My wife has decided to leave the church.


Recommended Posts

Hmm. Maybe this is where there is a disconnect -- in referring to belief and faith based on a testimony of the character of Joseph Smith or the like. These things are not a testimony.

Alright...sure...from an actual meaning of the word, they could be called a testimony. But from the meaning that is common to the LDS term "having a testimony", they are not. Having a testimony does not mean liking the church because of it's policies, practices, etc., or believing Joseph was a prophet because he was a swell guy. The meaning of having a testimony means having a sure witness from the Holy Ghost of the truths of the gospel, including the fact that Joseph was a prophet, etc. Therefore, if one's so-called testimony (which is no testimony at all) is based in mistaken things, then it is an entirely valid understanding to see a falling away or struggles of faith as stemming from a weak testimony -- because they do not have a strong testimony in the things that are actually meant when we refer to people having testimonies.

It seems logical to me that one's testimony could falter even if they recieved a true witness. Whether we like it or not, Joseph Smith is a pivitol figured in which we must place much faith in order to believe our 'witness' that the church is God's one and only true church. If we doubt Joseph Smith, it seems completely illogical to not also doubt the Church's claim of being the only true church. They are 100% correlated in my opinion. IMO This is possible even when having the kind of testimony that you describe.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

...That's all this is.  Just a little mist of darkness.  And yeah, it's scary.  But remember what perfect love does.  It's casts out all that fear.  Lean instead on trusting yourself, your wife, your God, and in trusting that earth life is suppose to stretch us in these ways.  My experience is that fighting processes like this creates unnecessary pain and suffering.  Submitting with a teachable spirit brings growth.

 

 

Hi Misshalfway, great insight and i particularly liked what you said in the above quote.

 

I am going thru the same thing and it brings me comfort to hear those words you just said. But you are refering to the act of the wife going down the inactivity path alone and not the wife turning against the church causing strife in the home between spouses?

 

just wondering because my wife is doing her best to steer my kids away from mormon doctrine and I dont believe that I should just stand by and be submissive.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi Misshalfway, great insight and i particularly liked what you said in the above quote.

 

I am going thru the same thing and it brings me comfort to hear those words you just said. But you are refering to the act of the wife going down the inactivity path alone and not the wife turning against the church causing strife in the home between spouses?

 

just wondering because my wife is doing her best to steer my kids away from mormon doctrine and I dont believe that I should just stand by and be submissive.

Well, I don't know exactly what you are going through Priesthoodpower, and I can't know what you wife is feeling, but I don't think submission is a good thing in any case.  That sort of reaction seems like a way to stop the conflict and maybe placate the situation into feeling peaceful and supportive when it truly may not be.  What I mean is that "being submissive" could actually be rather dishonest and defensive.  And that just decreases the trust in the relationship.

 

I'd rather see the two people listen more and seek to understand each other more in empathetic ways. I know I tend to do better when my partner listens to my feelings, my concerns, and even my disillusionment in non-reactive ways.  And when I feel deeply understood and supported, I know I get less defensive and feel more willing to reciprocate in supportive ways.  If I feel judged, I don't do as well.  Are you like that?

 

I don't know what it is about your wife's new parenting that is alarming you, but you are still married and she is still obligated to negotiate parenting practices with you.  I don't see a problem with you sharing your concerns/fears,etc.  Hopefully she can adjust to meet your needs.  Of course if you harbor fears and resentments without talking or your approach feels like an attack....well, you'll probably experience more disconnection.  And that will be crappy.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm wrong because I used the brain God gave me to make a common sense determination.

one doesn't fall away from the church after reading an essay if one has a strong testimony. In fact, if one has a strong testimony they don't fall away even when faced with doubts. A strong testimony will root a man or woman to Christ and bring them to the point of conversion.

I'm sorry.  But this assessment feels rather one dimensional to me.  I appreciate the idea that one little breeze of anti mormon sentiment shouldn't topple a strong testimony, but we can't know what happens in peoples hearts.  We can't know their experiences and what leads one to an experience with doubt.  

