Hallway Mormons


ldsguy422
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I'm pretty sure every ward has a myriad of members that linger in the hall for the duration of Sunday School and Priesthood/Reliefy Society. It's not really my place to say anything, of course. So I don't. I'm not sure it's anybody's place, really. But it seems like such a waste to me. I mean, there are so FEW opportunities to be taught and instructed by the Spirit. I find it difficult to find personal time to just study the Gospel by myself. But I enjoy studying the Gospel, when I'm not involved with work, family, kids, dishes, etc. Why would you take a few casual conversations or aimlessly roam the internet over receiving eternal truths? I don't get it. Thoughts?

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8 minutes ago, ldsguy422 said:

I'm pretty sure every ward has a myriad of members that linger in the hall for the duration of Sunday School and Priesthood/Reliefy Society. It's not really my place to say anything, of course. So I don't. I'm not sure it's anybody's place, really. But it seems like such a waste to me. I mean, there are so FEW opportunities to be taught and instructed by the Spirit. I find it difficult to find personal time to just study the Gospel by myself. But I enjoy studying the Gospel, when I'm not involved with work, family, kids, dishes, etc. Why would you take a few casual conversations or aimlessly roam the internet over receiving eternal truths? I don't get it. Thoughts?

I was a hallway Mormon for awhile.  The Sunday School teacher was this old man who would just get up and drone on about how horrible life is, every single Sunday.  I found it very depressing and I certainly wasn't feeling the Spirit in that class, so I would sneak into my wife's primary class and listen to her lesson.  

And then there was the EQ teacher who would openly question Church leadership during his lessons . . . 

Maybe your ward's teachers are that bad . . . 

Edited by DoctorLemon
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There are a ton of reasons. 

Spiritual reasons: Some folks are struggling to be there.  Some folks don't want to be there at all, but show up for various reasons.  Or are apathetic.  Or feel like outcasts. Or, as you mention, are addicted to the internet and their devices.  

Health reasons: Some folks have colds and don't want anyone to catch it.  Or people have colds, and they don't want to catch it.  Some have mental health issues and don't do well in crowds or classrooms.  In my ward, there are two that have chemical sensitivities, and rarely even make it into the building.  They are as active and faithful as their health allows them to be.  

Practical reasons: Foyers are a blessing to folks with young kids learning to behave, or throwing fits. 

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When I was the SS president I asked that an instructor be called for a hall Sunday School class as well as a 3rd hour class.  Have this individual walk the halls, take roll and give short spiritual encouragements to those wandering the halls – perhaps even having an opening and closing prayer.  The bishop vetoed my suggestion.

 

The Traveler

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Guest MormonGator

Instead of asking why some people stay in the hallway, maybe we should do whatever we can to make people feel comfortable and want to attend classes. Don't get me wrong OP-it's not a personal slam against you, you sound like a really nice person to even notice those chilling in the hallway. 

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25 minutes ago, NeuroTypical said:

There are a ton of reasons. 

Spiritual reasons: Some folks are struggling to be there.  Some folks don't want to be there at all, but show up for various reasons.  Or are apathetic.  Or feel like outcasts. Or, as you mention, are addicted to the internet and their devices.  

Health reasons: Some folks have colds and don't want anyone to catch it.  Or people have colds, and they don't want to catch it.  Some have mental health issues and don't do well in crowds or classrooms.  In my ward, there are two that have chemical sensitivities, and rarely even make it into the building.  They are as active and faithful as their health allows them to be.  

Practical reasons: Foyers are a blessing to folks with young kids learning to behave, or throwing fits. 

 

When our family was young we tried taking our little kids to the foyer – we discovered it did not help them be reverent in Church nor did it contribute to our spirituality any more than staying at home.  Mrs. Traveler concluded that the teaching of children begins in the home.  So, she started training our children to be reverent at home.  She would sit in the formal living room with the children training them to be sit quietly with some church only books and toys.  While I served in bishoprics she was alone with the children (5) – on occasions I would take one of the old boys with me to sit on the stand.  It took a lot of practice at home but once Mrs. Traveler took the matter in hand we never had to take a child out.  Interestingly we often take grand children to church when they are left with us and we never have to take any of them out either.

What I learned from her efforts is that children that are taught to be reverent (not forced) enjoy church more than children in foyers.  At least that is the case in our family, friends and ward members I have observed

 

The Traveler

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37 minutes ago, ldsguy422 said:

I'm pretty sure every ward has a myriad of members that linger in the hall for the duration of Sunday School and Priesthood/Reliefy Society. It's not really my place to say anything, of course. So I don't. I'm not sure it's anybody's place, really. But it seems like such a waste to me. I mean, there are so FEW opportunities to be taught and instructed by the Spirit. I find it difficult to find personal time to just study the Gospel by myself. But I enjoy studying the Gospel, when I'm not involved with work, family, kids, dishes, etc. Why would you take a few casual conversations or aimlessly roam the internet over receiving eternal truths? I don't get it. Thoughts?

