Husband claiming to be transgender

[Fatkittycat]

I recently found out my husband has been contacting the LGBT community about his feelings toward being transgender.  He went as far as going to the doctor for a "wellness visit" where he was given Hormone Replacement Therapy to become physically more like a woman.  This was all done without my knowledge.  I found the drugs under the bed while I was cleaning the floor.  I feel so betrayed by his actions, and don't know how to handle the situation.  I have gone to a counselor a couple of times, but the counselor is very liberal in his beliefs.  Does anyone know where the church stands on this topic?  I just don't feel like it is right?   Does anyone know where I can go to get some advice and support?

 

[Guest MormonGator]

Go to a bishop or a stake president for advice. Set up an appointment as soon as you can. I'm so proud of you for seeing a bias in the current counselor. Perhaps you both can agree to see another one? 

 

I am so sorry. You are in my prayers.  

(I am unsure of church teaching on transgenderism. I have no idea) 

Edited October 16, 2015 by MormonGator

[NeuroTypical]

Oh wow.  My heart goes out to you, Fatkittycat.  There's a lot going on here, and I fear none of it will have a very easy time getting resolved.  I echo the advice to go see your bishop/branch president.

 

Do you have any children?

[Fatkittycat]

I have children from a previous marriage. They are 19 and 15. My husband is very defiant when I try to talk to him about this. I have so many crazy emotions right now. I feel betrayed, resentful, and depressed. I spend much time crying. Just wondering if anyone out there has had this challenge.

[Latter-Day Marriage]

I recently found out my husband has been contacting the LGBT community about his feelings toward being transgender.  He went as far as going to the doctor for a "wellness visit" where he was given Hormone Replacement Therapy to become physically more like a woman.  This was all done without my knowledge.  I found the drugs under the bed while I was cleaning the floor.  I feel so betrayed by his actions, and don't know how to handle the situation.  I have gone to a counselor a couple of times, but the counselor is very liberal in his beliefs.  Does anyone know where the church stands on this topic?  I just don't feel like it is right?   Does anyone know where I can go to get some advice and support?

I doubt you are the only one who has had to go through this and I'm sorry for your pain.

Church policy is that elective transsexual operations are grounds for church discipline, and a member who has undergone such an operation may not receive a temple recommend.  Investigators who have had an operation like that need clearance from the First Presidency to get baptized.  Homosexual activity is breaking the law of chastity and I'm pretty sure it doesn't matter how you are dressing at the time.  If he is just dressing like a woman and taking hormones I don't think the church would take formal discipline but the Bishop should be aware I think and I encourage you to see your Bishop as the others have suggested.

 

[NeedleinA]

Does anyone know where I can go to get some advice and support?

 

I agree with what others have said. Speak to your Bishop and great job in recognizing that not all counselors/therapist are a match for your needs. If you haven't already, when you speak to your Bishop, ask him if you have LDS Family Services in your in area. There you should be able to find a LDS therapist to complement the gospel. In my opinion, your best chance for success in a instance like this is going to come from three areas:

1. Your prayers and direct inspiration from the Holy Ghost/Heavenly Father

2. Your spiritual perspective and faith building from your Bishop

3. Your marital skills to either work through or part ways with your husband from your therapist.

 

Best of luck!

[JojoBag]

I recently found out my husband has been contacting the LGBT community about his feelings toward being transgender.  He went as far as going to the doctor for a "wellness visit" where he was given Hormone Replacement Therapy to become physically more like a woman.  This was all done without my knowledge.  I found the drugs under the bed while I was cleaning the floor.  I feel so betrayed by his actions, and don't know how to handle the situation.  I have gone to a counselor a couple of times, but the counselor is very liberal in his beliefs.  Does anyone know where the church stands on this topic?  I just don't feel like it is right?   Does anyone know where I can go to get some advice and support?

 

I strongly recommend you read this paper by Ron Poulton.  http://tamarasbook.blogspot.com/2008/12/fascinating-paper-on-evil-spirits.html

[Bini]

I recently found out my husband has been contacting the LGBT community about his feelings toward being transgender.  He went as far as going to the doctor for a "wellness visit" where he was given Hormone Replacement Therapy to become physically more like a woman.  This was all done without my knowledge.  I found the drugs under the bed while I was cleaning the floor.  I feel so betrayed by his actions, and don't know how to handle the situation.  I have gone to a counselor a couple of times, but the counselor is very liberal in his beliefs.  Does anyone know where the church stands on this topic?  I just don't feel like it is right?   Does anyone know where I can go to get some advice and support?

