Is it ever ok not to serve a mission???

[Fether]

I'm not necessarily talking about those that are sent home early for health reasons, but those that don't feel they need to for whatever reason. I also want to premise this with the desire to NOT pass judgement toward those that decide not to go. We all sin in life and choosing to not serve a mission wont keep you out of Celestial Glory.

In August 2015, Neil L. Anderson gave a talk titled 'Faith isn't by chance, but by choice' where he gives the following story:

A month ago in Brazil, I met Aroldo Cavalcante. He was baptized at age 21, the first member of the Church in his family. His faith burned brightly, and he immediately began preparing to serve a mission. Sadly, Aroldo’s mother was diagnosed with cancer. Three months later, only days before she died, she spoke to Aroldo of her greatest concern: There were no relatives to help. Aroldo would need to take full responsibility for his two younger sisters and his younger brother. He solemnly made this promise to his dying mother.

By day he worked in a bank, and at night he attended the university. He continued to keep his baptismal covenants, but his hopes for a full-time mission were gone. His mission would be caring for his family.
Months later while preparing a sacrament meeting talk, Aroldo studied the words that Samuel reprovingly spoke to King Saul: “To obey,” he read, “is better than [to] sacrifice.” Aroldo received the seemingly impossible impression that he needed to obey the prophet’s call to serve a mission. Undaunted by the obstacles before him, he moved forward with enormous faith.

Aroldo saved every Brazilian cruzeiro he could. At age 23, he received his mission call. He told his brother how much to withdraw each month from his account for the family. Aroldo still did not have enough money to pay the full cost of his mission and the living expenses for his brother and sisters, but with faith he entered the MTC. A week later he received the first of many blessings. The bank that had employed Elder Cavalcante unexpectedly doubled the money he was to receive as he concluded his work. This miracle, along with others, provided the needed income for his mission and his family during his absence.

Twenty years later, Brother Cavalcante is now serving as the president of the Recife Brazil Boa Viagem Stake. Looking back, he said of those days, “As I tried to live righteously, I felt the Savior’s love and guidance. My faith grew, allowing me to overcome many challenges.” Aroldo’s faith did not come by chance, but by choice.

There are many Christian men and women with deep faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, and we honor and respect them.

 

 

While talking about this this with a friend of mine, he said that while on his mission he was training a missionary who said he had a spiritual impression that he neeed to go home. The mission president called them and said "that's funny you got that promoting elder, because the prophet said the spirit told him you were to come here as a missionary."

similarily I have known a certain missionary that chose to go home for the same reason and now is anti-Mormon.

my last example is an elder I knew that went home early because of severe depression that he had not before experienced, when he got home they found he had a dangerous heart disease that, if left untreated, could had lead to his death.

We hear all the time from general authorities of miracle stories where young men sacrarice  greatly to serve missions, but never of miracle stories where young men choose not to serve because of sports, music, marriage, etc. often claiming they will do one later as senior missionaries (which I also do not think is ok).

Again, I do not wish to pass judgement, but rather recognize the sin for people who may be deciding to serve or not. Many righteous members in this church did not serve (including many mission presidents).

I personally believe that regardless of what is going on, you should do everything you can to serve. 

lastly, the famous quote from Pres. Monsoon. “Every worthy, able young man should prepare to serve a mission. Missionary service is a priesthood duty—an obligation the Lord expects of us who have been given so very much. Young men, I admonish you to prepare for service as a missionary”

 

That is an arguement on what I believe. Does anyone see it differently

Edited February 5, 2017 by Fether

[Guest]

If you have a mental or physical illness. I was told by my Stake President that because of my mental illnesses I didn't even have to serve and they would count me as  honorably served. I did attempt a mission however and was called to Las Vegas West mission. But those with mental and physical illness can get an honorable release without having to serve. At least according to my awesome Stake President.

