Cursing and Cussing at work...


EarlJibbs
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Guest LiterateParakeet

This topic reminds me of the movie Signs with Mel Gibson.  Anyone remember that?  When Gibson's character and his brother went outside to try and scare away any intruders.  Too funny.  Gibson's substitute bad language made him look pretty silly in that moment.  :P

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I don't know Iggy. "Pretty much lose my respect forever" seems harsh, but you do as you please for sure.

 

When I get people one on one, they tend not to swear at all around me. It is in those times where we generally end up talking about the gospel and our religion (comes up from them). I definitely don't lose any respect, since in those times where they are cussing up a storm, I see someone that would make a great Primary Leader or some other function in the church.

 

Now if I heard an active faithful member of the church using that kind of language, sure I'd lose respect at that time. But not for those that have not made the same promises as I have. I cannot hold them to the same standard.

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Language is a habit.

 

If you make saying, "Like..." a habit, it can be really hard to stop saying it even after you've amassed a library of congress worth of vocabulary words...

 

And the habit is formed usually through association.  You know you went to high school in the last 10 years because you say, "Like..." a lot.   Kids of the 80's don't speak like that.

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EarlJibbs, I prefer to surround myself with good, positive feelings, language, music. My first husband was evil. I didn't see it at first, naturally. As much as I could, I kept the vocabulary coming from my mouth clean, uplifting and positive. 

 

When I reactivated back into Church, and saw for the first time For The Strength of Youth pamphlet - I read it over and over. Kept it in my purse always. I choose to avoid people who choose to be negative. I don't need them in my life, ever. The only people I really know who are highly educated are the members of my sisters stake in Seattle. I have always enjoyed going to her Stake conferences and remaining for the *Linger Longers*. These members who are professors at the University of Seattle, Doctors, Lawyers, CEO's of large corporations - - - Highly Intellectual People, don't use foul language. Their conversations are enjoyable and it is rare that I don't learn something new. 

 

I love riding the city buses around Seattle. I am a people watcher. So it stands to reason that I am a people listener. The language gets foul when we get into the seamier parts of town. I love to sit in a park, or shopping mall and watch and listen to the people. 

 

Anatess; I totally agree - kids from the 80's on back also spell correctly and have better grammar and diction. The other saying, " You Know" is just as irritating as "Like". 

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Iggy: I sure hope that you aim that attitude at the hordes of LDS who use "alternate" words as well.  If you say fetch, for example, you may as well drop the real F bomb.  You mean the same thing when you say it, and in truth, whether subconscious or not, that is what people hear.

 

 

I'd rather have a profanity problem then a pornography problem or Word of Wisdom issues.  We all sin differently.

 

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Guest LiterateParakeet

Iggy: I sure hope that you aim that attitude at the hordes of LDS who use "alternate" words as well.  If you say fetch, for example, you may as well drop the real F bomb.  You mean the same thing when you say it, and in truth, whether subconscious or not, that is what people hear.

 

 

I'd rather have a profanity problem then a pornography problem or Word of Wisdom issues.  We all sin differently.

 

I love this.  That's the bottom line isn't it?  Sure I would rather swear (and I do occasionally) than have a pornography problem or Word of Wisdom problem because the latter are so addictive and hard to stop.  But we all sin.

 

Some might try to justify themselves saying their sins are not as serious (I don't mean you Mirkwood, I'm just speaking of a human tendency we all have).  When it comes down to it...any sin...even just one "teeny tiny one" could keep us separated from God if it were not for the Atonement.  

 

That's why my personal motto is to hold myself to a high standard of obedience (that's the goal anyway) but just love everyone else.  

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From: https://www.lds.org/youth/for-the-strength-of-youth/language?lang=eng

 

Language

Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good.

Ephesians 4:29

OTHER STANDARDS

How you communicate should reflect who you are as a son or daughter of God. Clean and intelligent language is evidence of a bright and wholesome mind. Good language that uplifts, encourages, and compliments others invites the Spirit to be with you. Our words, like our deeds, should be filled with faith, hope, and charity.

 

Choose friends who use good language. Help others improve their language by your example. Be willing to politely walk away or change the subject when those around you use inappropriate language.

Speak kindly and positively about others. Choose not to insult others or put them down, even in joking. Avoid gossip of any kind, and avoid speaking in anger. When you are tempted to say harsh or hurtful things, leave them unsaid.

HIDE

Always use the names of God and Jesus Christ with reverence and respect. Misusing the names of Deity is a sin. When you pray, address your Father in Heaven in reverent and respectful language. The Savior used such respectful language in the Lord’s Prayer (see Matthew 6:9–12).

Do not use profane, vulgar, or crude language or gestures, and do not tell jokes or stories about immoral actions. These are offensive to God and to others.

Remember that these standards for your use of language apply to all forms of communication, including texting on a cell phone or communicating on the Internet.

If you have developed the habit of using language that is not in keeping with these standards—such as swearing, mocking, gossiping, or speaking in anger to others—you can change. Pray for help. Ask your family and friends to support you in your desire to use good language.

 

(bolding and underlining by me)

 

Are we, as adults, not held to the same standards as our youth? I believe so. 

