Mission Question

[gem2477]

With new mission rules coming out, maybe other changes will happen. I would think it'd be nice to be able to call family and be able to unwind with music / tv / books at the end of a long day. Having missionaries do more service would be positive, too.

I think those types of changes would be welcome to our adult missionary volunteers paying their way to go.

[Vort]

If you are talking about young adult missionaries, the changes you suggest will never be implemented.

If you are talking about retired couple missionaries, I'm pretty sure they already have permission to listen to music and media, call the kids, and so forth.

[gem2477]

If you are talking about young adult missionaries, the changes you suggest will never be implemented.

If you are talking about retired couple missionaries, I'm pretty sure they already have permission to listen to music and media, call the kids, and so forth.

senior missionaries can? wow.

that's troubling if those rules won't change. they are adults.

[Guest]

They aren't forced to go or to follow the rules, but there are good reasons for those rules and blessings for keeping them.

[dahlia]

Someone want to point me to a discussion of new missionary rules? Is this something in addition to the statements that came out a few months ago?

[Guest]

senior missionaries can? wow.

that's troubling if those rules won't change. they are adults.

Why is it troubling?

[gem2477]

Why is it troubling?

because these things would help missionaries well being.

and because they are adults.

[gem2477]

They aren't forced to go or to follow the rules, but there are good reasons for those rules and blessings for keeping them.

well, there is pressure. a ton of it. both on the mission and before.

I've never been blessed for obeying non-sensical rules. if threre were a reason, senior couples would have those same rules.

[Dravin]

and because they are adults.

I don't see how that's relevant, none of the rules, to my knowledge, are predicated on missionaries being minors.

[pam]

because these things would help missionaries well being.

and because they are adults.

Actually I think it would do totally the opposite. It puts things of the world in place when they should be focusing on the Lord's work.

[Vort]

that's troubling if those rules won't change. they are adults.

Nope. Doesn't trouble me in the slightest.

[dahlia]

So, at the risk of losing my recommend, here are my thoughts. The missionaries work hard. In a lot of places, not only do they have to put up with people who don't want to deal with them (and are nasty about it), but have bad weather, outdoors a lot, walking, bad food, etc.

My feeling has always been that when they come to my house, or when I take them out to eat, that's their time to relax. I enjoy hearing about where they're from, what they do in their home towns or their career plans, etc. I let them practice their lessons on me, and I played the kind of music I like during the meal. I figured if they were in a foreign country and the person wanted to play their native music, the missionaries would never tell them not to, well, rock n' roll is my native music and it's my house. I would make a playlist and choose songs without outright drug or sex lyrics.

I make them Easter bags, Christmas presents, and bring little treats. I buy groceries - the right kind of food, not the garbage they usually eat - so that they can keep their health.

Tonight we had our ward dinner and trunk or treat. As everyone was leaving the parking lot, I noticed our 5 elders hanging around the door. I went up to say goodbye and asked how much candy they'd gotten. Well, turns out they'd been cleaning up and didn't get any candy. Fortunately, I still had a ton left (the Lord works in mysterious ways), and was able to give each a big handful. I guess that's terrible. Maybe I should have made them say a prayer and give e lesson on the evils of sugar.

You can't be 'on' all the time. No wonder some of these kids crack. I don't know, y'all. They're in the same age as college kids who commit suicide due to perceived pressure. I'd just rather they relaxed with me. There's plenty of time for work and prayer.

[skippy740]

well, there is pressure. a ton of it. both on the mission and before.

I've never been blessed for obeying non-sensical rules. if threre were a reason, senior couples would have those same rules.

"Non-sensical" rules?

1) Just because they are adults doesn't mean that they are all equally strong on their own. Homesickness can be a problem... and calling home won't necessarily help.

2) There are reasons behind every rule. They are either to keep missionaries safe (such as not swimming), to avoid temptation, or to help keep their focus where it needs to be - which is on the Lord's work. Basically, at some point, someone BROKE the rule before it was a rule... so they made it a rule.

3) Missionary life is highly structured. Structured minds with structured schedules help missionaries to focus on what they need. That means rules, study, and schedules to keep.

Your comparison to Senior missionary couples is ill-founded. Why? Because FAMILIES are CENTRAL to the plan... and with senior missionaries, their posterity is actually MORE important than their actual mission calling. Their rules are also more relaxed because they are serving with the ETERNAL companion. They bring a unique spirit to the missionary service that is extremely beneficial. In short, they don't NEED the rules in order to keep their focus where it needs to be.

And since I just gave the lesson on this two weeks ago:

Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Lorenzo Snow Chapter 19: Missionary Work: “To Reach Every Human Heartâ€

[skippy740]

because these things would help missionaries well being.

and because they are adults.

