Vort Posted August 18, 2015 Author Report Share Posted August 18, 2015 Really? do you think I should talk to my bishop about it? I think you should not revel in wickedness, even if you think it's minor. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vort Posted August 18, 2015 Author Report Share Posted August 18, 2015 lol. I admit it-I don't know many Bishops, but the ones I have met have been truly wonderful people. I consider myself lucky/blessed to have met them. I have known many bishops. I agree with you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MormonGator Posted August 18, 2015 Report Share Posted August 18, 2015 I have known many bishops. I agree with you. I admire them. It's a tough job, with a lot of responsibilities. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
omegaseamaster75 Posted August 18, 2015 Report Share Posted August 18, 2015 (edited) I admire them. It's a tough job, with a lot of responsibilities. No one is saying it is not a tough job, They sacrifice their time and families for a greater good. I wouldn't want that job. I do not hold them as the final word on church policy however Edited August 18, 2015 by omegaseamaster75 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
omegaseamaster75 Posted August 18, 2015 Report Share Posted August 18, 2015 I think you should not revel in wickedness, even if you think it's minor.I am not reveling in it, far from it. I think that we all have our crosses to bear. On the sliding scale of sinning the casual viewing of the SI swimsuit edition is pretty low though. When something innocuous get elevated to a higher level than should be I take issue. Comparing SI swimsuit issue to porn; sorry that's a non starter. I can concede that if my consumption of the SI swimsuit edition leads me down a path of distance from my wife, family, failure to complete work assignments, church attendance suffering and habitual self abuse then yes I have fallen in to the perils of which our leaders have warned us of. We are asked to dominate our natural man. Think about what that means and ask yourself is you really have control of your natural man when you can't bring yourself to look at a girl in a bikini without dangerous thoughts entering your head. For some, yes they can't control themselves and SI swim suit edition should be off the reading list. I would like to think that for most its a non issue. Maybe I am wrong. When we sexualize everything we make the mundane scandalous, and the normal...I am loathe to use that word now, but we make the normal a sin. When is clearly is not. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MormonGator Posted August 18, 2015 Report Share Posted August 18, 2015 No one is saying it is not a tough job, They sacrifice their time and families for a greater good. I wouldn't want that job. I do not hold them as the final word on church policy however I know, it wasn't directed towards you Omega. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
char713 Posted August 18, 2015 Report Share Posted August 18, 2015 If what you're saying, Omega, is that you are looking at the SI women in swimsuits (or other items that cover less than your average swimsuit) simply because they are pretty, and no lustful or self-gratifying thoughts whatsoever enter your head during such viewing.. then why not avoid any risk of criticism and look at a temple dress catalog instead? Some of the ones produced by companies such as Eternity Bridal have very, very pretty models. Or any other non-lingerie catalog might do just as well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 19, 2015 Report Share Posted August 19, 2015 I only drink a little wine with my dinner on Saturdays and sometimes Tuesdays. That's cool, right? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 19, 2015 Report Share Posted August 19, 2015 "Do not look at beauty magazines, it will only make you feel ugly" - some song. "Do not look at Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition, it will only make your wife look ugly" - me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
priesthoodpower Posted August 19, 2015 Report Share Posted August 19, 2015 I have read that some LDS sisters (specifically, some along the Wasatch Front) have stated that they would prefer their husbands commit real, live, honest-to-badness, flesh-to-flesh adultery than that they view pornography. Being naive as I am, I cannot believe anyone (except maybe those who get perverse joy out of cheating husbands) would actually believe this. Am I wrong? Is there anyone other than the occasional rare nutjob who actually believes that pornography viewing -- awful though it may be -- is actually worse than adultery? Is this anything like a common belief in some areas of Mormondom? At the end of the day, I think I would prefer a spouse that looked at pornography once versus a spouse that committed adultery once. ...or are these women saying that they would rather their husband have an ongoing problem with adulteryrather then an ongoing problem with pornography? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MormonGator Posted August 19, 2015 Report Share Posted August 19, 2015 "Do not look at Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition, it will only make your wife look ugly" - me. Anatess raises a good point that I didn't think of, to be honest. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