 

I look back at my life in the church and I now appreciate so very much my experiences with doubt and disillusionment.  They were necessary building blocks and I'm a better person for it.  And now after having some experience with this stuff, it hurts me to feel such judgments from other members.  Other members who may have looked at my experience at some unstable moment in time and completely misunderstood what God may have been doing with me.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Too many members appear to apply a doctrine of infalibility to our Mormon leaders. I'm sure our leaders will be the first to tell you how imperfect they are. They don't share their mistakes, just as they tell us not to share when we teach in church. Joseph Smith was no different. I see a lot of what he did as "blunders". Heavenly Father didn't tell him what to do at all times and in all things any more than he does you and I. He chose JS as an instrument to accomplish the things he did accomplish, but he didn't remove JS's free choice and free will and JS made a lot of mistakes - just as I do.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Joseph Smith's self-reflection on this topic (his mistakes) is as follows:

 

Although I do wrong, I do not the wrongs that I am charged with doing; the wrong that I do is through the frailty of human nature, like other men. No man lives without fault.

 

Joseph is accused of a great many things, most of which I expect are either simply false or taken wildly out of context. I personally see very little of what Joseph did as "blunders". In his position, I would never have done half so well, nor IMO would have any other man (or woman) who criticizes him.

 

In my view, the membership's problem vis-à-vis Joseph Smith is less an application of the false doctrine of infallibility and more a lack of application of the true doctrine of faith in the words of a prophet.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It seems logical to me that one's testimony could falter even if they recieved a true witness. Whether we like it or not, Joseph Smith is a pivitol figured in which we must place much faith in order to believe our 'witness' that the church is God's one and only true church. If we doubt Joseph Smith, it seems completely illogical to not also doubt the Church's claim of being the only true church. They are 100% correlated in my opinion. IMO This is possible even when having the kind of testimony that you describe.

 

I'm not saying strong testimonies cannot be lost. Of course someone who was once strong in the gospel can fall away. Even the elect may be deceived.

 

What I'm talking about is why this happens. And my plain contention is that it does NOT happen against our will and choice. We are not victims of apostasy. We are not victims of failed faith.

 

Yes, we can be victims of hurt, despair, confusion, and other mortal weaknesses. But not of the choice that God has given us by way of Agency to accept or reject His gospel.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 weeks later...

A quick update.  Things in my opinion have gone from bad to worse in some areas and have been suprisingly positive in another(singular).  Bad first.  She no longer believes in Chrisitanity in general.  She believes in God but in what form she is unsure.  She has started reading popular books of the day dealing with peoples delusions about the existence of God and how science will ultimately discover what morality really is.  The belief in some sort of God and reading these books seems contradictory to me.  I suppose it will only be a matter of time before the belief in a supreme being also leaves her. 

 

She has also started to seek out other people of the same persuasion, in earnest.  She has several people she knew who left the church that she has contacted recently asking for their experience.  She also has a cousin that she just found out had left the church that wrote her an email detailing his "escape" from mormonism and "bondage". 

 

She has up to this point been attending church still but this Sunday informed me she would no longer be going.  Just a few weeks ago she said she would support me in taking the children to church and attend with us even is she didn't participate.  An obvious reversal of feeling but not suprising given the direction she is going.   I suppose it won't be long before she doesn't want me taking the kids to church.

 

She took her garments off a few weeks ago.  That was a hard day. 

 

This Sunday when we got home from church she wasn't there.  A couple of hours later she came in with a bunch of groceries.  Not a big deal really except our kids know we don't shop on Sunday.  So much for the home evening lesson a few months ago about keeping the sabbath day holy.

 

In an email this last week she let me know that she won't give up hope that I will also leave the church.  She wants to remain married and believes our marriage will be better than ever.  I'm sure this belief is somewhat based on the experience of her brother who reports his marriage as being stronger than ever after leaving the church.  At first, her brother's wife fought against his leaving the church but now she has accepted it.  How does the saying go "We first learn to tolerate, then accept, then embrace."  I'm sure I didn't get that exactly right  but close enough. 

 

When my parents found out where she was and the current state of our marriage they dropped everything and drove for two days so they could spend a couple of hours talking to us.  I let them know that gospel discussion would be fruiltless as she now regards anything religious as having no value.  The talk focused primarily on she and I remaining married.  My parents(and everyone else for that matter) believe that ultimately we should remain together and work out a balance that each can live with.  She wants to remain together(see paragraph above).  I don't know if I can given her current course. 