 

These topics really hit close to home for me and not because I'm "liberal" but because I do have people IN my life that live with the challenges of being LGBT. For an individual who has postponed seeking information or help regarding suppressed feelings, such as same-sex sexuality or gender identification, it's a super scary situation and likely not one they're openly going to discuss right off the bat. Even with close friends, family, and yes, even spouses. I understand your feelings of betrayal and frustration, but I'd urge you to continue being loving and listen to whatever your husband needs to say, when he is ready. I'm certain he's not feeling all that fantastic, either, not with how LGBT's are viewed by outsiders.

 

I agree with others, find a support system, and start having those tough discussions about living with a loved one who is homosexual or transgender. I should add, transgender is the transition from one sex to the other, but is not limited to one sexual preference. There are transgender gays, lesbians, bisexuals, and heterosexuals. It's a lot to comprehend and gather but if you're wanting to at least learn what your husband might be dealing with, there are plenty of resources for family members to read up on, groups to join, where you can find that helpful information. You don't have to agree with it, it's just info in explaining a little bit in what LGBT folks are going through.

Good luck. Be a friend, be a lover, and be patient.

[Fatkittycat]

I feel his behavior is taking away from the spirit in our home. He spends hours looking at transsexual pornography. He no longer sees homosexuality as wrong. He has gone as far as believing parents should be forced to administer hormone therapy to their children if the government thinks it is necessary. He constantly fights with my children. I feel like I am walking on eggshells. I to,d him he was handsome the other day and he was upset with me. He says I should be loyal and yet he is contacting total strangers and offering to send pictures of him in his panties and stockings. He contacted a lady on Craigslist who likes transsexual men. Then he says I'm not loyal because I won't support his decisions. He wants me to be attracted to a female body. I am not attracted to women. He makes me feel guilty for being straight and normal. He personally attacks me any time I try to talk to him about my feelings. I feel so hopeless. I am scared to go to my bishop. If my husband finds out, he will be outraged.

[Fatkittycat]

Jojobas, thank you so much for sharing. The story of Robert hit home for me.

[Latter-Day Marriage]

I feel his behavior is taking away from the spirit in our home. He spends hours looking at transsexual pornography. He no longer sees homosexuality as wrong. He has gone as far as believing parents should be forced to administer hormone therapy to their children if the government thinks it is necessary. He constantly fights with my children. I feel like I am walking on eggshells. I to,d him he was handsome the other day and he was upset with me. He says I should be loyal and yet he is contacting total strangers and offering to send pictures of him in his panties and stockings. He contacted a lady on Craigslist who likes transsexual men. Then he says I'm not loyal because I won't support his decisions. He wants me to be attracted to a female body. I am not attracted to women. He makes me feel guilty for being straight and normal. He personally attacks me any time I try to talk to him about my feelings. I feel so hopeless. I am scared to go to my bishop. If my husband finds out, he will be outraged.

Let him be outraged then. Are you  not outraged at his behaviour?  You need to take action for the sake of you children and yourself.  If you fear for your physical safety you need to get yourself and the kids to a safe haven pronto.

[Backroads]

So, he's pretty much cheating in your marriage and you're the one in the wrong? I don't think his behavior is anywhere near the "confused path of self-identification". Talk to your bishop and let your husband deal with it.

Edited October 25, 2015 by Backroads

[Jane_Doe]

He spends hours looking at.... pornography.   ...   He contacted a lady on Craigslist who likes transsexual men.

 

In my opinion, this is cheating (doesn't matter if its trans or straight)

 

 

 Then he says I'm not loyal because I won't support his decisions.

 

Which decision?  The decision to cheat?  To lie to you?  Being loyal to your husband does not mean auto-matically saying "yes, sir" to everything he does/says.

[JojoBag]

Jojobas, thank you so much for sharing. The story of Robert hit home for me.