priesthoodpower Posted August 19, 2015 Report Share Posted August 19, 2015 "Do not look at Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition, it will only make your wife look ugly" - me. My wife is the most gorgeous, prettiest, sexiest woman in the world. I am truly a lucky guy.In my struggles with porn it didnt make my wife seem any uglier, I just liked looking at other pretty women. so I hope women understand that sometimes (at least in my case) porn addiction has nothing to do with the wife not measuring up to the models, it was just a lack of strength to resist the temptation on my part. Windseeker, Saint Peter and The Folk Prophet 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Windseeker Posted August 19, 2015 Report Share Posted August 19, 2015 My wife is the most gorgeous, prettiest, sexiest woman in the world. I am truly a lucky guy.In my struggles with porn it didnt make my wife seem any uglier, I just liked looking at other pretty women. so I hope women understand that sometimes (at least in my case) porn addiction has nothing to do with the wife not measuring up to the models, it was just a lack of strength to resist the temptation on my part. Case in point - This Sports Illustrated Model's husband spent thousands of dollars each month on internet pornography (came out in divorce proceedings) ....thousands Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leah Posted August 19, 2015 Report Share Posted August 19, 2015 This is actually a shameful admission. Perhaps you should avoid stating such things. When guys try to dismiss looking at the SI swimsuit issue as "normal" and innocuous, I have to wonder if they are actually in denial or just not wanting to give up an activity they enjoy. Guys don't look at nearly-naked women in "swimsuits" because they are interested in the swimsuit. They aren't looking at the pictures because they represent an awesome moment in sports....they are looking at those pictures because they enjoy being aroused by them. It's not like a woman in a bathing suit happened to cross their line of vision - it's a deliberate seeking out and looking at a particular kind of photo. It's the same thing when women read books such as '50 Shades of Gray'. You're not reading it for the compelling plot and awesome literary skills...you're reading it to get aroused. And I do believe the church addresses that kind of behavior very specifically and very clearly. But, hey, what do our leaders know? They're just uptight prudes, right? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 19, 2015 Report Share Posted August 19, 2015 It's the same thing when women read books such as '50 Shades of Gray'. You're not reading it for the compelling plot and awesome literary skills...you're reading it to get aroused. Not to be nit-picky but women don't read smut novels to get aroused. They read it to get the gooey emotional "I'm loved" feeling - including in the bedroom where a guy says just the right lovey words and does just the right deeds to make the woman feel like a Disney princess (well, the old damsels in distress princesses - not this new-fangled I'm the one doing the saving princesses). It's not a physical thing but an emotional thing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vort Posted August 19, 2015 Author Report Share Posted August 19, 2015 Not to be nit-picky but women don't read smut novels to get aroused. They read it to get the gooey emotional "I'm loved" feeling - including in the bedroom where a guy says just the right lovey words and does just the right deeds to make the woman feel like a Disney princess (well, the old damsels in distress princesses - not this new-fangled I'm the one doing the saving princesses). It's not a physical thing but an emotional thing. Not sure whether I buy into this. But whether or not it's true, a crispier version of dog poop is still dog poop. Leah 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MormonGator Posted August 19, 2015 Report Share Posted August 19, 2015 Lady Gator and I were talking about this thread last night, and she made a good point. If you start justifying sinful behavior as "no big deal" it makes it easier to slide into even worse behavior down the road. No, I'm not trying to equate looking at a swimsuit issue with robbing a bank or assault, but if you brag about looking at a swimsuit issue or watching a porno movie, it makes it easier to slide further down the road of sin. Just some thoughts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Windseeker Posted August 19, 2015 Report Share Posted August 19, 2015 My wife is the most gorgeous, prettiest, sexiest woman in the world. I am truly a lucky guy.In my struggles with porn it didnt make my wife seem any uglier, I just liked looking at other pretty women. so I hope women understand that sometimes (at least in my case) porn addiction has nothing to do with the wife not measuring up to the models, it was just a lack of strength to resist the temptation on my part. I was thinking about this after I posted in agreement and gave an example of Christi Brinkley. I thought about how women think and