How to Get your Kids to Come Home for Thanksgiving

[Larry Cotrell]

A stake president in Salt Lake calls his son in New York the day before Thanksgiving and says,"I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough."

"Dad, what are you talking about?" the son screams. "We can't stand the sight of each other any longer," the stake president says. "We're sick of each other, and I'm sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Chicago and tell her."

Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. "Like heck they're getting divorced," she shouts, "I'll take care of this."

She calls Salt Lake immediately, and screams at her father, "You are NOT getting divorced. Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling my brother back, and we'll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don't do a thing, DO YOU HEAR ME?" and hangs up.

The stake president hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. "Okay," he says, "they're coming for Thanksgiving and paying their own way."

I think I should try this with my kids.

 

[pam]

That joke is so old.  I've never heard it told as a stake president though.

[Larry Cotrell]

Once you've read two or three joke books you've read them all. After that they are all different forms of the same few jokes.

Edited September 3, 2016 by Larry Cotrell

[Sunday21]

A Mormon couple are in an airplane  flying over the Atlantic. The plane lost both engines and the pilot announced that the plane would need to crash land on a small island. The plane crash landed with few injuries to passengers. Once the passengers disembarked the pilot explained that the radio was dead and that as the plane had flown off course, it was unlikely that they would be found. The passengers were lost with little hope of rescue. The morman man turned to his wife and asked 'Honey, did you make our contribution to Young Women's Camp?' She replied 'No I forgot. How can you think about that when we are lost in the Atlantic! The husband chucked and replied, 'Don't worry. I know the Young Women's president. She wants that check. She'll find us!'

Edited September 4, 2016 by Sunday21