Investigating LDS. Seeking faith/religion.

[Jackie]

I'm female in my mid-20's.

I've been seeking a religion that feels right to me. It would have to truly speak to my soul in a way that won't let me tear myself away from it.

I've "tried out" other religions in the past namely: Catholicism, Bible believing Christianity, Seventh Day Adventists, Judaism, Hare Krishna, Buddhism, Islam, Hinduism, etc.

I have received a Book of Mormon 1 year ago from a friend that wasn't part of the LDS, but knew I was seeking religion. I didn't quite read it until now.

I just begun reading it yesterday and wow, it is very readable. It pulls me in.

I went to a LDS church service not to long ago and it felt very nice, although the members put a lot of emphasis on family and children. I don't want any children in my lifetime. My boyfriend of 4 years understands this and respects my decision.

I'm going to be reading The Book of Mormon until I finish it. I really enjoy it so far. (I'm still in 1 Nephi)

[NeedleinA]

57 minutes ago, Jackie said:

I'm female in my mid-20's.

I've been seeking a religion that feels right to me. It would have to truly speak to my soul in a way that won't let me tear myself away from it.

I've "tried out" other religions in the past namely: Catholicism, Bible believing Christianity, Seventh Day Adventists, Judaism, Hare Krishna, Buddhism, Islam, Hinduism, etc.

I have received a Book of Mormon 1 year ago from a friend that wasn't part of the LDS, but knew I was seeking religion. I didn't quite read it until now.

I just begun reading it yesterday and wow, it is very readable. It pulls me in.

I went to a LDS church service not to long ago and it felt very nice, although the members put a lot of emphasis on family and children. I don't want any children in my lifetime. My boyfriend of 4 years understands this and respects my decision.

I'm going to be reading The Book of Mormon until I finish it. I really enjoy it so far. (I'm still in 1 Nephi)

Good luck in your quest. If you have any questions, we will do our best to try to help you out. 

[Sunday21]

Great to have you here!

[zil]

In my experience, mothers with children in their homes socialize with other mothers with children in their homes.  Given the limitations on their time, this appears to be an exclusive arrangement.  I have never observed anything like "shunning" but at the same time, don't be surprised if you have a hard (or even impossible) time making friends with LDS women your age when they all have children in their homes and want to spend their limited spare time with others in the same situation...

[Jane_Doe]

16 minutes ago, zil said:

In my experience, mothers with children in their homes socialize with other mothers with children in their homes.  Given the limitations on their time, this appears to be an exclusive arrangement.  I have never observed anything like "shunning" but at the same time, don't be surprised if you have a hard (or even impossible) time making friends with LDS women your age when they all have children in their homes and want to spend their limited spare time with others in the same situation...

It's not impossible: I do it all the time.

[Jane_Doe]

4 hours ago, Jackie said:

I'm female in my mid-20's.

I've been seeking a religion that feels right to me. It would have to truly speak to my soul in a way that won't let me tear myself away from it.

I've "tried out" other religions in the past namely: Catholicism, Bible believing Christianity, Seventh Day Adventists, Judaism, Hare Krishna, Buddhism, Islam, Hinduism, etc.

I have received a Book of Mormon 1 year ago from a friend that wasn't part of the LDS, but knew I was seeking religion. I didn't quite read it until now.

I just begun reading it yesterday and wow, it is very readable. It pulls me in.

I went to a LDS church service not to long ago and it felt very nice, although the members put a lot of emphasis on family and children. I don't want any children in my lifetime. My boyfriend of 4 years understands this and respects my decision.

I'm going to be reading The Book of Mormon until I finish it. I really enjoy it so far. (I'm still in 1 Nephi)

Welcome welcome!!

[Guest]

15 minutes ago, zil said:

In my experience, mothers with children in their homes socialize with other mothers with children in their homes.  Given the limitations on their time, this appears to be an exclusive arrangement.  I have never observed anything like "shunning" but at the same time, don't be surprised if you have a hard (or even impossible) time making friends with LDS women your age when they all have children in their homes and want to spend their limited spare time with others in the same situation...

I'd say that's true with the young mother set. As I get older and have more freedom (babysitters at home! Yay!) I find that I'm socializing more with the women I serve in callings with. 

Childless women aren't entirely non-existent in the church. In fact, our YW president married later to an older guy and doesn't have any children. I know a handful of women who were never able to have children, and then there are those who haven't ever married. I think also as infertility becomes more and more common (another topic for another day), being childless isn't as much a stigma or "weird" thing in the church. 

