Guest Posted April 23, 2018 Report Share Posted April 23, 2018 I've made a huge mistake that I'm ashamed of. I had an affair with another man who claimed that he loved me! I'm so worried about what will happen to myu temple sealing, how my husband will react and the impact this will have on my kids. Any women here that have made this foolish mistake like me PLEASE give advice on how to fix this mess. Thank you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mdfxdb Posted April 23, 2018 Report Share Posted April 23, 2018 Go see your bishop. Come clean with your husband. Take the consequences like a grown up. You knew what you were getting into, now it's time to face the music. Likely outcomes are varied depending on both your level of repentance (as far as church discipline), divorce will be in play since you committed adultery. Your husband will have much to say on the matter. If divorce becomes a serious topic, then get an attorney and make sure you and your kids are taken care of. Don't discount your culpability... Vort 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted April 23, 2018 Report Share Posted April 23, 2018 If any other women have been in my shoes. Please PM me... I need someone to talk to Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MormonGator Posted April 23, 2018 Report Share Posted April 23, 2018 This is a scary time for you and I don't know what the future holds. Just remember that we all make mistakes, and the beauty of the atonement of Christ is that it covers all of them. Nothing you do can make Him stop loving you, and His forgiveness knows no limits. Praying for you, big time Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zil Posted April 23, 2018 Report Share Posted April 23, 2018 Please go see your bishop immediately. That is what will begin the process of "fixing this mess" - nothing else can. Your bishop has the keys to bring Christ and his atonement into the picture - that is what you need most. I know it sounds scary and embarrassing but that's Satan telling you to run and hide - reject Satan's idea. God wants you to come into the light. Only in the light can repentance and healing begin. The longer you delay, the harder it will be, and the more power Satan will have in the situation. Please, go and begin the repentance process. Vort, Sunday21 and Midwest LDS 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lost Boy Posted April 24, 2018 Report Share Posted April 24, 2018 1 hour ago, Becky said: I've made a huge mistake that I'm ashamed of. I had an affair with another man who claimed that he loved me! I'm so worried about what will happen to myu temple sealing, how my husband will react and the impact this will have on my kids. Any women here that have made this foolish mistake like me PLEASE give advice on how to fix this mess. Thank you My wife had an emotional affair with someone at work. Although not physical, it rocked me to my core. My wife would not have had the affair if we had a stronger relationship. I am guessing that you have not had the strongest relationship with your husband and you sound heartbroken over your lover. This is going to be very difficult for your husband. When I found out about my wife's affair, I was devastated. I couldn't eat, sleep, work for a couple of months. She wouldn't give me many details and I ended up going through her texts and chat logs to figure things out. I had a hard time trusting her. I still have a hard time. My kids are mostly grown and really didn't play into how I handled it. When she first told me, I remained emotionless and just asked questions. I then took it to the lord in prayer.. My answer was to forgive her and love her. It has been 3 months and things between us are better now than they have been for years. But are you sorry you did what you did? Or are you more sorry that it didn't work out? It sounds a bit like your husband is the consolation prize. If he feels like that, then things are going to be rough. No guy wants to be number two. But tell him you must. Be open and honest about it. If you don't, you are telling him that he is not that important to you. I hope that you can work things out. You have a tough road ahead. And you will need to work hard to show him he is number one. If you really want your marriage to succeed, you will need to do this and it will probably be the hardest thing you will ever do. He will probably reject your attempts and you will need to keep your emotions in check and show kindness in all that you do. I wish you the best. Be honest and open. He deserves it. There is hope, but a lot will depend on you. zil and seashmore 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sunday21 Posted April 24, 2018 Report Share Posted April 24, 2018 (edited) I am really sorry that you are going down this road! Eat the 🐸! Do the tough stuff that you need to do! Edited April 24, 2018 by Sunday21 lostinwater 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lostinwater Posted April 24, 2018 Report Share Posted April 24, 2018 2 hours ago, Becky said: I've made a huge mistake that I'm ashamed of. I had an affair with another man who claimed that he loved me! I'm so worried about what will happen to myu temple sealing, how my husband will react and the impact this will have on my kids. Any women here that have made this foolish mistake like me PLEASE give advice on how to fix this mess. Thank you So sorry. It takes a special kind of person to stop themselves as they tumble down a mountain and begin walking it back to the top. It's much easier to just keep falling - so props to you. My only advice would be to be honest and know that people need time to deal with shock and regain a sense of trust. Sometimes quite a lot of time. You'll probably hear them say things they don't really mean as they try to process what has happened. If you haven't watched the movie "Fireproof" - i'd recommend it. Please take care of yourself. Sunday21 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lost Boy Posted April 24, 2018 Report Share Posted April 24, 2018 2 hours ago, lostinwater said: So sorry. It takes a special kind of person to stop themselves as they tumble down a mountain and begin walking it back to the top. It's much easier to just keep falling - so props to you. My only advice would be to be honest and know that people need time to deal with shock and regain a sense of trust. Sometimes quite a lot of time. You'll probably hear them say things they don't really mean as they try to process what has happened. If you haven't watched the movie "Fireproof" - i'd recommend it. Please take care of yourself. That is a good movie, but it took me a lot longer than 40 days to get to a point where I could sleep at night. But like in the movie, you have to commit 100% and not give up when the going gets tough. My theme song is "I'm trying to be little Jesus ' showing kindness when you don't want to or think you can. It is what makes the miracles. If you haven't read the book 5 love languages, I highly recommend it. Hopefully you will be able to use it. lostinwater 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Latter-Day Marriage Posted April 24, 2018 Report Share Posted April 24, 2018 You really need to go see your Bishop as the others have said. You need to fully repent of your sin and get right with God. Your marriage may or may not survive this, I can't say, but I can say that you will be happier in the end being single and right with God than being married while living a lie. If you cover it up to save your marriage then it will all come out on judgement day and it will be too late to fix anything. On top of what you did will be all the years of dishonesty making it even worse. If you want a chance to save your marriage, you need to repent, and also apply the same steps of repentance to your relationship with your husband. I hope the information on my blog will help. Start at:http://latterday-marriage.blogspot.com/2017/09/healing-wounds-part-1-where-to-start.html seashmore and zil 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bad Karma Posted April 29, 2018 Report Share Posted April 29, 2018 On 4/23/2018 at 3:12 PM, Becky said: I've made a huge mistake that I'm ashamed of. I had an affair with another man who claimed that he loved me! I'm so worried about what will happen to myu temple sealing, how my husband will react and the impact this will have on my kids. Any women here that have made this foolish mistake like me PLEASE give advice on how to fix this mess. Thank you Heya OP, Are you still around on the forum? I'm anxious to know if you went and talked to your bishop and husband and how things are working out for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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