Invisibility-pranking children, the Hot New Thing


Vort
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Apparently, convincing children they're invisible is the greatest new prank. I saw my first video of it last night, and I admit I was (metaphorically) rolling on the floor. I had intended to create this thread with a mock provocative title, something like "Child abuse can be fun!", and linking to one of the videos.

But as often happens in such situations, somewhere between the time I got the idea and the time I created the thread, that analytic voice in my head that loves to suck the life out of silly fun things spoke up. It started asking annoying questions, such as:

  • "Does it really make sense to laugh at children's credulity? I mean, kids believe in Santa Claus because we tell them so. Do we mock them for that, or laugh at them for believing that some magical, obese philanthropist lives year-round at the north pole with a bunch of elves for slave labor?
  • "Children also believe us when we tell them about God. Same credulous spirit at work. How would we feel about people making fun of children for believing us when we teach them what we consider sacred doctrine?
  • "Some of these children were in serious emotional distress, like screaming and crying. Is it really acceptable to cause children such pain just so we can laugh at the fact that children are child-like?
  • "We are commanded to be child-like. Surely that means that we, like Thomas, should 'be not faithless, but believing'. Is it wise to use (or abuse) such a believing spirit to pull pranks?"

So my internal wet blanket asserts itself. I've come to think pretty much the opposite of what I thought last night. I don't think the prank is particularly funny, and I do think it's often taken to damaging extremes. I could see myself pulling such a prank on my own young children -- shame on me! -- but not to the point where they're really bewildered or panicking.

What does everyone else think?

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This is the difference between Fathers and Mothers.  And that's why a child needs both in their lives.  Fathers prank their children.  Mothers soothe their bewilderment.  Eventually, kids learn from their fathers not to take the natural world too seriously while they learn from their mothers that we are all fighting for survival where the prize for survival is death.

Cue the... "my father will never prank his children" responses...

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1 hour ago, Vort said:

Apparently, convincing children they're invisible is the greatest new prank. I saw my first video of it last night, and I admit I was (metaphorically) rolling on the floor. I had intended to create this thread with a mock provocative title, something like "Child abuse can be fun!", and linking to one of the videos.

But as often happens in such situations, somewhere between the time I got the idea and the time I created the thread, that analytic voice in my head that loves to suck the life out of silly fun things spoke up. It started asking annoying questions, such as:

  • "Does it really make sense to laugh at children's credulity? I mean, kids believe in Santa Claus because we tell them so. Do we mock them for that, or laugh at them for believing that some magical, obese philanthropist lives year-round at the north pole with a bunch of elves for slave labor?
  • "Children also believe us when we tell them about God. Same credulous spirit at work. How would we feel about people making fun of children for believing us when we teach them what we consider sacred doctrine?
  • "Some of these children were in serious emotional distress, like screaming and crying. Is it really acceptable to cause children such pain just so we can laugh at the fact that children are child-like?
  • "We are commanded to be child-like. Surely that means that we, like Thomas, should 'be not faithless, but believing'. Is it wise to use (or abuse) such a believing spirit to pull pranks?"

So my internal wet blanket asserts itself. I've come to think pretty much the opposite of what I thought last night. I don't think the prank is particularly funny, and I do think it's often taken to damaging extremes. I could see myself pulling such a prank on my own young children -- shame on me! -- but not to the point where they're really bewildered or panicking.

What does everyone else think?

I haven't fully explored the issue, but I'd say that most pranks, since their central principle is founded in deception, are a version of lying... Especially between a parent and a child, I think it betrays trust, which is so foundational to the parent-child relationship. In a prank like that, it's a version of cruelty, really, since the child completely and implicitly trusts their parent, and to take advantage of and violate that trust, especially for something so trivial (and possibly humiliating, since some parents seem to be almost mocking their kids)... to adults it seems like a minor joke and a quick laugh, but, trust me, that will have a lasting impact on those kids.

This may seem a bit extreme, but, to be honest, I don't think I'd even teach a kid to believe in Santa Claus (speaking as someone who was taught to believe in Santa, the Easter Bunny, etc. as a kid). I'd establish the tradition, and point out all Santa represents (and how he's based off of St. Nicholas, how he represents God giving us the great gift of His Son on Christmas, etc.), but I'd point out that Santa doesn't really exist as a guy who lives in the North Pole and comes down your chimney. Why? Because parents are the first people to introduce belief in God. That's going to be based on trust, on faith in (at that early age) the parent's word. Once kids find out parents sometimes lie about things that seem fantastical... well, then, might they be lying about God too? What happens when they're old enough that it's time to establish their own faith in God (which starts decently young)? At the very least, it'll be a temptation the devil can use and, even if it doesn't succeed in destroying their faith, it's best not to provide the opportunity. I do think it's important that kids learn faith and can exercise their imaginations, but I don't think a wrong (lying) makes a right... Kids need to be able to know they can trust their parents.

