Order of importance?

[justdaniel]

I'm trying to find out what the order of importance is, between wife, God and children. Having read different things on different sites, I'm trying to narrow down what God's vision is. Thanks.

[NeuroTypical]

I'm trying to find out what the order of importance is, between wife, God and children.

Practical answer - your family comes before your calling.

Overly-idealistic answer that will get you in hot water with your wife - If everything runs right, God and family are the same order of importance. And if there's a conflict, somebody needs to change or improve.

(I started married life with the overly-idealistic answer. I'm currently living the practical answer. I hope someday to know the REAL answer. )

LM

[L_and_P21]

i want to say God then family. but when i think about it, the answer sticks out to be Family then God.

as for a spouse and children. i would say that you need to do everything to help your children but if you lack support, acknowledgment or love for your spouse you end up hurting your kids.

personally i think its a 3-way tie. all are dependent upon one another. think of it as a teepee. dont forget to add yourself in there. if you arent emotionally happy or well balanced you could throw off the balance of what should be and then crash to the ground.

[justdaniel]

Thanks guys.

[Scooter]

I remember having a problem with this topic while teaching someone on my mission. He had read an article from a Liahona or somewhere that had a statement about how family shouldn't be overshadowed by Church callings, and then he pointed out a verse about only serving God and having nothing else before Him.

Like LM said, the ideal would be to worship God together with your family. But you should try to have a good balance in life. Don't spend all day at work or working on some Church calling and neglect your family, and don't do the opposite and neglect your job.

Elder Oaks said this in General Conference (Oct. 07) "The First Presidency has called on parents 'to devote their best efforts to the teaching and rearing of their children in gospel principles. … The home is the basis of a righteous life, and no other instrumentality can take its place … in … this God-given responsibility.' The First Presidency has declared that 'however worthy and appropriate other demands or activities may be, they must not be permitted to displace the divinely-appointed duties that only parents and families can adequately perform.'

(“Good, Better, Best,” Ensign, Nov 2007, 104–8)

In a way, you can be serving God and honoring Him by doing your best with the responsibilities He has given you. But anytime family can lead you away from the Gospel, you should stand firm and be the anchor and the example for faithfulness.

[the_jason]

If everything runs right, God and family are the same order of importance. And if there's a conflict, somebody needs to change or improve.

Exactly. God is supreme, but he would never give a commandment that jeopardizes families, nor would he expect us to serve him at the expense of our family. Both should be equally important and should be given equal time.

[Iggy]

In a combined RS/PH meeting our Bishop told us that for a Husband his first and most important calling is that of Spouse/Father, for the wife hers is Spouse/Mother. Then those callings in Church come next.

There are also three personages in a marriage, the Husband & Wife (in no particular order) then Heavenly Father.

[a-train]

Alliegance to God is alliegance to family and fellow beings. When we are in the service of our fellow beings, we are only in the service of God. An eye single to His glory will never allow a man to do anything not in the best interests of family.

-a-train

[MissouriBoiler]

I think your presonal relationship with god is probably important, if not the first priority. The second or probably equal is your relationship with your spouse. Marriage to me has always been a covenant between Heavenly Father, My Wife and Myself. Need all 3 for it to work.

My children come next. My extended family and callings come after them.

My mission president told me something on my last day in the mission. He told me that my last 2 years had been pure service to the lord and that while I was here I learned that harmony with my companion and my relationship with the Lord was important to be successful. He also mentioned that he also always tells returning missionaries is that our calls are not to continue to serve the church 100% of the time. That it was now our charge to obtain a family and follow heavenly fathers work of raising a family. That we should never look back on our mission as the best service to Heavenly Father we have ever done for him but the raising of our family should be priority.

Always loved those simple pointers.

[Gwen]

though almost indistinguishable and equaly important; god, wife/husband, children (in that order with exception of obvious extream situations)

god does not mean chruch or callings; those are different, yes service to god but not how one truely puts him first. your faith, integrity, etc should always come first in everything you do. god must come first for that, if he is not then you will have different values for different ppl. won't work in the long haul. god is your core and foundation.

spouse next. doesn't matter how good a parent you are if you are constantly at odds with your spouse. the only exception to this is when a spouse is abusive or something, where the family in in direct danger. then you must protect your children first. works best when both parents are putting god first and eachother next, the kids will be fine if both are at least trying.

kids next.

i had a stake pres that would tell us all the time that we all juggle a lot of balls. different times in our lives those change, but we still have many (work, family, church, etc). all the balls we juggle are rubber but one, family is glass. drop family and it will shatter never to be gotten back, all the others bounce and will come back. when you are making choices you have to protect your family at all costs even if it means dropping every other ball in the air. let the others take care of themselves.

[Dr T]

God ought to be second to none (I'm still learning how to do this though)

God first.

[LdsNana]

The great account of Father Abraham is clear on this subject as far as God is concerned... Isaac.

We shall have NO other God before us. HE IS - I AM. Above ALL things - even our very own lives.

Consider also the First and Second Commandments which HE has given:

Thou Shalt love the Lord, thy God.

Thou Shalt love thy neighbor, as thy self.

It is on these Commandments - TWO only - do all the laws and the prophets HANG! This is the Doctrine of Christ.

Every prophecy and every ordinance that we receive, are predicated on this LOVE for God first - and 'how' we then 'LOVE' Him and DO His WILL - first and foremost above all else in our lives; which HE grants even that daily breath upon which we have our existence.

tDMg

LdsNana

[Dr T]

Good answer Nana :)

[JonboySquarepants]

it's amazing to see all these different answers. i think this should be the easiest question to answer and yet one of the most difficult to live. of course God would be number one and should be number one in everyone's life.

[ztodd]

First you need to separate your personal relationship with God from your religion. Then the order is-

1. God

2. Wife

3. Children

4. Religion

Generally I think this is the order but I agree with the others that sometimes the order changes temporarily.

[Elgama]

First you need to separate your personal relationship with God from your religion. Then the order is-

1. God

2. Wife

3. Children

4. Religion

Generally I think this is the order but I agree with the others that sometimes the order changes temporarily.

Our Personal relationship comes before all else and for me myself has to come before my children - if I remember to pray, meditate and shower before the kids get up then God gets a much better part of our day. Also surely for a Latter Day Saint God has called us to no greater calling than Spouse and Parent.

-Charley

[VisionOfLehi]

We show our love to Heavenly Father by being good husbands, wives, parents, and children. We do it by service to our family, as well as our brother's and sisters.

The importance is always Heavenly Father, in the highest.

Mark 12

28 ¶ And one of the scribes came, and having heard them reasoning together, and perceiving that he had answered them well, asked him, Which is the first commandment of all? 29 And Jesus answered him, The first of all the commandments is, Hear, O Israel; The Lord our God is one Lord:

30 And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength: this is the first commandment.

Yet this does not mean constantly on your knees or doing Church activities to the exclusion of all else. The Family: A Proclamation to the World points out what we should be doing, in regards to family.

As Latter-day Saints, we believe fairly strongly in what's taught in James 2. (Follow link for highlighted verses.)

Faith without works is dead.

Being a proper, loving, family member (whatever role that you may have in your family), is a sign of obedience and a work.

[VoluntaryPrison]

Elder Bednar did a question and answer session when he came to our Stake Conference and someone asked him this very question. Elder Bednar's response was essentially, "It depends." The gist of his comment was that there will be some days when your calling takes precedence, some days when your family takes precedence, and some days when your work might take precedence. There is no way you can keep them all in complete 100% balance all of the time. It's up to you to decide which one takes precedence at any given moment.