Feeling the spirit more


Recommended Posts

How do you work on being able to feel the spirit more? At the minute I feel really without direction, I have prayed about it lots but I don't feel as though I actually get an answer,  like I'm being guided by the Holy Ghost.    Im a really unemotional person,  I would never have joined the Church just on a feeling,  I read everything I could get my hands on good and bad before joining.    I envy people at Church who seem so contented and get very emotional about their testimony as I can see that they truly have such deep faith yet I've never really had feelings like that except a couple of times, one doing baptisms at the Temple and I didn't really know what was happening at the time just that I felt really overwhelmed and upset.   Any advice. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

A big thing that's been going through my head lately is accepting who you are as you are.  You don't need to feel the Spirit in an emotional-I'm-going-to-sob manner.  Some people just aren't like that, and the Spirit speaks to us to each in our own native tongue- and if your language doesn't involve waterworks, that's ok.  There is an art of learning how you speak to yourself and how the Spirt speaks your individual language.  Is it logic?  Is it the physical heart burning sensation?  Is it peace?  Is it passion and drive?  Is it simple clarity and "it makes sense"?  What convicts you?  This language can be different at different times too, just as we feel receive love different ways at different times.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, An Investigator said:

1. I envy people at Church who seem so contented and get very emotional about their testimony

2.  I've never really had feelings like that except a couple of times

Reverse order for you AI:

2. I would suggest that this is the norm for most members of the church AI, you are not the exception. For me it is more like periodic experiences with the Spirit sprinkled throughout my life rather than a "constant companion" holding my hand every step of the way. I tend to think of things in terms of training wheels for a bike. The Spirit can help stabilize/give direction in our lives, but for most part we are riding the bike by ourselves. I imagine a parent along side a child learning to ride a bike. They are there with them, but they are trying not to do all the work for them, otherwise they won't learn for themselves. Heavenly Father hears every single one of your prayers - rest assured of that. Your prayers will be answered, simply perhaps not in the time or way your might expect. ;)

1. It is okay to see others express their testimonies, but don't let it bother you about yours at all. They might be in a totally different place than you. Perhaps the moment you were feeling the Spirit at the temple, a different Sister looked at you and said, "I wish I could feel the Spirit like Sister AI, why am I not more like her?". You simply just never know. Don't let envy kick in over this subject. Last thought. We are given gifts from our Father in Heaven. Some people are simply more receptive to promptings than others. It doesn't make the rest of us less worthy or loved, it just means our Father in Heaven communicates with us perhaps a little differently then others.

Keep doing what you are doing. Remember it is okay to ride your bike by yourself sometimes... it is for our own good. If ever I need a spiritual boost, go serve someone. I've learned that as I help others lift their burdens, my burdens become lighter too.

Photo: Just there watching, letting us figure somethings out for ourselves:

rei-bike-lessons.jpg

Edited by NeedleinA
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Thanks for that. I'm finding it difficult at the moment,  I think most converts maybe come into the Church in their teens so it's OK for them to take time to find their feet,  as I'm older I sometimes feel like people are pushing me, do I not know that, now you have done y why not do x without giving me room to breathe and think about things.    

I am having trouble accepting myself as to be honest I'm not sure who I am anymore,  I was alot more sure before I joined the Church in the arbitrary sense.  Listening to people tear up and get over joyed about accepting Christ is making me worry that my seed has been planted on rocky ground.   

 

Edited to say... I'm not having doubts about the Church,  I love the Gospel and I know I'm in the right place,  I just feel very out of my depth sometimes, I have thought maybe a uplifting quote journal or something like that might help? 

Edited by An Investigator
Link to comment
Share on other sites

13 minutes ago, An Investigator said:

Thanks for that. I'm finding it difficult at the moment,  I think most converts maybe come into the Church in their teens so it's OK for them to take time to find their feet,  as I'm older I sometimes feel like people are pushing me, do I not know that, now you have done y why not do x without giving me room to breathe and think about things.    

