Kids say the darndest things during Sacrament Meeting

[SeattleTruthSeeker]

Yesterday, it was just my daughter (16 months old), step-son, and myself. She is pretty good at being as reverent for a toddler. However, her brother is 13 years old and passes sacrament.

Well, we were sitting in the overflow area and I was holding her in my lap. It was time for sacrament and she noticed her brother standing a few pews down. She pointed and said "Whose dat? Day Day!!!" I quickly quieted her down and there were a few chuckles around us. My stepson turned and tried very hard to stifle his laugh and smile. When the water was passed, she again saw her big brother and even louder "Whose Dat? Day Day!" and more chuckles as I got her to quiet down, reminding her that yes it is her brother however it is sacrament.

Well, I had not realized how loud she had gotten until our bishop walked up to me and said that she must really love her big brother because he heard her all the way up to where he was sitting.

Any good stories members have about kids saying the darndest things in sacrament meeting?

[slamjet]

How about in primary?

I was visiting my kids so I hung out in the primary sharing time to be with my kids. They asked a loaded question: "Who are the Jews?" What does my 9 year old boy say? "Aren't they the ones who have lots of money?"

I wanted to die.

[Family_Man]

My five year old told people I wasn't at church because I was "killing people". I assume he meant that I am deployed, and assumes I kill bad guys, but I am actually a medic, so I usually try not to kill the people I come in contact with.

I have no idea what the response was, but most people in my ward know my situation.

[seeking_peace]

During the passing of the sacrament one week, a parent was apparently trying to occupy their young child by telling them to think about Jesus or to look at pictures of Christ, but the child was not interested. The quiet in the chapel was interrupted by the little voice defiantly declaring, “But I don’t like Jesus!”

[MarginOfError]

During the passing of the sacrament one week, a parent was apparently trying to occupy their young child by telling them to think about Jesus or to look at pictures of Christ, but the child was not interested. The quiet in the chapel was interrupted by the little voice defiantly declaring, “But I don’t like Jesus!”

Priceless

[NeuroTypical]

We were watching our 2 yr old niece, and hauled her to church with us. My wife took her to the bathroom during sacrament. As she was climbing over the people in the pew to get to us, she yelled "UNCLE [LM] I WENT PEE-PEE ON THE POTTY!!!!" I'm sure the microphone picked her up and carried her voice to the overflow and mother's lounge.

[Gwen]

i'm gonna tell on my brother. he had a game at home with his kids where when he passed gas he'd blame it on someone else. one sunday, during the sacrament when all was quiet, his young daughter passed gas, really loud and equally as loud exclaimed "daddy!!!"

my kids antics are usually seconds before the meeting is to start. we have a really small branch and our family sits up front so everyone gets to watch. i've collected everything from about 30 golf balls (at one time) to earthworms.

[JudoMinja]

This was technically not something a child "said", but funny just the same.

It was our bishop's two year old. As the water was being passed, he was walking back and forth along the pew going "blub-a-blub-a-blub-a-blub-a" (the noise from moving your tounge back and forth on your lips or rubbing your lips with your finger). As the water came closer and closer to his pew, he got louder and louder, until it was in the pew right in front of him. He then tried to take a step forward and fell off the pew. The bishop was in the front trying not to laugh as his wife took the boy outside.

[Blackmarch]

Yesterday, it was just my daughter (16 months old), step-son, and myself. She is pretty good at being as reverent for a toddler. However, her brother is 13 years old and passes sacrament.

Well, we were sitting in the overflow area and I was holding her in my lap. It was time for sacrament and she noticed her brother standing a few pews down. She pointed and said "Whose dat? Day Day!!!" I quickly quieted her down and there were a few chuckles around us. My stepson turned and tried very hard to stifle his laugh and smile. When the water was passed, she again saw her big brother and even louder "Whose Dat? Day Day!" and more chuckles as I got her to quiet down, reminding her that yes it is her brother however it is sacrament.

Well, I had not realized how loud she had gotten until our bishop walked up to me and said that she must really love her big brother because he heard her all the way up to where he was sitting.

Any good stories members have about kids saying the darndest things in sacrament meeting?

one meeting meeting my mom was in there was a small family a couple rows in front of her and they had a young tyke between mom and dad and suddenly he starts sniffing and says, "What stink-ed?" then he sniffs each parent and says "Nope, not you"

[pam]

When my daughter was about 7 years old, I had gotten strep throat. A couple of weeks later I had a reaction from the strep and broke out from scalp to feet with what they call strep psoriasis. Not contagious just not a pretty sight at all.

