Mad at Modesty

[Guest]

7 minutes ago, Dillon said:

...some women, dress to show off and and for attention. 

An interesting thing you may soon learn is that this is sort of correct, but not in the way you think.  Most of the time, they don't dress to impress men.  They dress to impress and compete with other women.

[Blueskye2]

14 minutes ago, mordorbund said:

You can. Well, maybe not all day, but when you're not at work or church, sure.

My mom tells me she flew from across the country to meet her future in-laws. She was picked up by my grandpa dressed in PJ's. When he was at work, he would dress according to the dress code, but once he was home he would dress as comfortably as he could. And if he had to run an errand, he wasn't going to change for it.

I always run into people I know. I'd die to be seen in sweat pants let alone pajamas. My momma raised me to dress properly when going out and that has stuck. When I was just a wee one, one summer day, mom says let's go shopping so I pile in the car, and she sends me back into the house to change out of my shorts,  because of course one does not go downtown in shorts! What I feel I can get away with is jeans. ? For airplane rides I cheat and wear jeans with elastic waste. Lol.

When I work from home, better believe it, I'm in my PJs and will change out the top and put on some makeup for video conf calls. Yay for work from home days! (And I'd never tell my mom this is how I role.)

Edited September 1, 2017 by Blueskye2

[Blueskye2]

2 minutes ago, Carborendum said:

An interesting thing you may soon learn is that this is sort of correct, but not in the way you think.  Most of the time, they don't dress to impress men.  They dress to impress and compete with other women.

So true. 

[Jane_Doe]

1 hour ago, Dillon said:

 I dont know how you are taking my comments like I am sending out so much hate.  

You don't see how you're being offensive?  I'll explain then:

One of your comments was "Its always amusing to hear a woman cry foul about how its not her problem a man cant keep his eyes off of them or that she distracts them with her clothing, or lack there of."

How this is degrading to every one of the >1,000,000,000 women out there have been have been molested.... ok, do I REALLY need to explain how you laughing here is degrading? 

How this is degrading every good man and woman who's learned self control: they worked hard for years to control themselves. You're trivializing and discarding their efforts.

How this is offensive to God: He gave man agency.  You comment here is scoffing at that gift and enslaving yourself to the natural man-- while laughing in God's face.

 

Do you see now?

Edited September 1, 2017 by Jane_Doe

[Dillon]

5 minutes ago, Jane_Doe said:

You don't see how you're being offensive?  I'll explain then:

One of your comments was "Its always amusing to hear a woman cry foul about how its not her problem a man cant keep his eyes off of them or that she distracts them with her clothing, or lack there of."

How this is offensive to every one of the >1,000,000,000 women out there have been have been molested.... ok, do I REALLY need to explain how you laughing here is  is offensive? 

How this is offensive every good man and woman who's learned self control: they worked hard for years to control themselves. You're trivializing and discarding thier efforts.

How this is offensive to God: He gave man agency.  You comment here is scoffing at that gift and enslaving yourself to the natural man-- while laughing in God's face.

 

Do you see now?

Well maybe I could of worded some comments differently,  they sounded a lot more harsh than I intended.

[Dillon]

18 minutes ago, Blueskye2 said:

So true. 

 

20 minutes ago, Carborendum said:

An interesting thing you may soon learn is that this is sort of correct, but not in the way you think.  Most of the time, they don't dress to impress men.  They dress to impress and compete with other women.

Yes I can agree with that.

[Jane_Doe]

1 hour ago, Dillon said:

Well maybe I could of worded some comments differently,  they sounded a lot more harsh than I intended.

That's a non-answer.  Please answer.

@Dillon, do you see how your comments are degrading to every man, woman, and child who has ever strived to fight off the natural man or has been a victim to the natural-man deeds of another?  Do you see how your comments are offensive to  God?

Edited September 1, 2017 by Jane_Doe

[Vort]

1 hour ago, SilentOne said:

It's actually a lot easier to confuse the males and females through the internet.

You don't say?

[Backroads]

7 hours ago, Dillon said:

I just wish women would own up to why they dress the way they do.

