Overcoming my bitterness towards members of the church


Guest The_Real_Enigma
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I'm a Harley rider. You know how many other Mormons are Harley riders??? Or even have a motorcycle?

Not a lot.

mrmarklin - I beg to differ with your remark above. Are you not familar with the Temple Riders Association? This group has a very large following in many states with many chapters. In fact, it is growing year by year. I also personally know many members that do not have any TRA chapters in their state, but are avid Harley (and other brands of bikes) riders. They participate with community needs & wants, as well as, to share the gospel & info about the LDS church.

You can find info about TRA at this link: Official Website of the Temple Riders Association

Pacifica

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Enigma, I gotta say, I was never a popular kid at school. I'm sorry to hear what happened to you, but at the same time, I think you let them affect your feelings too much. Unfortunately, it take self-confidence to let that slide off your back - the very thing that most kids growing up do not have.

It sounds like your past is leading you to not allowing yourself to be set up that way again. That's understandable.

I've only got three suggestions:

1) Service. It really does help. The biggest issue is you have to stop thinking about your self and work on serving others.

2) Fake it. Pretend to be the person you want to be. You'll become it after awhile.

3) If there's a LDS Social Services near by, you want to go to counseling with them. I'm sure they can provide some expert advice.

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I, too, have been persecuted by church members...it was awful, and I, too, have had a hard time letting go and trusting people again. It is hard. It is hard to keep going, and it is hard to reach out in the spirit of friendship only to be smacked down once again.

I won't do that to you. I have made it my personal mission to make others feel welcome and cared about, others that might not fit into the mold, others that feel left out and unwanted. It still happens sometimes that an investigator or a re-activating member will have the courage come to church, and for some reason someone else will try to 'warn' me about them...and let me tell you I usually give them an earful.

I have coped with my dissappointment by being that unconditional friend. It has really empowered me to take my church experience and make it more than simply attending...I find great enjoyment in being an active part in the fight against the adversary. I won't sit by and let him talk people into ostricizing someone for any reason...

and we have to remember that sometimes those people that were awful to us will feel really bad about what they did/said that was hurtful, and even though we want to hit them over the head with a chair, we have to, instead, forgive them and move on.

humor helps too

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I'm a Harley rider. You know how many other Mormons are Harley riders??? Or even have a motorcycle?

Not a lot.

NO Harley Riders but Six motorcycle riders in our Ward.

We've had 1 Bishop and 2 Bishopric who have been.

While not every sunny Sunday but it is not unusual to have a least one bike in the parking lot.

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My hubby rides a motorcycle..It is so cute to see him go to his church meetings with his suit on, tie flying over his shoulder, like marvin the martian with this huge black helmet on.

People do judge him a little for it, but not much. In one lesson shortly after he started riding it to church, G.D. class they were talking about kingdoms, and the teacher said "You can ride motorcycle and still get to the middle kingdom!" I jumped. He was the other counselor in the bishopric. :) I would like to assume he was joking, but it doesn't really matter...as long as the Savior approves of my hubby, that's all that matters.

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I seriously don't think the Lord cares one way or the other what we drive in order to get to church, just that we get there. Limo, helicopter, car, van, foot, donkey, horse, skateboard, canoe or bicycle who cares? One mode does not make you more worthy then another.

Judging someone by the mode of transport they use is one of the most idiotic things I've heard of members doing.

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In the picture I am wearing a black balaclava with sunglasses, the reason is threefold, since I call myself the Real Enigma I think it's funny to hide my face since the definition of enigma is, mystery.

The second reason is I do not want people to know what I look like, I am, as have said in my profile, a soldier.

Like it or not we are at war, the internet is a both a wondrous and dangerous place. Any one on this forum could be a terrorist, a terrorist sympathizer and or someone who is out to get soldiers. (Nothing personal, it's just an occupational hazard of being a warrior of freedom.)

The third reason is: I'm fat and ugly. Okay not fat enough to not be allowed in the army and ugly is probably only in my mind.

Bottom line: People don't need to know what I look like!-_-

1 makes sense, I guess cause I'm a Canadian I don't get the need for 2, 3 is a mind thing.

I was just wondering because we usually take what we believe our self image is and transfer that thinking into the minds of others. Then we project every interaction through that filter to determine what the level of interaction is.

Which of course is most often not completely correct.

Just don't sell yourself short, our appearance might make the first impression but it is what is inside and how we use it that makes the long haul. A woman in the town nearest us has some kind of disease that causes huge purple lumps all over her face. It is very startling to be caught of guard when you first see her. Yet she has friends and attends many functions and laugh's.

She is very disfigured and many people would be turned off by her appearance. I can not imagine the courage it must take for her to endure the looks and comments she must face.

You are willing to defend other people's freedom, that is truly a noble and courageous cause and something to be proud of. I seriously considered the military route after high school but, having studied military history and the consequences of combat, I did not have the courage to do what you do.

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