Prayer And Gods Will

[shanstress70]

Shanstress,

Is it wrong to believe this? I know this is a difficult topic for you but if some people pray, and this strengthens their faith then why does it bother you? Don't trying to offend you in any way but how does praying affect you in the end? Just wondering what feeling you get with the outcome of a prayer whether it was the way you wanted it to turn out or not.

The reason this is such a sore subject for me is because of how it makes those feel whose prayers weren't answered.

A very dear LDS friend once told me a story about someone (lets say Mary) whose small child died of a brain tumor. There was another mother (Lisa) whose child had something similar and the doctor sd she was terminal. Lisa's child however had a 'miracle' and lived.

Mary had to leave fast & testimony meeting once bc Lisa was talking about how they thanked everyone who helped them pray for her little one to live, and on and on about how God had plans for her little one, etc. Of course Mary was happy for Lisa, but she suffered severe depression wondering what she failed to do to get God to hear her prayers. The entire ward was praying for her child too. Why had God not given her what she asked for?

I know what you'll probably say, that God had other plans for Mary's little one and needed her in Heaven, or she was special, or whatever. But if someone loses a child, it's difficult to believe what you're 'supposed' to believe about it.

I just think those who talk about prayers being answered need to keep in mind those whose prayers have NOT been answered. This issue can make some feel horrible with guilt.

That said, I do think prayer is helpful to us... although I don't think it will change the outcome of anything, except to lighten our load.

[StrawberryFields]

<div class='quotemain'>

Shanstress,

Is it wrong to believe this? I know this is a difficult topic for you but if some people pray, and this strengthens their faith then why does it bother you? Don't trying to offend you in any way but how does praying affect you in the end? Just wondering what feeling you get with the outcome of a prayer whether it was the way you wanted it to turn out or not.

The reason this is such a sore subject for me is because of how it makes those feel whose prayers weren't answered.

A very dear LDS friend once told me a story about someone (lets say Mary) whose small child died of a brain tumor. There was another mother (Lisa) whose child had something similar and the doctor sd she was terminal. Lisa's child however had a 'miracle' and lived.

Mary had to leave fast & testimony meeting once bc Lisa was talking about how they thanked everyone who helped them pray for her little one to live, and on and on about how God had plans for her little one, etc. Of course Mary was happy for Lisa, but she suffered severe depression wondering what she failed to do to get God to hear her prayers. The entire ward was praying for her child too. Why had God not given her what she asked for?

I know what you'll probably say, that God had other plans for Mary's little one and needed her in Heaven, or she was special, or whatever. But if someone loses a child, it's difficult to believe what you're 'supposed' to believe about it.

I just think those who talk about prayers being answered need to keep in mind those whose prayers have NOT been answered. This issue can make some feel horrible with guilt.

That said, I do think prayer is helpful to us... although I don't think it will change the outcome of anything, except to lighten our load.

Shanstress,

First of all I want you to know that I love you. I love your honesty and your spirit. Yes, we have had these discussions before about prayer. I am sorry I have never asked you why you feel so strongly this way about the ability to pray and help our loved ones. It would be wrong for me to try and guess why your friends’ child did not survive. I am so sorry to hear when people lose someone very close to them and I know of the guilt that surrounds a parent when they lose a child.

I was raised in a 'less active home' with a brother who was just 11 months older then me. My parents belonged to a group such as the Lions Club and they had a baseball team who was playing one night at a local park. Behind the baseball diamond there was a fence with a light wired to light up home plate. My 8 year old brother began to climb this fence and was electrocuted. My father began to give him life support measures but the paramedics didn't show up for 45 mins. My brother was DOA. The newspaper told of my father’s efforts to save his son which only added to the guilt of my father. Years later, we were still not allowed to speak much of my brother because of the pain it caused my father. My father felt as if he had not done something right in his life and his son was taken from him. I remember very clearly looking into my dads eyes two years ago today, just a year after he and I held my mother as she died of cancer. My dad for just a short glimpse appeared much younger to me. I could actually feel his pain as he watched my husband and myself go through the motions of being cordial to our family when we had no idea of what the outcome of our own child would be. Just an hour ago we had seen Nick flat on the dirty class covered floor of that garage where he worked. I went to my dad and just held him tight as he trembled in my arms.

I am trying to remember who it was who recently said that they ask our Father in Heaven to relieve the suffering of their loved one who was dying. When my mom was terminally ill with cancer it was suggested to us (by hospice) that we do this for my mom and my dad agreed. I had never thought that this would fall upon my husband (the priesthood representative in the family) to ask our Father to take my mother. I am not kidding when I tell you that she was gone within hours of that blessing. Talk about guilt. This is the reason why I came to LDS Talk. I wanted to know how all of this could happen... I felt like because we were the active ones in my small family that we had been asked to shorten my moms’ life. I can now clearly see the things that lead up to my moms hastening of her death and if anything that prayer has indeed a blessing to lessen her suffering. I had also had some great PM's from some board members here some of which you would expect and some which would surprise you.

