I don't think of myself as exactly envious, but whatever I am was taken down a notch


Backroads
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Old friend from way back in jr. High. Beautiful, slender, always looks great. Married young, very successful husband, big and beautiful home, bunch of kids, annual vacations.

Well, learned today she's battling cancer, has a special needs kid (not that this is a bad thing, but does add to her struggle of managing things), and her husband has left the church and is running anti these days.

 

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Random thought/comment.  I am glad I grew up kind of poor.  I am very appreciative of what I have and what I have accomplished for myself and my family in my life.  I went to the "rich" high school and saw most of classmates have everything.  I have run into some of those classmates over the years.  Some of them are still pompous ________.  smh.

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9 hours ago, Backroads said:

1. she's battling cancer,
2. and her husband has left the church and is running anti these days.

Not that it truly matters, just curiosity on my part... did she say which happened first? 

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I am a little older and have found things to be kind of different.

First off - I do not remember school as anything like what is depicted in entertainment.  Sure jr high and high school were quite awkward and I was pushed around a little and bullied - but mostly because I was instituting things.  I was in jr. high when I discovered that the smart kids were not really so smart - except they did their homework so they knew the answers.  So I decided to become one of the smart kids and almost everything changed.

In high school - I dated anyone I wanted -- went the the parties I wanted and was friends with who I wanted - almost everybody.  I was a small kid and did not do well in completive sports.  But the jocks and cheerleaders were still people - just generally not that interested in the chest club or the debate team - I honestly like everybody (except for what we called greasers).  I was not the ideal kid that was super nice to everybody.  Not that I would push anyone around - way to small for that - but I loved to prank my classmates and no one was exempt.   I was a little on the crazy stupid side - for example I tried to pull off taking two different girls to the same formal dance.  I honestly thought I could get away with it but of course I got caught.

All that was over 50 years ago and it is interesting how things and people have changed.  One of my high school buds (that I did not get along with all that much) was the class drunk, inactive in church (this is in Utah where church activity was socially important).  I found out later he went on a mission and that last time I saw him, he was a stake president.  One girl that I really liked in high school (dated a bunch) was popular, very active, strong testimony and her father was my stake president.  Years later we landed in the same ward and she was inactive and somewhat sower about church leadership and that women cannot hold the priesthood.   We remain friends but outside of church.

It is my opinion that the view of life as hard or a breeze is more a matter of individual insight than it is what happens to individuals.  But there are a few constants so I thought to list what I think are some constants:

1. People are more happy and successful that love working and are willing to be of service to others.  I have decided that those that make their bed every morning (starting the day with a simple 45 second accomplishment) are more happy and successful than those that will not take care of their space.

2. People that smile a lot have a much easier road through life than those that walk around with a frown and chip on their shoulder. 

3. People that talk about the success of others are much more happy than those that are in the know of and talk about everybody's problems.

4. Anyone can be unhappy (I think it is the default condition of life).  To be happy requires effort, practice and discipline. 

5. Life is a lot more fun when you are happy.  It is a drag when you are sad.

6. Money, especially lots of it, seems to be more of a problem and source of unhappiness than an engine of good relationships and happiness. 

 

I know we are suppose to love others, comfort those in need of comfort and so on.  I do not mind helping others- but to be honest I get a little tired of always helping the same people over and over that have difficulty helping anyone else and even themselves - especially if they have a hard time just saying thanks.

Everybody needs help sometimes - but people like me (and my late parents) are difficult because they (we) believe in helping others but will not allow anyone to help them (us).

One last thing - I have often thought I would take a picture.  There is in my neighborhood an old guy that can only get around in a power chair.  You can tell he struggles and just about everything is painful - and yet everyday he goes about the neighborhood cleaning up the parking strip along the street that is somewhat busy and all the houses are walled off from the street so all there is between private property is a side walk and a parking strip with grass and trees.  He has a bag on his power cart and rakes up stuff without getting out of his chair.  It is difficult but he does it.  He also loves to be thanked and talked to.  What a guy!!!