Based on what?

[skippy740]

With new mission rules coming out, maybe other changes will happen. I would think it'd be nice to be able to call family and be able to unwind with music / tv / books at the end of a long day. Having missionaries do more service would be positive, too.

I think those types of changes would be welcome to our adult missionary volunteers paying their way to go.

Missionary work is not like going away to school. It is a unique fraternity that one can only hope to experience in its fullest.

Calling family 2x per year is good enough.

Unwind with music? Sure. But it has to be music that is conductive to the Spirit. (Most missions always approve the Mormon Tabernacle Choir... and some missions allow LDS artists.) Basically, it's up to the Mission President.

Personal note: I had a companion that liked a heavy-metal type of music... and because he rationalized that it was 'approved'... I had to endure it. I wouldn't want that experience on anyone else.

Books? Of course. There is the missionary library as well as the scriptures. But usually at the end of a productive day, I just wanted my bed.

TV? No television or computers are allowed in missionary rooms. Why? Do I have to mention it? Sure. Television shows are a distraction enough, let alone what can be done on a computer.

Missionary service work is done and approved at the direction of the Mission President. I did 4 hours per week as a missionary.

Just because someone is paying to serve doesn't mean they get special treatment.

I know I'm riling up on these, but I think you have a problem with your testimony of the missionary program and how it is put together. Or you're feeling sorry that missionary work seems to be a 'burden'?

So far, the only missionary standards that are being reviewed are dress standards - to allow a more relaxed attire, such as khaki's (if I'm remembering the broadcast correctly). Nothing about extra-curricular activities.

Edited October 25, 2013 by skippy740

[Guest]

dahlia, I don't read of any broken rules there.

[Quin]

Just because one is an adult, does not mean that one does not, can not, or should not follow rules.

I joined the military out of highschool.

I was an adult.

The rules THERE are so extensive, there's an entire code. Specifically, the UCMJ, or Uniform Code of Military Justice.

Which is radically different than civilian rules.

Here are just a handful of examples:

My fingernails could not be more than 1/5th of an inch past the nail bed

If I were to oversleep I could be fined $1000 and sent to jail for 30 days

If I got black eye (or broken ribs, hickey, etc.) I could be charged with "damaging government property"

My hair could not be longer than my collar OR had to be confined above my collar (no fly aways, no hair bands or clips showing... One has to wrap a section of their hair over their ponytail holder. Oh. No ponytails. Highlights, eccentric colors, shaved areas, appearance of multiple braids... The list goes on. The hair & hygiene rules are actually reeeeeally long.)

No blue pens

Cannot go more than a certain number of miles off base (distance changes with weekend, 72, 96, etc.)

Cannot wear BDUs off base

Cannot call in sick (must get dressed, perfectly in uniform, and report to formation & then medical and only THEN can you go home and throw up in sweats)

Hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of rules.

That millions of adults choose to adhere to.

In order to serve their country.

Missionaries choose to adhere to a far less strict set of rules in order to serve their church.

Being an adult isn't a get out of jail free card.

The stakes raise, not lower.

Q

[Quin]

dahlia, I don't read of any broken rules there.

Dahlia... DITTO Eowyn!!!

[Dravin]

Calling family 2x per year is good enough.

It should be noted that missionaries, in addition to the biannual calls, are in contact with their families on a weekly basis via email/letters.

Missionary service work is done and approved at the direction of the Mission President. I did 4 hours per week as a missionary.

On top of that I didn't know any missionaries who refused spontaneous service opportunities, such as seeing someone struggling to get a refrigerator out of the back of a truck and offering a spot of help, on the basis of service hours. I actually struggled a lot of times trying to get in those hours because a lot of people figure it is a psychological trick to make them feel beholden to us. All part of a plot to manipulate them into the font through a sense of obligatory reciprocation.

Of all the things mentioned though, the idea of more service hours doesn't make me raise an eyebrow. I'd say leave that up to the Mission President though (who probably already has that latitude to a certain degree).

Books? Of course. There is the missionary library as well as the scriptures. But usually at the end of a productive day, I just wanted my bed.

On my mission we were able to approve books (spiritually focused ones of course) by asking the mission president. If it was spiritually uplifting and and would help a missionary focus on the work he'd approve it. This generally turned out to be books from GAs and the like that were member gifts or loans (who wants to carry an extended library with them from area to area?). The latitude the mission president has to clarify and adjust mission rules can't be neglected in conversations like this one.

TV? No television or computers are allowed in missionary rooms. Why? Do I have to mention it? Sure. Television shows are a distraction enough, let alone what can be done on a computer.