[Jane_Doe]

The most important thing is to listen to what the Spirit tells us.  The person in the posted story specifically felt the prompting from the Spirit to go.  I have known others in similar circumstances to be told to stay.  I myself was told by the Spirit to stay.  Some people simply aren't able to go at all so their choice is nonexistent.  

As to the Monson quote: preparing to go is definitely beneficial to that person, regardless of whether or not you do actually go.  

[CV75]

2 hours ago, Fether said:

lastly, the famous quote from Pres. Monsoon. “Every worthy, able young man should prepare to serve a mission. Missionary service is a priesthood duty—an obligation the Lord expects of us who have been given so very much. Young men, I admonish you to prepare for service as a missionary”

Just an observation: President Monson's wording is "should prepare," as in accepting this obligatory priesthood duty. Every accountable young man can do that. Then when things get in the way, his preparation can still be applied in other ways if it is decided by the proper priesthood authority that he cannot serve a full-time mission. Whether or not he qualifies to carry out this obligation is up to the priesthood authority calling him to serve in a particular mission, since we do not call nor release ourselves (that's an example of the president's power to bind and seal). But all young men are called to prepare, and to serve by preparing.

As far as missionaries getting independent spiritual promptings that differ from their presiding priesthood authority, I think correct understanding of doctrine will help both the president and the missionary counsel and reason together and obtain the Lord's will.

[Guest]

Is it ever OK to not serve a mission for any reason, or for no reason at all?

I believe that only you can answer that question for yourself.  The decision to go on a mission or not is between you and God, and absolutely no one else.

[Blackmarch]

5 hours ago, Fether said:

I'm not necessarily talking about those that are sent home early for health reasons, but those that don't feel they need to for whatever reason. I also want to premise this with the desire to NOT pass judgement toward those that decide not to go. We all sin in life and choosing to not serve a mission wont keep you out of Celestial Glory.

In August 2015, Neil L. Anderson gave a talk titled 'Faith isn't by chance, but by choice' where he gives the following story:

A month ago in Brazil, I met Aroldo Cavalcante. He was baptized at age 21, the first member of the Church in his family. His faith burned brightly, and he immediately began preparing to serve a mission. Sadly, Aroldo’s mother was diagnosed with cancer. Three months later, only days before she died, she spoke to Aroldo of her greatest concern: There were no relatives to help. Aroldo would need to take full responsibility for his two younger sisters and his younger brother. He solemnly made this promise to his dying mother.

By day he worked in a bank, and at night he attended the university. He continued to keep his baptismal covenants, but his hopes for a full-time mission were gone. His mission would be caring for his family.
Months later while preparing a sacrament meeting talk, Aroldo studied the words that Samuel reprovingly spoke to King Saul: “To obey,” he read, “is better than [to] sacrifice.” Aroldo received the seemingly impossible impression that he needed to obey the prophet’s call to serve a mission. Undaunted by the obstacles before him, he moved forward with enormous faith.

Aroldo saved every Brazilian cruzeiro he could. At age 23, he received his mission call. He told his brother how much to withdraw each month from his account for the family. Aroldo still did not have enough money to pay the full cost of his mission and the living expenses for his brother and sisters, but with faith he entered the MTC. A week later he received the first of many blessings. The bank that had employed Elder Cavalcante unexpectedly doubled the money he was to receive as he concluded his work. This miracle, along with others, provided the needed income for his mission and his family during his absence.

Twenty years later, Brother Cavalcante is now serving as the president of the Recife Brazil Boa Viagem Stake. Looking back, he said of those days, “As I tried to live righteously, I felt the Savior’s love and guidance. My faith grew, allowing me to overcome many challenges.” Aroldo’s faith did not come by chance, but by choice.

There are many Christian men and women with deep faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, and we honor and respect them.

 

 

While talking about this this with a friend of mine, he said that while on his mission he was training a missionary who said he had a spiritual impression that he neeed to go home. The mission president called them and said "that's funny you got that promoting elder, because the prophet said the spirit told him you were to come here as a missionary."

similarily I have known a certain missionary that chose to go home for the same reason and now is anti-Mormon.

my last example is an elder I knew that went home early because of severe depression that he had not before experienced, when he got home they found he had a dangerous heart disease that, if left untreated, could had lead to his death.

