LumosLDS Posted June 25, 2019 Report Share Posted June 25, 2019 Alright, so, basically I need some advice. I'm staying in another country for 3 months, just got here a couple of weeks ago. (Originally from the US). I used to struggle with pornography a little bit and repented of it all a while ago. Earlier today, I had a relapse and looked at some. I have been 100% clean ever since I first confessed, well over a year ago. I want to confess and do so without delay! I was thinking I would just go to church in the country I'm in this Sunday (they have both branches and wards close to me, or at least that I can manage to get to). I was feeling so good and hopeful... But then realized that my records weren't moved over here... So does that mean I couldn't confess to a bishop here because I'm not under that "jurisdiction" or whatever word would go there? I want to repent as soon as possible and not have this hanging over me. There is also a temple here I wanted to go to and now I'm not sure if I should before confessing. But if I can't confess while I'm here what am I supposed to do? I'm only home for a short time when I return from this country before I go to one of the BYU schools, less than a week. I'm afraid of confessing right when I get there because I'm afraid of the academic consequences I would face, especially seeing as it would be my first semester there transferring in from another university. While I recognize fully the severity of this type of sin I don't want to be kicked out and don't think I should be since this was a slip-up for me and I'm trying to be better. I just want to confess and feel better and more fortified. I'm also afraid if I wait I'll lose the courage to do so. Can I confess to a bishop here in the country I'm in! Clearly, I'm freaking out and spiraling, please help. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jane_Doe Posted June 25, 2019 Report Share Posted June 25, 2019 First *take a deep breath* Second: just schedule an appointment with the local bishop. Think of it this way: if you were in a car wreck, would you hesitate going to the local bishop just because your records weren't there? No! Likewise don't hesitate when you're in a spiritual wreck to go see the local bishop. Third, welcome to the forums! LumosLDS 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anatess2 Posted June 25, 2019 Report Share Posted June 25, 2019 This is not quite the same situation but it might be relevant. I go to the Philippines a lot for months at a time. One time when I was there, the bishop gave me a calling as the sacrament meeting pianist. My records, of course, don't go to the Philippines with me but stays in my home ward in Florida, but the bishop still gave me the calling anyway. LumosLDS 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fether Posted June 25, 2019 Report Share Posted June 25, 2019 4 hours ago, LumosLDS said: Alright, so, basically I need some advice. I'm staying in another country for 3 months, just got here a couple of weeks ago. (Originally from the US). I used to struggle with pornography a little bit and repented of it all a while ago. Earlier today, I had a relapse and looked at some. I have been 100% clean ever since I first confessed, well over a year ago. I want to confess and do so without delay! I was thinking I would just go to church in the country I'm in this Sunday (they have both branches and wards close to me, or at least that I can manage to get to). I was feeling so good and hopeful... But then realized that my records weren't moved over here... So does that mean I couldn't confess to a bishop here because I'm not under that "jurisdiction" or whatever word would go there? I want to repent as soon as possible and not have this hanging over me. There is also a temple here I wanted to go to and now I'm not sure if I should before confessing. But if I can't confess while I'm here what am I supposed to do? I'm only home for a short time when I return from this country before I go to one of the BYU schools, less than a week. I'm afraid of confessing right when I get there because I'm afraid of the academic consequences I would face, especially seeing as it would be my first semester there transferring in from another university. While I recognize fully the severity of this type of sin I don't want to be kicked out and don't think I should be since this was a slip-up for me and I'm trying to be better. I just want to confess and feel better and more fortified. I'm also afraid if I wait I'll lose the courage to do so. Can I confess to a bishop here in the country I'm in! Clearly, I'm freaking out and spiraling, please help. Ehhh, no reason not to speak to this Bishop now and then later speak to your “real bishop” good luck 😊 I’m sure everything will be ok LumosLDS 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LumosLDS Posted June 25, 2019 Author Report Share Posted June 25, 2019 Thanks everyone for the replies! I'm not so concerned about my records necessarily, but if the bishop here would have the authority to help me out. I've been trying to figure it out or if the church has a stance/guidelines about this sort of situation but I'm not finding much. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