[zil]

It may be regional (e.g. Utah), and I would normally say this is all me (cuz I'm weird and I know it), but there are others here (not in my ward, but with whom I work) with the same experiences - all efforts to befriend mothers fail (not that anyone is unkind or anything like that, it's more a matter of interest / focus / availability).  Maybe I only know weird people, but that seems improbable.

[zil]

5 minutes ago, Eowyn said:

being childless isn't as much a stigma or "weird" thing in the church. 

For the record, lack of children isn't what makes me weird - I'm just weird.

[Guest]

5 minutes ago, zil said:

Maybe I only know weird people

I have an unpopular opinion on this... but it is my opinion, and friends and family who have moved from here to Utah agree: Utah Mormons can be kind of weird. Especially the young marrieds. I'm not saying all of them, because I'm obviously fond of many, but the church culture there is definitely a different flavor. 

[Guest]

5 minutes ago, zil said:

For the record, lack of children isn't what makes me weird - I'm just weird.

But delightfully so.

[lynnpca7]

4 minutes ago, Jane_Doe said:

Welcome welcome!!

15 minutes ago, Jane_Doe said:

Welcome welcome!!

I finally took the time to try to respond to someone on this.  It's not as clear cut as FB.  Hope I'm posting in the right spot.  Welcome Jackie.  I am a grandmother, but I have many single friends and friends who are childless young couples.  I can speak from experience that if someone without children wants to attend a play group to socialize with the moms, it won't be an issue.  

Most wards periodically have social events for the women where you might have a better chance to get to know individuals. If all else fails, invite someone over for dinner or a game night.  People are busy and waiting for an invite may or not pan out.

I joined The Church when I was only 19.  I was newly divorced.  I ran into a friend from high school who used to belong to the same Lutheran Church that I did.  My motivation to listen to the missionary lessons was to read, study and pray so I could look her in the eye and tell her she was being deceived. I wasn't surprised to get answers to my prayers, just that the Spirit spoke to my heart that The Church was true. I was baptized 3 weeks later and haven't regretted it in the 43 years since then.  

 

The bottom line is that The Church is true, but the members are human.  Don't get me wrong.  They are great for the most part.  It's just that your testimony needs to be of the doctrines not the people.  We all know we are imperfect. The Church is a hospital for sinners, not a museum of saints.  Best wishes to you.

[zil]

4 minutes ago, Eowyn said:

I have an unpopular opinion on this... but it is my opinion, and friends and family who have moved from here to Utah agree: Utah Mormons can be kind of weird. Especially the young marrieds. I'm not saying all of them, because I'm obviously fond of many, but the church culture there is definitely a different flavor. 

Yes, I do wonder if it's regional - I grew up in upstate NY, and I have a hard time imagining the same phenomenon there.  My dad and brother (in low-density Zion) seemed a little surprised when I described my findings.  Personally, I hope the phenomenon doesn't extend far, but I also understand it - birds of a feather, limited time/resources, support network, etc. - it makes sense.

[Guest MormonGator]

11 minutes ago, zil said:

Yes, I do wonder if it's regional - I grew up in upstate NY, and I have a hard time imagining the same phenomenon there.  My dad and brother (in low-density Zion) seemed a little surprised when I described my findings.  Personally, I hope the phenomenon doesn't extend far, but I also understand it - birds of a feather, limited time/resources, support network, etc. - it makes sense.

Speaking as an outsider both you and @Eowyn are absolutely right. 

[pam]

57 minutes ago, zil said:

For the record, lack of children isn't what makes me weird - I'm just weird.

That's why you and I get along so well.  You put up with me being even weirder.   But you are an awesome kind of weird.  

[zil]

4 minutes ago, pam said:

That's why you and I get along so well.  You put up with me being even weirder.   But you are an awesome kind of weird.  

Few can appreciate a good weirdness more than a fellow weirdo...

[pam]

3 minutes ago, zil said:

Few can appreciate a good weirdness more than a fellow weirdo...

Hahaha that is soooo true.

[Anddenex]

5 hours ago, Jackie said:

I've been seeking a religion that feels right to me. It would have to truly speak to my soul in a way that won't let me tear myself away from it.