 

I have also observed that whenever a smaller number of LDS members are in a room that is large – there is always a cadre that insists on sitting in the back – even if they are asked to move closer so all that wish to speak can be heard.

 

The Traveler

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2 minutes ago, Traveler said:

 

I have also observed that whenever a smaller number of LDS members are in a room that is large – there is always a cadre that insists on sitting in the back – even if they are asked to move closer so all that wish to speak can be heard.

 

The Traveler

I have been the guy who sits in the back too.

The reason I usually do this is because it feels weird for me to sit in the front, almost like I am being watched by everyone.  Sitting in the back feels a lot more natural to me, at least.

I admit I really hate it when people tell everyone to move up and get close to each other.  I need my space!

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6 minutes ago, DoctorLemon said:

I have been the guy who sits in the back too.

The reason I usually do this is because it feels weird for me to sit in the front, almost like I am being watched by everyone.  Sitting in the back feels a lot more natural to me, at least.

I admit I really hate it when people tell everyone to move up and get close to each other.  I need my space!

Not to mention, when I am sitting in the back, it is a lot less noticeable when I fall asleep during boring lessons... like those taught by the second counselor of my former stake president.  I swear, that guy was boring.

Just being honest . . . :D

Edited by DoctorLemon
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1 minute ago, Traveler said:

so all that wish to speak can be heard

IMO, this is a crock.  I've never had a hard time hearing what's being said regardless of where I am (except when sitting next to a friend of mine - when she talks, you'd need an amplifier even if her vocal chords were in your ear).

IMO, if people want other people to bunch up, they should stop making excuses for it other than "I said so", because there are rarely valid logistical excuses for it.

Finally, the more experience one gets with people "on the fringe", the more one learns that there are very legitimate reasons for some people to need to be at the edge, not in the middle and especially not blocked in by other humans.

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Guest LiterateParakeet

There was a time when I was working through somethings that I found church very painful...to the point that I could be found in the bathroom crying every Sunday.  It's a wonder I kept going to church.  But I believed (and still do) that that is where the Lord wanted me to be.  So I perservered.  After talking to my Bishop about the situation, he gave me a calling in the library so I had some excuse not to be in class.  

You never know why people are in the hall, I think it's great that they are at church at all.  

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Guest LiterateParakeet
4 minutes ago, zil said:

IMO, this is a crock.  I've never had a hard time hearing what's being said regardless of where I am

But you don't speak for everyone.  I know several people that struggle to hear in the meetings.  My church building has "hearing aids" people can borrow to assist with this problem.  

 

Quote

Finally, the more experience one gets with people "on the fringe", the more one learns that there are very legitimate reasons for some people to need to be at the edge, not in the middle and especially not blocked in by other humans.

 I agree.  I'm still a little annoyed with my RSP for asking me three times to move to the front.  If I hadn't been with a sister who is only marginally active, I would have got up and walked right out the door.  Grrrr, I really hate to be micro-managed!

Edited by LiterateParakeet
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Just now, LiterateParakeet said:

But you don't speak for everyone.  I know several people that struggle to hear in the meetings.  My church building has "hearing aids" people can borrow to assist with this problem.  

And that's what the hearing aids are for.  I'm all for passing a mic around, using various forms of hearing aids, asking people to speak up.  But forcing people to pack in like sardines is going to drive some people away.  Some people need that extra bit of space, or their back to a wall in order to maintain a bit of sanity.

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Guest LiterateParakeet

@zil , okay we agree then.  I misunderstood you.   Sometimes church is still difficult for me....for example, I will probably do the hallway thing this Sunday during RS because if I sit in on the lesson I know will be given, I might "pay for it" for a week.  I don't have time for that sort of emotional set back.  

And if I want to sit in the back, for whatever reason, I should be allowed to do so for heaven's sake.  Better in that back row (or wherever) than the hallway.  

Edited by LiterateParakeet
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22 minutes ago, MormonGator said:

Instead of asking why some people stay in the hallway, maybe we should do whatever we can to make people feel comfortable and want to attend classes. Don't get me wrong OP-it's not a personal slam against you, you sound like a really nice person to even notice those chilling in the hallway. 

Any specific suggestions? I'm open for ideas on helping them feel more comfortable. It just seems odd that these are individuals that are comfortable enough to go to sacrament meeting... but not class. 

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Guest MormonGator
3 minutes ago, ldsguy422 said:

Any specific suggestions? I'm open for ideas on helping them feel more comfortable. It just seems odd that these are individuals that are comfortable enough to go to sacrament meeting... but not class. 