We were in fast and testimony meeting and my daughter, as usual, got up to bear her testimony. She went through the usual, I love my family, I love my mom and dad. Then she said "I hope my mom gets better and can get rid of all those ugly red spots all over her body." I about died but the congregation had a good laugh watching me sink down into the pew.

[rameumptom]

Years ago, a friend had a small child that was being disruptive. So, he picked up the child to carry him out of the chapel. As they left, the child screamed and then said, "Bishop! Help!"

[pam]

Years ago, a friend had a small child that was being disruptive. So, he picked up the child to carry him out of the chapel. As they left, the child screamed and then said, "Bishop! Help!"

That's a very old joke. Elder Oaks told this story in general conference in 1997.

Edited March 29, 2011 by pam

[The_Phoenix]

Yesterday, it was just my daughter (16 months old), step-son, and myself. She is pretty good at being as reverent for a toddler. However, her brother is 13 years old and passes sacrament.

Well, we were sitting in the overflow area and I was holding her in my lap. It was time for sacrament and she noticed her brother standing a few pews down. She pointed and said "Whose dat? Day Day!!!" I quickly quieted her down and there were a few chuckles around us. My stepson turned and tried very hard to stifle his laugh and smile. When the water was passed, she again saw her big brother and even louder "Whose Dat? Day Day!" and more chuckles as I got her to quiet down, reminding her that yes it is her brother however it is sacrament.

Well, I had not realized how loud she had gotten until our bishop walked up to me and said that she must really love her big brother because he heard her all the way up to where he was sitting.

Any good stories members have about kids saying the darndest things in sacrament meeting?

When my son was giving his farewell for his mission my youngest granddaughter kept calling out his name while he was speaking. He had a hard time not laughing (me as well). Oh how I miss him!

[applepansy]

Several months my husband was asked to say one of the prayers in Sacrament meeting. My grandson wasn't paying attention until he heard grandpa's voice. He stayed quiet but very seriously watched. When hubby was done and was walking back to sit with us, my grandson says (very loudly) "Grandpa said Amen." I shushed him and said yes but he didn't think I gave it enough credit because he again very loudly said "Grandpa said Amen!"

I have more stories......There are girls in our ward who love to sit behind us in Sacrament meeting. They have said its the most entertaining place in the chapel. One Sunday we had to sit in the middle because the side pews were all taken. While the sacrament was being passed my grandson was pulling faces at one of the men behind us, who was pulling faces back. FIVE rows of people were laughing during the sacrament. Now we sit on the side or in the back!

[gomspal]

We had our testimony meeting last Sunday (3-27) since it's General Conference time this April 2-3. Two sisters ages 5 and 7 probably, got up to bear their testimonies. The younger one said, " I'd like to bear my testimony....I know the church is two.... I know my family loves me....We have a living prophet.... Thomas S. Jefferson.... in the name..... The older sister said the same thing, except the church is two.

They probably watch Harry's Law!

[Wingnut]

(1) When my brother was young (3? 4, maybe?), I had a friend -- I was in high school at the time -- whose family always sat behind ours in Sacrament meeting. My friend's older brother had just gotten home from a mission, and it was his first Sunday at church. We'd moved into the ward after he left, so we'd never met him yet. He's (in his own words) "six-foot-seven-and-three-quarters," and while not fat, he's definitely not a lanky guy. All three boys in the family were very tall, and two of them were pretty bulky, too. Anyway, my brother, seeing him for the first time, and feeling quite intimidated, asked, "Who's that guy with Ryan's [my friend's] family with this huge nostrils?"

(2) This wasn't in Sacrament meeting, but rather preparing for it. When my brother was a little bit older, my dad was trying to teach him about the priesthood, specifically the Aaronic, and was explaining the offices, and how they each participated in the Sacrament ordinance. My brother repeated in wonder, "Deacons, and teachers, and priests?" My sister and I -- without hesitation -- responded with, "Oh, my!"

(3) A story I've told here once or twice already, but never fails to make me laugh. In the last ward I attended, prior to moving here, my husband and I didn't have our daughter yet. We always sat on the same row in the chapel, always behind the same family. That family had three boys -- 5, 3, and 1 years old. Between the three of them, mom was bringing so many toys and distraction activities to church each week that she filled a huge canvas tote bag (one of the ginormous ones from LL Bean) with stuff, and that didn't include her purse, scriptures, or diaper bag. (Eventually she finally put toys and books in rolling mini suitcases and made the older boys "carry" their own stuff.) One Sunday, during the talks, the 3-year-old started digging through the bag, apparently looking for something specific. He was very intent, and it was rather amusing. I nudged my husband, only to notice that he was also already watching the boy. Pretty soon the boy realized that we were watching him, so rather than continue digging to the bottom of the bag for whatever it was that he was seeking, he just began pulling stuff out and throwing it over his shoulders. Soon enough the bag was empty. This little boy climbed into the bag, looked us each square in the eye, and said, "I'm in da bag!" It was the most hilarious thing ever. Both my husband and I -- without looking at each other to fuel it on -- almost had to get up and leave because we were laughing so hard. The boy, of course, getting quite a reaction, repeated his statement several times until his mom (who had an amazing ability to tune the boys out completely and pay attention to the sacrament meeting talks) finally heard and shushed him. The following week, he did it again, but this time is was, "I'm in da suitcase," which, while still entertaining, could not replace an original.