 

The last thing the LDS consider when it comes to their trials and problems in life is the relationship of evil spirits and their effect on those trials in spite of the teachings of the church that the Devil is the source of all evil in this world. To the above average LDS, all Satan does is tempt and influence. I'm willing to bet that he loves this interpretation. The single most clever thing Satan has done is to convince people he doesn't exist.

 

For many LDS, he has convinced them that he's mostly a symbol of evil who only tempts and influences. The idea is that what we are really dealing with is nothing more than the evil passions of men. Satan doesn't really have anything to do with that; people can just be bad. And, when it comes to homosexuality, we are just born that way. Again, I'm willing to bet that Satan snickers when he hears that. I, personally, know different.

 

I am a male survivor of rape; it started when I was a little boy and continued for about 4 or 5 years. Consequently, I developed serious homosexual feelings that stayed with me most of my life. I'm not going to go into all that happened since it would fill up a book. I was healed from this and a couple other serious problems by my bishop.

 

My wife had been telling me for nearly a year that I was possessed by evil spirits. Although I didn't tell her of my predilection for homosexuality, she knew and kept trying to get me to get help. Finally, after a year I listened to her and went to my bishop. He gave me a blessing after I told him of my wife's suspicions. He then proceeded to cast out several evil spirits from me. When he said the words, “Jesus Christ,” I felt what I can only describe as an angry boiling sensation churn up inside me and then was expelled from my body. I felt them leave. I have never been the same since.  Any interest I had in homosexuality left with the evil spirits.

 

I have spent many hours researching the subject of evil spirits since then and here is what I have learned and deduced. When possessed, you give up part of your free agency. And, because the victim doesn't know he is possessed, he takes on the characteristics and attributes of the spirits possessing him. He has weird and strange thoughts, feels weird and abnormal things and thinks they are his own thoughts and feelings because it comes from within him. The victim doesn't realize that it is the thoughts and feelings of the evil spirit.

 

Here are some teachings from Parley P. Pratt.

 

“Many spirits of the departed, who are unhappy, linger in lonely wretchedness about the earth, and in the air, and especially about their ancient homesteads, and the places rendered dear to them by the memory of former scenes. The more wicked of these are the kind spoken of in Scripture, as "foul spirits," "unclean spirits," spirits who afflict persons in the flesh, and engender various diseases in the human system. They will sometimes enter human bodies, and will distract them, throw them into fits, cast them into the water, into the fire, etc. They will trouble them with dreams, nightmare, hysterics, fever, etc. They will also deform them in body and in features, by convulsions, cramps, contortions, etc., and will sometimes compel them to utter blasphemies, horrible curses, and even words of other languages. If permitted, they will often cause death. Some of these spirits are adulterous, and suggest to the mind all manner of lasciviousness, all kinds of evil thoughts and temptations.”

***

“There are, in fact, most awful instances of the spirit of lust, and of bawdy and abominable words and actions, inspired and uttered by persons possessed of such spirits, even though the persons were virtuous and modest so long as they possessed their own agency.

 

Some of these spirits cause deafness, others dumbness, etc.”

“Key to the Science of Theology,” Pgs. 110-111

Parley P. Pratt

 

 

Everything we know about evils spirits was originally taught by Joseph Smith. In fact, Elder Pratt got the title for his book from the Lectures on Faith when Joseph Smith said that “faith is truly the first principle in the science of theology....” (Lectures on Faith, Lecture Seventh, Pg. 62) In 1853, the Deseret News had editorials on how not to become possessed. In his book, “Gospel Truth, Vol. 1” Elder George Q. Cannon taught that the spirit of anger, lust, adultery, theft, etc., were all evil spirits who were assigned those specific tasks by Satan.

 

When it comes to homosexuality, here is what I have concluded based on what I have researched and my own experience. This is my own conclusion and not taught by the Church or anyone else. Open homosexuality is first a weakness or curiosity in homosexuality or cross dressing, etc. This weakness is exploited when that person then becomes possessed by an evil spirit of the opposite sex. The victim thinks all these thoughts and feelings are his own, but are actually the thoughts and feelings of the evil spirit possessing him.

 

I strongly recommend that you do your own research and reach your own conclusions. Here are some sites for you to look at.

