JustRain

Just got endowments out.... garment sizing issues :-/

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So I just got my endowments out, and I'm having a hard time finding the correct size and trying to get comfortable in them. They measured me a few times but so far, everything feels too big or just doesn't fit. I felt like I was swimming in the ones I wore in the temple and they were barely staying on. My bra was (and is) also moving around like crazy. They told me to wear it over my garment top, but it only caused (and is causing) my shoulder straps to fall and my band to constantly move around, not staying in place or giving me support. I didn't have that issue before wearing garments. I currently have 2 bottoms they semi fit and 1 top that is too big & too long, and the rest of the tops I got are all too small & too long. The nearest store is over 40 mins away, and they don't carry every size/style that they have online.

My other issue is, I have limited clothing since I have a hard time finding anything I feel comfortable in and that fits. Clothing shopping has never been easy for me. I always buy what's comfortable and modest, but now due to my garment top, my shirts aren't fitting, and the garment top is so long that it shows. I've tried tucking it in, but due to my jeans it's not working well and requires constant adjusting, unless I don't move. I now only have a few Sunday dresses to wear, and nothing to wear to work...

Any suggestions? I feel like I'm at a loss. I don't want to not wear my garments, I want to be able to continually wear them, but I really need to be able to wear my clothes.

 

 

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I must not be understanding. To me, this sounds like a simple fix. Get a size or two smaller. Use the ones that are too big for when you need to do laundry (I tend to wear my "old" garments when I'm doing laundry).  Also, you may find that you wear different sizes depending on the fabric. And it is completely up to you on what you feel comfortable with. I have friends who like their garments to be very snug. Some like them looser fitting. If you have garments that you have not opened, you can return those.

As far as the bra issue, you can wear your bra under your garments. I think we were told at one time to wear our garments next to our skin, but, bras are not made to be worn over clothing. Thus, in order for your bra to fit right, wear it next to your skin. 

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I went to michaels the craft store and bought tiny industrial strength magnets. I use these to keep the garments in place. I am 4.5 hours from the nearest distribution center! I would order a variety of sizes to try on in different fabrics....let's face it, garments are pretty cheap. If the garment is too long, try ordering a petite. I don't try to wear things like cap sleeves because my garments are always going to poke out. You are going to get the hang of this, I promise!

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2 hours ago, beefche said:

I must not be understanding. To me, this sounds like a simple fix. Get a size or two smaller. Use the ones that are too big for when you need to do laundry (I tend to wear my "old" garments when I'm doing laundry).  Also, you may find that you wear different sizes depending on the fabric. And it is completely up to you on what you feel comfortable with. I have friends who like their garments to be very snug. Some like them looser fitting. If you have garments that you have not opened, you can return those.

As far as the bra issue, you can wear your bra under your garments. I think we were told at one time to wear our garments next to our skin, but, bras are not made to be worn over clothing. Thus, in order for your bra to fit right, wear it next to your skin. 

I was told in the temple to wear it over my garments. May I ask where you got your information? I just want to be sure I am properly wearing my garments.

What confuses me most is most of the sizing for the tops, is by bra size, and there's no actual "small/med/large" with those sizes, except a few without the bra size... which aren't the style I'm not interested in. I wish they'd have the actual size, plus the bra size with it, so it's be the actual size. Unfortunately the ladies at the store weren't very helpful, and only made me feel more frustrated and lost.

 

2 hours ago, Sunday21 said:

I went to michaels the craft store and bought tiny industrial strength magnets. I use these to keep the garments in place. I am 4.5 hours from the nearest distribution center! I would order a variety of sizes to try on in different fabrics....let's face it, garments are pretty cheap. If the garment is too long, try ordering a petite. I don't try to wear things like cap sleeves because my garments are always going to poke out. You are going to get the hang of this, I promise!

I'm not a fan of the cap sleeve, but all the other neck lines don't give me enough space to work with, with any of my clothes. I wish I had the money to go buy a whole new wardrobe, but I don't. I can't even work at this point due to the garment issue. I feel like my only option to be able work would be to not wear my garments, but I don't want to do that.

