The Wife Dilemma


HereAmISendMe
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20 hours ago, HereAmISendMe said:

So here's a question: my wife passed away a few months ago and I am engaged to a younger woman, with whom I am going to the Temple.  Here's the issue: when I do that, I will be sealed to two women.  I don't want to leave my first wife out in the cold, so to speak, nor do I wish to deny my fiancee an eternal marriage.

There is a hymn with the words - "Do what is right let the consequence follow".  If you do not know what is right - then (especially as far as eternity goes) it is not going to matter much what you do anyway.

 

The Traveler

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The question is: will getting sealed to my fiancee tear me apart from my first wife? 

Men have always (in the modern Church) been able to be sealed to more than one women.  This has always been Church policy/doctrine.   Before 1998, women could only be sealed to one man.  This was changed in 1998.

The above used to be pg. 72 of the Church Handbook of instructions, but I don't know what page it's on in the latest version.  

Edited by Scott
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In the Church Handbook of Instructions, in all these cases, we are informed that all things will be worked out by a perfect loving Father in Heaven. Your first wife specifically asked you to move on. As a man is able to be sealed to more than one woman, and if this is her desire to be sealed to you, I wouldn't withhold such from her -- assuming the Lord confirms to both of you that this is the correct path (and that you truly love her).

The other option for you is if you are concerned about your sealing to your first wife, then you can choose to marry someone only in this life, and thus only date women who are not looking to be sealed to their spouse.

Personally, option #1 is better -- a random guy's opinion on the internet.

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Um, why is it an issue? Men can be sealed to more than one woman if the first has passed away. How will you be leaving your first wife out in the cold. were you not sealed to her? If that is the case you can be sealed to your first wife in the temple also. 

The entire issue seems kind of silly when you think of it in an eternal perspective. 

Sorry if I am coming across insensitive but I am confuses by the initial question.

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On 10/13/2018 at 12:42 PM, HereAmISendMe said:

Fair enough.  I see that now.  The question is: will getting sealed to my fiancee tear me apart from my first wife?  She made me promise to move on after she passed, but we never discussed the whole two wives thing, i.e. how she'd feel about it?

Are you a recent convert?

I will assume yes given the question asked. You can be sealed to as many women as will marry you in life provided that you are worthy to do so.  None of your wives' will be "left out inthe cold". All will receive the promises and blessings associated with a temple marriage.

 

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54 minutes ago, omegaseamaster75 said:

You can be sealed to as many women as will marry you in life provided that you are worthy to do so.  None of your wives' will be "left out inthe cold". All will receive the promises and blessings associated with a temple marriage.

This is approximately correct, but open to misinterpretation.

To be clear: A Latter-day Saint man may be married (in the mortal, societal sense) to no more than one woman at a time. I am aware of no exceptions to this rule today. He may be sealed to multiple women at the same time, but in general he cannot be sealed to two living women at the same time. The only exception I am aware of occurs when the man is sealed to his wife, who then divorces him without breaking the sealing. The man may then, if he is worthy, marry and be sealed to another woman while his ex-wife is still alive and sealed to him.

I suppose this could potentially go on ad infinitum, meaning a man might potentially be sealed to any number of women while they are all still alive. But that's highly unlikely, because getting sealed after a divorce requires First Presidency approval. My guess is that the First Presidency would quickly stop approving sealings for a serial groom whose wives keep on leaving him.

A living man may be sealed to any number of deceased spouses. A deceased man may, when appropriate, be sealed to any number of women. There are guidelines for determining how we do sealings based on genealogical work and how to decide which men get sealed to which women.

Edited by Vort
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1 hour ago, Vort said:

This is approximately correct, but open to misinterpretation.

To be clear: A Latter-day Saint man may be married (in the mortal, societal sense) to no more than one woman at a time. I am aware of no exceptions to this rule today. He may be sealed to multiple women at the same time, but in general he cannot be sealed to two living women at the same time. The only exception I am aware of occurs when the man is sealed to his wife, who then divorces him without breaking the sealing. The man may then, if he is worthy, marry and be sealed to another woman while his ex-wife is still alive.

This is correct

1 hour ago, Vort said:

I suppose this could potentially go on ad infinitum, meaning a man might potentially be sealed to any finite number of women while they are all still alive. But that's highly unlikely, because getting sealed after a divorce requires First Presidency approval. My guess is that the First Presidency would quickly stop approving sealings for a serial groom whose wives keep on leaving him.

I'll let you know how it works out for me

1 hour ago, Vort said:

A living man may be sealed to any number of deceased spouses. A deceased man may, when appropriate, be sealed to any number of wives. There are rules for determining how we do sealings based on genealogical work and how to decide which men get sealed to which women.

This I did not know.

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