Anyway, that's my two cents. :)

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You should post the video so we can all laugh!!!


But haha seriously though... kids trust others and they are naïve, I don't think is funny to laugh at them for being innocents.

When my kids were little, of course grandparents and my ex would tell them about Santa... every time they would ask me if Santa was real I would tell them the truth, hahaha but because of the type of relationship I have with them, they would think I was just messing with them (I'm a fun/funny mom). My 11 yrs old doesn't believe in Santa anymore, the one that's 8 does believe. So sweet.

I think some thing are acceptable, some others can be mean or hurtful.

 

 

Edited by Chilean
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6 minutes ago, Vort said:

I didn't teach Santa Claus to my children. They seem no worse for having missed out.

@MaryJehanne, your kids were not taught about Saint Nicholas of Myra?  This was a yearly staple in our Catholic school.

I taught my kids all about Santa Claus.  Not just Saint Nicholas either... we went so far as having Elf on the Shelf on steroids.  They seem no worse for having that fun stuff... I mean, they know the Princesses in Disney are just costumed pretty girls.

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Kids can have an active imagination and even fantasies... That are out of touch with reality.  Such play can be normal and even healthy... as long as it is play.

Parents can and should play along to some degree.  (As determined based on needs and capacity of the individual parent and kid in question).

However there is a big difference between playing with your kid... and playing at your kids expense.  The video sounds like the latter.

 

 

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2 hours ago, estradling75 said:

Kids can have an active imagination and even fantasies... That are out of touch with reality.  Such play can be normal and even healthy... as long as it is play.

Parents can and should play along to some degree.  (As determined based on needs and capacity of the individual parent and kid in question).

 

 

So..  true story.  My dad lived in his brother’s house when he went to college.  They had an incident where their maid claimed to have a boyfriend named Benjamin who lived in the 3rd floor of the house...  well, it’s a 2-story house.

Fast forward 10 years and my dad is now married with 3 kids, the oldest is 5 years old.  My dad quit his job and we ended up staying back at his brother’s house.  The 5-year old started playing with his imaginary friend.  My mom was amused and played along until one day she told my dad about my brother’s imaginary friend named.... Benjamin.

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2 hours ago, anatess2 said:

@MaryJehanne, your kids were not taught about Saint Nicholas of Myra?  This was a yearly staple in our Catholic school.

I taught my kids all about Santa Claus.  Not just Saint Nicholas either... we went so far as having Elf on the Shelf on steroids.  They seem no worse for having that fun stuff... I mean, they know the Princesses in Disney are just costumed pretty girls.

Hi, Anatess! That quote was from Vort, not me! (Though maybe you were trying to ask both of us?) I never said I had kids. :)

Like I mentioned, I think it's great for kids to participate in the tradition of Santa Claus, and how he's based off of St. Nicholas (St. Nicholas doesn't equal Santa Claus; Santa's based off of him, but he's really become a figure of folklore... St. Nicholas never owned a workshop in the North Pole and flew around in a sled! :P). The problem isn't the character of Santa Claus, it's the step after that says he really truly flies around the world in a sled, has a workshop of elves, etc.

My parents started out with Santa and all that. It wasn't until part of the way through our childhood that they realized the problem... Then they began trying to emphasize, when we asked about Santa Claus, that Saint Nicholas was a real figure. They told me that if they'd had a do-over, they probably wouldn't have started it all in the first place.

 

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6 hours ago, Vort said:

So my internal wet blanket asserts itself. I've come to think pretty much the opposite of what I thought last night. I don't think the prank is particularly funny, and I do think it's often taken to damaging extremes. I could see myself pulling such a prank on my own young children -- shame on me! -- but not to the point where they're really bewildered or panicking.

What does everyone else think?

I have very similar thoughts as you. 

It is common place for innocent family and children movies about children to have an antagonist that is a very rude bully (‘Christmas for a dollar’ comes to mind) that at the end of such a movie we see the main character best the bully and the bully getting what he “deserves”. These plots bring a lot of sadness as I see the bully, having lost all he had and made a fool, walk away in anger or sadness. As the happy music is playing, my only thought is for the 8 year old antagonist who likely has an awful home life and is going home where he is likely to face a destructive home life.

The comic relief that everyone jokingly beats up on does that to me too.

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  • 2 weeks later...

I don't do Santa or the Easter Bunny or...

I tell my kids that I will never lie to them.  But I prank them all the time. I joke around all the time. 

