Temple Marriage Then Civil Divorce, is Sex With Ex-wife a Sin?

[jdizzle]

I'm confused on this topic. I married my wife in the temple but then we divorced a number of years later. I believe we would still have our eternal marriage in place since the civil divorce is not a divorce of the eternal marriage. The divorce was not because of any adultery or anything like that, basically a lack of communication. If we were still attempting to revive the relationship after a divorce and have not been with anyone else, would sex with each other be a sin? I understand that it is okay for Catholics to have sex with their former spouses after a civil divorce as long as they haven't been with anyone else. How does this work for Mormons?

[Just_A_Guy]

Absolutely sinful.  

Your legal marriage ended with the divorce decree.  Your spiritually “lawful” marriage ended when you chose to dissolve your union and the Holy Spirit of Promise withdrew its seal.

Sex outside of a lifelong commitment to the sexual partner, as solemnized by civil and/or priesthood authority, is sinful.  Period.

[Vort]

39 minutes ago, jdizzle said:

I'm confused on this topic. I married my wife in the temple but then we divorced a number of years later. I believe we would still have our eternal marriage in place since the civil divorce is not a divorce of the eternal marriage. The divorce was not because of any adultery or anything like that, basically a lack of communication. If we were still attempting to revive the relationship after a divorce and have not been with anyone else, would sex with each other be a sin? I understand that it is okay for Catholics to have sex with their former spouses after a civil divorce as long as they haven't been with anyone else. How does this work for Mormons?

Catholics disbelieve in divorce, period. You literally cannot divorce in Catholicism. It's not recognized. If you divorce, the Catholic Church still considers you married, so they see relations between "divorced" people as marital sex. The only "out" in Catholicism is to have your marriage declared null and void -- called an "annulment" -- in which case you are considered never to have been married.

So there is no equivalency between Catholicism and the teachings of the LDS Church. Just_A_Guy has it exactly correct: If you have sex with a person you are not currently legally married to, you're fornicating. Even if you're sealed to her, and even if by some miracle that sealing would survive your deaths, you're still not married to her, so you're still fornicating.

[Jane_Doe]

55 minutes ago, jdizzle said:

 How does this work for Mormons?

The law of charity is only have sexual experiences with your married spouse (of the opposite gender).     You and this woman are NOT married (regardless of sealing cancelation), hence it would be HORRIBLY sinful to engage with her that way.

If you truly desire to be one with her again, then join her again in marriage and FULLY commit to each other.  Don't sell her or yourself short with anything else.  

 

Edited April 16, 2018 by Jane_Doe

[The Folk Prophet]

What an awesome question! Just for the sake of sheer question-ness in question-dom this question represents!

[Latter-Day Marriage]

On 4/16/2018 at 2:19 PM, jdizzle said:

I'm confused on this topic. I married my wife in the temple but then we divorced a number of years later. I believe we would still have our eternal marriage in place since the civil divorce is not a divorce of the eternal marriage. The divorce was not because of any adultery or anything like that, basically a lack of communication. If we were still attempting to revive the relationship after a divorce and have not been with anyone else, would sex with each other be a sin? I understand that it is okay for Catholics to have sex with their former spouses after a civil divorce as long as they haven't been with anyone else. How does this work for Mormons?

With the divorce you are no longer married for time (mortality) even if you are still technically sealed for eternity.  So yes, it is a sin, and unless the two of you work things out it won't matter one little bit that you are still sealed for eternity because that is still conditional on you both keeping your covenants and both wanting to be together and having the approval of the Holy Spirit of Promise.  If she doesn't want to be your wife now, she very likely isn't going to want that for eternity either.

If you both have feelings for each other, work out your difference, get married again then go for it.

[Midwest LDS]

As others have already posted, it would be a terrible sin. In fact, I would argue it would be worse than "regular" fornication, because you are trying to find some technicality too get around a commandment. God will not be mocked Brother. If you desire to rekindle a relationship with your ex wife, then court her, and get married. Although since you have already divorced once, it might be a good idea to try to work out some of your differences before you get married again.

[anatess2]

On 4/16/2018 at 2:19 PM, jdizzle said:

I'm confused on this topic. I married my wife in the temple but then we divorced a number of years later. I believe we would still have our eternal marriage in place since the civil divorce is not a divorce of the eternal marriage. The divorce was not because of any adultery or anything like that, basically a lack of communication. If we were still attempting to revive the relationship after a divorce and have not been with anyone else, would sex with each other be a sin? I understand that it is okay for Catholics to have sex with their former spouses after a civil divorce as long as they haven't been with anyone else. How does this work for Mormons?

This is a sin.  Even for Catholics.  In Catholicism, your civil divorce itself is the grave sin that dwarfs the sexual relations, even as the Catholic Church does not recognize your civil divorce as a valid annulment of your marital covenants.

Edited April 24, 2018 by anatess2

[Grunt]

On 4/16/2018 at 3:11 PM, Jane_Doe said:

The law of charity is only have sexual experiences with your married spouse (of the opposite gender).     You and this woman are NOT married (regardless of sealing cancelation), hence it would be HORRIBLY sinful to engage with her that way.

If you truly desire to be one with her again, then join her again in marriage and FULLY commit to each other.  Don't sell her or yourself short with anything else.  

 

What?  The missionaries never told me about the law of charity.

[zil]

18 minutes ago, Grunt said:

What?  The missionaries never told me about the law of charity.

In case this was serious, it was a type-o and meant to be chastity.

[Bad Karma]

OP, where did you go? 

 

 

[felicityswims]

On 4/16/2018 at 1:02 PM, Vort said:

Catholics disbelieve in divorce, period. You literally cannot divorce in Catholicism. It's not recognized. If you divorce, the Catholic Church still considers you married, so they see relations between "divorced" people as marital sex. The only "out" in Catholicism is to have your marriage declared null and void -- called an "annulment" -- in which case you are considered never to have been married.

 

Off topic, but because you're not considered married anymore, it also means that if you had any kids, they are considered illegitimate. Which seems off to me, it's not their fault that their parents divorced. 

Source: My parent was raised Catholic and had her first two children declared illegitimate when she had an annulment.