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ShellieB

What on earth am I doing wrong???

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Hi, My name is Shellie and this is my first post. I am so happy to find this forum. I have a question that I am having a hard time resolving.

I am a convert (1995) and have basically integrated the gospel into my life. I do my best to do what I should. I have 5 children, 2 of which (girls-identical twins) are serving missions. Ashley left for her mission August of this year and Alexis left in September of this year.

Starting almost exactly a year ago today, started a year long experience of various health problems. One after another. First a shoulder surgery, then 2 days after I was discharged from PT, I had a high ankle sprain which left me non-weight bearing on it for 6 weeks and severe pain for the next 5 months. The ankle healed and I was fine for a few weeks, then I had appendicitis and an appendectomy. I was healing quickly from the surgery, I felt pretty good after the second day. On the 4th day after the surgery, I began having very severe pelvic pain. I was in the emergency room at least 3 times with pain and nothing was found. I went to several drs and no one knew what was wrong. I was literally disabled with pain for about 3 months before we found out what was wrong. It turned out to be an autoimmune disorder that was attacking the lining of my bladder. I am being treated for that and am doing much better. Now the latest is another broken tooth (the 3rd this year). The broken tooth isn't as serious as the other conditions, but this time it was different. The shot the dr gave me paralyzed the whole left side of my face. I couldn't hear out of my left ear or breathe out of the left side of my nose either. The movement in my face has returned but now I have alot of pressure in my eyeball.

I have done my best to remain positive and not commiserate about it. I just go on living life dealing with these health problems the best I can.

Here is my question. My patriarchal blessing says that I will be healthy from the top of my head to the bottom of my feet and all my organs and systems will work as they should.

What am I doing wrong? I am doing my best to live the gospel. I am not perfect, but I am striving towards it. The only thing I can figure is I am not doing something right because I was promised health in my blessing. I thought the blessing was contingent upon walking the straight and narrow. I don't understand. I refuse to believe that my blessing is wrong, so therefore the problem lies with me. I am not angry at all, or even depressed about it. I just don't understand. Please help me understand.

Thank you,

Shellie

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Guest LiterateParakeet

Hello Shellie! Welcome to the forum. Sounds like you have had a difficult year, sorry to hear that.

My best guess about your question, is my theory that sometimes we suffer from miscommunication with Heavenly Father. We think He means one thing, when He means something else.

For example, there is a scripture in the D&C that says that if we don't forgive then we have the greater sin. But what if the sin is molestation/incest? Does not forgiving the person that molested you make you worse than a molestor? My Relief Society president says if we subsitute the word "burden" for sin, then that scripture makes more sense. I like that interpretation.

The point is I think sometimes we misinterpret the words of God. Forgive me for asking but have you prayed and asked Heavenly Father if your interpretation of the words in your patriarchal blessing is correct? (Sorry, if you already thought of that.)

This probably doesn't help, but welcome to the forum!

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I don't have any insight to your patriarchal blessing, but I do know a little bit about what you are going through. I have had four knee surgeries in the past 20 months. I have gone from being extremely active to barely being able to walk. Ever time I receive some news, it is beyond horrible. I feel like there is such a dark cloud hanging over me! I've always been an extremely positive and happy person but I'm ready to shout-- enough already!!! :). So hang in there! Our circumstances are different but somewhat similar. Good luck!

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It sounds like as these maladies come up, you have been able to be accurately diagnosed and treated, and as of yet nothing has been chronic or life-changing. Your body is still mortal and as such will experience unpleasant things, but I'd say you are being blessed with health.

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Sometimes we misread out PBs. Very few go through life without some injuries or disease. It may well be that there is a fulfillment in the PB during the resurrection, when you will be complete from head to toe.

My PB states I will be protected on the highways. And generally, I have been. But there have been a few accidents along the way that left me bruised and banged up. We have to be careful not to read any prophecy in the wrong way: and we all do it.

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I presume that if you were doing anything "wrong" you would know it. Consider setting up an appointment with your Stake President to have him review your blessing with you. One of the things they are charged with is to make sure that a particular patriarchal blessing has not already been fulfilled. It's rare, but sometimes they are fulfilled in this mortal life and a person needs to get a new one. If that is not your case, at least he may be able to help you see a different interpretation based on the whole context.