Pray has always been a great asset to me in my life and although I will be more careful (because of your story) who I shout this story of a miracle too it will not stifle me. I believe that we will never know all of the answers here on earth, and you can bet I will have my own list of heartfelt questions when I meet my Father again.

Shan, I am sorry that your friend lost her child. I am sorry that my brother was taken at such a young age. I wished that my mom didn’t have to die at 63 and miss out of her life with my dad and our family. I still believe that our Heavenly Father creates Miracles in our lives some are large and some are small.

To anyone who wants to answer….

What is a Miracle?

[Dr T]

Hello S.F.,

We can start tith Marriem Johnson's definition:

miracle

4 entries found for miracle.

To select an entry, click on it.

miraclemiracle drugmiracle fruitmiracle play

Main Entry: mir·a·cle

Pronunciation: 'mir-i-k&l

Function: noun

Etymology: Middle English, from Anglo-French, from Late Latin miraculum, from Latin, a wonder, marvel, from mirari to wonder at

1 : an extraordinary event manifesting divine intervention in human affairs

2 : an extremely outstanding or unusual event, thing, or accomplishment

3 Christian Science : a divinely natural phenomenon experienced humanly as the fulfillment of spiritual law

[shanstress70]

Gosh, SF... what to say about all that??? Thanks for sharing.

I'm so sorry you lost your brother, AND I'm sorry you lost your mother.

And now for your son to have had this horrible thing happen to him! I really hope he comes through it all with flying colors. My thoughts and YES prayers are with you and your family as you go through this.

[Guest ApostleKnight]

What is a Miracle?

I believe a miracle is a phenomenon or event that we don't fully understand, and can't reproduce by ourselves.

[StrawberryFields]

It's been a long, emotionally draining day. Long Story made short, Nick will under go surgery this Wed to hopefully remove the infected skin and close the festering cyst. If the infection doesn't reappear then we will believe that the infection has been taken care of. If it reappears, they will put him on six weeks of IV antibiotics and use the hyerbaric chamber for 60 days to raise his white blood cells. The last resort will be surgery to remove ALL of the hardware they used to rebuild his face two years ago.

[Guest ApostleKnight]

SF, my best thoughts and wishes are with you.

[pushka]

SF, my heart goes out to you, your son and your family. I wish him all the very best in these coming days.

[shanstress70]

It's been a long, emotionally draining day. Long Story made short, Nick will under go surgery this Wed to hopefully remove the infected skin and close the festering cyst. If the infection doesn't reappear then we will believe that the infection has been taken care of. If it reappears, they will put him on six weeks of IV antibiotics and use the hyerbaric chamber for 60 days to raise his white blood cells. The last resort will be surgery to remove ALL of the hardware they used to rebuild his face two years ago.

Please keep us updated... we all care about you and your family!!!

[StrawberryFields]

The surgery is finished and Nick is recovering with his head wrapped up in a familiar looking turban again. His plastic surgeon spoke with us following the surgery. The infection goes deep, all the way to the plate. He took the infected skin out then he added triple antibiotics after an special irrigation wash. He then closed him up and wrapped him in this 'turban'. Now we need to make sure it stays clean and that Nick gets the rest he needs. Because it goes deep, to the plate, we need some major intervention or Nick will need to go through all that I mentioned before.

[Jason]

Thanks for the update 'berry. Im sorry for you and your son. I hope his body pulls out another medical miracle for you.

[begood2]

SF,

I will pray for Nick's recovery and also for strength and comfort for his family.

I have followed Nick's ordeal for over a year now and he seems like family to me.

I'm so sorry that this had to happen to him and I hope that all goes well.

[begood2]

SF,

I just read your post about about your brother and your mom and I'm so sorry that their time with you on Earth was so short.

Yes, I believe in miracles and I don't know why some people are saved by them and others are not, but I do have faith in Jesus Christ as our savior and feel that someday this time on earth will be like a blink of the eye and we as a family will all be together again in Heaven if we follow his teachings.

[StrawberryFields]

SF,

I just read your post about about your brother and your mom and I'm so sorry that their time with you on Earth was so short.

Yes, I believe in miracles and I don't know why some people are saved by them and others are not, but I do have faith in Jesus Christ as our savior and feel that someday this time on earth will be like a blink of the eye and we as a family will all be together again in Heaven if we follow his teachings.

Thanks Begood, I too believe that.

Jason, I love that you call me 'berry and thanks for the well wishes.

Thanks too to those who show kindness, to me, a internet stranger.

Tonight beside the pain, which he has meds for, Nick feels as all is well and that is all I need to sleep tonight.