 

http://gospelink.com/ This is my top site for research. It costs $5 a month but it's worth every penny. You can look up just about anything gospel related. If you put in “evil spirits” in the search box, it brings back 1196 pages of references.

 

http://www.lds-general-conference.org/x.asp This site is from BYU and you can search every general conference ever published from 1880. It has a tutorial and I recommend you watch it before using it.

 

http://jod.mrm.org/1 This site is a searchable Journal of Discourses. It is on an anti-Mormon web site, but it's the best site I've found for searching the JOD.

 

https://archive.org/index.php From this site you can download public domain copies of every single conference report ever printed, all the older church magazines, newspapers and books pre-1970, many old books published by early church leaders, the Journal of Discourses (26 vol), History of the Church vols 1-7 and much, much more. In the search box, preface your searches with, “The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.”

 

When you do your own research, keep an open mind.  I have found with many LDS that they have ideas they think are "doctrine," but are actually based on tradition and/or secular education and not the truth.  It's the philosophy of men mingled with Mormonism.  If you reach the same conclusions that I've reached and you decide to try and discuss with others what you've learned, you will be mocked, ridiculed and scoffed at.  Be warned.

[Latter-Day Marriage]

I have no doubt that unclean spirits are a real thing, and do factor into some cases of mental illness etc.  I had a pretty freaky experience on my mission I believe related to that as well.  (Anybody every have light bulb that has been on for while explode in such a way that it only blew out a penny sized hole in the side and left the rest of the bulb intact?)  But I don't think you can say all such cases are due to unclean spirits, and there is no way to medically diagnose it. 

[Guest]

I'm kind of in the same school of thought as LDM.  But in this particular case as described, I wouldn't rule it out.  It sounds like pretty freaky behavior from the description over the internet.

 

EDIT: I mean I wouldn't rule out evil spirits in this case.

Edited October 26, 2015 by Guest

[JojoBag]

I have no doubt that unclean spirits are a real thing, and do factor into some cases of mental illness etc.  I had a pretty freaky experience on my mission I believe related to that as well.  (Anybody every have light bulb that has been on for while explode in such a way that it only blew out a penny sized hole in the side and left the rest of the bulb intact?)  But I don't think you can say all such cases are due to unclean spirits, and there is no way to medically diagnose it. 

 

There are no medical tests that can diagnose most mental illnesses.  If there is actual brain damage that can be seen on an MRI or CT scan, that's different.  There also are observations that seem to be pretty universal, however, there is no way to test the actual brain chemicals themselves.  Doctors are shoveling psychiatric drugs down people's throats without really knowing what the true problem is other than by observation.  The idea that there is a problem with the serotonin levels is simply a theory, nothing more. 

 

To say that a person is born homosexual is totally wrong.  Our spirit determines our personality and our gender.  Elder Packer said, “Your gender was determined in the premortal existence. You were born a male [or female]. You must treasure and protect the masculine [or feminine] part of your nature.” (Ensign, May 2009, Pg. 50)

 

And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them. (Ether 12:27)

 

Homosexuality is nothing more than a spiritual weakness that we must overcome.  It has nothing to do with our body.

 

Edited October 26, 2015 by JojoBag

[Latter-Day Marriage]

 

There are no medical tests that can diagnose most mental illnesses.  If there is actual brain damage that can be seen on an MRI or CT scan, that's different.  There also are observations that seem to be pretty universal, however, there is no way to test the actual brain chemicals themselves.  Doctors are shoveling psychiatric drugs down people's throats without really knowing what the true problem is other than by observation.  The idea that there is a problem with the serotonin levels is simply a theory, nothing more. 

 

To say that a person is born homosexual is totally wrong.  Our spirit determines our personality and our gender.  Elder Packer said, “Your gender was determined in the premortal existence. You were born a male [or female]. You must treasure and protect the masculine [or feminine] part of your nature.” (Ensign, May 2009, Pg. 50)

 

And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them. (Ether 12:27)

 

Homosexuality is nothing more than a spiritual weakness that we must overcome.  It has nothing to do with our body.

 

 

My point was there are diagnostic tools for mental illness but not for being afflicted with unclean spirits.  Treatment of mental illness is certainly more art than science at this point, but if a significant portion of cases are rooted in a spiritual cause rather than a medical one it will be hard to get to the point of there being solid science on mental illness.

