptures anymore

I dont do my seminary

Thus

I dont feel the spirit anymore.

I've lost my testimony in jesus christ

I've always been under the opinion that if a person want's to be active, they have to do it first before I go chasing after them. The formula is very, very simple: start reading your scriptures daily, pray twice daily, attend church. Then you will feel it all come back to you. If you're concerned about what people think of you, well, as we say, Christ was the ultimate example of this. There are plenty of stories of people giving up families, work, etc because of their belief in the church.

Go read Lehi's account of the Tree of Life and Nephi's explanation of it and decide where you are and where you want to be. Be honest with yourself on if you truly want to give up whatever you need to for the sake of the Gospel. Then be ready to deal with the consequences, either good or bad, of your decision.

It's so easy to say we will die for something. But to say we'll live for a cause, that's hard.

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My advice: hang in there a little longer. I actually joined this forum because I was going through something similar. The forums were not major in helping me get on the right track again, but it was inspirational and did help me in the right direction. I had to do some serious prayer and pondering, and I advise you to do that. Don't end all of it just because of a hard time. Don't "Well, today I don't feel like I have a testimony so I'll walk out of the church forever". Hang in there, take some time to really think about what you believe, and who knows what will happen? I think a little doubt and trials are good for spiritual growth.

Here's a story from a friend of mine. She was the only LDS person in her family and circle of friends. She did get some crap from it, but when she talked about just forgetting all of it, these very people that weren't happy with her beliefs asked her if she really cared more about their opinions than her own. They might not have liked Mormonism, and they shouldn't have been telling her what they did, but when it came right down to it they did respect her choice.

Do what slamjet suggested. Do the things you are supposed to be doing. Fake it until you make it. Use this time to really consider what you believe and feel.

Best of luck to you.

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Hi Barcode,

A lot of us go through the same thing you are going through. You won't believe how many people automatically say, "How many wives does your husband have?" when they find out I'm Mormon.

It doesn't bother me anymore. It shouldn't bother you either. Because, if you asked to be baptized when none of your family are LDS, that means that your testimony of Jesus Christ is something you got straight from the Holy Ghost and not from your parents.

Therefore, your testimony of Jesus Christ do not hinge on whether your parents/friends agree with you or not.

Jesus Christ is the Son of God. He is the Savior of mankind. Through Him we can be saved.

This remains true regardless of how people treat you. Take up the cross and follow Him. We'll be here to help you carry it so that together, our burdens may become light.

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Guest BarcodeIIIlll

Hi Barcode,

A lot of us go through the same thing you are going through. You won't believe how many people automatically say, "How many wives does your husband have?" when they find out I'm Mormon.

It doesn't bother me anymore. It shouldn't bother you either. Because, if you asked to be baptized when none of your family are LDS, that means that your testimony of Jesus Christ is something you got straight from the Holy Ghost and not from your parents.

Therefore, your testimony of Jesus Christ do not hinge on whether your parents/friends agree with you or not.

Jesus Christ is the Son of God. He is the Savior of mankind. Through Him we can be saved.

This remains true regardless of how people treat you. Take up the cross and follow Him. We'll be here to help you carry it so that together, our burdens may become light.

I understand what you mean, however, I have been bullied throughout my life, and by the time everyone at my school stops and grows up, It starts again when I came a member of this church, And im absolutly sick of it. Church meant alot to me at the beggining of this school year, and it really hurt what people said,

Now all my testimony of the church is gone, I dont beleive joseph smith was visited by god and christ. Everything is gone. It's not that I cant be bothered full stop, its that i cant be bothered because I dont believe anymore. :(

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I understand what you mean, however, I have been bullied throughout my life, and by the time everyone at my school stops and grows up, It starts again when I came a member of this church, And im absolutly sick of it. Church meant alot to me at the beggining of this school year, and it really hurt what people said,

Now all my testimony of the church is gone, I dont beleive joseph smith was visited by god and christ. Everything is gone. It's not that I cant be bothered full stop, its that i cant be bothered because I dont believe anymore. :(

Not believing anymore is an entirely different ball game than not being bothered. If you honestly don't believe anymore, there's nothing we can really say that will change your mind. Faith and testimony are things one must discover and nurture on their own. If you were to say you got into some trouble (including your patience being tested) and could no longer be bothered, then we could encourage you to continue praying and attending church. But once you say you don't believe (and there's no desire), then you don't believe and there's no desire.
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So I'm not sure what you would like us to say to you?