I am having trouble accepting myself as to be honest I'm not sure who I am anymore,  I was alot more sure before I joined the Church in the arbitrary sense.  Listening to people tear up and get over joyed about accepting Christ is making me worry that my seed has been planted on rocky ground.   

 

Edited to say... I'm not having doubts about the Church,  I love the Gospel and I know I'm in the right place,  I just feel very out of my depth sometimes, I have thought maybe a uplifting quote journal or something like that might help? 

Can people in the church be inpatient and imperfect?  Heck yeah!  If you need space/time, say so.  Don't let humans push you when God says take your time.  Speak in the way that fits you.  Personally, I frequently go for mediation/prayer over jigsaw puzzle, in addition to writing.

And @An Investigator I have felt your testimony and spirit vibrantly on this forum. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

20 minutes ago, Jane_Doe said:

 

And @An Investigator I have felt your testimony and spirit vibrantly on this forum. 

Thank you!  Joining the Church has been one of the best decisions I ever made.. This year has been one of the best years of my life and also one of the most difficult and contemplatory (not sure thats a word, if it isn't it should be) 

Edited by An Investigator
Link to comment
Share on other sites

33 minutes ago, An Investigator said:

Thank you!  Joining the Church has been one of the best decisions I ever made.. This year has been one of the best years of my life and also one of the most difficult and contemplatory (not sure thats a word, if it isn't it should be) 

Fantastic!  And "contemplatory" is a great word!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 10/7/2016 at 11:41 AM, An Investigator said:

Listening to people tear up and get over joyed about accepting Christ is making me worry that my seed has been planted on rocky ground.   

The only time we know a seed has been planted on any ground, other than good soil, is if we leave the Church (your seed isn't planted on "rocky ground" if you are concerned about how "emotional" one might appear as they share their testimony and you don't). 

As pertaining to listening to the spirit I believe our confirmation is the best source of principle to listen more. In our confirmation, we are counseled (commanded) to "Receive the Holy Ghost." As we receive the Holy Ghost more in our life, the more we will be able to recognize, rather than feeling like we are guessing, the Spirit more in our life. This reminds me of Abraham 1:2 and why Abraham finally received a personal covenant by which we are all blessed by. 

This quote from Joseph Smith is one of my favorites, “A person may profit by noticing the first intimation of the Spirit of revelation; for instance, when you feel pure intelligence flowing into you, it may give you sudden strokes of ideas … and thus by learning the Spirit of God and understanding it, you may grow into the principle of revelation until you become perfect in Christ Jesus.” I am fond of this quote because the statement doesn't mentioning anything pertaining to "emotion." The statement refers to "pure intelligence" giving us strokes of ideas until one day it becomes second nature. 

Our testimony carries more weight if our actions are more in-line (we are more consistent) with what we bear testimony of, not the emotion behind it. The statement, "I know God lives," without tears and emotions is just as powerful as "I know God lives" with tears and deep emotion. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 10/7/2016 at 0:41 PM, An Investigator said:

 I have thought maybe a uplifting quote journal or something like that might help? 

I posted a few stories on another thread that you may be helpful to you:

http://mormonhub.com/forums/topic/58447-is-revelation-from-the-lord-or-satan-or-me/#comment-847593

Here's an excerpt from yet another thread.  This was what my patriarch told me just before he gave me my patriarchal blessing.  I had expressed to him that I didn't know if I'd ever really felt the Spirit at all.

Quote

My patriarch told me that he'd never had a single or even a few very strong experiences that he could point to and say,"That's why..."  He had a gradual day-after-day, year-after-year building of assurance as he built his relationship with the Lord.  At some point he could look back on his life and his testimony and realize he had no doubt about where he was and where he stood with the Lord or about the truthfulness of the Gospel.

For the full post see here.

