Faith promoting stories: having children but money is tight


macaroon
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It's a commandment to multiply and replenish the earth. I believe the Lord will provide a way. But, the Lord will help those who help themselves. To me that means the parents have learned the skills to provide not only for themselves but for their children. And, I agree with Anatess, we don't always need XYZ to have children. IMO, the biggest component of providing for a family, whether there are children or not, is shelter. If there is a home then food and clothing can be economically provided. Children do not need their own bedroom. Rooms can be shared--even beds. In our current culture that seems to be so taboo, but it has been the norm for ages. Growing up, I shared a bedroom and the same bed with an older sister. I admit, my older sister probably didn't appreciate sharing with a younger sister, but that was life back then.

I have an uncle and aunt who had 14 children and lived in a small two bedroom house. They probably could have afforded a larger home because they had a good income, but they chose to stay in their small house. They retrofitted the back porch into another bedroom, and then when the boys were teenagers, they fixed up the largish shed outside into two bedrooms. One of the boys even fixed up the attic for bedroom space. Their home was the cool place to be. I loved visiting them. Also, keep in mind, by the time the younger children were born, some of the older children were already young adults and living on their own. Their home was sometimes a little chaotic, but love abounded, and I don't think any of them would have had it any other way.

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14 hours ago, anatess2 said:

Please, please, please... don't write checks you have no money in the bank for.  That's fraud.  You can go to jail.

I also can't help but think that we do have so many options for those struggling to pay the essential bills. 

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16 hours ago, anatess2 said:

Please, please, please... don't write checks you have no money in the bank for.  That's fraud.  You can go to jail.

I thought I said that.

On 6/17/2016 at 7:13 AM, Carborendum said:

I caution people not to depend on this type of miracle happening (thou shalt not tempt the Lord thy God)...

Her entire household is blessed time and time again with miracles to balance out the many trials they've had in their lives.

Sheesh!  You guys just get so shocked that you forget the details.

20 hours ago, Carborendum said:

... miracles only happen after all we can do.  

... sometimes when the need is great enough,
the trial hard enough,
and the faith is sufficient,

Miracles can happen after we've done all we can do.

But then that doesn't really matter does it?  Most of you don't believe it ever happened, so why even make such disclaimers on a fraud?  Ok.  I'll stop telling any more "faith promoting stories" even when people ask for them.

Edited by Guest
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Guest MormonGator
7 minutes ago, Carborendum said:

I thought I said that.

 

We're just worried about you Carb. We know you've already done 10 years in the slammer so you've got priors.  Three strikes and you are out after all! 

(Just playing everyone) 

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2 minutes ago, MormonGator said:

We're just worried about you Carb. We know you've already done 10 years in the slammer so you've got priors.  Three strikes and you are out after all! 

Have you checked my profile recently?

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16 minutes ago, Carborendum said:

I thought I said that.

Sheesh!  You guys just get so shocked that you forget the details.

But then that doesn't really matter does it?  Most of you don't believe it ever happened, so why even make such disclaimers on a fraud?  Ok.  I'll stop telling any more "faith promoting stories" even when people ask for them.

My argument is that it is not a faith promoting story. It is misleading, a better story would be that a stranger saw her in need and gave her 5k, or her employer gave her a big bonus for all of her hard work and it got her over the hump on bills and such. 

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In the early days of my marriage...  We have a budget that would not stay out of the red.  My wife and I were both quite concerned and did everything we could think of to cut back and to increase income...  But the budget forecast was always diving into the red. However... every time it came to pay out on our bills the money was in the account.  Sometimes it was a bill being less expensive then predicted or maybe some kind of unexpected income would come in...  This went on long enough, consistently enough, for me to gain an appreciation for the fact while I was managing my money I was definitively not doing so alone (as long as I was praying for help that is)

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58 minutes ago, omegaseamaster75 said:

My argument is that it is not a faith promoting story. It is misleading, a better story would be that a stranger saw her in need and gave her 5k, or her employer gave her a big bonus for all of her hard work and it got her over the hump on bills and such. 

But that would be a work of fiction in Carb's case unless that's actually happened.

The man's just relaying the events. Save the story criticism for a fiction site.

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56 minutes ago, omegaseamaster75 said:

My argument is that it is not a faith promoting story. It is misleading, a better story would be that a stranger saw her in need and gave her 5k, or her employer gave her a big bonus for all of her hard work and it got her over the hump on bills and such. 

I don't know about better.  But that simply isn't what happened.  The bottom line is that you simply don't believe it happened.  Ok.  I get it.  You don't believe it ever happened.  I'm not going to force you to.  But for you to now suggest that I recant and "sell" a different story is on the order of the Pharisees telling the blind man healed by Christ that he was never blind to begin with.