All I can say is..it's all true. Joseph Smith was visited by Christ and Heavenly Father. He did restore the church in these latter days. He was a true Prophet of God.

I firmly believe this and have never doubted nor has my testimony of it ever wavered.

But you have to discover this again for yourself if that is your desire. If in fact you have just given up..then there really is nothing that we can say except wish you the best in whatever direction your life takes you.

Edited by pam
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Barcode, I hear what you are saying, but if everything was gone you would not be on here asking for advice.

I agree with the others. You are the only one that can decide what you are willing to do. We can tell you what we believe to be true. We can feel your hurt because many of us have and still live with the same problem. We can tell you our stories of disappointment in relationships. The truth is that it is not easy to live our faith. We have to make changes. Some easy, but most are very hard to do. Sometimes when we move on we leave people behind. We can still care about them, but remember agency goes both ways. They have a choice also. This choice may not agree with your choice.

Every day is a choice. I have a choice to live the way my Heavenly Father wants me to. I like Pam's quote. Not easy but true, and my feelings is that it will be true even if I fail to live it.

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I understand what you mean, however, I have been bullied throughout my life, and by the time everyone at my school stops and grows up, It starts again when I came a member of this church, And im absolutly sick of it. Church meant alot to me at the beggining of this school year, and it really hurt what people said,

Now all my testimony of the church is gone, I dont beleive joseph smith was visited by god and christ. Everything is gone. It's not that I cant be bothered full stop, its that i cant be bothered because I dont believe anymore. :(

I guess I don't see what you're saying here. I'm getting the impression you're saying you don't believe anymore because all these bad things are happening to you.

If that's correct, I have to be honest: It's a little silly. You either believe something or you don't. Whether or not something is real has nothing to do with emotional states or reactions of others or yourself. You can't just believe in something when it's convenient or feels good.

If you just don't believe anymore, there's nothing any of us here can really do. If you're having doubts and difficulties because of these negative things in your life, then I think a lot of good advice has been given.

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I was baptized when I was 16. There were a few times when my Mom told me to choose between her and the Church. So, I know how you feel.

The thing to do is set the example for your family. You do what you know is right, and let the Lord handle the things outside of your control. If you aren't feeling the Spirit, it is because you've stopped doing the key essentials: pray, scripture study, attending Church and seminary, etc. Go back to doing these things, and within a few weeks, you'll find the Spirit will be with you again, bringing you more hope and peace. This doesn't mean you won't have tough times. You will. But you will have tough times in life with OR without the Church in your life. The difference is whether you will have the comforting strength of the Holy Ghost to help you through those trials or not.

Show your Mom extra Christ-like love. Show her by example that it is a good thing for you to be a Mormon. If you are eager to help her, show her loving kindness, and appreciate her, over time she'll notice and her heart will be softened towards your activity in the Church.

After my mission, my parents and many of the brothers and sisters became interested in the Church, and are now active members. I believe that my good example prepared the way for the rest of them. I had to remain faithful and patient for 6 or 7 years this way. However, before I reached 9 years in the Church as a member, I was sealed to my parents in the temple. None of this would have happened if I would have quit years before because of the teasing and attacks I received from family and friends for joining the Church.

Now, 35 years later, I have raised my own kids in the gospel and all are active. And I have grandchildren who are being raised in the Church, as well. Looking back, I'm very glad I endured the trials of my youth in joining the Church and being baptized. Today still has struggles and trials, but the blessings are ever more evident.

So, get back to doing the key things: prayer, scripture study, attending seminary and Church. When you do those things, the Lord will begin to bless you and bring you peace and joy.

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Guest BarcodeIIIlll

I see what you all mean, Its just, I want that desire to beleive again, so there is part of me that wants to be active (i am active because im trying) And i do want to do what Rameumptom did, apart serve a mission, until im elderly. I kow my family wont join, but i still have the passion and i want to marry LDS and raise my childeren in the church. part of its still there, i guess i just need to keep looking to find that spirit again for myself.

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I suggest that you get some great uplifting spiritual music and listen to it.

With words- like Mormon Tab choir is good, but even just the hymns without words can help.

also get out to nature, and let yourself de stress. Get alone (from people) but God is there and we are never alone.

You say "everything is gone" but actually I think you are just feeling lost in a dense fog-- or darkness,

and without reaching OUT for the good things you felt before, you don't feel them now.

The trials in our life are to help us grow stronger (think of even weight lifting- it builds muscles)

If you like to read, you could read some good books.

