Where is everyone?


Suzie
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I think a combination of format changes and problems (i.e. your post didn't show up in 'View New Content' no matter what the settings are) and over-moderation have choked some of the life from the forum.

 

I enjoy discussing and helping people with real world problems but allot of things that people go thru are off limits now. I also enjoy debating politics but the over regulation makes me hesitant to post anything. The world is getting worse, our problems are getting more challenging so where do LDS people go now to discuss real issues and get advice in an anonymous public forum...not here. There is no purpose in anonymity here because what we discuss here is the same issues we discuss face to face in Elders Quorum and Relief Society and in halls between classes.

 

It's sad because I can't find any other forum that offers active level headed moderating that has as diverse contributors as this site once had. If I want to discuss politics the only forum I've found contains a bunch of wacked out conspiracy theorists that while claiming they are LDS think the church itself is part of the New World Order, if I want to discuss challenges with living the gospel I'm stuck getting advice from cultural Mormons. 

 

I really like the people and moderators on this site but the tighter rules and format issues have taken a toll.

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We've been busy trying to squeeze as much as we can out of the last of summer break.

 

I think the new format has lost us a few people, or at least decreased their activity. We like what we know, and getting used to this software will take some time.

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I enjoy discussing and helping people with real world problems but allot of things that people go thru are off limits now. I also enjoy debating politics but the over regulation makes me hesitant to post anything. 

 

The only topics that we have taken completely off the table is the adult conversations regarding sexual issues.

 

As far as politics topics, it has been a long time since we have not allowed a political discussion.  The one thing we are limited to is discussing anyone that is currently a candidate for any office within the US.

 

The thing about political discussion is it turns into attacks against other posters. That's when we draw the line.

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The only topics that we have taken completely off the table is the adult conversations regarding sexual issues.

 

 

The scourge of our time. Lost of sexual issues out there. So anyone that has a spouse cheat on them or anyone that is struggling with a sexual addiction is not welcome to ask for advice?

 

 

As far as politics topics, it has been a long time since we have not allowed a political discussion.  The one thing we are limited to is discussing anyone that is currently a candidate for any office within the US.

 

The thing about political discussion is it turns into attacks against other posters. That's when we draw the line.

 

Obama sucks....there I said it.

 

..thanks

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and over-moderation have choked some of the life from the forum.

 

 Over-moderation or too many rules? Personally, I believe it is not a problem with over-moderation at least not with regards to posters but yes with threads. There are members who attack and are plain mean and unfortunately ruin the experience for the rest, that's where I think perhaps the mods should step in and deal with the particular member/s in question rather than close a good thread but like I always say, not our site, not our rules.

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The scourge of our time. Lost of sexual issues out there. So anyone that has a spouse cheat on them or anyone that is struggling with a sexual addiction is not welcome to ask for advice?

 

 

 

I guess you haven't checked out the marriage and relationship forum. There are multiple threads there regarding infidelity and such.

 

Sexual issues have become too graphic in the past.  Far too graphic for a site such as this.  That's why the new ruling.

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 Over-moderation or too many rules? Personally, I believe it is not a problem with over-moderation at least not with regards to posters but yes with threads. There are members who attack and are plain mean and unfortunately ruin the experience for the rest, that's where I think perhaps the mods should step in and deal with the particular member/s in question rather than close a good thread but like I always say, not our site, not our rules.

 

And what makes you think we don't try to do that?  We have tried to do that and we get ignored.  So the next step is to close the thread.  People don't always see what is going on behind the scenes to try and rectify a problem.

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I used to have great conversations and leaning here but have not in a long time it seems.  I'm too afraid to offend when I ask simple questions so I am not as able to open good discussions as I used too.  That is a huge part why I am not as active as I used to be.  

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I miss Vort but TFP kinda makes up for it...

 

And FunkyTown, SoulSearcher, Jason_J, and AndyPG... and even Anddenex are Ninjas... they come and poof, they're gone again...

 

And there were those Filipinos that posted once and never again... I was like, where'd they go?

 

And you know, even beefche has been quiet lately.  But Dravin is here...

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And what makes you think we don't try to do that?  We have tried to do that and we get ignored.  So the next step is to close the thread.  People don't always see what is going on behind the scenes to try and rectify a problem.

 

And what makes you think I am saying that? You manage this site Pam, how can it be that in a forum mods are ignored? That's unheard of.That's a total lack of disrespect for the site and the moderation team and if mods are to be respected and not ignored, then perhaps the approach from the moderation team towards these issues should be more stern (if the member/s continue ignoring the warning). Now, if you tell me you guys do not want to give "a time out" but rather  keep a member who continue being disrespectful towards other members and ignoring the mods, then that's another story altogether. Again, your site, your rules, your vision.

