BeccaKirstyn

Family Ordinance Work Question

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I don't know the answer to this so I'm turning to the sage wisdom on this forum..

My grandmother (my mother's Mom) passed away October of last year (was not a member) and is legally divorced from her past husband (who is deceased and also not a member). We are looking to perform all her ordinance work once October comes around. Since there's no one to seal her to, is there any logistical way to seal her to our family? How does that all work for that ordinance? 

Haven't ever thought of a scenario like this one. Thanks in advance for any answers.

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4 hours ago, Maureen said:

I believe deceased couples who have been divorced can be sealed to each other.

M.

This is what I was told too when my mother passed and I asked a similar question about her sealing...and mine.   So I sealed my mom to my step-father even though they were divorced.  I don't know what that means for the next life, but I don't think that is something I need to worry about right now.  

So I think you, BeccaKirstyn, should seal your grandparents, and then have their children sealed to them.  

Edited by LiterateParakeet

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2 hours ago, LiterateParakeet said:

This is what I was told too when my mother passed and I asked a similar question about her sealing...and mine.   So I sealed my mom to my step-father even though they were divorced.  I don't know what that means for the next life, but I don't think that is something I need to worry about right now.  

So I think you, BeccaKirstyn, should seal your grandparents, and then have their children sealed to them.  

We are hesitant to do so as their divorce was for reasons of abuse, and would be something my grandmother would have highly disapproved of if discussed during her earthly life. 

Edited by BeccaKirstyn

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8 minutes ago, BeccaKirstyn said:

We are hesitant to do so as their divorce was for reasons of abuse, and would be something my grandmother would have highly disapproved of if discussed during her earthly life. 

OH I see.  Well, something I would consider is seal your grandmother to her parents.  Seal your mom to her grandparents as a child, then the whole family is still connected.   I don't know if that is "acceptable"  but it couldn't hurt to ask the people at the temple.   :)  

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2 hours ago, LiterateParakeet said:

OH I see.  Well, something I would consider is seal your grandmother to her parents.  Seal your mom to her grandparents as a child, then the whole family is still connected.   I don't know if that is "acceptable"  but it couldn't hurt to ask the people at the temple.   :)  

Thank you!

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3 hours ago, BeccaKirstyn said:

We are hesitant to do so as their divorce was for reasons of abuse, and would be something my grandmother would have highly disapproved of if discussed during her earthly life. 

There are no abusers in the Celestial Kingdom.

There are no abusive relationships in the Celestial Kingdom.  

And no one is the Celestial Kingdom is in a relationship they don't want to be.

The only people in the Celestial Kingdom are those whom are 100% like Christ Himself-- that same amount of mind-boggling love, selfishness, and devotion.  

 

 

I find that we often talk about how someone having a vicarious baptism done doesn't "automatically make that person Mormon".  In other words, that spirit still has the choice whether or not to accept Christ and honor that ordinance.   When a person truly accepts Christ, they are reborn in Him-- casting off the old sinful self and instead taking on His character.  As we see on Earth, this process doesn't literally happen overnight, but will indeed be completed by the time of exaltation.  Eternal sealings are a covenants to be kept by exalted people whom are a 100% reflection of Christ Himself.

Just like vicarious baptism gives a person a choice whether or not to accept the ordinance, it is the same with every other ordinance.  For example, every person has a choice whether or not to honor a sealing.  No one is in a relationship they don't want to be in.  

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3 hours ago, BeccaKirstyn said:

We are hesitant to do so as their divorce was for reasons of abuse, and would be something my grandmother would have highly disapproved of if discussed during her earthly life. 

I am pretty positive you would need to seal them together anyway. If he was abusive and she would want nothing to do with him, the sealing would have no effect on them. But this isn’t the only way for you to be connected to your mother. On paper and on paper only would they be sealed if gen was not and is not living worthy of the temple ordinances

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5 hours ago, Fether said:

I am pretty positive you would need to seal them together anyway. If he was abusive and she would want nothing to do with him, the sealing would have no effect on them. But this isn’t the only way for you to be connected to your mother. On paper and on paper only would they be sealed if gen was not and is not living worthy of the temple ordinances

Other things stand in the way besides her lack of desire to be sealed to him--we don't have permission to do his work. Just looking to see if there was anything we could do to seal my grandmother to us.

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5 minutes ago, BeccaKirstyn said:

Other things stand in the way besides her lack of desire to be sealed to him--we don't have permission to do his work. 

This is very odd.

The order of "permission givers" is spouse (both deceased in this case) and then children.  Did your mom and her siblings for some reason give permission for only one parent for some strange reason?

Or I suppose grandpa could have gotten re-married and his widow is still living and refuses permission?

 

 

In which case the thing to do is simply wait until there is permission for the sealing.  Yes, it sucks for us mortals, but everything is in the Lord's time.   

Edited by Jane_Doe

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11 minutes ago, Jane_Doe said:

This is very odd.

The order of "permission givers" is spouse (both deceased in this case) and then children.  Did you mom and her siblings for some reason give permission for only one parent for some strange reason?

 

He has children from multiple marriages and I believe my mother's step siblings would prefer to not have his work done. My mother is the only member.

Actually sorry I got the details wrong. Long story short, she remarried another man, then they got divorced. But then became close again years later up until her death--so most likely she would want to be sealed to him if given a choice. He is still living, so we would have to get permission later on after his death to do his work. Also not sure how that works with sealing my mother to them. 

But for now that answers my question--we'll probably have to wait a little bit to do her sealing ordinance to get that figured out. Thanks for everyone's help!

Edited by BeccaKirstyn

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13 minutes ago, BeccaKirstyn said:

He has children from multiple marriages and I believe my mother's step siblings would prefer to not have his work done. My mother is the only member.

Sorry---lots of details, wasn't trying to give their full life story on a forum. As an added detail just for clarity--my grandmother would most likely be sealed to the man she was "remarried" (it just wasn't legally done--I don't know why). He is still alive and also not a member.

Ok, those are relevant facts.

In which case, here's the procedure:

1) This October you do your grandma's individual ordinances (baptism through endowment).  

2) Then strive to remember that things are in the Lord's time for the sealing.  Eventually when there is permission given to do your grandpa's work, you do his individual ordinances, and then his sealing to grandma.  Remember-- that sealing is the *opportunity* for fully-repented grandma and grandpa to be together, and not you forcing anyone's repentance or being together.  

3) Then each of their children (your mom and any other siblings) are sealed to their parents.

Aside: If desired, it is probably possible your grandma sealed to her later common-law husband as well.  I don't remember the specific procedure for this, but it does exist.  Your mom is still sealed to her biological parents.

 

4) Remember, everything we do with proxy work now is a an approximation of things.  There will be a LOT to sort out come the Millennium with this all too.  We mortals aren't going to get everything perfect, and that's not expected.  And we simply don't know people's final hearts and a lot of other things we simply don't understand well at all.   I know that can drive us each crazy-- we want everything to fit in nice little boxes and be simple, but a lot of time things don't work that way.  Hence, trusting in God's wisdom and not our own.  

Edited by Jane_Doe

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