"The Peacegiver" by James Ferrell


MrShorty
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I finished reading The Peacegiver by James Ferrell. I'm not sure what to call this book. Parable doesn't seem right, though it is definitely fiction.

Basic plot: Rick is in a troubled, temple marriage to Carol (whom we really only see through Rick's eyes). In the midst of Rick's troubles, his deceased grandfather (who also had troubles in his marriage) visits Rick in a series of visions/dreams. In these visions, Rick visits situations from the scripture (David/Nabal/Abigail, Jonah, Christ in Gethsemanee) and is taught about the Atonement and how, as the book's subtitle says, Christ offers to heal our hearts and homes. For those who read this as pure fiction, you will be dissappointed at the end, because brother Ferrel doesn't resolve Rick and Carol's conflicts -- the conflict is left open.

Overall impression: I identified with Rick in many ways, so there was an emotional connection while reading the book for me. Brother Ferrell doesn't go into the specifics of Rick and Carol's problems, which makes it relatively easy for each reader to put themselves into Rick's shoes.

The book has a good message, and I thought the situations and discussions between Rick and his Grandfather did at good job at demonstrating how the atonement works in an overall sense. Because the book doesn't go into the specifics of the relationship, there aren't any real relationship skills or other specific skills taught.

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Is this the book where Rick remembers his grandmother's ill treatment of his grandfather, but the grandfather feels so guilty because of the one time he responded with a snippy comeback to her continued unkindness? If so, I'll say the book left me cold. But I admit that may be a result of my own spiritual immaturity.

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Really great book. I loved it. The Holy Secret is also really good by the same author.

Other books along the same vein put out by the Arbinger Institute (James Ferrell is the managing director) that are really good are The Anatomy of Peace and Leadership and Self Deception.

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I didn't completely love the book, but this statement really hit me:

"When we withhold forgiveness from others, we are in effect saying that the atonement alone was insufficient to pay for this sin. We are holding out for more. We are finding fault with the Lord's offering."

I was dealing with the aftermath of my husband's affair at the time and it really put things in perspective for me. It helped me see him as a child of God worthy of forgiveness.

Several months later, the bishop asked my husband to read the book. His take on it was that I was not doing enough....

I guess the way you interpret a book is highly colored by your own state of mind.

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Several months later, the bishop asked my husband to read the book. His take on it was that I was not doing enough....

I guess the way you interpret a book is highly colored by your own state of mind.

That's probably true. It seemed to me that this book intends for the reader to put himself/herself in Rick's place, and gain understanding for oneself. Not to point out Carol's/spouse's faults and what Carol/spouse should do to reconcile. I hope your husband managed to get something out of the book for himself. If all he got was a better picture of your faults, I think he missed the whole point of the book.

"When we withhold forgiveness from others, we are in effect saying that the atonement alone was insufficient to pay for this sin. We are holding out for more. We are finding fault with the Lord's offering."

I was dealing with the aftermath of my husband's affair at the time and it really put things in perspective for me. It helped me see him as a child of God worthy of forgiveness.

This might demonstrate what I thought was both the strength and weakness of the book. The strength in the sense that it did a good job of making the atonement and it's place in our relationships understandable, in a "big picture" sense, while leaving out enough detail to be flexible enough for most to apply it to themselves.

Without the details, though, it might be difficult to really see how it applies personally. In general, Abigail's gift to David caused David to see that he should not pursue vengeance against Nabal, but rather forgive him. In David and Nabal's case, forgiveness takes the form of a change of David's heart/attitude, and David wishes Nabal well and leaves. One has to be careful not to take any analogy too far, but, in marriage, a "wish him/her well and leave" result is generally considered a failure/lesser of two evils result. What we want to see in a troubled marriage is full blown reconciliation. I guess it comes down to this: the ideas in the book, such as forgiveness, can apply to a "marriage" whether the couple reconciles or not. It doesn't really show the path to reconciliation, but shows the importance of the atonement/relying on Christ whether the couple reconciles or not.

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