The following Askgramps article covers having a personal relationship with the Lord.  This is all part of that process.

http://askgramps.org/how-are-we-to-make-contact-with-jesus-and-have-a-personal-relationship/

Edited by Guest
Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 07/10/2016 at 10:29 AM, An Investigator said:

How do you work on being able to feel the spirit more? At the minute I feel really without direction, I have prayed about it lots but I don't feel as though I actually get an answer,  like I'm being guided by the Holy Ghost.    Im a really unemotional person,  I would never have joined the Church just on a feeling,  I read everything I could get my hands on good and bad before joining.    I envy people at Church who seem so contented and get very emotional about their testimony as I can see that they truly have such deep faith yet I've never really had feelings like that except a couple of times, one doing baptisms at the Temple and I didn't really know what was happening at the time just that I felt really overwhelmed and upset.   Any advice. 

President Harold B. Lee said that one way to get closer to the Spirit is seeking out correct knowledge which will bring the Spirit closer to you, which in turn will create a greater desire to gain more knowledge,  which in turn will bring the Spirit closer which....  It is a continuous, self perpetuating cycle that feeds itself. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On ‎10‎/‎7‎/‎2016 at 0:05 PM, An Investigator said:

Thank you!  Joining the Church has been one of the best decisions I ever made.. This year has been one of the best years of my life and also one of the most difficult and contemplatory (not sure thats a word, if it isn't it should be) 

My first impression going through your posts on this thread is that you are missing something.  I have no idea what it may be but I have a lot of experience with the feeling that I have missed or am missing something very important.  Not so much that what I understand is wrong - just incomplete.  Every time I think I have finely gotten some progress I realize that I have much farther to go than I ever realized before.  In essence, every time I learn something or get an answer to something - it seems there are a thousand new questions or a vast horizon of things yet to accomplish or discover.   And I have spent my entire life studying, practicing and learning - and yes I am older, likely somewhat older than you.

The one consolation that I have consistently realized is that I am constantly making progress and that it often appears that I have made a lot more progress than those that do not seem to realize that there really is a lot to yet be revealed – even about the simplest principles of the Gospel.  Sometimes it is for me like climbing a mountain – it does not seem like progress is being made or that we are any closer to the top – until we look back on where we have been and how far we have come.

 

The Traveler

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On ‎10‎/‎7‎/‎2016 at 1:41 PM, An Investigator said:

Thanks for that. I'm finding it difficult at the moment,  I think most converts maybe come into the Church in their teens so it's OK for them to take time to find their feet,  as I'm older I sometimes feel like people are pushing me, do I not know that, now you have done y why not do x without giving me room to breathe and think about things.    

I am having trouble accepting myself as to be honest I'm not sure who I am anymore,  I was alot more sure before I joined the Church in the arbitrary sense.  Listening to people tear up and get over joyed about accepting Christ is making me worry that my seed has been planted on rocky ground.   

 

Edited to say... I'm not having doubts about the Church,  I love the Gospel and I know I'm in the right place,  I just feel very out of my depth sometimes, I have thought maybe a uplifting quote journal or something like that might help? 

What has helped me a lot in my life is recognizing that the spark or light that is inside each of us, no matter how small, is divine. God is not far away, on some distant planet. He is here amongst us, with you. Don't sell yourself short. Although God is there with us and it might seem like He is just standing by watching, I believe that His arm is outstretched continuously and He wants to have a conversational, personal, and loving relationship with you. God is love. Think about that.

The Spirit will be felt in the heart and in the mind. You are a spirit of God. Whatever portion of light, life, and truth that is inside of you also exist in God. In that sense you are in God and God is in you. I have found that meditation is essential in my life to feeling close to God and peering through the veil and seeing not just God's hand, but His total involvement in your life. Don't forget that Heavenly Mother is also real and She too has an influence in your life and is very interested in you. We truly have loving Parents.

What I'm about to say next, please don't misunderstand as me being rude or insensitive. Most of the time when we don't feel that closeness or sense the presence of God in our life, it is because of ignorance or unbelief. We either have some misunderstanding about God or we just don't believe what God says. Trust me, I'm not better and I am not saying that I am special. I'm just speaking from my own experience in life. We can get that assurance from God that He approves of us and our life. We just need to ask, quite often, in mighty prayer. I would encourage you to read the Book of Mormon, especially the examples provided where prophets such as Enos, Nephi, Alma, and others received a remission of their sins and they received an assurance from God that they were forgiven.

