Greetings Programs

[RHawkins6]

My name is Richard Hawkins I am from the UK, I have been a member of the church for 6 years and was diagnosed with epilepsy about 8 years ago. I am a very shy and reserved person and have always found church very difficult as i am not very comfortable in social environments. This has resulted in Sunday being the most lonely day for me, sitting alone with no one saying more than an unfeeling "how are you?" often not waiting for my reply before moving on. Due to my epilepsy and the distance to my ward (15 miles) or my stake (50+ miles) I am unable to attend activities and have never been home taught in all the time i have been a member. My present home teacher is at church each week and is always too busy with family to even speak to me.

That first paragraph may have seemed like a bit of a rant but it was something i had to make clear at first, in case people wonder why i might seem so down. My faith is strong but i am at my wits end concerning the other things in my life. I know this is not the best introduction and this area of the forum is not really the place for answering such concerns but i felt i should introduce myself thoroughly.

As people maybe able to tell from my Thread title i am a quite a geek and proud of that, I enjoy movies, programming, gaming, modding. I collect swords and antiques and have a wide range of hobbies,etc which i do to keep me busy during the day while i search for a new job.

[skalenfehl]

Yes-yes-yes!

Edited November 25, 2012 by skalenfehl

[Sister_N]

Welcome to the forum.

I am also in the UK, and have epilepsy (though mine is controlled enough that I am able to hold a drivers licence)

I know where you are coming from with people being distant at Church, I had this for a long time (even harder in a small insular branch) It came to a point where I decided if others weren't going to make the effort then I needed to, and it seems to work most of the time :)

[pam]

Welcome to the site Richard.

[georgia2]

Hi Richard, you will certainly have lots of people to talk to here!!

It's easy to feel alone and isolated at church when you are already feeling that way. It's also easy looking around seeing everyone else busy with their own concerns. Sometimes it helps to imagine yourself In the other guys shoes. Your home teacher has a family to teach, discipline, keep quiet, and callings to live up to and fulfill. If you were him, would you like a person you are responsible for to reach out and shake your hand while giving a big grin and how do you do?? Did you know that you can have a visit right there at church?? You could let him know you would like to get to know him a bit more and appreciate having him as your home teacher. The most important aspect is knowing who to call when you have a need for a blessing, a concern, problem, or help with something.

You could ask the Elders Quorum President if there are any other members who live closer to you. Maybe you could be a companion home teacher to someone who lives close and build a friendship there as well as develop your spirituality, get to know other members and feel good about serving Heavenly Father.

People don't purposely walk by you. Latter Day Saints tend to be very busy people and have a lot to get done in the few hours they are at church. When you look at it that way and realize YOU will be a blessing to them by being friendly and helpful, it makes it easier to approach them. Look around for others who are new or visiting and make sure they feel welcomed. You will find YOU are the one who makes them feel special and loved!

[Sonagolese]

Hello and welcome, Richard. My wife suffers from PTSD and uses a service dog. After checking with our bishop, we found that she is able to take her service dog to church. She isn't a church member, but goes with me on occasion to attend the sacrament service. Have you looked into service dogs for people suffering from epilepsy?

[alanjones10]

Loneliness is something i struggle with, but i have learned to realize that it isn't the fault of the church members, or others. it is a combination of circumstances beyond anyone's control, and my lack of know how to handle it better. I am sure you don't want advice, you would prefer that someone near you offers to drop by, and that would be great. but for many of us, and us who also feel alone, it may not be possible. I suggest you find some activity in the church that you can get involved with. For instance, in my case I became a licensed ham radio operator. I use it from home to help with the church's emergency preparedness practices and would help in a real emergency. It gives me a conduit to make more friends in church from my home. I am not saying that is for you, but the idea is a sound one. Find something you can like or learn to like by way of an activity or function in the church. And be sure to tell your church leaders, quorum leaders, bishopric, etc. how isolated you feel, they too may be able to help but don't leave all the responsibility on their heads. Oh my, i had intended not to give any advice and here i did. sorry. I have health issues, not the same as yours, i am on the other side of the pond, but i am single and alone, and can understand where you are coming from. May God bless you my new friend. Alan