We hear all the time from general authorities of miracle stories where young men sacrarice  greatly to serve missions, but never of miracle stories where young men choose not to serve because of sports, music, marriage, etc. often claiming they will do one later as senior missionaries (which I also do not think is ok).

Again, I do not wish to pass judgement, but rather recognize the sin for people who may be deciding to serve or not. Many righteous members in this church did not serve (including many mission presidents).

I personally believe that regardless of what is going on, you should do everything you can to serve. 

lastly, the famous quote from Pres. Monsoon. “Every worthy, able young man should prepare to serve a mission. Missionary service is a priesthood duty—an obligation the Lord expects of us who have been given so very much. Young men, I admonish you to prepare for service as a missionary”

 

That is an arguement on what I believe. Does anyone see it differently

If you're a girl, or have a physical or mental condition, or are already a mom or dad then no you don't have any burden of volunteering. Also if you are in the military in active duty, depending on that situation that can come between being able to go on a mission (but on the other hand you do end up in a lot of missionary type situations)... in regards to that one may want to hold off on joining the military till after their mission. altho in utah the military tends to work with this and you can get a 2 year leave promised to you written in your contract (altho this was years ago, so i don't know if the recruiters still use this or not currently)

but other than those things, it's an obligation/duty for worthy male members of the church.

 

[Guest MormonGator]

The answer is yes.  

The best asset you can be to the church is to know your own strengths and weaknesses. Next, you need to know who you are and what your personality is.   Some people do not have the personalities to serve missions. Think about it-would you like to meet a missionary who is just going though the motions? What about one that just preaches to you? What about an arrogant jerk? 

[NeuroTypical]

Define "ok"...

[The Folk Prophet]

4 hours ago, DoctorLemon said:

The decision to go on a mission or not is between you and God, and absolutely no one else.

I don't know that I agree with this. Clearly the literal meaning of it is accurate. No one can literally force another to serve. But the implication that no one else has any business in the matter whatsoever? I don't believe that at all.

[estradling75]

The General Authorities have been very clear that it is the Duty of every young man to prepare for serving a full time mission.

This puts in in the category of General Commandment. (Like Thou shall Not Kill)  And general commandments can have exceptions for certain events.  Many of the exceptions for serving a mission are well known.

While it is true that it is between the Lord and the individual in question... One should not forget that the Lord has appointed Leaders in the church and has given them stewardship and authority to act on his behalf.  Thus both the individual and leaders have the responsibility (and requirement) to seek out the will of the Lord in the matter.  If they are in agreement on the matter then the course is clear.

If they don't agree then it is the responsibility of the one running counter to the will of the Lord to repent and listen better.  It is the duty of the other person to encourage the other one in this process.

[anatess2]

There are no exceptions to every young man preparing themselves to serving a full time mission to the best of their ability.  But whether they can serve or not is not a guarantee because of certain situations.  It is no different than there are no exceptions to every LDS member to strive to be temple worthy - whether they can actually enter the temple or not is not a guarantee because of certain situations.

Therefore, prepare ye, prepare ye for that which is to come.

[Traveler]

 

I have mixed feeling about serving a mission.  I strongly believe that everyone should serve a full time mission, including young ladies.  I did not always believe ladies should also serve.  My experience with sisters when I was a missionary were difficult and as a result for years I thought ladies should prepare for other things.   Currently I believe all youth should prepare for missions.  I also believe that before a person becomes an adult citizen (right to vote) in the USA that they should be required to serve 2 years in the military.   I believe military service should be considered optional but without such service someone should not be a full citizen or have full citizen status. 