Honestly? Most women dress the way they do to feel good about themselves. There, I admit it. I dress the way I do so I feel attractive (not sexy), but pleasant and approachable and happy. (And yes, I own a lot of floral-print stuff .)

Now, there are situations--many situations--where this "feeling good about oneself" translates into sex appeal. Maybe intentionally, maybe unintentionally. They might subscribe to the culture where the sexy dress is something of a norm and no longer "outrageously sexy" in their minds. 

Sure, there's probably a fair count of women who dress how they dress in order to wrangle in a man, but I would venture that the majority just want to feel pretty.

Edited September 1, 2017 by Backroads

[Backroads]

3 hours ago, Carborendum said:

An interesting thing you may soon learn is that this is sort of correct, but not in the way you think.  Most of the time, they don't dress to impress men.  They dress to impress and compete with other women.

This ain't wrong. 

Definitely more true than an all-consuming get me a man dressing.

[Jane_Doe]

Things influencing clothing decisions besides sex-appeal the opposite sex:

- Comfort.

- Practicalness of the outfit (weather fitting, work fitting, etc)

-"I feel pretty!"  (This is very different than "Joe thinks I'm pretty")

-Wanting to give an air of confidence to yourself and others (aka "Dress to impress")

-I'm too lazy to do laundry and this outfit was clean 

Etc.

[Backroads]

3 minutes ago, Jane_Doe said:

-"I feel pretty!"  (This is very different than "Joe thinks I'm pretty")

I don't know if there is a way to make the male mind fully comprehend the female "I feel pretty". Because it really has nothing to do with a guy or, really, anyone else.

[Jane_Doe]

1 hour ago, Backroads said:

I don't know if there is a way to make the male mind fully comprehend the female "I feel pretty". Because it really has nothing to do with a guy or, really, anyone else.

That's an interesting question....

I'm going to start a thread on it!  Why?  Cause I can.

[BeccaKirstyn]

3 hours ago, Dillon said:

Ok now that I have apologized, lets move on and I will learn from that.   I dont know how you are taking my comments like I am sending out so much hate. Now I understand its always a very slippery, tricky, and very narrow narrow slope when you start "insulting" females. And I only use the term "insulting" because as from what I can gather from your responses,  that's what you guys are saying I am doing, ALL I was doing was giving my opinion from observation. Now shall I quote the scriptures from Isiah about the daughters of Zion in the last days? Anyone?  So if the Lord is that upset with the daughters of Zion, I dont think my opinions are that far off base when I say that women,  oops- some women, dress to show off and and for attention. 

Just when I thought the hole you dug yourself into was starting to refill itself with some common sense...*face palm*

[Jane_Doe]

1 hour ago, Jane_Doe said:

That's an interesting question....

I'm going to start a thread on it!  Why?  Cause I can.

I can and I did

 

[anatess2]

5 hours ago, Carborendum said:

Wow.  Even through the internet all Asians look the same.  Even when one is male and the other is female.

Aspanic! 

[Guest]

3 hours ago, Vort said:

You don't say?

You and Mordor are obvious exceptions.

Edited September 2, 2017 by Guest

[mirkwood]

7 hours ago, Carborendum said:

Who wouldn't be?  They're a great investment.

http://www.asianmetal.com/

 

[Guest]

1 minute ago, mirkwood said:

<video>

Oh!  The expression on Mrs. Carb's face as she saw that video...  PRICELESS!!!

[Guest MormonGator]

56 minutes ago, mirkwood said:

 

This was really good. 

[a mustard seed]

12 hours ago, anatess2 said:

If there was this girl in our ward (we actually do have this girl in our ward... I wish it was just an issue with a tie.  She thinks she is in love with my son.  She has some kind of mental illness that makes her difficult to teach and she likes to be very touchy/feely and has no tact-filter.)... anyway, if this tie-challenged girl was in our ward, it would be my son telling me to make sure grandpa doesn't take offense when he comes to church never seeing him wear grandpa's tie.  Seriously.  A tie is such a non-issue that my son will gladly wear a different one to help a fellowman.  This actually happened in our ward.  When my son was a deacon, the young men went through this bow-tie phase.  They all wore bow-ties like it was some kind of bow-tie club.  The bishop took my son to his office and told him he wants him to wear a regular tie.  No big deal to him.  He never wore his bow-tie to church again.