[rameumptom]

That's a very old joke. Elder Oaks told this story in general conference in 1997.

Yes, I know. But it actually happened in one of my wards also.

[Jennarator]

My mom likes to tell about how when she was young, she attened the Spanish Branch, as her father is Mexican. She and her cousin used to get really impatient as prayers in the branch would go on for 10-15 minutes. One day she and her cousin started shouting "AMEN!" each time the person giving the prayer would go on about Jesus Christ during the prayer, because that was one of the few things they understood in Spanish, they thought the prayer was finally going to be over. (Or hoped it was going to be over.)

[Jennarator]

Here's one that just happened a couple weeks ago:

The speaker in Sacrament Meeting said that was getting married married to a pretty girl, means you are a lucky man, so he must be the luckiest, then my son... turned to me and said, "No, Mommy, Ryan is the luckiest man." (Ryan is my husband, my son calls him that, because my husband is his step father.)

[Honor]

My older brother is a DJ and he's got a rather deep and rich, typical "announcer" voice. He's had it since High School. There was one Sunday that he was blessing the sacrament and there was a small boy (maybe 4 or 5) seated on the pew in front of my family. As my brother started to say the prayer, the child looked up at his parents, then started craning his neck around the chapel to see where the voice was coming from (overhead speaker). When the prayer was over the child faced his mom with wide eyes and in a reverenced but almost horrified tone said, "Mom....... was that God?!"

Edited March 29, 2011 by Honor

[Jennarator]

my older brother is a dj and he's got a rather deep and rich, typical "announcer" voice. He's had it since high school. There was one sunday that he was blessing the sacrament and there was a small boy (maybe 4 or 5) seated on the pew in front of my family. As my brother started to say the prayer, the child looked up at his parents, then started craning his neck around the chapel to see where the voice was coming from (overhead speaker). When the prayer was over the child faced his mom with wide eyes and in a reverenced but almost horrified tone said, "mom....... Was that god?!"

that is classic!!

[mordorbund]

My ward growing up liked to single out certain women on Mother's Day - like the newest mom, or the mom with the most kids, grandkids, etc. Just so you know, if you try to help your mom up when they ask about the oldest mom, you will be popped, and EVERYONE will hear it.

But it's soooo worth it.

[Wingnut]

My ward growing up liked to single out certain women on Mother's Day - like the newest mom, or the mom with the most kids, grandkids, etc. Just so you know, if you try to help your mom up when they ask about the oldest mom, you will be popped, and EVERYONE will hear it.

But it's soooo worth it.

They used to to do that in a ward I was in as a teenager. I thought it was fun. Mom with the most kids (it wasn't always the same, because sometimes grandmas were visiting from out of town), newest, oldest, etc. I liked it.

[lizzy16]

When I was a 3, 13 lovely years ago, I was being potty trained and stood up in church flipped up my dress and yelled "Look mommy! No panties" In the middle of the meeting. I was a trickster and took them off

My mom had my brother before she met my father. My mom was 19, my dad was 28 at this time. My mom was attending the singles ward with my brother and my dad was teaching. My mom said he threw up all over everyone and everyone went home early.

A few weeks later my mom introduced her self and my dad said "The mom of the kid who puked right?"

Little did she know that a month or so after the puking incident my dad was in love with my brother (more so then with her or so says my mother.). My dad sat next to them in church and would point to himself and say "daddy" and then point to my brother and say 'zacky'. Keep in mind my parents were dating for a few weeks.

My brother stood up on the pew and pointed to my dad and yelled "Daddy!"

A few members afterwards asked if they were getting married.

My mom didn't realize my dad taught Zack to say this. She was convinced that Zack had chosen his dad and she decided at that moment she'd marry that man.

My dad proposed a few months later.

[dekylo]

A few weeks ago our four year old was looking at the new gospel art book during the sacrament. He came to a picture of Moses and the burning bush and asked "is that Jesus or are those fireflies?"