realize men just think differently. If we truly understand our women we would realize that our actions speak louder than words. I'm sure to Christi Brinkley she didn't look at it like "wow..I'm one of the most beautiful woman in the world, this guy really has a problem" but rather "I'm not pretty enough, good enough to satisfy my spouse". What I'm saying is that even if a wife know's on some level she's beautiful, it's meaningless when her man, the person that matters most, is obsessed with lusting over other women. Because there are various degrees of perversion I can understand how a spouse might prefer adultery to certain forms of pornography. As a man, even I would expect a spouse would prefer adultery to the viewing of child pornography or violent pornography. But perhaps to women, sports illustrated vs hardcore pornography is a distinction without a difference. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 19, 2015 Report Share Posted August 19, 2015 Child pornography is a whole different beast, and 100% a dealbreaker in my mind. On that subject, Subway's famous Jared was arrested yesterday on several child pornography charges. I'd be willing to bet a few sandwiches that he started with seemingly innocent, softcore porn, and developed an addiction that led to perversion. On the subject of literary girl porn, I do know at least one person who now says she "needs" it to be able to go to bed with her husband. So anatess can't speak for her, at least. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
omegaseamaster75 Posted August 19, 2015 Report Share Posted August 19, 2015 On the subject of literary girl porn, I do know at least one person who now says she "needs" it to be able to go to bed with her husband. So anatess can't speak for her, at least. Her husband must be a real ogre Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 19, 2015 Report Share Posted August 19, 2015 He's actually a very nice, well-kept, good looking guy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
char713 Posted August 19, 2015 Report Share Posted August 19, 2015 Eowyn is completely right. Women can get to the point of sexual dysfunction as a result of prolonged pornography use, I'm guessing maybe even more easily than men. It comes when you and your own imagination (the porn) are able to satisfy your own needs in a way that no real partner, no matter how attentive or full of "prowess" can match. In novels, as porn for women, there doesn't even need to be a suitably attractive actor to fill the role as there is in video porn. The words - and the reader's imagination - supply everything, making it in many ways worse and more addictive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 19, 2015 Report Share Posted August 19, 2015 I can't speak for all women, of course. I can only speak as a writer. I was the school editor of my high school and college papers and we had free rides to several writing conferences. Conferences had romance novels writers section - and the take-away from the conferences was... you write to touch the woman's emotion. So, a tall, dark, and handsome billionaire can be made the most loved or the most hated person in the book depending on how he invokes a woman's emotion. So, being tall, dark, and handsome with flat-board stomach and lots of money will have to be a guy who takes care of his woman while invoking a sense of getting influenced by the woman... then he'll be the most loved character. The same exact profile but someone who doesn't show care for his woman and even goes so far as being cruel to them is going to be the most hated character. You can use these characters against each other to make the female reader even feel more deeply for one character or the other, thereby selling the book farther. You can even make the exact same character have warring traits - like the Bridge of Madison County - have a guy who cares deeply for woman but he's a guy who has no problems getting jiggy with a married woman - as long as the cares deeply side supercedes the other and it would still sell the book. 50 Shades is a perfect example - a bad guy that sold books because the guy took care of the woman and triggered the "savior" complex on female readers... so much so that even women who do not care for smut - especially bdsm smut - got sucked into reading the book. Writing page after page after page of smut without an emotional connection is not gonna sell you a book... as evidenced by book sales of the same popular smut novel authors who write sequels that are not as good as the original story.... and as evidenced by the very small percentage of women who watch porn videos versus those who read smut novels. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
omegaseamaster75 Posted August 19, 2015 Report Share Posted August 19, 2015 He's actually a very nice, well-kept, good looking guy. Which goes to show we don;t know what goes on behind closed doors. The fact that she has to prime her self in order to be intimate with her husband speaks volumes Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 19, 2015 Report Share Posted August 19, 2015 Yeah, it says she has a porn problem. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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