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I have found that garments are really a trial and error kind of thing. It's really hard to find what fits you best. Have you tired different materials? The Distribution Center use to never let you try on garments but they do now ( at least here in Salt Lake). I would call your Distribution Center and ask them if they would allow you to try them on before buying. If you can't I would buy several different sizes (smaller ones) with different materials. Also when you go next ask for the most experienced worker there to help me. Usually they know the garments pretty well and can help you a lot if you explain the problems you are having.

It has always been my understanding that you should wear your bra on top of your garments. But some people on this forum have suggested other wise. I don't know if there is anything that is official. But I would say it's better for someone to wear their garments at all times, if that means they have to wear their bra underneath the garments then I think that's better than not wearing them at all.

 

Edited by miav

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2 hours ago, beefche said:

As far as the bra issue, you can wear your bra under your garments. I think we were told at one time to wear our garments next to our skin, but, bras are not made to be worn over clothing. Thus, in order for your bra to fit right, wear it next to your skin. 

IMO, if the instruction in the temple was to not do this, one should not do this (unless further instruction received in the temple indicates it's a personal choice).

Eventually, you learn to adapt / figure out what works.  The human body can adjust to things far better than our conscious self wants to admit.  It just takes time.  (Which isn't to say you don't find the best sizes and fabrics possible, just that one shouldn't assume it's impossible to adjust regardless of our initial impression.)

Also, if one's outer clothing is not already suited for wearing over garments, then it may be necessary to get different outer clothing.  If you cannot afford new clothing, please go talk to your bishop.  There may be something he can do to assist.

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I was told when I received my endowment to wear my garments next to my skin.

Later in life, I spoke to the temple matron about female things and garments. She assured me that while garments are sacred they are also underwear and to wear my garments as needed to fit my female needs. I asked her point blank if that meant that I didn't have to wear the garment next to my skin and she said that no, there are times when it wouldn't be sensible.

I have some bras that I wear on top of my garments and I have some that I wear next to my skin as they will not stay in place if placed over the garment.

You can always ask to speak with the temple matron next time you are at the temple. You can then speak to her about your concerns and receive her counsel. I will say that it has been my experience that church leaders are not so authoritative about how we keep our covenants. They give guidelines and then allow us to make our own decisions. 

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7 minutes ago, beefche said:

she said that no, there are times when it wouldn't be sensible.

I agree that sometimes females do need to where underwear under their garments, especially during certain times during the month. When I first got my garments the lady helping me told me it was ok to do so. It didn't come from the matron of the temple, but someone who had work many years in the distribution center. 

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I asked the temple matron once about the bras, and she said that is just lore and some Type A personalities getting Type Bs spreading said lore. I generally wear my bra under the garment. 

Yeah, trial and error, really. Like any undergarment when you get fancier than basic panties. I was told back in the day to go a size smaller than I think I need and this advice has served me well.

I also have different garments for different outfits.

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1 hour ago, miav said:

I have found that garments are really a trial and error kind of thing. It's really hard to find what fits you best. Have you tired different materials? The Distribution Center use to never let you try on garments but they do now ( at least here in Salt Lake). I would call your Distribution Center and ask them if they would allow you to try them on before buying. If you can't I would buy several different sizes (smaller ones) with different materials. Also when you go next ask for the most experienced worker there to help me. Usually they know the garments pretty well and can help you a lot if you explain the problems you are having.

It has always been my understanding that you should where your bra on top of your garments. But some people on this forum have suggested other wise. I don't know if there is anything that is official. But I would say it's better for someone to wear their garments at all times, if that means they have to wear their bra underneath the garments then I think that's better than not wearing them at all.

 

I've tried a few different materials. I found one I hate to pieces and one I like, but it doesn't come in the top I want. All of the other fabrics that I felt in store, I didn't like. I'm hoping to make a trip there soon... I'll have to see what they say, as I need something that fits and that I feel comfortable in asap.