Now, as far as how he's dealing with the touchy-feely girl... he tries to avoid her but he won't run off when he's already sitting and the girl comes rushing to sit with him.  But he does constantly remind her - please don't do that.  It's not appropriate.  I've asked him - are you okay, do you need me to run interference - and he always says, no mom, she's cool.  She doesn't come to church often and my son sometimes asks me if it's bad that he feels relieved she didn't come to church.  I just tell him we all have our crosses big and small and it's not bad to give them to Simon for a while.

But then, that's just how I'm teaching my sons.  It's pretty straight forward and simple.

The two examples you've given are exactly those situations that I've stated I'd make exemptions, no questions asked for: Bishop and mental deficiencies. I would consider this girl, who has a lack of filter and a lack of boundaries, despite her capabilities otherwise being fine, as falling into that "I know it when I see it" category. She doesn't have to have a label of mental deficiency but you know there's things she's missing and I of course would be compassionate and sensitive to that.

---

It's a bit exhausting when people don't read what you're saying and instead just jump to assumptions like "so if you won't do this innocuous thing that might not even be helpful without guidance from the Spirit, then does that mean you question EVERYTHING the Lord has actually told you to do already??? What? You can't be charitable and just listen to the whims of anybody who demands anything of you? You have to talk to the Lord or one of his appointed servants first? How selfish!" So, I'll state it again because this did change from my first post to my latest ones:

I don't know what someone truly needs or how to help them with 100% certainty. Even friends and people you are close to, you might not have the full story or truly know their heart. So, in all situations of charity, I would not trust in my own wisdom to judge whether they need or don't need a certain kind of help from me, regardless of what they ask for. I'd pray about it, I would study it, I would fast, and I would become more involved with the person's life as a friend and a sister, so that I could understand the situation better. If the Spirit told me to do something I WOULD DO IT. If the Bishop told me to do something, I WOULD DO IT.

Again, for those in the back with reading comprehension problems and/or a really weird, personal investment in this vein of the discussion: I'll state again because this did change from my first post to my latest ones: If the Spirit told me to do something, I WOULD DO IT. If the Bishop told me to do something, I WOULD DO IT. I will always trust the Lord's wisdom and perspective more than my own.

[pam]

7 hours ago, Carborendum said:

An interesting thing you may soon learn is that this is sort of correct, but not in the way you think.  Most of the time, they don't dress to impress men.  They dress to impress and compete with other women.

That is actually quite true.  I know that's how it was for me in the day.  Now a days..I just don't care.

[BJ64]

On 8/30/2017 at 8:52 AM, Grunt said:

The main reason I haven't been baptized is I look so good in a speedo.   I can't deny that to the world.  

I assume you are making a joke here but I look good in them too and I wear them at a public pool several times a week. 

I’ve been wearing them since I was a teenager. I swim laps and swim briefs are what swimmers wear. I don’t think that are immodest and I don’t worry about what others may think. A swim brief is as modest as a typical one piece woman’s suit. 

Besides, I don’t think I’m responsible for another persons thoughts be that woman or man.

I don't go for the idea that a woman is responsible for men’s thoughts. Everyone is responsible for their own actions and thoughts.   

[Grunt]

6 hours ago, BJ64 said:

I assume you are making a joke here but I look good in them too and I wear them at a public pool several times a week. 

I’ve been wearing them since I was a teenager. I swim laps and swim briefs are what swimmers wear. I don’t think that are immodest and I don’t worry about what others may think. A swim brief is as modest as a typical one piece woman’s suit. 

Besides, I don’t think I’m responsible for another persons thoughts be that woman or man.

I don't go for the idea that a woman is responsible for men’s thoughts. Everyone is responsible for their own actions and thoughts.   

It has nothing to do with the thoughts of another.  It has to do with modesty.

[BJ64]

1 hour ago, Grunt said:

It has nothing to do with the thoughts of another.  It has to do with modesty.

And as I said, a swim brief is just as modest as a typical woman’s one piece.