One part of the Narnia Chronicled has the kids in the clutches of the Green Lady, who causes them to no longer feel what is right, or remember much of the sun- but Puddlegum says- out of the deep depression-- something to the effect- that even if there IS no sun- still he would WANT to believe and would be happier TO believe that there was one, and THAT wanting to have hope saves them.

--- The fact that you are on here says you long for what you had-- and probably still have but it is just covered in the fog.

You can be forgiven for everything (well maybe except blasphemy against the holy ghost-- but you have not received enough light to qualify for that ;) so don't worry.

--- Satan WANTS you to give up, and feel it is lost and no use, that you aren't worthy

(all the things HE feels and HAS lost and can't get back!) You have a life, you have choices, you HAVE been baptized, and you have great potential that he wants to destroy!

In the twilight book series- (if I remember right) one talent a vampire had was tracking- and he can turn it around and AVOID the person he needs to avoid by going opposite of the way he would if he was tracking them.

Satan is who we need to avoid- and anything he wants us to do-- like

leave the church, swear, feel unworthy etc) --- then we can be "oppositional defiant" to Satan!

Get good music, get around some GOOD friends, tell your bishop you need help, or any priesthood over you, get a priesthood blessing. Even if YOU feel you don't have faith, THEIRS can help you, if only you have the desire! like the bible said the father said when told he needed faith for his child to be healed-- "Lord I have faith, ---Help thou my unbelief!"

You CAN do this, or you wouldn't be faced with this challenge to need to do it!

You must actually be MUCH stronger than you think to even HAVE been given such a challenge.

Depression is the total pits to deal with.

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Oh, like I told another

there is a free site to help with thinking/attitudes that are hurting us

"The Work" by Byron Katie

it is fast and it can help

and they have short videos of others using it so you get a clue!

"We can do what must be done".

There is always some choice-- and so look harder if you don't see any!

congratulations on asking for advice!

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beofre i start. i'd just like to say well done, not enough people ask for help when a problem like this comes to surface.

i am in a similar situation, friends don't like the new me, my parents don't hate me for it, but i can tell they look at me differently, in a less favored light. there are days when i think, why did i do this, i've forgotten, but the second i look around me, i'm reminded. the world is full of negativity, unfortunately lucifer has had an impact on us and wherever we look we see him. put your faith and trust in God and Jesus and you'll never look back.

my advice would be to continue praying for guidance, try and make some effort in your scriptures, perhaps revisit some read passages that you remember feeling the spirit when you studied.

talk to you bishop and he'll embrace you with the warmth and love you seem to be searching for

hang in there, you'll be okay :)

PM me if you wish to talk further :)

Michael.

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Guest BarcodeIIIlll

I suggest that you get some great uplifting spiritual music and listen to it.

With words- like Mormon Tab choir is good, but even just the hymns without words can help.

also get out to nature, and let yourself de stress. Get alone (from people) but God is there and we are never alone.

You say "everything is gone" but actually I think you are just feeling lost in a dense fog-- or darkness,

and without reaching OUT for the good things you felt before, you don't feel them now.

The trials in our life are to help us grow stronger (think of even weight lifting- it builds muscles)

If you like to read, you could read some good books.

One part of the Narnia Chronicled has the kids in the clutches of the Green Lady, who causes them to no longer feel what is right, or remember much of the sun- but Puddlegum says- out of the deep depression-- something to the effect- that even if there IS no sun- still he would WANT to believe and would be happier TO believe that there was one, and THAT wanting to have hope saves them.

--- The fact that you are on here says you long for what you had-- and probably still have but it is just covered in the fog.

You can be forgiven for everything (well maybe except blasphemy against the holy ghost-- but you have not received enough light to qualify for that ;) so don't worry.

--- Satan WANTS you to give up, and feel it is lost and no use, that you aren't worthy

(all the things HE feels and HAS lost and can't get back!) You have a life, you have choices, you HAVE been baptized, and you have great potential that he wants to destroy!

In the twilight book series- (if I remember right) one talent a vampire had was tracking- and he can turn it around and AVOID the person he needs to avoid by going opposite of the way he would if he was tracking them.

Satan is who we need to avoid- and anything he wants us to do-- like

leave the church, swear, feel unworthy etc) --- then we can be "oppositional defiant" to Satan!