 

Now for the good.

 

Our ward is trying really hard to help her feel loved.  Multiple people have come over to talk to her and let her know they love her.  Some have shared their experiences with doubt about the church.  A good neighbor, a woman my wife sought and gained as a friend, sent her a text on Sunday expressing love for her and letting her know she wanted her at church with her.  Another good woman in the ward came over and expressed love for her.  The relief society president came over and spent a couple of hours talking with her.  On Sunday, a couple stopped me in the hall and a good sister gave me a hug and let me know they hadn't given up on her and that it wasn't over.  This has been very good for me.  I had reservations about our current ward when we moved in but slowly the people in the ward have won me over.  I'm close to believing it is the best ward I have ever been in. 

 

That's about all the good I can give at this time.   

 

I continue to make mistakes but have determined that whatever happens now I need to stay as far away from getting angry or arguementative as I possibly can.   At times this means I will just have to be silent.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Thanks for the update.  I had read your original post and wondered how things were going.

 

The Church is like a house.  Many people enter the right house by the wrong door.  They end up in a strange room that they don't understand, and their solution is to get out of the house as soon as possible.  Some people stay out for the rest of their lives.  But some wander around, eventually find the right door, enter in, and find peace.  

 

That's what happened to me.  As I have mentioned in previous posts, I once started the process of having my name removed from Church records.  Many of my friends (atheists all) egged me on and expressed great anger when I paused the process to think some more.  Ten years went by and my testimony suddenly showed signs of life and is now stronger than it has ever been.  I am genuinely puzzled by some anti-LDS persons who I think can't see the forest for the trees.  (Now if I can just figure out a way to get integrated back into my ward.)

 

Your ward sounds wonderful.  I hope your wife can start viewing the Church as a set of transcendent choices and not as a set of cold beliefs about the material universe.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I am currently in the same exact boat as you maybe a few months ahead of you, I have passed the tolerate and accept stage and am learning how to embrace my wifes new outlook on life.

 

I think the way that im getting through is to say to myself that "its not a bad thing", "its just a phase and she will comeback one day". She has already had bad experiences with non-lds members out in the community where they back stab her or act less civilized then what were are used to with our member friends and through these experiences she realizes that mormons arent that bad after all. Sometimes you need to experience the dark side to realize how dark it really is.

 

Keep the faith and have hope my friend. Good luck bro!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 1 month later...

Just an update.  Two months in and things have calmed down considerably at least with regards to tempers and arguements.  I have been making an extended effort to make sure we are friends before going to bed every night.  If nothing else, that is one good thing that has come out of this.  That isn't to say we haven't been having some arguements. 

 

She is well out of the church now.  She also no longer believes in God.  She has written her story and is chomping at the bit to share it with others.   Thankfully her new social circles have discouraged her from doing this.  She has been going to ex mormon gatherings.  At first I was upset about this, especially because they meet primarily on Sunday and she is practically gone all Sunday now.  She also has an ex mormon book club she attends and a few other gatherings.  I'm trying to take these things in stride but it is hard.

 

She is angry at the church and feels that her younger years were stolen from her.  There is a lot of regret there and that hurts not only her but also me as her list of regrets often include marriage and kids.  She feels like she has been robbed of opportunity for better things in life.  She has said that she just has to accept what her life is now because she is in it and can't change it. 

 

That pretty much sums up what has been happening lately.  I do have a question.  We got into an arguement the other night about tithing.  She believes that tithing should now only be paid on half of our family income as she no longer wants to contribute money to what she considers an immoral and evil organization.  Our money has always been just that, our money, shared equally even though it is all derived from my employment.  She has reasoned now that  half of our income is hers for the work she does at home and that she should decide what to do with the charitable contribution portion of that income.  She doesn't want the money to do something else with.  She just doesn't want it going to the church.  Thoughts?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

 She has reasoned now that  half of our income is hers for the work she does at home and that she should decide what to do with the charitable contribution portion of that income.  ...Thoughts?

This really depends on how you and her see the money. If it is considered both of yours "ours", you will need to find some sort of compromise or agreement. If it is viewed as a wage  for being a mother her argument is valid (which sounds like a horrible proposition to me). If the money is considered yours, then it is up to you.