Sure! 

-Get to know the people in the hall. Don't ask why they are in the hall, just get to know them. How long have they been members? Are they new to the area? What are their jobs? Do they have big families? Do they like sports? Music? Invite them to dinner or something maybe. 

-Make the classes interesting. Sorry people, but sometimes classes are boring. Make them interactive. Use pop culture references. Smile. Call on people to answer questions, even the quiet ones so they feel like they have contributed. 

-Focus on the positives. No one wants to hear fire and brimstone every week. If you make people feel loved and appreciated you'll be amazed what they can do, and therefore they'll add more to the classes. 

Edited by MormonGator
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1 minute ago, ldsguy422 said:

Any specific suggestions? I'm open for ideas on helping them feel more comfortable. It just seems odd that these are individuals that are comfortable enough to go to sacrament meeting... but not class. 

You could take a cattle prod . . . and give any such stragglers a nice shock!  (just kidding)

Like most things in the gospel, you as a teacher just have to do your part to make lessons as welcoming as possible.  Prepare, involve the class, make it fun and spiritual, bring treats.  Then, let people have their agency.  If they don't want to come to class, that is them using their agency, and hey, at least they are in the Church!

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Guest LiterateParakeet
1 minute ago, ldsguy422 said:

Any specific suggestions? I'm open for ideas on helping them feel more comfortable. It just seems odd that these are individuals that are comfortable enough to go to sacrament meeting... but not class. 

Be friendly, maybe they are struggling and a little kindness would be welcome.

Why go to Sacrament and not the other meetings?  To be an example to my children for one . . .  Besides my Bishop and I had an arrangement.  He would let me know the Sacrament meeting topic in advance so I would know if I needed to be in the hallway for Sacrament also . . .  

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Also sometimes people are in the hallway only temporarily. I recently took a really stressful job that made my life really difficult. I spent one Sunday a few weeks ago in the hallway just chatting with my cousin (and EQP) about life. I like Sunday School and am usually there, but that Sunday I really needed that hallway time. Always remember "In the quiet heart is hidden sorrow that the eye can't see". Sometimes people just need a breather☺.

Edited by Midwest LDS
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20 minutes ago, ldsguy422 said:

Any specific suggestions? I'm open for ideas on helping them feel more comfortable. It just seems odd that these are individuals that are comfortable enough to go to sacrament meeting... but not class. 

I got one and only one suggestion if you see this as a problem (I don't).  Be a Hallway Mormon and get to know these people and see if you can find out why they're in the hallway.

I sometimes stay in the Hallway.  Usually, it's because I met some people that I haven't seen in a while and so we talk in the hallway to catch up and fellowship.  I find it more fulfilling to fellowship with Saints I haven't seen in a while than sit in Sunday School for a lesson that I can study on my own.  But that's just me.

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1 hour ago, ldsguy422 said:

It's not really my place to say anything, of course. So I don't... it seems like such a waste to me. I mean, there are so FEW opportunities to be taught and instructed by the Spirit. I find it difficult to find personal time to just study the Gospel by myself. But I enjoy studying the Gospel, when I'm not involved with work, family, kids, dishes, etc. Why would you take a few casual conversations or aimlessly roam the internet over receiving eternal truths? I don't get it. Thoughts?

Oh but you do xD haha

I’ll give a similar response to the discussion on homosexuals coming to church. I’m sure there are plenty of people who look at me and say “why does he waste time on videogames, doesn’t God teach us not to be idle?”, and in return I say “Why do you get road rage? Isn’t that against what God teaches about charity?”

But I do agree and similar thoughts go through my head. But they are at different points in their conversion.

Those that haven’t tasted the light don’t ever really want it until they act in faith and reach for it.

 

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4 minutes ago, Fether said:

Oh but you do xD haha

I’ll give a similar response to the discussion on homosexuals coming to church. I’m sure there are plenty of people who look at me and say “why does he waste time on videogames, doesn’t God teach us not to be idle?”, and in return I say “Why do you get road rage? Isn’t that against what God teaches about charity?”

But I do agree and similar thoughts go through my head. But they are at different points in their conversion.

Those that haven’t tasted the light don’t ever really want it until they act in faith and reach for it.

 

People who play video games are horrible Mormons and should be ashamed of themselves.  :D

(I am joking - I am probably one of the bigger gamers on this site)

Edited by DoctorLemon
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Guest MormonGator
5 minutes ago, DoctorLemon said:

People who play video games are horrible Mormons and should be ashamed of themselves.  :D

(I am joking - I am probably one of the bigger gamers on this site)

 You should not joke around about such a serious topic. I'm very disappointed in you. All gamers are eternally condemned, and that is not a point you can debate. 

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