Advice on homosexual adultery needed.


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It's a huge misconception that persons who engage in homosexual activity are paedophiles, or more likely to engage in such behaviour. I think this myth is very damaging and wrong full-stop - just because someone is attracted to someone of the same sex doesn't mean that they are a danger to kids.

Paedophilia is about control of another human being - one who is completely without power. It is about CONTROL of another, not self-control. Sex-crimes in general are about control - rape is about control, not about sexual orientation, nor about lack of self-control. Men who rape women, or children, or other men, or women who do the same, feel the need to impose/force themselves sexually on another human being to feel powerful. Sexual abuse of any kind is one of the most degrading ways that a human can treat another, more powerful than any other kind of abuse.

Stats show that 98% of child sexual abuse cases are by straight men. The other 2% consists of child-sex crimes by women and by homosexual men.

I had an aunty who is lesbian and had a number of affairs (with women) during her marriage (she ended up coming out and leaving my uncle - now the family won't have anything to do with her). She was always my favourite aunty and she was one of the most kind and caring relatives I have (she was a great mum as well), and yet it wasn't her who was a paedophile but rather her very straight husband.

This is something that really boils my blood - I am still trying to forgive him with much prayer.

And to think that over and over again people confuse sexual orientation with sexual abuse is soooo wrong! It's because of all those stupid politicians who in their attempt to stop same-sex marriage who spew their ignorant views saying that legalising same-sex relations/marriage is the same as legalising paedophilia.

Yes there are those who are gay/bi who are also paedophiles, but they are in the minority compared to massive number of paedophiles who are exclusively straight who prey on kids, whether male or female.

Edited by FunnySheila
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I have never done this before, but could really do with some advice. I'll start with a bit of background information to set the scene of the problem.

I was born into the gospel and went less active when I was 15 for a couple of years. During this time I broke the law of chastity a number of times, including with my now husband who I met and got together with when I was 18. He joined the church 5 years before we met. We had a civil ceremony in 2009 and were sealed in the temple a year later.

When we got married, I was very honest with him about the mistakes that I had made in the time when I was less active. He also confessed to me his previous transgressions as I made it clear to him that I didn't want there to be any secrets within our marriage.

As far as I was aware, we were happily married. We had our problems, but we both regularly attended the temple, served in the church and had strong testimonies. We started trying for a baby once we were sealed, but we didn't get pregnant for a while.

In May this year, my husband confessed to me that he had committed adultery, with another man. He had gone on an internet chat site and arranged to meet a random guy, who he had sexual contact with in our home whilst I was at work. This happened on new years eve, so it had taken him 6 months to tell me. He didnt tell me everything at first, it took him about a week to tell me the full story, where I then discovered that this was something that he used to do before we were married. This was the third time he had met a man and had sexual contact in this way. I was devistated.

He is going through the repentance process, and I prayed long and hard at home and at the temple about whether I should stay with him. I felt like I should try to work it out with him, so I told him that I would try. A couple of days later, I found out I was pregnant.

Since him telling me, we have moved out of the house and the city where it happened and have started over. He is waiting for the Bishop and Stake President to decide how to deal with the situation, and I am trying my best to live with him and trust him again. However he still lies to me about things. Only little things, but it really bothers me because he tells me that he is being completely honest with me and that he has nothing else to tell me, but then I find out that he has lied about more little things.

Has anyone else been in this situation? Is it possible for someone battling with homosexual tendencies to get over it and be a faithful husband? Will I ever be able to trust him again? Any experiences or advice that may help would be appreciated. Thanks.

If you are cool with it, let him do it. If not, dump him. Simple as that.
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