No refreshments allowed in baptisms?

[Guest]

From the training I received as a Bishop with Mission President. He asked all of us not to serve refreshments following a baptism. He wanted the convert to leave the baptism at the end remembering the feeling they had from being Baptised. I have bought into that since the day I heard it. Just my opinion.

This doesn't make sense to me. How does refreshments take away from the feeling of being baptized?

[David13]

Well, my convert baptism was Sunday.

Refreshments were served in the kitchen afterward.  There is a kitchen beside two huge gyms.  And there was everything, water, cupcakes, brownies cookies, at least a dozen items, which, sugar is not good for me.

It was good, I think, from my point of view.

Different people were involved in different aspects of the whole ceremony,  Maybe 50 people.  Music, speakers, witnesses, just the congregation watching, kids, and then it seemed like the refreshment committee was other people.  So I got to meet and talk to a lot more people.

Just more of the social aspect of it.

Just good reinforcement for me.

So I vote for refreshments, in the kitchen, if they have one, afterwards, or at someone's house.

dc

[Maureen]

This doesn't make sense to me. How does refreshments take away from the feeling of being baptized?

 

I'm the same as anatess. How would refreshments affect someone's spiritual experience after a baptism?

 

M.

[Bini]

I'm a germaphobe so I'm super sceptical about public refreshments and potlucks but it does seem a bit silly to me that a drink or cookie would take away a positive feeling or experience. Of course this is all a matter of opinion, it seems, I don't think there's a wrong or right answer necessarily. I always thought get-togethers post funeral services were a bit odd, in that people sat around and ate - visited - laughed even, right after burying someone in the ground. I dunno, it's a preference thing for sure depending on situation.

[Guest]

I always thought get-togethers post funeral services were a bit odd,

On the news last week is China's move to crack down on strippers and lewd shows at funerals...

[Bini]

Nu uh! Goodness.

[David13]

I used to have the germophobe idea, or some such.  But I now realize I can trust those people.  You trust any restaurant you go to, don't you, and the employees.  So why not your own brothers and sisters at the church?

As to the funerals.  Some people want a happy occasion for their funeral.  They want people to not be sad, but to have a good time;  comedians (pro or not) like to have a lot of jokes and all.

It's a celebrate of the passing to wherever they believe one passes to.  A better place?

It's part of the grieving process, a send off, a transition to not having the deceased in your life or your world anymore.

dc

[Bini]

David, if you're talking to me - nope - don't eat out. I'm also strict vegan so I prepare all my own food. But back to food handling issues, I don't even eat what family makes.

[Guest]

David, if you're talking to me - nope - don't eat out. I'm also strict vegan so I prepare all my own food. But back to food handling issues, I don't even eat what family makes.

You need psychiatric medication for that condition.

:D :D :D :D

Edited April 29, 2015 by anatess

[Bini]

Anatess, I'm super healthy and I credit my eating habits to that, but I'm a runner too. I think people would be surprised how much better they'd feel changing their diet.

Glad you got a chuckle out of that David.

[Guest]

Anatess, I'm super healthy and I credit my eating habits to that, but I'm a runner too. I think people would be surprised how much better they'd feel changing their diet.

Glad you got a chuckle out of that David.

I wasn't saying you need psychiatric medication for being vegan... I was saying you need psychiatric medication for being a germophobe. :D :D

[Bini]

^

 

You're not far off. I'm OCD definitely.

[pam]

I'm a germaphobe so I'm super sceptical about public refreshments and potlucks but it does seem a bit silly to me that a drink or cookie would take away a positive feeling or experience. Of course this is all a matter of opinion, it seems, I don't think there's a wrong or right answer necessarily. I always thought get-togethers post funeral services were a bit odd, in that people sat around and ate - visited - laughed even, right after burying someone in the ground. I dunno, it's a preference thing for sure depending on situation.

 

I know a few people that have the same thoughts about get togethers after a funeral.  My thoughts are...funerals really are more for the ones that are still living. Sure we bury someone...but it's really more that the rest of us can show our respect for the person we lost.  That also includes sharing good times, laughs, food, etc.  To me it's all part of the grieving process.

[EarlJibbs]

In my ward here in TX, it seems we always have refreshments after convert baptisms. I think it offers the person getting baptized a chance to meet those who are supporting them. In our experience, this appears to have added to the service, not detracted. The baptized looked overjoyed to talk to everyone and feel that the ward was placing their choice as the center of attention. I suppose you don't need a snack to do this, but it certainly doesn't hurt. 

 

Since I wanted more than just cookies and punch for my sons baptism, I invited select families back to my house for more of a meal. 

 

Now, if I were to advertise that brisket and ribs were to be catered to the church afterward, although that would be delicious, it would over the top.  

[Guest]

Now, if I were to advertise that brisket and ribs were to be catered to the church afterward, although that would be delicious, it would over the top.

Is it because you announced it? Or is it because it's brisket and ribs?

I don't understand the line...

Both my sons' baptisms were held in the Atlantic ocean and we rented the beach house for a week with several ward members staying over multiple days... celebration went on and on and on.