1 hour ago, zil said:

Eventually, you learn to adapt / figure out what works.  The human body can adjust to things far better than our conscious self wants to admit.  It just takes time.  (Which isn't to say you don't find the best sizes and fabrics possible, just that one shouldn't assume it's impossible to adjust regardless of our initial impression.)

Also, if one's outer clothing is not already suited for wearing over garments, then it may be necessary to get different outer clothing.  If you cannot afford new clothing, please go talk to your bishop.  There may be something he can do to assist.

I have a very hard time adapting to things, especially clothes. I've struggled with health issues and some of it relates to texture and how things fit. It's why shopping is so hard for me. I've been working through things in therapy, but there are times where I reach my limit and have issues.

My clothing is modest, I've always made sure of that. For this reason, I don't feel like I should have to go buy new clothes. If my clothing wasn't modest, I could understand needing to buy new clothes. I also constantly asked others who wear garments about my clothes and if I'd still be able to wear them with them, and I was told yes.

1 hour ago, beefche said:

I was told when I received my endowment to wear my garments next to my skin.

Later in life, I spoke to the temple matron about female things and garments. She assured me that while garments are sacred they are also underwear and to wear my garments as needed to fit my female needs. I asked her point blank if that meant that I didn't have to wear the garment next to my skin and she said that no, there are times when it wouldn't be sensible.

I have some bras that I wear on top of my garments and I have some that I wear next to my skin as they will not stay in place if placed over the garment.

You can always ask to speak with the temple matron next time you are at the temple. You can then speak to her about your concerns and receive her counsel. I will say that it has been my experience that church leaders are not so authoritative about how we keep our covenants. They give guidelines and then allow us to make our own decisions. 

Thank you! I'll have to talk with her next time I go. I didn't even think to ask while I was there receiving my endowments because I always thought it was a rule or standard. It's what my mother was taught, etc.

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2 hours ago, JustRain said:

I was told in the temple to wear it over my garments. May I ask where you got your information? I just want to be sure I am properly wearing my garments.

For obvious reasons, I have no first-hand experience with this. But Sister Vort has always worn her bra over her garment, since we got married. As far as I know, she has never had any real problem with that. She wears a cotton/poly blend garment, which perhaps is better than e.g. a 100% polyester or other artificial fabric.

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When I first got garments, I received a variety of advice re how to wear garments with a bra. I prayed about the over/under issue. The response that I received was that either was fine. 

I am a temple worker. Temple workers are not perfect! They have been trained by people who were not perfect. Yes you need to wear the garments and you can't take the scissors to them, but don't obsess. Pray and ask for guidance. Relax. You will get the hang of the garments. I promise. Take this journey with prayer. 

Re necklines. I use the magnets to pull the blouse neckline up to the point that it covers the garment. No one has ever mentioned the little magnets and my ward is very .....well making intrusive remarks about your appearance is very much the thing in my ward! Got to love them! 

Edited by Sunday21

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Dear @JustRain

Please please do not make garments the issue that separates you from the church. I promise that you will find a combination that suits you but it may take sometime. Don't let the aggravation of garments get under your skin. There have been times at which, I have worn only part of the garments (forgot to pack enough!)  or taken off part of the garments during the work day. I am female, it's part of life,

if you are ever making a change in life, it is useful to ask yourself, Do i tend  to be too hard on myself or not hard enough? Do I obsess or do I ignore important details? If you were going to fly from one country to another, how often would you check to see that you had your passport? Every 30 seconds is too often. Never is not often enough. Try to get yourself away from either extreme.

Good luck and remember the ultimate goal is to return to Heavenly Father. He loves you!

 

 

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12 hours ago, JustRain said:

I was told in the temple to wear it over my garments. May I ask where you got your information? I just want to be sure I am properly wearing my garments.

What confuses me most is most of the sizing for the tops, is by bra size, and there's no actual "small/med/large" with those sizes, except a few without the bra size... which aren't the style I'm not interested in. I wish they'd have the actual size, plus the bra size with it, so it's be the actual size. Unfortunately the ladies at the store weren't very helpful, and only made me feel more frustrated and lost.