 

The Traveler

Edited by Traveler
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On 4/24/2021 at 11:36 AM, mirkwood said:

Random thought/comment.  I am glad I grew up kind of poor.  I am very appreciative of what I have and what I have accomplished for myself and my family in my life. 

People who have had lives of luxury and ease in my opinion have a harder time humbling themselves before the LORD.  But there are those that humble themselves in whatsoever circumstances they are in.  King Lamoni's Father was the example of such a man.  When he heard the call from God he turned and followed the LORD.

"Then said Jesus unto His disciples, 'Verily I say unto you, that a rich man shall hardly enter into the Kingdom of Heaven.'   -- Matthew 19:23

Those that trust in riches are proud in their hearts.

". . . Yea, all of you be subject one to another, and be clothed with humility; for “God resisteth the proud, and giveth grace to the humble.  Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time," -- I Peter 5:5-6

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12 minutes ago, Still_Small_Voice said:

...

"Then said Jesus unto His disciples, 'Verily I say unto you, that a rich man shall hardly enter into the Kingdom of Heaven.'   -- Matthew 19:23

...

I do not recall Jesus saying hardly any thing complementary about (or to) anyone that was rich, popular or powerful.  The closest was a rich young man that could not figure out what he lacked to be saved.

 

The Traveler

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11 hours ago, Traveler said:

I do not recall Jesus saying hardly any thing complementary about (or to) anyone that was rich, popular or powerful.  The closest was a rich young man that could not figure out what he lacked to be saved.

 

The Traveler

As a child, I remember hearing some story that I shall procede to retell here to the best of my ability. 

There was some holy man who spent his life in prayer and austeriy. He did have a job to help feed himself, but the extra payment that didn't pay the minimum requirements of his life were saved up. One day he realized he had quite the savings, but as he didn't need it, he decided to give it to the prince, who he thought was a good ruler and would use the gold the best way. The prince rewarded him back, and he didn't need the wealth, so he gave it to a princess to help her people. Anyway, this went back and forth and ended with a wedding, but it always made me think that wealth really needed.

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Quote

18 But before ye seek for riches, seek ye for the kingdom of God.

19 And after ye have obtained a hope in Christ ye shall obtain riches, if ye seek them; and ye will seek them for the intent to do good—to clothe the naked, and to feed the hungry, and to liberate the captive, and administer relief to the sick and the afflicted.

 -- Jacob 2:18-19

I'll repeat myself (from years ago).

  • Satan has his ways of giving riches to his minions.
  • The world has its way of rewarding with riches.
  • The Lord blesses with riches only for specific purposes and with specific conditions.

Consequences:

  • Satan's way is always going to be bad.
  • The world says that it doesn't matter if you "have" riches.  But it sure matters how you got it. (at least that's what it used to say).
  • The Lord says having riches always has its pitfalls.  Yes, it matters how you get it.  But what matters most is what you DO with it.

I've been dirt poor.  Today, I am what many would call rich. Are people jealous?  Maybe.  Do I have a curse?  Meh.  But here are some lessons I've learned about wealth and poverty.

1) Forrest Gump was right.  Not having to worry about money is just "one less thing" (to worry about).  You still have many other things to worry about.
2) To earn it honestly is a heck of a lot of hard work.
3) What you spend money on is pretty important.  I have seen the numerical patterns of my finances enough to note that as I make decisions to pay for good things that will improve my family's spiritual well being, I'm blessed to be able to afford it.  As I spend it on more selfish things, I find it difficult to make ends meet.
4) Merely having wealth is pretty much meaningless if you can't manage wealth.
5) Wealth is always relative.  While I'm wealthier than most of my family (the one I grew up with) and I've surpassed whatever my parents ever achieved financially, I still see people who have more than I do by significant margins, and I'll be honest -- I'm a bit jealous at times... or... well... coveting is a good word.  :D

Edited by Carborendum
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