 

Mirkwood - I "aim my attitude" at all people who use foul language. It matters not to me what faith they are or are not. What race or what gender they are. Or what job they hold, what educational level they have. There is NO EXCUSE for having a potty mouth.  

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I love this.  That's the bottom line isn't it?  Sure I would rather swear (and I do occasionally) than have a pornography problem or Word of Wisdom problem because the latter are so addictive and hard to stop.  But we all sin.

 

Some might try to justify themselves saying their sins are not as serious (I don't mean you Mirkwood, I'm just speaking of a human tendency we all have).  When it comes down to it...any sin...even just one "teeny tiny one" could keep us separated from God if it were not for the Atonement.  

 

That's why my personal motto is to hold myself to a high standard of obedience (that's the goal anyway) but just love everyone else.  

I understand the addicitive angle of the 'which sin is worse to have' but to me, any sin that affects others and not just you is problematic.  (not you directly, just in general)

And to add to Iggy's point - the old seminary adage of "be in the world but not of it" comes to mind.

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Iggy: I sure hope that you aim that attitude at the hordes of LDS who use "alternate" words as well.  If you say fetch, for example, you may as well drop the real F bomb.  You mean the same thing when you say it, and in truth, whether subconscious or not, that is what people hear.

 

 

I'd rather have a profanity problem then a pornography problem or Word of Wisdom issues.  We all sin differently.

 

 

Iggy...please show me where I said potty mouths are okay (or mocking, gossiping speaking angrily).

Came across that way to me. 

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Whenever I hear a swear word, I cringe.  Thankfully, my family and friends do not use swear words.  My environment now is such that unless I am watching TV or a movie, I rarely hear a swear word.  (When I was working that was a different matter).  And I try to stay away from movies,  tv shows, or books that have bad language.   I won't say that family/friends never use bad language, but it's rare.  I've gotten after my kids for saying freakin'.  I've told them that every time they use that word, I know what they are exchanging it for, and my mind automatically goes to the harsher word.  I don't want to hear that word, I don't want to think that word.  And especially in my home, I don't want that word.

 

When I go out shopping or I'm out and about, and I hear kids and adults swear or take the Lord's name in vain, my attitude is one of sorrow.  Not one of shock, because I've heard it all, and not much shocks me.  But, my Spirit is definitely bruised when confronted with such language.  And when I hear women speak with a foul mouth, I am especially saddened.  I will take class over crass any day.

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Guest LiterateParakeet

I understand the addicitive angle of the 'which sin is worse to have' but to me, any sin that affects others and not just you is problematic.  (not you directly, just in general)

 

This brings up an interesting thought...I wonder don't ALL of our sins affect some besides ourselves?  I think so, but I need to ponder it a little more.

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EarlJibbs, I prefer to surround myself with good, positive feelings, language, music. My first husband was evil. I didn't see it at first, naturally. As much as I could, I kept the vocabulary coming from my mouth clean, uplifting and positive. 

 

When I reactivated back into Church, and saw for the first time For The Strength of Youth pamphlet - I read it over and over. Kept it in my purse always. I choose to avoid people who choose to be negative. I don't need them in my life, ever. The only people I really know who are highly educated are the members of my sisters stake in Seattle. I have always enjoyed going to her Stake conferences and remaining for the *Linger Longers*. These members who are professors at the University of Seattle, Doctors, Lawyers, CEO's of large corporations - - - Highly Intellectual People, don't use foul language. Their conversations are enjoyable and it is rare that I don't learn something new. 

 

I love riding the city buses around Seattle. I am a people watcher. So it stands to reason that I am a people listener. The language gets foul when we get into the seamier parts of town. I love to sit in a park, or shopping mall and watch and listen to the people. 

 

Anatess; I totally agree - kids from the 80's on back also spell correctly and have better grammar and diction. The other saying, " You Know" is just as irritating as "Like".

Lawyers don't use foul language? Then the law firm I work at must be an anomaly. It has the foulest language of any workplace I've ever been in.

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I wouldn't be surprised at all that lawyers have potty mouths - some lawyers - not every single one ;) I say that because I'm guessing that such line of work is pretty stressful and often times frustrating. Though, my sister is a lawyer and she seems to keep a pretty clean vocabulary, at least on the forefront. But like I said, hospitals behind the scenes are pretty bad. People would be outright shocked to hear the things said by doctors and nurses when patients aren't in hearing range..

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Iggy, two separate thoughts comingled.  The second thought had more to do with your extreme stance.  Do you treat coffee drinkers the same?  How about the smokers?  How about the teenager that has a masturbation problem?  The serial adulterer?  The thief?  The speeder?  The spouse abuser?  The neighbor who allows his dog to bark all night?

 

We all sin differently.  Some things are worse then others.  I find your stance on "potty mouths" extreme. 

 

Are we clear now or do I need to further clarify?

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Guest LiterateParakeet

I don't think so, depends on the sin.

How does masturbation or drinking a coffee effect anyone but the one who partook?

 

That's a good point.  So does that mean if I swear when I am alone that's less terrible than swearing in front of someone else?   :D

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