Suzie Posted August 9, 2012 Report Share Posted August 9, 2012 (edited) A friend of mine posted a picture with a new hairstyle and one person commented: "Jessie looks so beautiful. Did not recognize her at first." Edited August 9, 2012 by Suzie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annewandering Posted August 9, 2012 Report Share Posted August 9, 2012 Insult for sure but might not be intentional? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Traveler Posted August 9, 2012 Report Share Posted August 9, 2012 A friend of mine posted a picture with a new hairstyle and one person commented:"Jessie looks so beautiful. Did not recognize her at first."It depends - if the person was a business or fine arts major it was and insult - if they were a science major it was a compliment.The Traveler Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dove Posted August 9, 2012 Report Share Posted August 9, 2012 oh, ouch! That sounds like a back handed insult to me...The person writing it may have been totally oblivious to the impact of what they were saying. Still, ouch! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ctoni Posted August 9, 2012 Report Share Posted August 9, 2012 Not an insult in my opinion. You can look one way with a certain style and beautiful and then a different way with a different style and still beautiful. Think sometimes we can be too quick to take offence x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
captmoroniRM Posted August 9, 2012 Report Share Posted August 9, 2012 Depends on the context, tone, and manner in which it was delivered. Between friends, it could be a friendly jest. I've also seen people who, when they dress up, look completely different. It happens. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dravin Posted August 9, 2012 Report Share Posted August 9, 2012 (edited) A friend of mine posted a picture with a new hairstyle and one person commented:"Jessie looks so beautiful. Did not recognize her at first."As quoted that is two distinct thoughts, you have:Thought 1: Jessie looks so beautiful.Thought 2: Did not recognize her at first.Some are parsing it as, "I did not recognize her at first because she looks so beautiful." Of course the implication that "She's normally ugly." is still an exercise of the reader's. I'm with captmoroniRM though that it is going to boil down to context. Edited August 9, 2012 by Dravin Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NeuroTypical Posted August 9, 2012 Report Share Posted August 9, 2012 Life is a lot more fun when you live it in such a way to evoke such statements from folks before they realize they're making them. Sitting around trying to figure out whether someone should be offended or not? Where's the fun in that? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gwen Posted August 9, 2012 Report Share Posted August 9, 2012 That sounds like a back handed insult to me...It's a backhanded compliment.I agree with it depends on the context and person. If it's coming from someone that is known for their sarcasm and backhanded compliments then they knew exactly what they said. However, most ppl don't pay that much attention and it was probably meant and should be taken as a compliment. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pam Posted August 9, 2012 Report Share Posted August 9, 2012 Personally I'd take it as a compliment. An example of why would be: I could see a co-worker every day at work. She is very pretty. I'm used to seeing her every day in regular work attire and in a work environment. She wears minimal makeup for work. Then one day I see a picture of her where she had to dress for an occasion. She has more makeup on than I am used to seeing her wear. She is all of a sudden seen in a way that I'm not used to seeing her. So I could see myself thinking..."Wow she's beautiful. I didn't recognize her at first." It's not because she wasn't already beautiful, but it's because I was seeing her in a way that I had not before. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iggy Posted August 9, 2012 Report Share Posted August 9, 2012 I don't see it as an insult or a back handed compliment. There are a couple of sisters in my branch that seldom 'clean up'. Meaning their hair is just quick brushed back,no make up at all, their clothes could really use ironing, their shoes are dirty and worn down. Then when they do get a new Hair Do, put on a wee bit of eye brow pencil and lip gloss along with some moisturizer on the face, hands and arms (elbows mostly), iron the dress and wipe the driveway dust off the shoes- well they look like a different person. They also act like a different person. Before anyone takes offense at what I have said, continue on ~ ~ I am talking about myself too. One of the sisters was doing good just to get to church ~ she had three adult daughters with their 2/3 children each, living with her and husband for 8 months. Unfortunately she is not the type of person who makes the adult daughters clean up and do for themselves- so she was worn down to the nub. Her husband (their step-father) finally found them affordable housing and got them moved out of his home. Some of the sisters in the Branch took her to the Salon, she got a shorter cut and all of us sisters donated towards a total spa treatment. She looked like a totally different person- My excuse is I had a low grade infection (tooth) and each month it dragged me further down. To the point where I wasn't taking any of my meds, or insulin. Finally the tooth fell out (un-popped kernel of corn did the job), the infection was exposed, took medicine to clear it up and now I feel like I can conquer the world (pile of ironing at least!) Oh, wait- no comments about ironing ~ I wear cotton and it really does have to be ironed. Can not tolerate fabric that is less than 80% cotton. Garments being the only exception! I also went and got a new Do. A perm (with white, thinning hair that is a tricky one) that is just two steps this side of too tight and "Old Lady Frizzy"- I love it. I get it wet, comb (not brush) it back, then take a pick and fluff. Spray with hair spray, use clear combs to hold the sides back off my ears and I am good to go. I also resurrected the eyebrow pencil and the eyebrow guide- the moisturizer and the lip gloss. Next is to dig out the ironing board and get all of my cotton blouses, skirts and seersucker dresses ironed. To end this long missive; I received those same comments at Church last Sunday. Made my day. Of course, I am an eternal optimist anyway, so I lean to the positive side rather than the negative. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
C_T_R Posted August 9, 2012 Report Share Posted August 9, 2012 (edited) Who cares? Beauty is subjective. The few people, and I mean *few* people's opinions that matter to me are the only ones that matter to me. You think I look terrible? I. Don't. Care. Edited August 9, 2012 by C_T_R Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MorningStar Posted August 9, 2012 Report Share Posted August 9, 2012 I'm sure it was a compliment, but that did kind of come out wrong. :-D I know a lady who says stuff like, "I was driving down the street and saw you walking from behind. At first I thought, "No, she's too skinny to be her!" I once sang with her and another sister and she said, "I'm so glad I'm not singing with two skinny women." Uh, thanks? I sang while I was sick at a baptism and she said, "I was thinking, 'Does she always sing this flat?' Then I heard you coughing and knew you weren't feeling well. Oh, but you're still the best singer in the ward." She rules at compliments. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John11111 Posted August 12, 2012 Report Share Posted August 12, 2012 Sounds like a compliment to me how is it an insult o.o? Just because you didnt recognize her doesnt mean she was ugly before imo, she could have been beautiful before and still looks beautiful just not like the same person. I thought this was a joke at 1st and people responding were just messing with the op lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jerome1232 Posted August 12, 2012 Report Share Posted August 12, 2012 I could make a comment about women twisting compliments into something evil but I won't. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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