Hi, new & need perspective

[Guest MormonGator]

The lack of impulse control with an ADHD person is truly a problem. They don't foresee consequences and tend to react

with a very angry response if held in accountability. Angry because they got caught!

You are right. Speaking as someone who has an Attention Deficit Disorder, I can tell you it's taken me years to learn this.

 

I think it's more of a emotional outburst like sadness than anger though.  

[Bee Sweet]

Sorry about the anger comment, that was insensitive. Yes, sadness and frustration.

 

IN getting back to the subject,

 

It seems we tend to ignore what a woman goes through after discovering pornography use by her husband.

It causes anxiety, self-evaluation, ( am I good enough?) lack of trust, checking cell phone records, internet history,

it brings the relationship to its knees. I've read that it compares to post traumatic shock syndrome.

[Wonderingwhy]

I am the wife of a porn addict.  Been married for over 30 years.  The vibe of the advice given here to love and love some more is good advice, to be sure.  But when the cycle repeats itself over and over and over, it is heartbreaking and soul breaking.  I weep for the women who just keep being told to love some more.  It seems like taking care of the spouse is more important than taking care of yourself.  Service and compassion are things that have gotten me through all of these years of being married to a good man that I don't know how to trust.  It seems like people think that having a man who provides you a house and doesn't beat you should be enough to get you through and you should be grateful.  That's what I have. My husband lost his job over a decade ago because of porn.  He's been blessed with another good job and has provided a house and comforts that I am grateful for.  However, he continues to take risks with porn.  Consequently, lack of trust on my part.  People say, forgive, but you don't have to trust.  What do you have then?  

 

I feel for the sisters who are dealing with this problem.  Agony and heartache.  From what I've seen, there is very little peace in the lives of women going through this experience.  We keep on, keeping on, never knowing for sure if we can believe our husbands and what they say.  We lean on the Lord, a lot.  It sure would be nice to lean on our husbands too.