estradling75 Posted June 25, 2019 Report Share Posted June 25, 2019 41 minutes ago, Fether said: Ehhh, no reason not to speak to this Bishop now and then later speak to your “real bishop” good luck 😊 I’m sure everything will be ok In this day and age.... I don't see why one could not reach out to their "real bishop" and get help/advice/council... No matter how far away one might be geographically. dprh, Midwest LDS and Fether 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dprh Posted June 25, 2019 Report Share Posted June 25, 2019 I think visiting the local bishop is a great idea if you'll be there more than 3-4 weeks. He doesn't have your records, but he is the steward of everyone living in his boundaries, not just members of the church. While you are staying there, he is your shepherd. I also agree with @estradling75. Since you're on this forum, you have internet access, so you should be able to email your home ward bishop, or even call him. There are plenty of cheap or free ways to make international phone calls now. Glad to hear you made it a year with no slips and that you're working on cleaning up quickly. LumosLDS 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LumosLDS Posted June 26, 2019 Author Report Share Posted June 26, 2019 (edited) Thank you all. I am a member, if there was any confusion haha. I was feeling especially stressed because "now I'm a returned missionary so shouldn't I be better?" is where my mind was going. In my total freak out it truly did not occur to me that I could use technology to Skype or something with my Bishop back at home. I have a really strong testimony of Repentance so I feel ok, not ok about my sin, but ok in that I know what this process is like to a degree and that I can make things okay again. I'm going to think and pray on it, but I think I'd feel better about going to see a Bishop in person so for now I'm thinking I'll go with that unless I feel differently. Thanks to everyone for your kindness and this non-judgemental atmosphere, I wish everyone in the church would have this kind of experience (whether online or in their wards and families) when seeking help. Edited June 26, 2019 by LumosLDS Midwest LDS 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
omegaseamaster75 Posted June 26, 2019 Report Share Posted June 26, 2019 On 6/25/2019 at 6:43 AM, LumosLDS said: Alright, so, basically I need some advice. I'm staying in another country for 3 months, just got here a couple of weeks ago. (Originally from the US). I used to struggle with pornography a little bit and repented of it all a while ago. Earlier today, I had a relapse and looked at some. I have been 100% clean ever since I first confessed, well over a year ago. Clearly, I'm freaking out and spiraling, please help. Pump the brakes, One relapse since full repentance over a year ago? I'd put this on the home repentance plan and not get super wound up about it. You are now an adult, if you can identify what led to the relapse and ensure there are no further issues I would get on my knees ask for forgiveness and go about my business. However if you really feel like you need to confess in the flesh to a Bishop by all means please do so. unixknight, dprh and mnn2501 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LumosLDS Posted June 28, 2019 Author Report Share Posted June 28, 2019 On 6/26/2019 at 10:28 AM, omegaseamaster75 said: Pump the brakes, One relapse since full repentance over a year ago? I'd put this on the home repentance plan and not get super wound up about it. You are now an adult, if you can identify what led to the relapse and ensure there are no further issues I would get on my knees ask for forgiveness and go about my business. However if you really feel like you need to confess in the flesh to a Bishop by all means please do so. You think so? I just always assumed any type of pornography use needed to go through the bishop. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
estradling75 Posted June 28, 2019 Report Share Posted June 28, 2019 18 minutes ago, LumosLDS said: You think so? I just always assumed any type of pornography use needed to go through the bishop. That would be a good question to ask your Bishop. Unlike anyone here, your Bishop has the Keys and the Authority to make that call. Random posters on this (or any other forum) do not. Therefore anyone's opinion here should be viewed in that light. dprh 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
omegaseamaster75 Posted June 28, 2019 Report Share Posted June 28, 2019 1 hour ago, LumosLDS said: You think so? I just always assumed any type of pornography use needed to go through the bishop. I think so, but i'm just some random guy on the internet. You need to ask your Bishop this question as there is no one answer that applies to everyone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.