How Being The Only Mormon Has Affected My Faith


RooTheMormon
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If you have read any of my other posts, you know I am the the only mormon in my intermediate family. All of my LDS friends were raised LDS. LDS parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc. They were born in the church, raised in the church, and will one day (most of them) will start a family in the church. Their parents are always helping them to complete personal progress and going to church with them. They get to do family home evening, and they say prayers together before dinner. But not me. I was and am raised in a non-LDS home. A great one, but a home of heathens. I love my family to death, and I would never change anything about them ever. But my family arent just heathens, they also disagree with mormon values.

I was baptized in July of 2013 at 9 years old. My parents told me that even if they disagreed, they would always support me. I would wake up at 6 AM on Sunday to get ready for church. I would go to church with one of my neighbors (they would take turns of who would take me, God bless them all.) At church I was the only girl in my class with 5 boys, and our teachers would always bring treats and I wuld be the only one to earn one.

For a while I left church. I became something I wished I wasnt. Then I moved to a new city, and I was invited to Girls Camp. Since I had just turned 12, I would get to do my first year at the right age. I was so nervous, but so excited. Camp that year, now looking at it, was definitely a blessing Heavenly Father made for me. Never had I ever felt the spirit so strong. All these girls, in everything we did, I could feel their testimonies. At the testimony campfire I balled my eyes out. I wanted to feel that feeling again. I felt so warm and happy and thankful. I knew it was the spirit that I was feeling.

After camp I started going to church again. I went to YW and campfires. I knew with all my heart I was doing the right thing. At home I felt so confused. I didnt know whether I could choose between the church, and following what my parents set as standards for me. My family would buy me immodest clothing, and I felt pressured to wear it, becayse I feel bad when people spend their hard earned money on things I dont even use. I tomorrow tried as much as my parents would allow me to be modest, and I tried to ignore their rude comments about the church. 

After about a year, my parents work schedules changed, and Sunday was the inly day they both had off. Thats when my mom decided I wasnt allowed to go to church anymore. She said that I was no longer putting family first, and that always comes first.

So now I am not allowed to go to church. She occasionally lets me go to YWs, but I always feel guilty about it. I still read tge scriptures, say my prayers, read LDS articles, and do other things to help my faith.

I know that my Heavenly Father knows that I am not going to church because I cant, not because I dont want to. I also know that he loves me and will help me feel the spirit even though I cannot attend church.

Being the only mormon in my family has strenghtened my faith in ways that are so hard to explain. Im not saying that those raised LDS arent as faithful, but they have never had to experience the trials of parents who disagree with them, and not having anyone right their to talk about relgion with. Being the only mormon has strengthened me, because I have to try not to give up on my religion, because there is no one there pushing me through it. No one telling me to read my scriptures and say my prayers. 

I am always told that I am being a good influence to my family. I know that my family will not be influenced by me, because I know who they are, but I can show them and teach them and help them find their way if they are willing.

People always tell me I am so tough. I know I have been through many trials in faith, but I wouldnt say I am tough. Sure religion is hard, but I find it is always easiest to choose the right, because choosing a choice that will make you ahppy is an obvious decision.

 Some people tell me I am lucky because I could wear tank tops if I wanted to and wear a bikini if I wanted to and wear exposing shirts if I wanted to because my parents dont care about that stuff like LDS parents do. And I think I am lucky, because its a test of faith. Will I choose to make the right choice that Heavenly Father wants for me? People with LDS parents dont get that, because their parents wont give them that option.

Anyways, Id like to share with you all, that no matter what trials you face and what influences you have, if you are able to push through, you will come out stronger than you ever thought you could be. Pray, and Heaveny Father will help you.

**Please dont leave negative comments. I am just expressing my feelings, and I dont care to know if you disagree with them.

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14 hours ago, RooTheMormon said:

**Please dont leave negative comments. I am just expressing my feelings, and I dont care to know if you disagree with them.

Why on earth would anyone leave any negative comments!?!  I'd guarantee that anyone who did would get pounced on by the rest of the forum members for picking on you at this point.

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And it came to pass that they did call on the name of the Lord, in their might, even until they had all fallen to the earth, save it were one of the Lamanitish women, whose name was Abish, she having been converted unto the Lord for many years, on account of a remarkable vision of her father—

Alma 19:16

I can't think of many people in my life who are as dedicated to the faith as you are.  While we aren't supposed to encourage you to go against your parents' wishes, I really am impressed that you're willing to do everything you can do within their restrictions to stay true to the faith.

I think that if you stay true in your heart, you will have blessings that you can't fully understand right now.  We'll all be praying for you.  And you're always welcome on this forum.

(Perhaps you ought to change your moniker to "Abish")

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You have such a strong testimony of the gospel, and of Heavenly Father's love for you. You are exactly right. He understands your circumstances. He knows you, and your heart, and what you desire. Keep that fire in your heart and that testimony of what you know to be true. I remember being that age (it wasn't all that long ago) and it is a very trying time. I can guarantee and promise you that as you progress through the next years of your life, and as you go through high school, that the testimony you have of God and this gospel will be the strongest foundation you could ever build. It will help you determine right from wrong in every scenario. It will lead you to where you are meant to be. 

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