 

I wouldn't paint with too broad a brush when it comes to homosexuality.  I agree it is not matter of a person being born 'in the wrong body' but I expect there are multiple ways a person can wind up in that situation.  In some cases it seems to be a psychological defense mechanism against the trauma of childhood sexual abuse.

[Lazarus]

I am going to have to say that it seems this story is statistically more likely to be made up by you then for real, so I am calling you out on it.   To others, reading this post: just because someone says something, doesn't mean that we should believe it with out any evidence whatsoever provided.

[Blackmarch]

I feel his behavior is taking away from the spirit in our home. He spends hours looking at transsexual pornography. He no longer sees homosexuality as wrong. He has gone as far as believing parents should be forced to administer hormone therapy to their children if the government thinks it is necessary. He constantly fights with my children. I feel like I am walking on eggshells. I to,d him he was handsome the other day and he was upset with me. He says I should be loyal and yet he is contacting total strangers and offering to send pictures of him in his panties and stockings. He contacted a lady on Craigslist who likes transsexual men. Then he says I'm not loyal because I won't support his decisions. He wants me to be attracted to a female body. I am not attracted to women. He makes me feel guilty for being straight and normal. He personally attacks me any time I try to talk to him about my feelings. I feel so hopeless. I am scared to go to my bishop. If my husband finds out, he will be outraged.

 

I feel so sorry for you . This is my 2 cents, I'd say get info from the professionals who deal with this sort of stuff, but this sort of thing can get real scary fast. (and do what those professionals say)

My first concern would be for the safety of the children, and then you. You'll probably have to stand up for yourself to him.

A big question I have is he willing to go with you to a counselor and sit down and have a big heart to heart talk (you'll have to be clear on your position, values etc.. )?

Go to the bishop, definitely let him know the situation. I'd also say find a legal Counselor and a marriage counselor. I'd also say have a charged cellphone on you at all times and the next time your husband blows up on you, call 911.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

If your husband isn't willing to seek help from marriage counseliing or the church I don't think there is much the church can do for him other than offer prayers.... But they probably could help you out in as either support, or at least in helping direct you to decent therapists. If he's willing to make an effort in improving the relationship then there is probably reason enough to fight to keep it together. Definitely you will want to let the Bishop know and ask him if he has any resources to help you. Also when explaining your situation ttry to be more detailed than vague.

But keep a very careful watch, there may come a point where you have to seperate yourself and the kids from him physically.

I wouldn't attribute his behavior to unclean spirits beyond anything to what all are generally subject to or how such are able to give thoughts to men or desires in their hearts- in this case I'd wager that all a spirit had to do was convince him to take a peek at something titillating for him in some manner, it generally snowballs from there on its own...

porn will rewire your brain pretty significantly over time, things that were external and unwanted at one point will become desirable and intenalized and even feel like they were part of you all along. If he's looking at porn, that is going to be a major major impediment that is not easily done away with.

yes he does need help but until he desires it or sees the need for therapy, there's not much another can get him to go to if he doesn't want to. It's possible he may not wake up from what he's doing until he's either in the emergency room or in jail.

on a side note it might be a good idea to keep a journal of related incidents, just in case things do go south and you end up having to go to court.

Edited November 16, 2015 by Blackmarch

[Athena9]

I just saw this because as of yesterday I just joined this community. Sweetheart, I can't say how 

SORRY I am for you; such a situation!   In NO WAY are you responsible for this, OK?  (Repeat that a 

couple of times) .  Your BISHOP is there to HELP  and SUPPORT you is situations JUST LIKE THIS. WHY should he feel ANYTHING other than COMPASSION and SORROW --- for YOU?  If your so-called husband were having a Heterosexual  AFFAIR, it WOULD NOT be ANY DIFFERENT.  He is being GROSSLY UNFAITHFUL to YOU and YOUR FAMILY.

 

Hey,  I am an adult convert. I didn't grown up in the Church, so I feel I have the benefit of BOTH perspectives. FORGET THINKING about your seriously "ill" husband;  Honey, you NEED to start thinking about YOU and your KIDS. This GUY has ALL the SIGNS of a man becoming DOMESTICALLY VIOLENT and I am very sorry, but you are going to HAVE TO START CONSIDERING THAT, TOO. You NEED a PLAN for WHAT TO DO THERE --- your BISHOP can help with THAT, also. Bishops in the LDS CHURCH are TRAINED to do things just like THIS, and do IT ALL of the TIME. 