One could probably get permission to watch some videos on P-day (The Restoration, The Testaments*, Joseph Smith: Prophet of the Restoration, etc.), but as you suggest if you want to sell this as an end of day decompression activity that means computers and TVs inside of the apartment or inside of the rooms the missionaries are using if they are staying with members.

*We actually watched The Testaments as a holiday evening district meeting. I can't remember if it was for New Years Eve or Halloween.

Edited October 25, 2013 by Dravin

[Guest]

dahlia, I don't read of any broken rules there.

We were told by our ward mission leader that we should be careful when having missionaries at our house that we only play spiritually uplifting music and church-distributed videos at home and to be sure to send them home by 8:30pm. They made a special announcement in RS.

I'm not sure what kind of rock-and-roll music dahlia played but to be safe, I only play classical music or new age instrumentals or motab or those hymns cd's when they're here.

[Dravin]

dahlia, I don't read of any broken rules there.

It should be noted there are quite a few opportunities for decompression and lightheartedness on a mission. P-Day is a big one but to a lesser degree things like family dinners (it depends on the family of course*), district meetings, and those conversations that pop up either inter-missionary or intra-missionary. All of these things don't break the rules, all of these things can be sources of appropriate decompression.

*Some, like Dahlia, want to relate to the missionaries as people who have a purpose of sharing the gospel. Sometimes it felt like others want to relate to the missionaries almost as if they are an abstract concept, Missiontron 3000s, you know, the ones that complain because when asked if they like sports the missionary actually volunteered the information that they like BYU football and hope they do well this year.

You can't be 'on' all the time.

I've never met a missionary on my mission that was (I suppose it depends on what you mean by on all the time). Off my mission I've met plenty who most definitely weren't 'on' all the time, and a few who seemed that way but all that says is they were on while around me, the person who is only around them an extremely small portion of their week. I'm simply not there to verify if they are on all the time, really the only person who is in a position to make a call like that is their companions, possibly their districts.

@Peanut Gallery (in other words a general comment): I find that those who seem to worry most that missionaries are 'on' all the time with no opportunities to decompress in appropriate ways tend to be those who haven't been a missionary or haven't worked closely with them (such as Mission Presidencies, Senior Missionaries, and proactive Ward Mission Leaders).

Edited October 25, 2013 by Dravin

[Guest]

An interesting note about recent mission rule changes: I got a FB message from my missionary nephew the other day. He's in WA DC waiting for his visa to Brazil. He sent me a message asking if there was anyone on FB he could teach with me over PM. I told him I would think about it, and noted how weird it was to hear from a missionary on FB! He did say that's pretty much the only website he's allowed to use, and for proselyting only. They do so with their companion (and someone else I think?) monitoring what they're doing. In fact, his mom wrote on his wall that she loved him and asked how he was doing, and he was required to erase it because it wasn't mission related.

[Guest]

An interesting note about recent mission rule changes: I got a FB message from my missionary nephew the other day. He's in WA DC waiting for his visa to Brazil. He sent me a message asking if there was anyone on FB he could teach with me over PM. I told him I would think about it, and noted how weird it was to hear from a missionary on FB! He did say that's pretty much the only website he's allowed to use, and for proselyting only. They do so with their companion (and someone else I think?) monitoring what they're doing. In fact, his mom wrote on his wall that she loved him and asked how he was doing, and he was required to erase it because it wasn't mission related.

All the missionaries that have been assigned to our ward this year have FB accounts. It's really cool because we have several missionaries that have taught an investigator and then moved to a different area. The investigator still gets spiritual messages (usually links to conference talks with a short comment from the missionary) from the missionary through FB. All the missionaries from our ward are on it too, except the one assigned to South Africa. So we get their spiritual messages on a weekly basis. Our ward has a FB group thing and all these missionaries are all members of it. So, one missionary sends a message and everybody in our ward gets it through the group. So, in a sense, we haven't lost contact with any of the missionaries from our ward or was assigned to our ward and has since transferred. Their FB accounts usually start with Elder or Sister so and so... and their profile pic shows them in their mission clothes with name tags.

Really cool beans.

Edited October 25, 2013 by anatess

[gem2477]

I don't see how that's relevant, none of the rules, to my knowledge, are predicated on missionaries being minors.

The point is why are the telling an adult that they can't talk to their family? Can't an adult have enough faculty to know if what they are doing is inhibiting their missionary work themselves?

[gem2477]

Actually I think it would do totally the opposite. It puts things of the world in place when they should be focusing on the Lord's work.

So you are saying breaks are not necessary for well-being? Or to help you perform better in your work?