How do I bring this up??


helplesslywondering
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You have to just tell him.

 

You undoubtedly feel embarrassed, you think it will be awkward, and that he and everyone else will judge you.

 

You probably also feel guilt, and unworthy because of your sin.

 

So you approach with a heavy heart and fear.   Once you confess and listen to the bishop's councils you will feel those burdens begin to lift.  Peace and comfort will come.   It will be so worth it.  You might even wish you had gone to the bishop much sooner then you did

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Did you set up the appointment specifically to discuss this, or is it part of the usual teenager Bishop check-ins? When I was a teenager it seemed like every meeting with the bishop involved going through temple recommend questions (except for tithing settlement). If you are unable to break the silence with the explanation that you need his help with your addiction right out of the gate, you could always bring it up in direct response to the chastity question (assuming he is asking temple recommend questions).

 

Really there is no other way to do it than to just do it.

 

Power to you.

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I suggest discussing with a YW leader first, and then the bishop, maybe even having the YW leader with you when you meet with the bishop. I question the appropriateness of a YW discussing such things one on one with a male adult.

Disagree.  This is something for the parents to handle/help with.  They see her more often and won't be released at any given time unlike a YW leader.

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Ideally her parents knowing and helping would be best...   But that means she would have to tell them, and if she is worried about telling her bishop... then she is probably even more worried about telling her parents whom she lives with and interacts with every day.

 

As for the appropriateness of such a discussion I disagree with the mindset that makes every adult male a sexual predator.

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As for the appropriateness of such a discussion I disagree with the mindset that makes every adult male a sexual predator.

I personally believe this popular mindset is of Satan. It's part of my Satan is destroying the community family as well as the traditional family belief.

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You can do it! Like others have said he's there to help.  More teens (and adults) struggle with this in the church than we know. One Bishop I know said that he had dozens of people in his ward of 150-200 who were struggling with this.  So it's not like it's something he hasn't heard before or will be at all shocked by. You'll feel a lot better after confession.  Good luck you can do it.

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I suggest discussing with a YW leader first, and then the bishop, maybe even having the YW leader with you when you meet with the bishop. I question the appropriateness of a YW discussing such things one on one with a male adult.

Not this.

 

I to have reservations about bishops meeting by themselves with YW, but I am sure your bishop will know how to deal with the situation 

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If the op has a TRUSTED YW advisor, I don't think it's a bad idea to let her know the situation--but understanding that such a conversation is preparatory to, not a substitute for, talking to a bishop.

Let's face it--a teenaged girl talking to an adult male about her porn addiction is, while not inappropriate, undeniably awkward. IMHO every effort should be made to make her feel comfortable and prepared for such a conversation.

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If the op has a TRUSTED YW advisor, I don't think it's a bad idea to let her know the situation--but understanding that such a conversation is preparatory to, not a substitute for, talking to a bishop.

Let's face it--a teenaged girl talking to an adult male about her porn addiction is, while not inappropriate, undeniably awkward. IMHO every effort should be made to make her feel comfortable and prepared for such a conversation.

 

Realistically, awkward is part of it. It always has been, and always will be. It requires honest and sincere humility to confess, no matter who you are, and it's part of (in my opinion) why we are to confess.

 

If someone can go in and confess a serious sin to their bishop and not feel awkward about it, there's a problem.

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I've been a branch president and had to do these kinds of interviews before.  I'm also a parent with five children.  I would urge you to talk to your parents privately first.  Then have them go with you to see the bishop.  If you truly have an addiction to pornography, you won't beat it alone.  Parents can help you.  You'll need an "accountability partner" and they'd be your best choice.  Satan tells you that you have to deal with this alone.  The Lord would broaden the circle of care and let you know you have support.  

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I wasn't close to my parents growing up. I had made a mistake as a teenager and I needed to see the Bishop but was afraid to do so. I talked to my seminary teacher (not  every detail but enough that he knew how serious it was) and asked for advice. He told me to see the bishop and start with telling him what I told my teacher and go from there. My seminary teacher was a good friend and with him not judging me for what happened and being calm, I mustered up the courage to see my bishop, who was as equally understanding and kind. I was not only surprised at how foolish I was being with not going directly to him, but at the weight I felt lifted from my shoulders that allowed me to repent.

 

Bottom line, see your bishop. However if you feel comfortable talking to a leader, there is nothing wrong with that. Just know that they have no authority in helping in the repentance process.

 

When I was an Elders Quorum President and worked with some of the other men in the ward I sometimes heard them telling me things that should be brought up with the Bishop. I would stop them, let them know that I have a shoulder for them and an ear to listen but that they needed to see the Bishop. I would let them talk if they wanted with that understanding.

 

Best whishes.

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Alright, so I've set up an appointment with my Bishop for this Sunday. I need to tell him about my pornography addiction of almost 3 years (I am a teenage girl, by the way, so this is really hard). How do I bring it up once I'm there?? Please help

Tell him the problem so he can help you map out a way to find your way to full repentance. Also he can get counseling for you. If you don't do this it will only get worse until one day you will lose your soul.
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If your Bishop is experienced then they'll have dealt with this issue before and not just in teenagers. If your habit of using Pornography is so dominating that you cannot control it on your own then you're going to need someone to keep you off of that path by being a good listener and provide you with plenty of encouragement. 

 

I'm lucky in a lot of ways as I've never really understood pornography. I can't even stomach the odd mating ritual on National Geographic nevermind anything on a porn website.Plus when you look into the Biographies of the people ( especially the women ) there is always a broken heart to go along with a broken home a lot of the time which always left me with the impression these women were more or less being misled down a destructive path. 

 

Pornography is the #1 most searched item on the Internet and has been for some time so you aren't alone in this however hats off to you for being mature and level headed enough and honest with yourself with this, as it would be all too easy just to brush it under the rug and pretend it's not there. I don't believe your Bishop will judge you or put you in any sort of situation where you may encounter the disappointment or disapproval of your parents. 

 

Just be honest, 

 

Say that your curiosity got the better of you and before you know it , it became a regular part of your life and you want out of the downward spiral. 

 

So long as you remember that Pornography is nothing but cheap thrills and that there is more to life you'll learn to keep that sort of phony fulfillment out of your mind and make plenty of space for other things you could be doing with your time. I know all habits are hard to break but you are doing the right thing and as they say, the first step is always the most difficult. 

 

You'll look back on this and wonder why you were stressing so much. Everyone gets caught in a snare from time to time and we ( humans ) don't like to admit our mistakes/weaknesses. 

 

Good luck with it and I'm sure you'll be fine. 

 

Bless.

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