 

I so regret to tell you that your mate has gone over to the "other side,"  for who knows what reasons,

WHICH DO NOT MATTER. AND ARE NOT YOUR FAULT. YOU CAN"T DO ANYTHING ABOUT THEM

EITHER.  We shall PRAY he DOES REPENT and that he AVAILS himself of the Church provision of a

"COURT OF LOVE,"  so that he can GET HELP FOR HIMSELF, and be HEALED  of what has lately been plaguing him.   This is something that IS NOT NEW to the LDS CHURCH, believe it or NOT.  YOU can 

also ASK to go to the COUNSELOR (which is CONFIDENTIAL) at LDS SOCIAL SERVICES.  UNFORTUNATELY, NONE of this can happen unless you GO TO YOUR BISHOP and RIGHT AWAY. 

God be with you, Luv.... Here's my beloved husband: 

 

 

If HE WON'T give up the Transgender Stuff, he HAS TO GO. I hate  to be THAT COLD, but we're DEALING with PORNOGRAPHY around your CHILDREN and the possibility that 

 you could get AIDES.  My Dear Husband was an ADULT CONVERT TO the Church, like me. In the military, he was all over the World , so HE IS a very knowledgeable man besides a priesthood holder. 

He' going to share HIS PERSPECTIVE with you, also, as he SHARES my CONCERN. 

 

Hi!  I was in New York with the USCG and one day while visiting a friend or so I thought, that evening after getting back from a party, we were just about to nodd off, I being on the floor in a sleeping bag..!hen he said..."Jim...What would you do if I jumped out of bed and raped you?"  Shocked,I told him "it wouldn't be a wise thing to do!" and being bigger than myself, I just told him...Jerry!  "If you did, you would have to kill me, and if you didn't, I would get up and kick your brains in!"  At that point, I realized that these perverts are not hand holding, cheek kissing friends!  They are predators, and need to be eradicated!  Now about your perverted husband...Go see your home teachers, and tell them your plight, and next Sunday, corner your Bishop and tell your story to him!  Your husband in not just sick, he is dangerous to you and possibly children and others he comes in contact with!  Take it to your Stake President as soon as possible!  Tonight would be just fine!  He needs to be stopped!  YESTERDAY!  I wish you the best, or at least a better husband!....James Humberg, USCG DIsabled Veteran 1969-1978...Honorable Dischanged!

[unixknight]

Whatever you do, do NOT succumb to the guilt trip being laid upon you for failing to be supportive of this nonsense.  Pop culture would have you (and the rest of us) believe that the only correct response to his behavior is to encourage it without question, support his every whim and desire enthusiastically, and make whatever changes to your lifestyle, morality and beliefs it takes to spare him from even the tiniest scrap of shame for what he's doing.

 

And if it isn't painfully obvious what the REAL source of that mentality is...

 

He's wrong.  Full stop.  Even if transgenderism were natural (which it isn't) the simple fact that your feelings are being dismissed and villified should tell you all you need to know about the ethical part of it.  You married a man who made a commitment to you to BE A MAN.  Now he wants to back out, not only on the being a man part, but on the being faithful part, and you're supposed to just go with it like somehow he's achieved something great and wonderful for you as a couple.  Absurd.

 

Keep praying, see the Bishop, and get an emotional support network behind you.  In this day and age, with so many others just breathlessly waiting to congratulate him for his "courage" (as if giving in to lust and temptation were at all courageous) he will probably never feel enough shame to steer him off the course he's set.  Hang in there. 

[believingisachoice]

I'm sorry you had to go through that. I hope you find peace.

[Quietnsmall]

Fatkittycat can I ask what you decided to do? Are you still in the marriage? Have you left? I am going through almost the same thing. Please help. 

[pam]

21 minutes ago, Quietnsmall said:

Fatkittycat can I ask what you decided to do? Are you still in the marriage? Have you left? I am going through almost the same thing. Please help. 

I doubt you will get a response.   That person hasn't been on the site since January of 2016.