From my experience, God is totally loving, very kind, good natured, patient, and not malicious at all. He wants to uplift us and to help us feel happy and good about ourselves. He truly understands human weakness. He won't hold that against you. He totally gets the human condition and is ready to forgive and forget. Not saying you are sinful or anything, but just saying that God thinks that you are wonderful and great no matter what!

-Finrock

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 2016-10-07 at 1:33 PM, NeedleinA said:

Reverse order for you AI:

2. I would suggest that this is the norm for most members of the church AI, you are not the exception. For me it is more like periodic experiences with the Spirit sprinkled throughout my life rather than a "constant companion" holding my hand every step of the way. I tend to think of things in terms of training wheels for a bike. The Spirit can help stabilize/give direction in our lives, but for most part we are riding the bike by ourselves. I imagine a parent along side a child learning to ride a bike. They are there with them, but they are trying not to do all the work for them, otherwise they won't learn for themselves. Heavenly Father hears every single one of your prayers - rest assured of that. Your prayers will be answered, simply perhaps not in the time or way your might expect. ;)

1. It is okay to see others express their testimonies, but don't let it bother you about yours at all. They might be in a totally different place than you. Perhaps the moment you were feeling the Spirit at the temple, a different Sister looked at you and said, "I wish I could feel the Spirit like Sister AI, why am I not more like her?". You simply just never know. Don't let envy kick in over this subject. Last thought. We are given gifts from our Father in Heaven. Some people are simply more receptive to promptings than others. It doesn't make the rest of us less worthy or loved, it just means our Father in Heaven communicates with us perhaps a little differently then others.

Keep doing what you are doing. Remember it is okay to ride your bike by yourself sometimes... it is for our own good. If ever I need a spiritual boost, go serve someone. I've learned that as I help others lift their burdens, my burdens become lighter too.

Photo: Just there watching, letting us figure somethings out for ourselves:

rei-bike-lessons.jpg

That was a beautiful explanation. Thank you for this.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 2016-10-07 at 1:41 PM, An Investigator said:

Thanks for that. I'm finding it difficult at the moment,  I think most converts maybe come into the Church in their teens so it's OK for them to take time to find their feet,  as I'm older I sometimes feel like people are pushing me, do I not know that, now you have done y why not do x without giving me room to breathe and think about things.    

I am having trouble accepting myself as to be honest I'm not sure who I am anymore,  I was alot more sure before I joined the Church in the arbitrary sense.  Listening to people tear up and get over joyed about accepting Christ is making me worry that my seed has been planted on rocky ground.   

 

Edited to say... I'm not having doubts about the Church,  I love the Gospel and I know I'm in the right place,  I just feel very out of my depth sometimes, I have thought maybe a uplifting quote journal or something like that might help? 

I know just how you feel. I suspect many adult converts go through the same process. Hang in there.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

OK thanks for the replies..  I haven't replied sooner as I've been thinking and praying about this.   I had a really abusive childhood and I have come to the conclusion that joining the Church has brought these feelings to the surface and is why I'm having difficulties in the Church so I'm going to go for some therapy to put it to bed and start moving forward.    Thanks you for all your encouragement.  

Edited by An Investigator
Link to comment
Share on other sites

46 minutes ago, An Investigator said:

OK thanks for the replies..  I haven't replied sooner as I've been thinking and praying about this.   I had a really abusive childhood and I have come to the conclusion that joining the Church has brought these feelings to the surface and is why I'm having difficulties in the Church so I'm going to go for some therapy to put it to bed and start moving forward.    Thanks you for all your encouragement.  