Get good music, get around some GOOD friends, tell your bishop you need help, or any priesthood over you, get a priesthood blessing. Even if YOU feel you don't have faith, THEIRS can help you, if only you have the desire! like the bible said the father said when told he needed faith for his child to be healed-- "Lord I have faith, ---Help thou my unbelief!"

You CAN do this, or you wouldn't be faced with this challenge to need to do it!

You must actually be MUCH stronger than you think to even HAVE been given such a challenge.

Depression is the total pits to deal with.

Have i commited a big sin, rejecting the holy ghost? Im in deep arnt I? :'(

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NO! WAY!

I understand that It is only those who have received direct visions etc and then turned to deny them and destroy the church-

I understand that VERY few have or will be qualified to be able to sin so bad-- I imagine that Judas Iscariot might be one- but we are NOT to judge others-- ONLY Jesus Christ can do that as he knows their hearts.

Sorry-- you sure took that the wrong way-- hope you are not masochistic! (like to torture yourself!)

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Have I committed a big sin, rejecting the holy ghost? I'm in deep aren't I? :'(

Ok, don't think I'm laughing at you here, but I did laugh when I read that! Seriously, you think you've actually, with forcefulness, in the presence of the holy ghost, said "Get lost"?! I'm sorry - I'm still laughing. I hope you can laugh, or at least smile, along with me. :)

I may be completely wrong here - I often am - but it sounds to me that what you want is the first flush of love all over again. You know, the feeling you get when everything is new and wonderful, and you put the milk in the cupboard and the sugar in the fridge without realising what you've done..?

Similarly to when you fall in love, when the spirit gives you an 'Oomph' and you feel on cloud nine it's not uncommon to want that feeling again and again. But while it may happen at various times in your life, the spirit isn't there to give you or me a personal boost and loved-up feeling whenever we desire it. (In fact, that's one of the reasons I think most people do drugs; they have an innate sense of past warmth and glory, and want to feel it all the time. But that's another story).

If this makes any sense, consider the fact that you've had a glimpse of a diamond that those around you perhaps haven't. You don't have to be Moroni and stand on the roof with a trumpet, you just have to be you. And a happy you. Do you think your heavenly father and mother, however you perceive them, want you to live a miserable life? Well, I don't know if the way life is for you right now is a challenge meant to test you, or just the crap the world throws at us regardless. And you probably won't until you think about it in years to come (which is always fun!)

Don't worry about sins too much. Say, "Thanks Father and Mother!" at least once a day, and do things you like whenever you can. Life can always get better, I promise.

Edit (next morning at 6am) Don't know whether it was the spirit or my subconscious, but I awoke after a dream telling me what an acronym I'd used in this post meant, and it wasn't good! I'd thought it was just shorthand for a very British way of saying, "Get lost", but it tuned out not to be. Thanks for catching that Pam. I've re-edited it above.

Edited by IAmTheWork
Inappropriate acronym for lds.net
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IAMtheWork said,

Don't worry about sins too much. Say, "Thanks Father and Mother!" at least once a day, and do things you like whenever you can.

What? Really? Don't worry about sins too much? So just do sins whenever you can?

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What? Really? Don't worry about sins too much? So just do sins whenever you can?

Ah, no; I should have been clearer about that.

What I meant is don't be over-worried about considering everything a sin - something I see people do a lot. In fact there's a culture of 'wrongness' in society these days, and in the UK you can now be accused of 'Hate crime' and arrested for saying something someone else doesn't like. George Orwell's work comes to mind!

We have the basic guidelines of course, but sometimes people can tangle themselves up in knots and continually beat themselves up over nothing, which is not the way the Lord would have us live, I'm sure. In fact, it leads to ill health. Better to just follow the Lord's plan for a good life, and be happy and worry-free.

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I see what you all mean, Its just, I want that desire to beleive again, so there is part of me that wants to be active (i am active because im trying) And i do want to do what Rameumptom did, apart serve a mission, until im elderly. I kow my family wont join, but i still have the passion and i want to marry LDS and raise my childeren in the church. part of its still there, i guess i just need to keep looking to find that spirit again for myself.

I encourage you to read Alma 32.

As previously stated, praying, fasting, studying the scriptures, coming to church - all of these helps the spirit stay with us. I promise you, that if you regularly pray with a sincere heart and with that desire to believe, it will come.

Alma 32:27

"But behold, if ye will awake and arouse your faculties, even to an experiment upon my words, and exercise a particle of faith, yea, even if ye can no more than desire to believe, let this desire work in you, even until ye believe in a manner that ye can give place for a portion of my words."

Alma 32Â*

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