Are miracles like this really so uncommon that they seem impossible to believe?  I haven't had this particular miracle happen to me.  But I did have a miracle a little more powerful than what Estradling describes above.

I've also had many other Miracles happen in my life that I have no problem believing things like this.  If Jesus can multiply loaves and fishes, is it so impossible for him to do something to a bank account that seem miraculous?

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39 minutes ago, Carborendum said:

I don't know about better.  But that simply isn't what happened.  The bottom line is that you simply don't believe it happened.  Ok.  I get it.  You don't believe it ever happened.  I'm not going to force you to.  But for you to now suggest that I recant and "sell" a different story is on the order of the Pharisees telling the blind man healed by Christ that he was never blind to begin with.

Are miracles like this really so uncommon that they seem impossible to believe?  I haven't had this particular miracle happen to me.  But I did have a miracle a little more powerful than what Estradling describes above.

I've also had many other Miracles happen in my life that I have no problem believing things like this.  If Jesus can multiply loaves and fishes, is it so impossible for him to do something to a bank account that seem miraculous?

Carb, I believe you.  That's not the point.

The point about Faith Promoting Stories is not about what exactly happened in all its glorious minute by minute detail.  Not a single General Authority will share a story about breaking the law and got away with it because of their faith regardless of how true it is.  This is because it is not a good thing to make a positive story to a group of Mormons out of lawbreaking.  That story would have been so much better if you just skipped the part about lawbreaking.  It would still retain all of its faith promoting qualities without tainting it with lawbreaking, even after your disclaimer.

Edited by anatess2
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@anatess2

 what law was broken?  It's not about "getting away with" anything.  She never bounced any checks.

I'll point out again -- that's what she felt she was SUPPOSED to do.  The widow was told to feed Elijah first as a leap of faith.  And the barrel and cruse never failed after.  You could interpret that to say she was ordered to commit suicide.  But no one does.

Whatever.  I guess I just don't get what the hubub is about.  I'm done.

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23 minutes ago, Carborendum said:

@anatess2

 what law was broken?  It's not about "getting away with" anything.  She never bounced any checks.

I'll point out again -- that's what she felt she was SUPPOSED to do.  The widow was told to feed Elijah first as a leap of faith.  And the barrel and cruse never failed after.  You could interpret that to say she was ordered to commit suicide.  But no one does.

Whatever.  I guess I just don't get what the hubub is about.  I'm done.

Dude... writing checks when you don't have money in the bank is ILLEGAL.  Big banks will slap a fee instead of take you to court depending on how good a customer you are to them.  But, the people you are writing the checks to CAN have the cops put you in jail pending a court case.

Yes, she may have been told by the Spirit to do it anyway.  That does happen.  But those kinds of stories should not be shared as a Faith Promoting Story.  It should be kept in your own journal as a testament to your faith.  Unless instructed by God to make that story known as with the story of Abraham trying to kill Isaac making its way into Scripture.

Edited by anatess2
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29 minutes ago, Carborendum said:

@anatess2

 what law was broken?  It's not about "getting away with" anything.  She never bounced any checks.

I'll point out again -- that's what she felt she was SUPPOSED to do.  The widow was told to feed Elijah first as a leap of faith.  And the barrel and cruse never failed after.  You could interpret that to say she was ordered to commit suicide.  But no one does.

Whatever.  I guess I just don't get what the hubub is about.  I'm done.

Just because you didn't get caught does not mean that you didn't break the law. 

Let's not mix modern day folklore with scripture you minimize the importance of the scripture when you do that.

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On 6/17/2016 at 7:13 AM, Carborendum said:

She prayed for a miracle and simply wrote the checks to pay the bills because she felt like she had to.

Did she ever try praying for better math skills?  People get that one wrong the other way all the time, so I'm very reluctant to attribute to Divine intervention what sounds like simple innumeracy.

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22 minutes ago, Backroads said:

I believe I even shared it here, but we did have a year where our bank account math simply did not make sense. Sure, I'll happily consider it a miracle.

I agree with this... (but absolutely do not agree with writing checks when the money isn't the account, believing they will somehow be covered).  When our kids were tiny and I looked at our income and outgoing in a spreadsheet, the math didn't add up as outgoing was more than incoming.  But we existed, we lived, we paid our bills, we made it.  However that was of course due to me paying the 'important' bill, putting off one or two until the next paycheck, robbing Peter to pay Paul so to speak sometimes... but it all worked out in the end.  :)   Just not on paper.  LOL.