I do not believe anyone should be compelled to serve in either the military or a mission.  Perhaps one of my biggest lessons of life was concerning the lack of dedication of individuals I served with both in the military and on my mission.   Often when a missionary I was asked how many missionaries were serving in the mission – my answer was – “About half of them”.   The military was another matter which was so bad that I object to calling those in the military “service men or women”.   It is not that there are no good people in the military – just that they are a minority.  The language and expected behavior when on leave for the majority of the military may not be completely deplorable – but completely deplorable is not far.

I realize that there are missionaries that are called and arrived in the mission without intent to serve that become converted to and desirous to serve a mission and that many are blessed for their partial service.   I believe that D&C section 4 sums it all up for me – in particular verse 2:

“Therefore, O ye that embark in the service of G-d, see that ye serve him with all your heart, might, mind and strength, that ye may stand blameless before G-d at the last day.”

I know it is not politically correct but I have more respect for someone that does not accept a call to serve than someone that does and in so accepting goes about it halfheartedly.

 

The Traveler

[omegaseamaster75]

18 hours ago, MormonGator said:

The answer is yes.  

The best asset you can be to the church is to know your own strengths and weaknesses. Next, you need to know who you are and what your personality is.   Some people do not have the personalities to serve missions. Think about it-would you like to meet a missionary who is just going though the motions? What about one that just preaches to you? What about an arrogant jerk? 

This of course is the correct answer, for me personally I think that if you are physically and mentally capable to serve that you should but not that you must. 

I do agree with @MormonGator, sometimes a mission is just not for you, and if it is not you should not be looked down upon or taken to task for disobedience.  You can quote our prophet if you want and say it is tantamount to a commandant but I disagree.  If you go on a mission out of obligation of because it what's expected and not because you have a true desire to serve, I think that you will be judged accordingly and far worse than those who stood their ground and stayed home for whatever reason.

18 hours ago, MormonGator said:

. Think about it-would you like to meet a missionary who is just going though the motions? 

I knew missionaries like that

18 hours ago, MormonGator said:

 What about one that just preaches to you? 

I knew those kinds also

18 hours ago, MormonGator said:

What about an arrogant jerk? 

And plenty of those.

 

[Fether]

20 hours ago, NeuroTypical said:

Define "ok"...

Is it not a sin. Can a young man choose not to serve a mission and avoid condemnation for the sin?

[Fether]

2 hours ago, omegaseamaster75 said:

This of course is the correct answer, for me personally I think that if you are physically and mentally capable to serve that you should but not that you must. 

I do agree with @MormonGator, sometimes a mission is just not for you, and if it is not you should not be looked down upon or taken to task for disobedience.  You can quote our prophet if you want and say it is tantamount to a commandant but I disagree.  If you go on a mission out of obligation of because it what's expected and not because you have a true desire to serve, I think that you will be judged accordingly and far worse than those who stood their ground and stayed home for whatever reason.

I knew missionaries like that

I knew those kinds also

And plenty of those.

 

@MormonGator

I disagree with all of this. I went in my mission because I knew I was suppose to. I felt that if I didn't  llgo, I would be ostrisized from the LDS community (which really isn't true). I began serving and within 6 months I was giving my all and loved every second of it.

i also had another friend who committed just about every sin you could to keep you from a mission and only went to avoid judgement from family. He said he lied his way through every interview in order to go. When he got out, he had an intense change of heart, confessed to the mission Pres. And later became one of the best Assistants to the President I ever had.

If your an arrogant jerk, your going to need to repent of that before entering the celestial kingdom. Same goes for those who are going through the motions.

God doesn't only use perfect missionaries who have all the right qualities. He calls us in our weakness and makes those weaknesses strong. That is how miracles are made.

I don't believe there is any circumstance besides health (which you should leave to the decision if the general authorities) that should keep a young man from a mission.

If I chose not to serve, my weaknesses I had in highschool (such as my aarogance and pride) would still be there and the strengths I have would be non existent.

Edited February 6, 2017 by Fether

[Guest MormonGator]

2 hours ago, omegaseamaster75 said:

This of course is the correct answer, for me personally I think that if you are physically and mentally capable to serve that you should but not that you must. 