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Sometimes we misread out PBs. Very few go through life without some injuries or disease. It may well be that there is a fulfillment in the PB during the resurrection, when you will be complete from head to toe.

My PB states I will be protected on the highways. And generally, I have been. But there have been a few accidents along the way that left me bruised and banged up. We have to be careful not to read any prophecy in the wrong way: and we all do it.

I don't necessarily disagree, but the problem with this sort of interpretation is that it renders the blessing effectively meaningless.

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I think that sometimes we also look at promised blessings as being immediate or throughout our lives. You were promised health, but did your blessing specify that it would be for every day of your life or from that day on? It could very well be referring to some time in the future.

In my blessing I was promised that I would find an eternal companion who would take me to the temple. It took 9 years for that blessing to come true (and I was already in my 20's when I received the blessing, so that 9 years felt like an eternity!). Sometimes we need to remember that blessings come in the Lord's time and way.

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One of the things they are charged with is to make sure that a particular patriarchal blessing has not already been fulfilled. It's rare, but sometimes they are fulfilled in this mortal life and a person needs to get a new one. If that is not your case, at least he may be able to help you see a different interpretation based on the whole context.

Wow, is that true? I have never come across that before.

Mormonmama : Sometimes we need to remember that blessings come in the Lord's time and way. Bingo

Edited by Drpepper

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ShellieB,

I don't think you are doing anything wrong. I think we all have to go through trials. Maybe your blessing means that ultimately, in the end, you will have health, rather than meaning you will never have bad health at times. Keep doing what you must spiritually, maybe learn some things about health and the body to keep it in the best health possible (do you need multivitamin, calcium, vitamin D, magnesium, omega-3's or some other thing that will help improve what you are getting normally?) and know that going through trials makes you strong. Maybe part of your trial is to make sure that your faith doesn't waiver, given what is said in your blessing. I have a cousin who married young and his wife died of cancer after only a few years of marriage. Her blessing talked of children. Needless to say, she knew that she would have children after the 2nd coming when she had her resurrected body. She actually had to go through an abortion of her pregnancy because of the harsh chemo she was going through which of course broker her heart, but it didn't discourage her despite what her patriarchal blessing said. Whether in this life, or the next...sometimes the blessing can be interpreted one way but in reality mean another.

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Perhaps it meant spiritually or emotionally healthy and not physically healthy in your blessing...

Never associate physical success with spiritual. St. Francis of Assissi was afflicted with horrible health problems his entire life, but often spoke with Jesus face to face.

Often illnesses remind us that life on earth is temporary and they are an opportunity to prepare ourselves for eternity.

That said, it sounds like a large build up of urea and mineral salts in the blood, try a meat free diet for a while and see if that helps, most animal proteins put too much in the blood and between meals containing it you need several days to flush it out.

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I don't necessarily disagree, but the problem with this sort of interpretation is that it renders the blessing effectively meaningless.

I can see how it could seem this way, but I disagree. I think it means we have to pray for the interpretation that God wants us to know at that time in our lives. The amazing thing is that with the spirit to help us, the exact same words can come to mean something different depending on where we are in life and what we're going through.

To the OP: My thought is that Heavenly Father must have known that you would go through these many health challenges and the words in your blessing were given to you so that you could go back and read them during this time and find comfort in the fact that they will one day be true.

I'm reminded of a story of a man who was promised many daughters and then had something like 7 sons and not a single daughter. When he was old, though, and he had 7 daughter-in-laws and numerous grand daughters and great grand daughters, he said that his blessing had come true. I don't think we have to wait for it to happen to see the true meaning, though - I think the spirit can help us see it, unless not knowing is part of our test I suppose.

My blessing tells me that my children will be with me in the celestial kingdom. I used to think that meant that I wouldn't have problems with wayward children, but I've actually come to think that maybe one or more of my kids will go seriously astray and that the words in my blessing will be there to comfort me during that time, however long it lasts - to the end of my days, even.

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I'm reminded of a story of a man who was promised many daughters and then had something like 7 sons and not a single daughter. When he was old, though, and he had 7 daughter-in-laws and numerous grand daughters and great grand daughters, he said that his blessing had come true. I don't think we have to wait for it to happen to see the true meaning, though - I think the spirit can help us see it, unless not knowing is part of our test I suppose.

I think this is the talk your referring to.

Speeches

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