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I started my family 14 years ago and boy do I look back and see so many blessings gained and some missed. Hind site is 20/20 right!

I am a firm believer in prayer and my 3 daughters are 3 more extra people in this world that pray for me on a daily basis. I have felt the power of prayer protect me when on dangerous job sites or when the stresses of life seemed to want to take me down into dark places. I believe that prayers from our immediate family (my children and wife) are the most strongest but prayers from my parents and distant relatives also help. For those of us that dont have children or come from small families your ward is also your family and your leaders and church members are praying for you also, Isnt that a great feeling to know that there are 100's of other people in your community praying for you?

Immediate family, extended family, ward family, human family...all these prayers help.

What does this have to do with starting a family and finances? I have had the same job after 14 years, we downsized multiple times and I am one of two people left from what used to be a team of 15. I also started a small service business 8 years ago and it has constantly grown bigger every year. The prayers and blessings from Heaven are the reason my family has gone from struggling to being comfortable. I am NOTHING without my children and wife, I am NOTHING without Christ.

 

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Guest LiterateParakeet
On June 21, 2016 at 2:56 PM, omegaseamaster75 said:

Mr Marklin didn't say to put off a family until you are done with school. 

I think that most should. At a minimum hold off having kids until you have a "real" job.

Perhaps I misunderstood him....he did say "lack of education" which could mean not being finished with school or never having gone.  

I found this today and thought of this thread. 

Quote

 

 Young mothers and fathers, with all my heart I counsel you not to postpone having your children, being cocreatorrs with our Father in Heaven. Do not use the reasoning of the world, such as, “We’ll wait until we can better afford having children, until we are more secure, until John has completed his education, until he has a better-paying job, until we have a larger home, until we’ve obtained a few of the material conveniences,” and on and on. This is the reasoning of the world, and is not pleasing in the sight of God. Mothers who enjoy good health, have your children and have them early. And, husbands, always be considerate of your wives in the bearing of children. Do not curtail the number of your children for personal or selfish reasons. Material possessions, social convenience, and so-called professional advantages are nothing compared to a righteous posterity. In the eternal perspective, children—not possessions, not position, not prestige—are our greatest jewels.  Ezra Taft Benson, To The Mothers of the Church

 

 

Quote

 

 Also, the need for education or material things does not justify the postponing of children in order to keep the wife working as the breadwinner of the family. I remember the counsel of our beloved prophet Spencer W. Kimball to married students. He said: “I have told tens of thousands of young folks that when they marry they should not wait for children until they have finished their schooling and financial desires. … They should live together normally and let the children come. … “I know of no scriptures,” President Kimball continued,

“where an authorization is given to young wives to withhold their families and go to work to put their husbands through school. There are thousands of husbands who have worked their own way through school and have reared families at the same time” (“Marriage Is Honorable,” in Speeches of the Year, 1973, Provo: Brigham Young University Press, 1974, p. 263). - Ezra Taft Benson, To the Fathers of the Church

 

 

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My wife and I waited to start trying to have children for a couple of years after marriage, for the purpose of getting to know each other intimately and enjoying time alone together. I don't think we did wrong, but in retrospect, I would probably urge that we not wait so long if I were to go back and do it again.

I admire people who act in faith, eyes wide open, walking forward without knowing beforehand what their steps will be but having confidence that, with their own best efforts, God will provide. I have much less patience with those who are simply irresponsible and take no thought for the consequences of their own actions, assuming with an entitlement mentality that all will be taken care of for them and that, when and if the time of reckoning comes, someone else will pay their dues for them.

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2 hours ago, Vort said:

My wife and I waited to start trying to have children for a couple of years after marriage, for the purpose of getting to know each other intimately and enjoying time alone together. I don't think we did wrong, but in retrospect, I would probably urge that we not wait so long if I were to go back and do it again.

I admire people who act in faith, eyes wide open, walking forward without knowing beforehand what their steps will be but having confidence that, with their own best efforts, God will provide. I have much less patience with those who are simply irresponsible and take no thought for the consequences of their own actions, assuming with an entitlement mentality that all will be taken care of for them and that, when and if the time of reckoning comes, someone else will pay their dues for them.

My husband and I were ready for kids when we got married.  We agreed that we will settle our religious differences before the baby is born.  5 years later, we still couldn't get pregnant.  I was starting to worry that something is wrong with me.  Then I got baptized.  3 months later I was pregnant.  A year after baptism my husband and I got sealed.  3 weeks after that the baby was born under covenant.  I don't believe this is a coincidence.  At all.

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