I do agree with @MormonGator, sometimes a mission is just not for you, and if it is not you should not be looked down upon or taken to task for disobedience.  You can quote our prophet if you want and say it is tantamount to a commandant but I disagree.  If you go on a mission out of obligation of because it what's expected and not because you have a true desire to serve, I think that you will be judged accordingly and far worse than those who stood their ground and stayed home for whatever reason.

I knew missionaries like that

I knew those kinds also

And plenty of those.

 

Thanks bud!

Bad missionaries and members do huge, huge harm to the church. 

[Guest MormonGator]

5 minutes ago, Fether said:

 

Very glad you served and very glad it worked out for you, for sure! 

[NeuroTypical]

32 minutes ago, Fether said:

Is it not a sin. Can a young man choose not to serve a mission and avoid condemnation for the sin?

Well, 'sin' is stuff that takes you further from God, or places obstacles between you and Him.  I did not go on a mission.  Instead, I went inactive for 6 years.  Those 6 years were hardly full of closeness to God - we didn't have much of a relationship at all for those 6 years.  

'Condemnation'?  From who?  People?  I have a really hard time finding anyone interested in condemning me for my choice - most of 'em seem happy I made it back.  I know I am.  Condemnation from God?  I have it on good revealed authority He was concerned when I was away, and happy to see me come back.  Of course, I had to come back.  Plenty of people who were in my situation don't.  I had two buddies, we all sort of decided to not go on missions and we went inactive together.  I'm the only one who came back. The other two have nothing to do with the church - one had his name removed - both are pretty critical of the church and it's adherents.  

I wish I had gone on a mission.  My life has hard parts that wouldn't be there if I had gone.  Anyone sitting there trying to tally up sin and blessings and predict the future or see how undesirable something is, I tell them: Go on your mission.  Dedicate your life to something besides yourself for two years, and don't look back.  You'll avoid the pitfalls of not going, and you'll come back refined, matured, better.  

[Ironhold]

My personal story? 

When I was a teen, the stake authorities - and many ward & branch authorities - were hard-core about pushing missions. It was the obligation of all young men to go on a mission, and the obligation of young women to only date returned missionaries so as to add additional incentive for the young men to go. 

Well, during my senior year of high school, my maternal grandmother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's. My dad was transitioning from military life to a civilian job, and my older brothers were off doing their own thing. If I went anywhere, mom would have to handle things on her own. I just accepted that I'd be going to the local community college instead of acting on the recruitment mailings I'd been getting (including one to Rutgers. Rutgers). 

Instead, I ended up doing all sorts of missionary work by way of the internet. Most people who get online nowadays are lucky, they've got all sorts of outlets, and all sorts of reasonably friendly places to chat. I first got online in 2000, and I had none of that. LDS.org was barely functional, Mormon.org was a pipe dream, and the Bloggernacle wasn't even at the back of anyone's mind. Instead, the reality of the situation was that the minute you self-identified on a message board, you got dog-piled by people who had website upon website of canned arguments at their disposal, and at least some of these people also had personal grudges or even pure rage. Yes folks, back then, your "making it" was based on how many death threats you got, not page views or likes. 

So there I was, in the thick of it, learning the hard way how best to spread the gospel online while also helping to make what we know today possible. In fact, the entire reason why I got a Deviant Art account in the first place was because it was free hosting for the essays and responses I was writing at the time; stuff kept showing up so often, it was easier to just copy & past or provide a link instead of hammering it out again and again. If you like posting on Mormon Hub and routinely expect a fair amount of respect when discussing the church online, you're welcome. 

 

 

 

Unfortunately, this all meant bupkis back in the real world. 

It was made entirely too clear on entirely too many occasions that since I never wore a name tag, nothing I did mattered. Somehow, "becoming the personal bogeyman of an entire online anti-Mormon ministry because I kept shooting down their leader's conspiracy theories and rantings" was less impressive than wearing a suit and riding a bike. Entirely too many people at stake let me know again and again that I was somehow a failure, and the reminders came so often that to this day I hate having to go to stake priesthood events.