I flat out point blank asked the Temple Matron about this: you do NOT have to wear your bra over your garments.  There is NO statement saying that you have too, but rather it is the women's choice.  For myself, I am very large breasted woman (I have to order specialty large bras that cost ~$100 a pop) so it's just impossible for me wear my bra over.  And any piece of clothing that has a "built in bra" is just a no-go for me, so that out rules some garment tops and don't get me started on swimming suits.

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Garments are very personal.  Every woman is unique (and I'm sure man too).  What works for some wouldn't work for others.  For example - bra over garments doesn't work for me.  But, I also don't feel comfortable having something between me and the garments.  So, I solved it by getting the Carinesa material and ditching the bra.  But then I wear regular panties under my garments for that time of month.

Anyway, I get my garments in a special size from online distribution.  I take my measurements, send it to the distribution center, I tell them what material I want and they ship me garments.

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1 hour ago, Sunday21 said:

Dear @JustRain

Please please do not make garments the issue that separates you from the church. I promise that you will find a combination that suits you but it may take sometime. Don't let the aggravation of garments get under your skin. There have been times at which, I have worn only part of the garments (forgot to pack enough!)  or taken off part of the garments during the work day. I am female, it's part of life,

if you are ever making a change in life, it is useful to ask yourself, Do i tend  to be too hard on myself or not hard enough? Do I obsess or do I ignore important details? If you were going to fly from one country to another, how often would you check to see that you had your passport? Every 30 seconds is too often. Never is not often enough. Try to get yourself away from either extreme.

Good luck and remember the ultimate goal is to return to Heavenly Father. He loves you!

 

 

Thank you so much for your kind words. It was much needed. I love my garments, beyond words that I can say. I've been so overwhelmed by the spirit and my own troubles in life, that I haven't been able contain my tears. I do not feel like I should remove my garments, it feels weird with them on and off.... lol, go figure. Though, how does one stop the bottoms from bunching up, and rolling up? I'm unable to do the spandex material as it doesn't breathe well on my skin.

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18 minutes ago, JustRain said:

Thank you so much for your kind words. It was much needed. I love my garments, beyond words that I can say. I've been so overwhelmed by the spirit and my own troubles in life, that I haven't been able contain my tears. I do not feel like I should remove my garments, it feels weird with them on and off.... lol, go figure. Though, how does one stop the bottoms from bunching up, and rolling up? I'm unable to do the spandex material as it doesn't breathe well on my skin.

The answer is, of course, the Carinessa fabric which is the fabric that is spandex material, which is what you don't like.  Ugh.  But, but, but... I'm thinking about this and I think that the curling only matters if you're wearing pants.  So, maybe the calf-length bottoms is what will work for you for the days you wear pants.  Calf-length ones don't curl.  Then you can wear the regular length for non-pants days.

By the way... just a tip that might help you... I just bought a bunch of shirts from Walmart for $1.99 each.  They're the thin very breathable shirts with the capped sleeves that comes in all kinds of colors.  I bought all the colors.  I wear them under sun tops - they're either made of lacy material with all those sheer sections on the shoulders or down the back, so the colored shirts become part of the top to "plug" the sheer sections.  I bought a few of those sun tops from Walmart for under 10 bucks.  Some of them are fancy enough to wear to work with plain skirts or slacks (also from Walmart for under $15).

Edited by anatess2

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On 4/17/2017 at 9:33 AM, anatess2 said:

The answer is, of course, the Carinessa fabric which is the fabric that is spandex material, which is what you don't like.  Ugh.  But, but, but... I'm thinking about this and I think that the curling only matters if you're wearing pants.  So, maybe the calf-length bottoms is what will work for you for the days you wear pants.  Calf-length ones don't curl.  Then you can wear the regular length for non-pants days.