[StrawberryFields]

I will try to make this as short as possible but I need a 'sounding board', read no further if this does not interest you.

The infection has manifested itself again.

The major surgery to take out all of the plates and grafts will be postponed while they try the other procedures.

Nick will under go 6-8 weeks on IV antibiotics where they will place a pic line deep into a major vein.

He will under go approx. 60 days of hyberbaric medicine. http://intermountainhealthcare.org/xp/publ.../hyperbaric.xml

Today the took another sample of the infection in his head because the lab had botched the one taken the day of his surgery 2 weeks ago. When the results come back they will know how to treat the infection.

Monday we have an appointment with the director of the hyperharic medicine and with a doctor with the infectiuos disease department.

I feel a bit overwhelmed right now.

[Guest ApostleKnight]

God be with you and your son SF, in every way you need. How generic is that? But I really mean it. You're not alone. We're pulling for you guys! :)

[pushka]

Good Luck, SF..

[StrawberryFields]

Thanks for the well wishes again.

I did some research of the Hyperbaric Chamber and I found this.

http://www.ksl.com/?nid=148&sid=141387

This is who is going to treat Nick. Maybe in addition to helping clear up the infection it could also help with his brain injury. I can't wait to talk to him on Monday to see how the study is going. :)

[Mr Revenant]

<div class='quotemain'>

Who does it it help when we pray for someone?

Is it best to pray or to let Gods Will be done?

When a blessing is given for the sick is it the faith that heals someone or is it Gods Will?

What should be asked for in a prayer for someone you care about and who is afflicted?

I would think that the answer is BOTH. God's will is for us to have faith. And Christ said that if we have faith of a mustard seed we could say to the mountain move and it would be done. I believe the "trick" is to first pray to know the will of the Lord, and then, with all faith, pray that it be done!

:)

[shanstress70]

I will be thinking of you and your family through all of this. I sympathize with you, as a mother. How is Nick now? Is he awake and aware of the plans? Is he in good spirits?

I wish you all well, and yes, I send my prayers! :)

[StrawberryFields]

Thank you Shanstress. :)

Nick is currently doing okay. He, like the rest of us pray that this will make the infection go away. If this does not work we have no choice but the start from square one and have everything (plates, screws, bone grafts, and composite materials) removed. To leave the infection in the plate, touching his brain, could..."shudder to think". Nick will need to go without anything covering his brain except his skin for 6 months if they take everything out.

My daughter, who will be a senior, starts school in another city 4 hours away on the 14th of Aug. If Nick is not doing well enough for me to leave him at that time she will need to go to a school closer to here. The reason she is attending another school is for her benefit and I have been living there with her. Currently our life is in limbo. Hopefully, we will have some answers soon. In my heart I need to keep the faith that things will be okay.

[boyando]

Strawberry;

I do not know why I feel compelled to say "Thank You" for all that you have written and expressed in this thread.

You have made bare your soul and by doing so, have strengthened me.

You asked what is a miracle? The answer is everything that our loving Heavenly Father gives to his children. He gave us You as a beacon, showing forth, much faith and hope and charity.

My prayer is consistant, that your load may be lightened and yourspirit's lifted. Never the less, His will be done.

[StrawberryFields]

Strawberry;

I do not know why I feel compelled to say "Thank You" for all that you have written and expressed in this thread.

You have made bare your soul and by doing so, have strengthened me.

You asked what is a miracle? The answer is everything that our loving Heavenly Father gives to his children. He gave us You as a beacon, showing forth, much faith and hope and charity.

My prayer is consistant, that your load may be lightened and yourspirit's lifted. Never the less, His will be done.

I don't know what to say. I feel the Lord has blessed my family with a modern day miracle. At the very least I need to shout this from the roof tops. I believe that life in general has become very dark for many people. I believe that the Lord is giving us miracles here and there to offer hope. Without hope, what is the point of trying. Nick has touched the lives of many, and his spirit is bright.

Thank you for your comments. I feel like maybe people are tired of hearing about my life, this it has been going on for more than two years. I wished I could tell more...show more pictures, but I worry some about protecting our identity with this being the WWW.

I feel compelled to tell others of this experience as a way of expressing thanks to my Father In Heaven. Certainly this did not happen to us because we deserve this more then someone else. I feel that Nick's story might offer hope to someone who's light is weaning, if this is being done then I am happy.

[Lindy]

SF... Allmosthumble is right... you ARE an inspiration to so many. You have the courage and strength and faith that would leave many of us in the same situation. Nick is in our hearts as well as our prayers.... he is a miracle, and God willing will continue to be a miracle.

I love you for who you are , and more so for everything you are going through,

Smiles and Hugs,

L.

[john doe]

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family during these difficult times, SF. I hope things work out for the best for you.