And my love life? I messed up a long-distance relationship I was in back in 2006, and take the blame for that. Why was I dating long-distance? Permanent friend zone... if I was lucky. Best-case scenario was that I was a friend, and never up for consideration for anything more. Worst-case scenario? I was now officially a nobody. And of course, the older I got and the longer I went without even so much as a girlfriend, the more people started talking... even within my own family. 

The final twist of the knife came when I went in for a temple recommend interview. The then-stake president told me that according to the advice he had received, recommends were only to be given to people who were going on missions or who were in a stable position in life. Well, I didn't go on that mission, and I was - like so many young men of that period - having career trouble because I was trying to balance work and college, so no temple recommend for me. 

Yeah. 

And people wonder why for the longest time all I wanted to do was leave town. 

[Guest MormonGator]

11 minutes ago, Ironhold said:

 

And people wonder why for the longest time all I wanted to do was leave town. 

I'm so sorry this happened to you. Heartbreaking. 

And believe me, many of us know the "I need to get out of this place rapidly" feeling. God knows I've felt it many times. The best feeling in the world is knowing that home is where you make it, for sure. 

Edited February 6, 2017 by MormonGator

[omegaseamaster75]

55 minutes ago, Fether said:

@MormonGator

I disagree with all of this. I went in my mission because I knew I was suppose to. I felt that if I didn't  llgo, I would be ostrisized from the LDS community (which really isn't true). I began serving and within 6 months I was giving my all and loved every second of it.

i also had another friend who committed just about every sin you could to keep you from a mission and only went to avoid judgement from family. He said he lied his way through every interview in order to go. When he got out, he had an intense change of heart, confessed to the mission Pres. And later became one of the best Assistants to the President I ever had.

If your an arrogant jerk, your going to need to repent of that before entering the celestial kingdom. Same goes for those who are going through the motions.

God doesn't only use perfect missionaries who have all the right qualities. He calls us in our weakness and makes those weaknesses strong. That is how miracles are made.

I don't believe there is any circumstance besides health (which you should leave to the decision if the general authorities) that should keep a young man from a mission.

If I chose not to serve, my weaknesses I had in highschool (such as my aarogance and pride) would still be there and the strengths I have would be non existent.

Cool story, but you outline exceptions.  Talk to your buddy who was the AP he will tell you all about the terrible missionaries who would have been better served staying working on their testimony and maturity.

I also was an AP.  I know first hand how young men and women who are pressured into the mission field serve, and it is not to the betterment of the church.  They would have been better off staying home....

[Ironhold]

2 minutes ago, omegaseamaster75 said:

Cool story, but you outline exceptions.  Talk to your buddy who was the AP he will tell you all about the terrible missionaries who would have been better served staying working on their testimony and maturity.

I also was an AP.  I know first hand how young men and women who are pressured into the mission field serve, and it is not to the betterment of the church.  They would have been better off staying home....

QFT. 

It seemed like entirely too many leaders had to learn the hard way that there's a large number of members who would do better *not* going on missions, either because their skills lend themselves to other tasks or because they're in no shape to be going. 

[Ironhold]

10 minutes ago, MormonGator said:

I'm so sorry this happened to you. Heartbreaking. 

And believe me, many of us know the "I need to get out of this place rapidly" feeling. God knows I've felt it many times. The best feeling in the world is knowing that home is where you make it, for sure. 

Thanks. 

There's a reason why "Mary Jane's Last Dance" was basically my personal theme song for a few years. 

"Tired of screwing up / tired of going down / tired of my self / tired of this town"...

[Guest]

If it is a choice -- No.

Edited February 6, 2017 by Guest

[Jane_Doe]

1 minute ago, Carborendum said:

If it is a choice -- No.

Then you cannot say that you view LDS missionaries as volunteers.