You indicated that it is probably either #1 or #2. As with any disagreements both of you will need to communicate with each other to express how you feel about things and see how to move forward.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

She is angry at the church and feels that her younger years were stolen from her.  There is a lot of regret there and that hurts not only her but also me as her list of regrets often include marriage and kids.  

 

This is something I don't get . . . ex-mormons claiming their youth was "stolen".  Stolen how? so one can go out drinking, partying, etc. as if only Mormon parents see that as a bad thing for their kids.

 

Regardless of religion any parent worth their salt would advise against and to the extent possible prohibit their children from doing so.  They would teach their children the dangers of drinking, drugs, sex, etc.  The claims of a "stolen" childhood could be made against any number of parents going back generations.

 

"Stolen" really means the ability to do whatever, whenever with no consequences and life just doesn't work that way.  I'm truly sorry you are having to go through a very delayed rebellious adolescent phase with your wife.  One way or another it will work out . . . Keep loving her and sticking with her through this time . . . which may be a long one.

 

As for the tithing thing; I'd say not only no . . . but heck no.  She can run her life however she pleases and if she has a job and doesn't want to pay tithing on it . . . fine.  

 

Let's put it this way, if you were single and she were a nanny or a housekeeper, you would pay tithing on the money you bring in and then pay your housekeeper.  It would be the housekeeper's decision to pay tithing or not on the money they receive. But she certainly didn't earn the income you bring in. From a financial perspective, she helps keep expense down (i.e. you'd have to hire help without her so you could work), but she does not earn that money.  That is a huge fallacy in thinking that she earns half the income . . . no way, no how.

 

That's the point of being head of household; sometimes you just gotta put your foot down.  Compromise is good, well and necessary in a marriage . . . but at some point you've got to take charge.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I thought the same thing about how she could feel robbed. Robbed of the cosequences of making poor choices. I wish I had my youth back so I could join the Church and not screw up my life as I did before I joined. 

 

Nonetheless, I am happy to hear you are together and working things out. It will take time. Her animosity - and participation in acidic groups - will wain. Nobody can sustain that much hate mongering. It amazes me that ex-Mormons do so much hating, but hey, they are hurting and greiving something.

 

As for the tithing, yjacket has some valid points. I would have probably conceeded in your wife's favor, if only for the sake of harmony. I don't think you would be held accountable for accommodating your spouse's request. We are taught that we are in partnership. She'll be accountable.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

If one of her regrets is that she put a college education/professional training on hold for early marriage and child-bearing, and if your kids are all now in school, and she doesn't want to be a stay-at-home mom anymore . . . why not tell her that you're fine with her taking half the family tithing and investing it into her education/professional development as she sees fit for a pre-defined period of years; but then after that you expect that you will each be free to tithe or otherwise donate up to 10% of your individual incomes as you each see fit.

 

Also--I suggest marital counseling.  If she's flat-out saying that you and the children are among her past regrets--that's not right, it's not healthy, and it's not normal.  Your marriage cannot last long if she's nursing feelings like this and you're never sure where you stand with her.

Edited by Just_A_Guy
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Zero,

 

I'm glad to hear you and your wife are working through things, even if it is a bumpy road.

 

For what my $0.02 is worth, I doubt she'll keep the full-fledged anger up for more than a few months.  Being rageful is just not a sustainable emotion for long periods.  I've heard ex-mormons describe their journey as thus: 1) find out something that shatters their belief, 2) feel really angry/depressed, 3) Go to ex-mormon group and find out all the 'dirty little secrets' from the veterans and be really angry/depressed, 4) you become a veteran and tell all the newbies your 'dirty' story, and 5) get bored with the whole thing and leave.  Rage is just not a sustainable emotion.

 

As to the tithing thing, that's really up to you and your wife.  How do you view your money?  It might help you to think about how you would have answered that question a year ago.  If half of the money is hers, then she doesn't have to pay tithing on it.   You can still pay tithing on your half and be a full tithe payer.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm so sorry to hear of your struggles and I'm glad things are getting better. My ex-husband left the Church years ago. One of our deals on the matter was that he refrained from preaching against the Church. Our children were given free choice on the matters of religion and spirituality (both are active LDS).

 

Sadly, my ex eventually couldn't live with the fact his wife and kids were LDS as his ex-Mormon community had pretty much promised him we'd eventually follow him out.