[askandanswer]

I wasn't saying you need psychiatric medication for being vegan... I was saying you need psychiatric medication for being a germophobe. :D :D

 

Who would prepare the medication?

[askandanswer]

I've never come across any restriction on post-baptismal refreshments. I agree with those who have said its for the Ward Mission Leader, with the approval of the bishop, and not the RSP to decide how baptisms should happen. In our ward, the question of whether or not there will be refreshments is usually up to to organiser of the event. In the case of convert baptisms, that's usually the WML, and he sees post baptismal refreshments as a great way for any non-members the baptismal candidate may have invited to mix with the members. In the case of member baptisms, then its usually up to the parents, and most, but not all parents, will organise for refreshments. Even when the baptism is taking place on a Sunday at a time when the other ward is using the chapel, there will still be post baptism refreshments.

[EarlJibbs]

Is it because you announced it? Or is it because it's brisket and ribs?

I don't understand the line...

Both my sons' baptisms were held in the Atlantic ocean and we rented the beach house for a week with several ward members staying over multiple days... celebration went on and on and on.

 

I think my humor was lost Anatess, or more likely I didnt convey it well enough :) . I was saying that I would understand a rule restricting food at the church after a baptism IF one was to announce that they were going to cater ribs and brisket at the church for everyone that came.  I didn't actually do this. All we did was simple sandwiches and kolaches at my house. 

Edited April 30, 2015 by EarlJibbs

[NightSG]

One caveat: certainly the RS Pres has say in what kind of sign-up sheets get passed around in the Sunday meeting over which she presides. She can't keep the refreshments out of the building; but I think it would be ill-advised to ask the RS to formally assume responsibility for the food now that the Pres has demurred (individuals who happen to be in the RS--sure; but not the organization itself).

 

Meh.  Forget RS snacks.  Cookies and juice get old pretty quick.  When our Priesthood provides refreshments, it's barbecue.  :)

[dahlia]

From the training I received as a Bishop with Mission President. He asked all of us not to serve refreshments following a baptism. He wanted the convert to leave the baptism at the end remembering the feeling they had from being Baptised. I have bought into that since the day I heard it. Just my opinion.

Jeesh.  I was happy to meet members of my ward at the reception. People showed up that I didn't know, but who became good friends. I was surprised that people would come to see a stranger get baptized and then share that good feeling afterward. My experience at my baptism has been one of the primary reasons I have gone to almost every convert baptism in my ward.

 

How different we all are and how differently we perceive experience.

[David13]

I was very happy also with the refreshments.  That's when it occurred to me how many people  were coming out to this occasion.

I'd like to go to the convert baptisms myself, but I don't know if we have had any since mine.

I need to find out where that info is listed so I can attend.

dc

[Saint Peter]

Well I think refreshments should be had. A main reason for a baptismal service: "A baptismal service offers the opportunity to find and encourage other investigators. Converts should be encouraged to invite their family members, other relatives, and friends. Church leaders and missionaries may also invite other investigators who are being taught, potential investigators, and leaders and members who will be working with the new members. Other ward members may also attend."

https://www.lds.org/handbook/handbook-2-administering-the-church/priesthood-ordinances-and-blessings?lang=eng&query=20.3.4#20.3.4

 

I feel like the best way to fellowship these non-members who attend are afterward with food. They can mingle with the WML and missionaries. They can make friends. If people quickly leave after the baptism, then they won't get as big of a chance to meet people. Also if the refreshments were served at someones house, honestly the non-members won't show up to that persons house for food. It was lucky enough that they came to the baptism. So as far as missionary opportunities go, I say refreshments and mingling should be encouraged.

[NightSG]

I feel like the best way to fellowship these non-members who attend are afterward with food. They can mingle with the WML and missionaries. They can make friends. If people quickly leave after the baptism, then they won't get as big of a chance to meet people. Also if the refreshments were served at someones house, honestly the non-members won't show up to that persons house for food. It was lucky enough that they came to the baptism. So as far as missionary opportunities go, I say refreshments and mingling should be encouraged.

 

This, plus you're going to have people who didn't eat on the way, and having some food there postpones the "I'm starving so I'm getting out of here."

 

Frankly, having a full meal (potluck, barbecue or a combination thereof) would likely draw more people in to begin with, and keep them around for as much as an extra hour.

[dahlia]

https://www.pinterest.com/pin/314900198919283571/

[rmlds2000]

When I was on my mission, my mission president went to a training meeting with President Boyd K. Packer.  He taught them that a baptismal service should be simple, brief (about 30 min), and spiritual.  He taught them that it should be organized and conducted in such a way that the focus is on the ordinance of baptism.  Handbook 2 is consistent with these principles.  President Packer explained that after the baptismal service, people should leave the church with the imagery of the baptismal ordinance still fresh on their minds while they ponder the symbolism and significance of this ordinance.  While he did not address refreshments specifically, he said they should leave the church right afterwards to have this experience.  Prolonging the experience at the church with refreshments and lots of visiting is generally counter-productive to this goal.  Inviting family and friends to a home afterwards for food and visiting is a great alternative that still allows us to focus on imagery, symbolism, and significance of the ordinance as we leave the church building.  That is what I've been taught, for what it's worth.