I went to a LDS church service not to long ago and it felt very nice, although the members put a lot of emphasis on family and children. I don't want any children in my lifetime. My boyfriend of 4 years understands this and respects my decision.

I'm going to be reading The Book of Mormon until I finish it. I really enjoy it so far. (I'm still in 1 Nephi)

Here are some thoughts from a random stranger on the internet who is the offspring of two converts who converted in their twenties also;

1) Seek truth, truth will speak to our soul. Truth is truth, and when discovered it is worth every sacrifice to make sure we obtain it. The parables of Christ with regard to "treasure."

2) A religion that will "speak to my soul." This religion will speak to your soul. Truth is revealed from the Father to his children through the power of his Spirit. This is soul speaking to soul. As to the thought it, "won't let me tear myself away from it," I would encourage you to pay attention to the following chapters and verses as you read the Book of Mormon: 1 Nephi 8, Jacob 4:6 & 13, and Alma 32. God will speak to our soul; however, we ultimately choose what we remove ourself from (even if true) and what we will not allow to tear us away from (refer back to #1)

3) Family. Family is the central unit in God's plan. The strength of a society is found within a strong central unity, family. Don't be surprised that your thoughts and feelings may change (in more than one way) as you learn more about God's plan and our eternal potential, or as is often shared the three pillars of truth: creation, fall, and atonement. 

We wish you the best, and try not to pay attention to these two weirdos @zil and @pam, and should they try anything funny remember the famous words, "Run Forest, Run!"  (Anddenex exits stage left really really quick)

[pam]

5 minutes ago, Anddenex said:

We wish you the best, and try not to pay attention to these two weirdos @zil and @pam, and should they try anything funny remember the famous words, "Run Forest, Run!"  (Anddenex exits stage left really really quick)

@Anddenex  Have you not read the site rules regarding making fun of zil and me?      

[Anddenex]

3 minutes ago, pam said:

@Anddenex  Have you not read the site rules regarding making fun of zil and me?      

I may have missed that line.... 

[pam]

6 hours ago, Jackie said:

 

I'm going to be reading The Book of Mormon until I finish it. I really enjoy it so far. (I'm still in 1 Nephi)

Just a bit of a warning.  You will find 2 Nephi very difficult to get through as it pretty much just quotes Isaiah in the Bible.  But once you get past it, the rest really is fascinating.   Happy reading.  If you have any questions during your reading, don't hesitate to ask.

[Sunday21]

1 hour ago, zil said:

For the record, lack of children isn't what makes me weird - I'm just weird.

But we love you?

[Sunday21]

I am childless. I find it easy to make friends with young mums because I am flexible with my time and I have the energy to listen. Young moms have a tendency to fall asleep if they sit still for a moment!?

[Sunday21]

24 minutes ago, pam said:

Just a bit of a warning.  You will find 2 Nephi very difficult to get through as it pretty much just quotes Isaiah in the Bible.  But once you get past it, the rest really is fascinating.   Happy reading.  If you have any questions during your reading, don't hesitate to ask.

2nd Nephi almost killed me the first 5 times even with a manual. Suggest just skimming through it the first time. Get onto the stuff that's understandable. Yes, you will understand it ( recommend Ridges the Book of Mormon made easier) but the first few times is difficult so just read it quickly and push through.

[kapikui]

5 hours ago, Sunday21 said:

2nd Nephi almost killed me the first 5 times even with a manual. Suggest just skimming through it the first time. Get onto the stuff that's understandable. Yes, you will understand it ( recommend Ridges the Book of Mormon made easier) but the first few times is difficult so just read it quickly and push through.

Honestly,on your first couple of runs through (unless you really happen to like Isaiah), I would suggest skipping any chapter that has "Compare Isaiah xx" in the chapter heading.  There's a whole lot of good stuff in there, but it's dense, and can be difficult to understand, and Nephi's going on about how simple it is just makes me want to go back in time and hurt him. 

After you've read the Book of Mormon enough that you know how everything's going to go ahead of time, the included chapters of Isaiah become much easier to understand, at least in the desired context. 

Likewise skimming 3 Nephi after chapter 12 or so is probably ok on your first run.  It's a lot simpler, but it's also nearly direct quotes from Christ's sermons in the old world as (Spoilers) it's Christ visiting the Nephites and teaching them what he taught in Israel. Again a lot of good stuff, but likely stuff you already know, and less helpful for the overview that you're going to want for the first time.