Daughter of God


walkbyfaith40
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Hello to all member The Church Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saint.  My trail last year has been tough for me. I have been remaining close to my Heavenly Father for all the answers. This summer I read my Book of Mormon in 48 days and DC and Pearl of Great Price in two weeks time. I would like to share with my trail. Please note I am not here bragging about it, being prideful or even thinking my trail is worse anyone else. I am trying to reach for an answer. Heavenly Father wants me to use all my resources and be knowledgeable. I felt that need to share my story. With someone besides my bishop and my family and ward. Here goes because my fear of being alone in 2007 I met a man online and I thought was he was my soulmate by 2009 he became very abusive with me mental, emotional, physical, he took me from society  and family, and he was very controlling of me and was never to make decision  on my own. I only thought the abuse would stop and would not go on forever and then in 2012, I decided because I was so in love with this person I would marry him. June 2012 he became my husband and member of the church. In public, he was a sweet guy around and everyone one thought was a great guy. The moment we got home with doors was close that when he goes back to himself and no knew what was going on behind closed doors and what going on in the home. We brought in this world little girl that saw things that she should not have saw at the age 16months old. My husband spanks my daughter 6months old. I kept telling myself things going to get better. In 2016 I got a job that loves very much taking care of people that mental and physical disability and I was work full time because I decide to work full time and my husband got very upset with me for my decision. He was only working part-time. I was pregnant with our son and working 42hoursweek and I was graveyard shift and coming taking care of my daughter too because my husband did not want to step up be a parent. Remind you the abuse kept going on. Then my son was born. When my son was month old I decided to go to the store with my daughter and when we come from the store my son was injured. I did not think anything of it and I did not think it was anything major . On Friday as I was trying to attend to his needs I accidental hit his head up against the door frame and change his diaper with one foot and hear a pop. My son seems like a normal baby boy. By Saturday my little boy's leg was swollen. I plead with my husband for us to take him and he would not allow me too. Then by Sunday, I went against he wishes. Then come found out my little boy had head fracture bleeding on the brain and left femur broken. My husband claim to me he just drops box of baby whips on the side of his head. Remind you I did a reenactment on my piece in what I thought to cause injury.  In 2017 DHS came in took both my children place them in foster care and I decide to divorce my husband with a lot of prayers. Heavenly Father lead me to file my divorces. In 2017 I have done at least five parent classes and angry management classes, 16 session therapy and DBT class and Anxious group. Then may of 2018 the state where I living at giving me two options plead guilty in 3degree assault and 3mistreatments and 48months of prison and no parental rights or go trail and fight I would have lost because the moment they would pull up the reenactment I would have been still serving 48months of prison and no parental rights. The last choice I had was 3mistreatments and 24months prison and 36months probation with parental rights. My attorney fight with the judge over half hour let him know I did not do this to my son and she has evidence and she got a report for the dr and the dr even said I did not this. The judge said she must make decisions today and I am sorry but she did this reenactment now she must choose one. I have chosen  3mistreatments 24 prisons and 36month with parental rights. When came to the sentencing day the judge only gave me jail time 180 days and I serve 110 and now I am home. I have C-felony for the first time in my life. My husband and I separated for last year now. I am homeless right now. I am still reminding close to Heavenly Father get through this trail. I am remaining close to my bishop to guide in the right direction. I am in need roommate and I am in need a job in Oregon and Marion County area. And now I have a probation officer that advocate for me as well. I am trying to remain strong. From the time I was 11years old I knew I want to be a mother. Most time read Job story over again because He lost everything and so did I. I lost my lost kids, job, freedom, identity, and my husband turn back on me. I have noticed my close get with Heavenly Father and Satan is pulling at my strings. I keep telling myself one day at the time. I know Heavenly Father has a plan for me. Please Keep me in your prayers. Thank you for taking out the time of reading this.

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I feel for you, but why was your ex husband not tried and put in jail for doing this to your son?  I think justice is called for, this was not fair to you, you were trying  in many ways, and I;m sure there were some hard decisions, but he is accountable for what he has done, as well.  I wish you the best, and that you can be reunited with your children.  The Lord will guide you.

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