 

It's important your wife has no concrete expectations of your actions or, as has been said, regrets on her marriage and family.

 

As for tithing, my ex and I both had careers, so I simply paid tithing on my income and left his out of it. He wasn't thrilled about that, but accepted it as my right. This, of course, was based on the set-up of our finances. I'm sure if you're both willing you can reach a compromise. (Speaking honestly, if the roles were switched, I wouldn't want my spouse using my income for tithing at his crazy organization of lies.)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 weeks later...

First I'm sorry this is happening to you. Second, your wife is questioning everything when her parents get a divorce. Divorce is detrimental even to adult children. I.e. "Mom, how can you tell me what is good or bad seeing that you married the wrong man, and were making major life mistakes into your 30's or 40's?"

 

Hang in there, many times there type of situations take years of independent study by the individual to sort out. It is okay for her to do that. Just try and keep the marriage and family together. God will work a miracle.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Well friends, I'm quickly losing hope.  The way we view things has diverged so far I'm not sure we can stay married.  For almost a month she has been telling me that we would both be happier being married to other people.  I've pretty much begged that we go to counseling and tried to reasure her that we can be happy together even if we believe differently.  Her response has always been that she didn't believe it was possible and she let me know she had already checked out of our marriage. 

 

Last saturday I asked her if we could just try to make it work for a year.  We would go to counseling and try to be happy.  She didn't give me an answer as to whether she was willing to do that but just reiterated that we would be happier with other people and that she had already checked out.  She also talked about finding someone who thinks like she does, someone she can connect with on a deep level, her soulmate.  It was all very hurtful.

 

Later that day, after speaking to my Mom about what was going on I came to the conclusion that we would never be happy together if she didn't believe we could and if she wasn't willing to try.  When she and I spoke again later Saturday I let her know that I would agree to a divorce.  That didn't go very well as I was pretty angry and upset.  I know I said things I shouldn't have but dang it if my heart is broken.  I then went to speak to her father and let him know what was going on as well as apologizing for the stupid things I had done while being married to his daughter.  I don't know why I felt the need to do that.

 

When I got home she had made a complete reversal from earlier that day.  Suddenly I was everything she had ever wanted and she admitted to being stupid and foolish.  She said she did think we could be happy together and that she was willing to try.  It was all very convincing and I really felt like she meant it.  It's what I desperatley wanted so I retracted divorce.

 

Fast forward to tonight.  She let me know she was going to a comedy club with friends and that she would invite me but she didn't think I would like it as it is for 21 and older and there would be objectionable material.  She's right,  I don't want to go to a place like that.  She basically told me this is who she is now and there was nothing wrong with it.

 

I'm not handling this well.  I guess my real problem is that she has been spending a lot of time with her new friends and very little with me.  Granted, I could go with her for coffee on Sundays to be with her but then I would miss church.  I could go to the comedy club or bar or whatever but then I would have to be in an environment I wouldn't like.  I could read the books her post mormon book club is reading but I have to be honest when I say I'm not interested in learning about polyamory or similar subjects.  

 

As we were arguing tonight before she left she told me this is who she is now and I would have to just deal with it.  I feel like I have been duped.  I feel like she wants to have her cake and eat it too and that she only said everything she did before out of fear of the unknown.  She is afraid to be a mother of 5 who is divorced.  She is afraid she will have to get a job and put our little ones in daycare.   She is afraid that she won't find someone better than me.  She is afraid and so she doesn't want to lose the stability but does want to live free.

 

I want her desperately.  I would forgive her a million times if she asked me but this hurts so much.  I don't know if I can keep doing it.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

.... I feel like I have been duped.  I feel like she wants to have her cake and eat it too and that she only said everything she did before out of fear of the unknown.  She is afraid to be a mother of 5 who is divorced.  She is afraid she will have to get a job and put our little ones in daycare.   She is afraid that she won't find someone better than me.  She is afraid and so she doesn't want to lose the stability but does want to live free.

 

I want her desperately.  I would forgive her a million times if she asked me but this hurts so much.  I don't know if I can keep doing it.

 

You nailed it. 

 

She's acting like a teenager: trying to figure out who she is, flipping 180's constantly, pushing the boundaries, and not really wanting the consequences.  Reality will have to eventually hit her, but I don't know when that'll happen.

