Anyone remember RippleCutBuddha?


pam
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Anyone remember him? He was a very active member of the site for a long time and helped a lot with the Ask Gramps website for awhile.  I realized that I had not heard from him in quite some time and found out he passed away last year.  

I found his obituary.  Ryan Christopherson

https://capcity.news/latest-news/2022/04/19/obituaries-christopherson-jankovsky-mcgee-tolle-bean-pang/?fbclid=IwAR2pJ2iwvGWKiT8TIpzULhndjvhOCZCklVSEKcrZfnxpCto_LklCp2wggKs

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I don't know what the cause of death was but there is a post on his facebook page that says:

I knew Ryan since the 6th grade we was friends all three middle school an high school. We kinda went different paths after that but always remained friends. I guess he was dealing with much more then anyone knew, I wish he would have talked to me, and if you tried to Ryan an I failed yo hear, I’m truly sorry. I’m going to miss your comments an most of all I’ll miss you. Till we meet again may you finally Rest In Peace, love ya bro

 

I do know that he dealt with depression.  He had talked to me about it quite often.  

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He posted this on the day he passed:

I just don't know what else to do. I have gone to every source of help I could think of. All I got was a finger pointing somewhere else.
I got lots of encouragement from well wishers, and lectures from others.
I heard a lot of "what do you need?" Followed immediately by "We can't help with that." Or "There are lots of gov't programs you can look at."
All the gov't programs said was "you don't qualify."
The bank has spent nearly two months doing everything they could think of to not let Leigh have the last money her Grandmother wanted her to have. This after assuring us three times previous that they would fix it easily.
The state took Leigh to the hospital to get her into a better long term living arrangement than I could provide. Two and a half weeks later, they brought her back with promises of support care nurses that have failed to even contact us at all.
We have no money. We have no food. We will be evicted by Monday without that money.
When someone is suicidal, they need company. They need to know someone cares enough to get physically and immediately involved. Well wishes and lectures don't help at all.
I needed someone to come help me to shore, not shout directions and lectures for being in danger.
Maybe I waited too long in my shame of failure to ask for help.
My body is failing me. If I take my heart meds, I can't walk because of my bad knees and ankles. If I don't take them, I can't walk because of my heart. I'm almost out of them anyway, and with no job, insurance or money to get more, well, that's that.
I have no more fight left in me. I've failed everyone that ever knew me. That's on me.
I'm so very sorry for the pain I've caused.
Over the past everal months I just never really felt anyone was ever truly listening to me, but instead just talking with me so eventually I would shut up and go away.
So this is me, going away.
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Thanks for posting this info Pam.    

I'm a fan of appropriate tough love, sometimes shocking folks out of denial, advising ppl to put on their big person britches and buck it up and all that.  I routinely dish out such advice in social media with folks I don't know.

But when I hear folks talking suicide, I don't do any of that.  I just try my best to see them as a hurting person who needs to know they're loved, and I think real hard about the golden rule.  Let folks with stewardship do something different.  

 

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17 minutes ago, NeuroTypical said:

But when I hear folks talking suicide, I don't do any of that.  I just try my best to see them as a hurting person who needs to know they're loved, and I think real hard about the golden rule.  Let folks with stewardship do something different.  

Totally agree. Get the person immediate mental health first, then work on everything else. 

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