By the way... just a tip that might help you... I just bought a bunch of shirts from Walmart for $1.99 each.  They're the thin very breathable shirts with the capped sleeves that comes in all kinds of colors.  I bought all the colors.  I wear them under sun tops - they're either made of lacy material with all those sheer sections on the shoulders or down the back, so the colored shirts become part of the top to "plug" the sheer sections.  I bought a few of those sun tops from Walmart for under 10 bucks.  Some of them are fancy enough to wear to work with plain skirts or slacks (also from Walmart for under $15).

I took a look at the calf leg ones. It only comes in natural waist, and anything natural waist never fits me sadly. I grew up with baggy jeans because everything always would fall down to my lower waist. It's just my body type unfortunately. I am so thankful they have low rise bottoms, or I would be having more issues. I just wish more of the tops would come in Dri Lux. I love the fabric more than the others. It feels the best next to my skin, but I may have to settle with the cotton/poly :-/.

Thank you for the tip! Clothes shopping has never been my thing.

Edited by JustRain
not finished

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You can also special order garments. I have never done a special order but plan to do so. I have a sensory issue and have problems with the way clothes feel so I understand why it's so hard for you to find the right fit(not sure if you have a sensory issue or not). It is possible that you can special order a different kind of top in Dri-Lux. And they can probaby make the calf length low rise. 

Edited by miav

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35 minutes ago, JustRain said:

I took a look at the calf leg ones. It only comes in natural waist, and anything natural waist never fits me sadly. I grew up with baggy jeans because everything always would fall down to my lower waist. It's just my body type unfortunately. I am so thankful they have low rise bottoms, or I would be having more issues. I just wish more of the tops would come in Dri Lux. I love the fabric more than the others. It feels the best next to my skin, but I may have to settle with the cotton/poly :-/.

Thank you for the tip! Clothes shopping has never been my thing.

Have you tried taking your exact measurements and having garments sized especially for your unique body type?  You can order special sizes in any fabric from the online distribution center.  The keep your measurements for 2 years and then you just submit a new set of measurements if your old one expires.

Edited by anatess2

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59 minutes ago, miav said:

You can also special order garments. I have never done a special order but plan to do so. I have a sensory issue and have problems with the way clothes feel so I understand why it's so hard for you to find the right fit(not sure ofnyou have a sensory issue or not). It is possible that you can special order a different kind of top in Dri-Lux. And they can probaby make the calf length low rise. 

I may have to look into special ordering some, but I need to at least have something in the meantime. I have a sensory issue also, so I know how you feel. I think for the most part I just need to find out what size in their tops, because the one they have me listed it is too big. Their sizing is way off for me, but with like any brand, they all have their own sizing.

 

53 minutes ago, anatess2 said:

Have you tried taking your exact measurements and having garments sized especially for your unique body type?  You can order special sizes in any fabric from the online distribution center.  The keep your measurements for 2 years and then you just submit a new set of measurements if your old one expires.

I'm tempted! The only downside is I'm going through weight changes right now. The joys of weight loss, finding things that fit and you love to only not be able to wear them and have to get something else. I'll consider it more once my weight is stable. Thank you for the information! :)

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Meanwhile in Man World:

"YAY! Just got endowed!" Fether yells. He hops on over to nearest Distribution Center, buys random sized garments he think will fit and lives happily ever after.

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So I went back, bought more sizes, more styles. Nothing fits right... I even bought a petite in one size, and it's the same length as the regular. They also won't fit under any of my daily clothes. Finding clothes for me is like a needle in a haystack, as I also suffer from an eating disorder, which comes along with body image issues. The garments have only made me feel worse about my body :(. I don't know if special ordering is going to help or not. I know they are a gift, and that is why I love them. It's just hard to have a gift that creates problems that were once under control. I've gone through a lot of therapy for my eating disorder, and I was doing so well, I was almost done, but now it's back. I know it's just my body that has these issues, but I feel like I'm at a loss either way. I either am unable to sleep, eat well, and wear the garment, or not wear it and feel bad. So I really don't know what to do.

Edited by JustRain

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