This practice has helped them develop a sense of truth.  They recognize when something doesn't sound right. They look at me sideways when I'm pranking them or saying something sarcastically.

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Crap - I have had the impression ever since I was an adult that we are all being pranked by the children!  - like constantly - every day.  Has any one else been in the nursery at church and seen what kids can get adults to say and do?

 

The Traveler

Edited by Traveler
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On 9/11/2018 at 10:41 AM, Vort said:

Apparently, convincing children they're invisible is the greatest new prank. I saw my first video of it last night, and I admit I was (metaphorically) rolling on the floor. I had intended to create this thread with a mock provocative title, something like "Child abuse can be fun!", and linking to one of the videos.

But as often happens in such situations, somewhere between the time I got the idea and the time I created the thread, that analytic voice in my head that loves to suck the life out of silly fun things spoke up. It started asking annoying questions, such as:

  • "Does it really make sense to laugh at children's credulity? I mean, kids believe in Santa Claus because we tell them so. Do we mock them for that, or laugh at them for believing that some magical, obese philanthropist lives year-round at the north pole with a bunch of elves for slave labor?
  • "Children also believe us when we tell them about God. Same credulous spirit at work. How would we feel about people making fun of children for believing us when we teach them what we consider sacred doctrine?
  • "Some of these children were in serious emotional distress, like screaming and crying. Is it really acceptable to cause children such pain just so we can laugh at the fact that children are child-like?
  • "We are commanded to be child-like. Surely that means that we, like Thomas, should 'be not faithless, but believing'. Is it wise to use (or abuse) such a believing spirit to pull pranks?"

So my internal wet blanket asserts itself. I've come to think pretty much the opposite of what I thought last night. I don't think the prank is particularly funny, and I do think it's often taken to damaging extremes. I could see myself pulling such a prank on my own young children -- shame on me! -- but not to the point where they're really bewildered or panicking.

What does everyone else think?

Agreed...except I don't think it's funny in the first place. I remember Jimmy Kimmel asks parents to send in prank videos of things. One was to tell your kids you ate all their Halloween candy and then watch the kids cry. It's not funny watching spoiled kids scream bloody murder at their parents...and many of those kids were spoiled and probably deserved it on some level. Watching innocent children traumatized by way of getting made fun of isn't funny.

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On 9/11/2018 at 10:41 AM, Vort said:

What does everyone else think?

Parents should do right by their kids, and this kind of isn't right.  Sort of.  I mean, I guess a way to help kids be less gullible, is teach them that adults sometimes will try to take advantage of them for their own amusement.  One would think there are better ways to teach good lessons than this.  

Now, from a very early age, we played the "Daddy is full of crap game".  I was often sarcastic and would claim obviously false things were true, and vice versa.  The purpose was not to sucker or gotcha, the purpose was to tell me why I was full of crap.  To identify and hold to truth, no matter what anyone says.  It's something a kid can learn at a very early age - even pre-verbal.  (No, daddy isn't really coming to eat you, and since you know that, it's fun to pretend.)

As my daughters grow and start thriving despite my mistakes and shortcomings, I believe more and more that kids grow up in some ways because of their parents, in other ways in spite of their parents. 

Part of parenting is choosing what sort of relationship you want with your kids as they grow. 

Edited by NeuroTypical
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I haven't seen the video, but I used to play that my kids were invisible as well.  They never got mad at me.  They thought it was great fun.  Maybe I didn't do a convincing enough job.

But I think that as long as the child knows the parents love them and would not intentionally harm them, I don't see anything wrong with it and perhaps it helps them to understand that they need to think and reason.  That not all is as it appears.

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On 9/11/2018 at 1:43 PM, Vort said:

I didn't teach Santa Claus to my children. They seem no worse for having missed out.

My husband and I didn't encourage Santa-worship with our son. We always emphasized that his parents would supply his needs and wants, not some fairy.  That said, the grandparents and the rest of society did a pretty good job of convincing him that there was a Santa.

Regarding the 'parents ate the Halloween candy' type videos, I often wonder if parents who do this love their children. There's joking with kids and there's making kids suffer. Why would you do this? Some of these videos just makes my heart ache for these children - and I'm not all that sensitive, as some of you know. 😂 You're only a child once, you look to your parents for security and love... I don't know. Maybe it's the mom in me (tho I've seen mothers do some pretty awful things to their children in the name of being an internet sensation), but I wouldn't treat my son like that. My late husband was a guy's guy, a combat vet, yet I don't think he ever raised his voice to our son, much less spanked him - because we were happy to have our little fella and he was a joy to us.  Life is full of unhappiness that can't be avoided. Why would parents want to purposefully add one additional second of unhappiness to their child's life? 

Edited by dahlia
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