Bini Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 Last night one of my SIL's posted a questionable image of herself in the bathtub on Facebook. To clarify, the image wasn't indecent but at first glance it was difficult to make out what exactly it was. I had commented, "At first I had no idea WHAT I was looking at! But now I see :)." From my own conclusion, the image was a partial shot of the top of her knee caps submerging from the tub water. Shortly after another family member posted, "Yeah I couldn't tell what it was either! It looks like a butt! LOL." Although I admit that comment was a bit amusing, I didn't respond to the post again.Later that night a very upset message popped up on my phone. It said something to the effect of, "Sorry I'm fat. I guess everything on me looks like butt." I immediately felt terrible. First off, that totally was not what my mind was thinking! My initial reaction was.. Hmm.. That's a rather risque cleavage shot.. The image has since been removed and all comments along with it. But the miscommunication still lingers, and obviously, my SIL is having some hurt feelings. My relationship with her is mostly over Fb and text messages. So after giving her some time, I guess I ought to shoot her an apology for her misunderstanding.Anyone else been in a situation like this with another woman? The whole thing feels so.. dramatic. Disputes with male family members are never "intense" like this, ever. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 You're not the one that said she looked like a butt. I would just reply to her text message that it wasn't you who said it. Maybe she got your name mixed up with somebody else's post. Here's my family drama protocol: Stay above the fray. I don't engage. I apologize if I made a mistake and let the bricks fall where they may. I've had my share of people not talking to me, including my parents, but I find that if I just continue to love and act like I normally would, it will eventually die down and they would eventually start talking to me again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wingnut Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 She posts a picture of her naked body parts and then gets upset when someone talks about her butt? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vort Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 Sometimes I'm very, very glad I'm a man. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 There is a LOT of drama and discord in my husband's family. Every ounce of it has to do with the women. A lot of it has to do with Facebook. She's being sensitive. But having body image issues (which, along with things like common sense, would prevent me from e v e r posting a picture like that, but I digress. . .), I can understand where her hurt feelings come from. In your position, I'd tell her straight out, "I said what I did because I thought that was cleavage, not your knees. I'm sorry for the misunderstanding." And then drop it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annewandering Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 I am confused how cleavage can be confused with posteriors. Waes she doing a Rosemary twist of the head? If it were me I would be more embarrassed at having posted a bathtub photo. What in the world was she thinking? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 I am confused how cleavage can be confused with posteriors. Waes she doing a Rosemary twist of the head? If it were me I would be more embarrassed at having posted a bathtub photo. What in the world was she thinking?And while we're on this topic, my niece put a picture of her nekked 3 year old daughter going potty with her face all scrunched up in concentration. She thought it was cute. I thought it was - just wait until she turns 16 and somebody sends that picture on a text message to the entire school...I guess it's like God looking at us doing all these temporal things shaking His head because we just can't think of the eternal perspective. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annewandering Posted November 13, 2012 Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 These things just make me cringe. There are truly sick people out there who love to find those 'silly' to us photos of kids. Better to not have them fulfill their sick fantasies with our kids. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bini Posted November 13, 2012 Author Report Share Posted November 13, 2012 I am confused how cleavage can be confused with posteriors. Waes she doing a Rosemary twist of the head? If it were me I would be more embarrassed at having posted a bathtub photo. What in the world was she thinking?It was neither cleavage nor posterior but knees. The picture was taken in a way that was not clear to the observer. At first glance, they really did look like boobs and apparently, also looked like buttocks to someone else.I haven't apologised but the more I think on it, I'm not sure I really need to. But I totally agree, don't post stuff on Fb unless you're prepared for commentators with sometimes distasteful comments. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FunkyTown Posted November 15, 2012 Report Share Posted November 15, 2012 I would suggest you say something sensitive to her hurt feelings that shows you are supportive, and didn't support the comment about the butt. Something like, "Whoah, whoah, whoah! Let's take a left on to reality boulevard before we get too far in to crazytown. What are you talking about and who said you were fat?" People who are sensitive love to be called on their crazy. It shows them you care enough to listen closely to them and understand what they're saying is crazy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suzie Posted November 16, 2012 Report Share Posted November 16, 2012 At first glance, they really did look like boobs and apparently, also looked like buttocks to someone else.Sounds like some people were expressing what they had ummmm.... in mind. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just_A_Guy Posted November 16, 2012 Report Share Posted November 16, 2012 And while we're on this topic, my niece put a picture of her nekked 3 year old daughter going potty with her face all scrunched up in concentration. She thought it was cute. I thought it was - just wait until she turns 16 and somebody sends that picture on a text message to the entire school...The heck with that - wait until someone reports her for distributing "child porn" and the Feds come a'calling. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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