Too_picky Posted July 17, 2020 Report Share Posted July 17, 2020 Just to give a little background, we've been married less than five years and we both are not our first spouses. I feel that my husband and I are very compatible, we like the same things (for the most part). The thing I struggle with is that my husband is the epitome of my biggest pet peeve. I have always lived with the philosophy of the golden rule, treat others as you would like to be treated. My biggest pet peeve is when people don't follow that idea yet have certain expectations of others. For example, my husband asks for massages all the time (which I give), but gets bothered with me when I ask him for one. Questions bother him, but he can ask me 100 to my one. Probably the biggest challenge for me is that he will ask me all day to do things for him, like I'm his personal assistant, but I can't ask him for even one favor. Its always been like this with everything, our children, housework, even in our intimate life. I've tried to ignore it, but it builds up. I'm tired of it! I usually react poorly to these situations by snapping back, which causes huge arguments, or by staying away from him by giving him the silent treatment. I've talked to him about this but he always throws it back on me saying that it's my problem and not his, and claims I'm only being a jerk. We've tried going to counseling, but again, puts it on me saying that I'm not happy because of my depression, lack of self-esteem, and empty nest syndrome, which I do suffer from. I knew what I was getting into when I married him, he was annoying to me even when we were first getting to know each other, but I thought we might be able to get past it because we have so much in common. I've considered divorce, but because it wouldn't be my first one, I want to make it work. What can I do? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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