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 Over-moderation or too many rules? Personally, I believe it is not a problem with over-moderation at least not with regards to posters but yes with threads. There are members who attack and are plain mean and unfortunately ruin the experience for the rest, that's where I think perhaps the mods should step in and deal with the particular member/s in question rather than close a good thread but like I always say, not our site, not our rules.

 

Funny thing is... when we do 'deal' with problematic posters they almost always respond with "they attacked me first" or "they are taking it completely the wrong way" or "Censorship!!!"  Then they go right back into it.

 

Which means the mods have to become more stern and firm...  Guess what... a percentage(small admittedly)  of the missing posters are ones the mods did get very firm with...  And now we have people mourning their absence

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Okay, Stop.  I'm not a mod.  But I'm getting uncomfortable with this mod bashing/interrogation...

 

If we can't avoid that in a Where is Everyone thread, I'm going to vote to close this thread.  Pshaw! 

 

Group hug.

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Funny thing is... when we do 'deal' with problematic posters they almost always respond with "they attacked me first" or "they are taking it completely the wrong way" or "Censorship!!!"  Then they go right back into it.

 

Which means the mods have to become more stern and firm...  Guess what... a percentage(small admittedly)  of the missing posters are ones the mods did get very firm with...  And now we have people mourning their absence

 

If they say the attack them first, can't someone check over the posts and see? If they are saying they are taking it in the wrong way, can't they be told to explain what they meant and resolve the issue calmly? Or is it an issue of time as well for the mods?

 

I am not mourning any of the usual trouble-makers lol but I miss a few because of their unique perspective.

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And what makes you think I am saying that? You manage this site Pam, how can it be that in a forum mods are ignored? That's unheard of.That's a total lack of disrespect for the site and the moderation team and if mods are to be respected and not ignored, then perhaps the approach from the moderation team towards these issues should be more stern (if the member/s continue ignoring the warning). Now, if you tell me you guys do not want to give "a time out" but rather  keep a member who continue being disrespectful towards other members and ignoring the mods, then that's another story altogether. Again, your site, your rules, your vision.

 

You asked why we didn't just take care of the individual members instead of closing threads.

 

I hate closing threads.  You'll see moderators quite often putting out warnings on the threads only to go completely ignored.  We send messages to people.  No responses yet we know those people have seen them.  

 

People have asked why we don't just delete the posts that are derogatory or inflammatory. The problem with that is...when a thread gets heated, numerous posts would need to be deleted. Then you have all of the posts that have quoted the posts deleted.  If you delete numerous posts, then the conversation no longer makes sense.  

 

At that point the only option we really have is to close the thread.

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Okay, Stop.  I'm not a mod.  But I'm getting uncomfortable with this mod bashing...

 

If we can't avoid that in a Where is Everyone thread, I'm going to vote to close this thread.  Pshaw! 

 

Group hug.

 

Anatess, this is an example of what I am talking about. Who is bashing the mods? Talking openly about the issues that are affecting the activity of the site isn't bashing the mods, we are all adults here and as long as we are being respectful towards one another, I don't see what is the problem..and mostly why do you want to "vote" to close a thread. If anyone feels they do not want to participate on this thread, it is their right but so far, it is not breaking any rules.

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You asked why we didn't just take care of the individual members instead of closing threads.

 

I hate closing threads.  You'll see moderators quite often putting out warnings on the threads only to go completely ignored.  We send messages to people.  No responses yet we know those people have seen them.  

 

People have asked why we don't just delete the posts that are derogatory or inflammatory. The problem with that is...when a thread gets heated, numerous posts would need to be deleted. Then you have all of the posts that have quoted the posts deleted.  If you delete numerous posts, then the conversation no longer makes sense.  

 

At that point the only option we really have is to close the thread.

 

I understand Pam, thanks. Perhaps I am a bit of a extremist. If a member is given warnings numerous times and they choose to ignore it, then some sort of "suspension" should take place, I don't know..a few days without posting or something like that until they rectify their attitude.

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I understand Pam, thanks. Perhaps I am a bit of a extremist. If a member is given warnings numerous times and they choose to ignore it, then some sort of "suspension" should take place, I don't know..a few days without posting or something like that until they rectify their attitude.

 

And again. We don't announce actions we have taken as a moderating staff.  We do suspensions.  There is just not anything showing that we have done that action.  Unless you are on the site every single day and follow all threads, you may not even notice that it has been a few days since someone posted.

 

As I mentioned earlier, there is a lot that goes on behind the scenes that the general public is not aware of.

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