 

I really wish I had more to offer than prayers and sympathies.  Mureen might be right about getting some individual counseling.  If your wife doesn't want to invite you in, or make things work, it's going to be a hard road. 

Edited by Jane_Doe
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Do not skip church to get coffee with her. Do not go to comedy clubs or any other event where you are dead set against the material. Do not attend her post-Mormon book clubs. You may want to spend more time with her, and she may want you to spend more time with her, but those are a world different from humoring her on a what-movie-shall-we-see discussion. Doing those things will only lead to your destruction. My guess is she would prefer to be married to you on her terms. Not a good way to be. You will need to find mutual ground and a lot of it if you want this marriage to work.

 

I'm sorry. I truly am. But she is making a lot of new choices and finding a new path and it's going to take some time. Don't expect the right answer immediately, but protect yourself.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Do not skip church to get coffee with her. Do not go to comedy clubs or any other event where you are dead set against the material. Do not attend her post-Mormon book clubs. You may want to spend more time with her, and she may want you to spend more time with her, but those are a world different from humoring her on a what-movie-shall-we-see discussion. Doing those things will only lead to your destruction. My guess is she would prefer to be married to you on her terms. Not a good way to be. You will need to find mutual ground and a lot of it if you want this marriage to work.

 

I'm sorry. I truly am. But she is making a lot of new choices and finding a new path and it's going to take some time. Don't expect the right answer immediately, but protect yourself.

 

If she wants to do activities with you (which is a good idea), there are plenty of options which don't involve church or comedy clubs.  A good movie?  Sports activity?  A day away from it all?  What do the two of you like to do?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Fast forward to tonight.  She let me know she was going to a comedy club with friends and that she would invite me but she didn't think I would like it as it is for 21 and older and there would be objectionable material.  She's right,  I don't want to go to a place like that.  She basically told me this is who she is now and there was nothing wrong with it.

 

I'm not handling this well.  I guess my real problem is that she has been spending a lot of time with her new friends and very little with me.  

 

A very tough road, my condolences; if she continues down this path it leads to nothing good. I just wonder where a mother of 5 has all the time to go to comedy clubs, book clubs, bars, etc. Your oldest can't be more than 12 and the youngest . . .maybe 5. That is still a lot of responsibility when they get home from school.

 

To some extent I can see the "robbed of her youth", if she gets married at 18-19 and directly starts a family then at 32 she thinks she never got to experience truly living on her own. Unfortunately, some people don't know how good they have it until they end up losing it all. If some of her new friends include members of the opposite sex  . . . well be prepared.

 
My suggestions, keep the faith brother, keep the faith.  Pray in your heart, mind, soul.  Have family prayer with your kids every night and invite your wife; read family scriptures every night. Teach them the things of God and patiently wait on the Lord.  Don't be the instigator of divorce . . .if she wants a divorce she can file for it. If she wants you to divorce her, she can certainly force your hand-i.e. she can commit adultery. Ultimately you are the head of the household and you have the authority to lead, preside and direct your family.
 
She has to figure her own way out of this and the best you can do is be supportive of her in figuring things out while still maintaining the Gospel in your life and in your children's lives. Finding some way to spend time with her in an environment that isn't Gospel centered but isn't clubs, bars, etc. will be important . . . a nice walk, go for some ice cream, etc. 
 
Oh and if it is going to work, both of you have to eliminate the outs . . .eliminate the thoughts of divorce and say together as a team, one of us has changed but we are still a team and as a team we are going to figure out how to make this work. If one is constantly thinking of moving on; it won't work too well.
Edited by yjacket
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Yjacket, she has time for those things because i'm ther to watch the kids. I think you are right about my not pushing divorce. Im going to pull back on that. Our oldest is 11 and our youngest is 16 months. Im not going to know my babies at all. Right now im begging her for counseling. I'll go to my own if it will help. The hard thing is watching her get dolled up in clothing she never would have worn before to go hang out with other people. I dont understand how she could have fallen this far so fast. Our poor kids are the ones who will truly suffer. They have a pretty good life right now but my wife truly believes it will be better after we are divorced if she and I work together to make it that way. Its a dream world she is living in.

Edited by 000Zero000
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
 Share