I was also severely abused as a child and for a very good portion of my life I felt that God was just so far away and that I was unworthy, worthless, and not privy or deserving of God's love. My prayers were often just frustrated attempts to do what I was supposed to do. The abuse I suffered really put me in to a dark place. Ultimately I was healed through the atonement of Jesus Christ, but what helped me to begin the process of healing was going to therapy and finally exposing and speaking about the things that happened to me. It was a great struggle to get to a point where I was able to forgive my abusers. I received a lot of help from my leaders and from therapy. So, I think that is a good idea. I will say this, though, is that for me just therapy was not enough. Therapy helped me to start talking about my abuse, writing about it, receiving some tools to help cope, and getting thoughts and ideas that helped me to resolve feelings. As I mentioned, though, what ultimately brought healing and provided me power to forgive and move on, was my faith in Jesus Christ and having a broken heart and a contrite spirit, and then calling out to God for healing and relief. This post is not adequate to really describe or give a proper understanding of this process, but there finally was an event that resulted in me receiving a remission of my sins and to be baptized by fire and receive the Holy Ghost.

The conditions for being baptized by fire and receiving the Holy Ghost is a broken heart and a contrite spirit. We can expect, then, in our life, to have situations that will break our hearts. It is up to us to then decide to have a contrite spirit and reach out to Jesus Christ to heal us. He does deliver and will deliver. He is mighty to save and has power over all things.

I pray for you and I truly do desire that you will find healing from what has happened to you in the past. Resolving trauma is a big thing and living with an abusive past that is unresolved can totally be a barrier to us feeling God's love. Because I know God is not a respecter of persons, I can confidently say that I know God is with you and has been by your side constantly and if you haven't seen it yet, one day you will see how much He has indeed been blessing, guiding, and loving you. Once you can get to a point of healing, it becomes much easier to see and feel God in your life on a daily basis.

God continues to sustain me day to day and without Him I would still be lost, would probably get lost again, and would be nothing.

Sincerely,

-Finrock

Edited by Finrock
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I haven't talked to anyone at Church about it.. I'm going to secular therapy.  Ive only spoke to the Bishop twice in year I've been attending Church to get a limited use recommend and to accept a calling.   I think it will really help though.   Thanks for sharing 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, An Investigator said:

I haven't talked to anyone at Church about it.. I'm going to secular therapy.  Ive only spoke to the Bishop twice in year I've been attending Church to get a limited use recommend and to accept a calling.   I think it will really help though.   Thanks for sharing 

Abuse is a lot more common than anyone would like to admit. 1 in 6 is the statistic.  And, statistically speaking, Mormons are no different than the rest of the world.  Unfortunate that we aren't better than that.  But thankfully, we are no worse either.

Talking about it with a therapist may be helpful.  Talking about it with others is a sketchy issue.  On the one hand, it should NOT be something that is held in shame, because none of it was your fault.  But on the other hand, does it help anyone to talk about it freely and openly?  Maybe, maybe not.  It really depends on the people involved and the circumstances.

But regardless, the goal is to recognize what we've gone through as a part of life.  Little in life seems fair.  But the Lord knows all of our trials.  The thing about trials is that while we all have our various trials severally, the Lord doesn't actually remove the trials (not all the time anyway).  What He does do is give us the strength to work through them.

How tragic that anyone, especially a child, goes through such affliction.  But how much more inspiring the success stories that come from such trials.

All the best to you.

Edited by Guest
Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, An Investigator said:

OK thanks for the replies..  I haven't replied sooner as I've been thinking and praying about this.   I had a really abusive childhood and I have come to the conclusion that joining the Church has brought these feelings to the surface and is why I'm having difficulties in the Church so I'm going to go for some therapy to put it to bed and start moving forward.    Thanks you for all your encouragement.  

*Hugs* from another human being.

*More Hugs* from another abuse survivor.

*More More Hugs* from a sister in Christ.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

21 minutes ago, Carborendum said:

Abuse is a lot more common than anyone would like to admit. 1 in 6 is the statistic.  

For men it's 1/6.  If you have 4 men in a room, chances are at least one of them has been abused.

For women it's 1/3.  If you have 2 ladies in a room, chances are at least one of them has been abused.

And that's only talking about abuse that happens before the age of 18....

