shawnspencer Posted January 31, 2012 Report Share Posted January 31, 2012 Okay so this is kind of a long story so buckle your seat belts. So in high school I met this girl and we were in a short lived relation ship that lasted for like six months or so. The reason we broke up is because we wanted to follow the reccomendations of the Prophet and General Athorities on not having a "relationship" that early on.(this was in my junior year). We never actually stopped feeling the same for each other and actually remained best friends. In fact it improved our friendship instead of destroying it. Recently one of my good friends (a girl) from high school told me that this other girl, lets say her name is.....uh Loren, came to her and told her some things. She apparently has not gotten over me in any possible way. I guess that she said that she feels horrible about us breaking up and that she feels still the same way about me still after three years. This blew my mind! The crazy thing is that I still feel the same way maybe even stronger about her. We are both devout LDS, active and everything. I am turning my mission papers on thursday of this week and I don't turn 19 till june 2nd so I have like five months. I am just wondering what to do! I seriously think that she might be the one. I have this strong feeling about her. She still doesn't know how I feel, for all she knows I have completely moved on by now. I want to at least let her know so she doesn't think I am not an option at all any more. But what do I do? I have prayed about it a whole lot, I have pondered on it for days. I just dont know what to do. Any advice? Thanks shawnspencer:) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jennarator Posted January 31, 2012 Report Share Posted January 31, 2012 Ask her out. Just be honest about your plans. No need for it to get too serious before a mission. Even if you have other girls writing you, you will love to get more letters from home. If things heat up, try to lkeep the cool. Don't be alone a lot and hang out in groups. Chances are she will love to write to you on your mission. If not, you have moved on and have other prospects. :) Good luck!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 31, 2012 Report Share Posted January 31, 2012 Tell her: "I love you. Hope I'll have the chance to pursue a relationship with you in 2 years. See you then." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shawnspencer Posted January 31, 2012 Author Report Share Posted January 31, 2012 Thanks, ya I really like her still, and like I said I think that she might be the one. The thing is we are both kind of shy when it comes to speaking our feelings. I want to let her know that I still feel the same about her because I feel if I dont she will think that I have just moved on then she will to. But that is the thing I haven't moved on yet, and I want her to know that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shawnspencer Posted January 31, 2012 Author Report Share Posted January 31, 2012 Thanks anatess, haha I actually really like that Idea:) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Martain Posted January 31, 2012 Report Share Posted January 31, 2012 If I were in your shoes I'd tell her how I feel and that I was going on a mission. I'd tell her that if she was still single when I returned that I intended to follow up on my feelings and court her with an intent to marry. I'd also tell her that should she find an individual and marry him while I was away, so long as she knew it was what the Lord wanted her to do, then I would be happy for her even if she wouldn't become mine. Basically, if I really love her, isn't her happiness my ultimate concern? Regardless as to whether or not I'm the man she's with, if she found someone she's happy with whom the Lord approved of, then I too would be happy safe in the knowledge that the Lord would see my sacrifice and reward me accordingly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beefche Posted January 31, 2012 Report Share Posted January 31, 2012 I wouldn't ask her out. You are turning in your mission papers and you are going to find that it is going to be HARD to keep the commandments and stay on track. Satan loves to mess with potential missionaries. What an opportunity for Satan to tempt you through this relationship. Keep it a friendship. Let her know before you leave for your mission that you do not expect her to "wait" for you (that is not fair to ask of a young lady), but that you hope to pursue a more romantic relationship upon your return. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gwen Posted January 31, 2012 Report Share Posted January 31, 2012 I would be cautious of sharing to much of your feelings prior to leaving, especially if you are sure she feels the same. Could cause some temptation over the next 5 months. 5 months is longer than you realize and a lot can happen. I would not start dating more seriously at this point. I would remain friends, talk about your mission and keep things as they are. Just before you are scheduled to leave, like week of, I would tell her (or write her a letter) explaining that you still have feelings for her that may be "more than friends" and if appropriate when you return you would like to date more seriously. She will not feel pressured to say or do anything with this new information because you are leaving so soon, it will prevent some of the awkwardness or temptation. There will be a lot of time to ponder it and both of you to grow over the next 2 yrs. See where things stand when you get home. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMGuy Posted January 31, 2012 Report Share Posted January 31, 2012 If I were in your shoes I'd tell her how I feel and that I was going on a mission. I'd tell her that if she was still single when I returned that I intended to follow up on my feelings and court her with an intent to marry. I'd also tell her that should she find an individual and marry him while I was away, so long as she knew it was what the Lord wanted her to do, then I would be happy for her even if she wouldn't become mine.Basically, if I really love her, isn't her happiness my ultimate concern? Regardless as to whether or not I'm the man she's with, if she found someone she's happy with whom the Lord approved of, then I too would be happy safe in the knowledge that the Lord would see my sacrifice and reward me accordingly.This-RM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
moronirz Posted January 31, 2012 Report Share Posted January 31, 2012 Tell her your mormon and this is what will happen in the future. Tell her to just live in the moment and whatever happens, HAPPENS! Experience is better than Ignorance. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beefche Posted January 31, 2012 Report Share Posted January 31, 2012 Tell her your mormon and this is what will happen in the future. Tell her to just live in the moment and whatever happens, HAPPENS! Experience is better than Ignorance.What do you mean by this? The girl is an active LDS girl. What do you mean to live in the moment and whatever happens, happens? Do you mean that we have no control over our lives and choices? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rameumptom Posted February 1, 2012 Report Share Posted February 1, 2012 Go ahead and begin dating her again. Only, make all dates group dates or with one of your families. That will keep your relationship safe, and you prepared for your mission. Then, she can write you through your mission, etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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