Edited by Jane_Doe
Link to comment
Share on other sites

8 minutes ago, Jane_Doe said:

For men it's 1/6.  If you have 4 men in a room, chances are at least one of them has been abused.

For women it's 1/3.  If you have 2 ladies in a room, chances are at least one of them has been abused.

And that's only talking about abuse that happens before the age of 18....

Uhmm.  The numbers aren't matching up.  Where is your source?

The 1/6 number was from a combined adult Sunday School class on the topic where some experts on family therapy and abuse came to discuss the topic with us.  Of course, that was about 15 years ago.  Numbers have changed.  But your numbers still don't match up with each other.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

6 minutes ago, Carborendum said:

Uhmm.  The numbers aren't matching up.  Where is your source?

The 1/6 number was from a combined adult Sunday School class on the topic where some experts on family therapy and abuse came to discuss the topic with us.  Of course, that was about 15 years ago.  Numbers have changed.  But your numbers still don't match up with each other.

Honestly I don't remember right now, it's been a couple of years since I did the research.  It was some national health agency.  And sadly I'm short on time right now go re-look right now.  You are correct though: numbers have gone up in the last decade.  It is speculated that it's because people are less prone to lie about things when they do happen, particularly men whom face a huge stigma for admitting having been sexually abused.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

5 minutes ago, Jane_Doe said:

Honestly I don't remember right now, it's been a couple of years since I did the research.  It was some national health agency.  And sadly I'm short on time right now go re-look right now.  You are correct though: numbers have gone up in the last decade.  It is speculated that it's because people are less prone to lie about things when they do happen, particularly men whom face a huge stigma for admitting having been sexually abused.  

Well, maybe what you wrote wasn't what you meant.  You said 1/6, but then said 1 of 4 would be abused.  The same with 1/3 and 1 in 2.  What did you mean by that?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

7 minutes ago, Carborendum said:

Well, maybe what you wrote wasn't what you meant.  You said 1/6, but then said 1 of 4 would be abused.  The same with 1/3 and 1 in 2.  What did you mean by that?

Oh that!  That's math.  1/6 guys are abused: therefore if you have 4 guys in the room it's ~50/50 at least one of them was abused.  For girls is 1/3 are abused, and if you have 2 girls in room it's more than 50/50 at least one of them was abused.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

9 minutes ago, Carborendum said:

Abuse is a lot more common than anyone would like to admit. 1 in 6 is the statistic.  And, statistically speaking, Mormons are no different than the rest of the world.  Unfortunate that we aren't better than that.  But thankfully, we are no worse either.

Talking about it with a therapist may be helpful.  Talking about it with others is a sketchy issue.  On the one hand, it should NOT be something that is held in shame, because none of it was your fault.  But on the other hand, does it help anyone to talk about it freely and openly?  Maybe, maybe not.  It really depends on the people involved and the circumstances.

But regardless, the goal is to recognize what we've gone through as a part of life.  Little in life seems fair.  But the Lord knows all of our trials.  The thing about trials is that while we all have our various trials severally, the Lord doesn't actually remove the trials (not all the time anyway).  What He does do is give us the strength to work through them.

How tragic that anyone, especially a child, goes through such affliction.  But how much more inspiring the success stories that come from such trials.

All the best to you.

It most definitely helps to freely and openly talk about your abuse under the right circumstances. I would say for most victims of abuse in order for them to get healing they must break free from the silence, the shame, and the fear. Abuse thrives in secrecy and will continue to afflict and torment the victim if left in the dark. Exposing this stuff is a critical step in transitioning from a victim to a survivor. It can be uncomfortable for some to hear some of these things, but, life sometimes sucks and crappy things happen. Those who have been victims can benefit greatly from hearing from those who have healed and are now survivors and are no longer afflicted, pained, or harmed from the abuse. Now, don't get me wrong, I don't mean that we need to speak about all of the details freely and openly in every circumstance, but, in the appropriate place and time and to the appropriate people, getting all of that stuff out in detail is a critical step. It needs to be exposed to the full light of the day in order to truly start dealing with it and healing from it.

-Finrock

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
 Share