Priesthood Complacentcy

[Guest bmwhutto]

I am an Elders Quorum President in the south. In the past 4 years in my calling I have seen a decline in the priesthood. More and more of the priesthood seem to be complacent in their calling as father, husband and holder of the priesthood of god. It almost seems as a majority that no one cares about the gospel and what the gospel means to them and their families. Now don't get me wrong, there are those faithful men that go well above and beond the call of duty. I have tried being nice, loving and downright rude trying to reach the members of my quorum. My counselors and I have prayed long and hard to receive the lord's consel, when we do receive the revelation that we need, we go and execute the things that are required. But to no avail nothing changes. Any suggestions or comments would be nice.

[skalenfehl]

I've been in your shoes (well in the presidency). The best you can do is your best and to set the example. My recommendation is to strengthen the strongest of your quorum until they are strong enough to strengthen others. I believe Christ told his apostles when they were converted to strengthen their brethren. Through your example and the example of those who catch the spirit, the momentum will begin to grow. The best way to strengthen those that need it is through the longsuffereing principle of service. Visit your elders and tend to their needs. When their cups are filled they will be strong enough to fill the cups of others.

My two cents.

[MorningStar]

Maybe have a special meeting to emphasize these things? Our bishop recently chewed out the men because many of them will not watch their kids during Enrichment, yet they show up after Enrichment to play basketball. He said, "It's always the same people. I see your wives bringing your kids with them to Enrichment, you never volunteer to do the nursery, and then you're playing basketball afterwards. Enrichment is mandatory." I'm glad he takes it so seriously. Enrichment is the only break some women get in our ward.

My friends husband made a stink just when she wanted to go to the grocery store for an hour and leave their baby there. He complained and she pushed the issue, then when she got home, he had done nothing, so the baby was screaming. I told her, "He did that so you would take the baby with you next time. He knows that if the baby is miserable, you wouldn't dare leave him home with him. Tell him if he does it again, you will leave for twice as long." She actually told him that and he sheepishly grinned and acknowledged that's exactly what he was doing. Oh my gosh! I can't stand it when men won't watch their own children! He did start watching him though and stopped doing such a terrible job. Sad that she had to resort to that.

[Jbs2763]

what about "pretending" for 10 minutes we dont smell the poopy diaper?

kidding by the way

[MorningStar]

You mean the poopy diaper that smells so bad, it's making you gag? No one can pretend that well!

[Elgama]

Have a thank the Sisters dinner - get the Youth to organise a creche, and each Priesthood holder has to wait on his wife, be attentive, make her place setting, provide a flower etc, and a letter of a appreciation. Precede or Follow it with a fireside on how the priesthood should behave towards their family.

-Charley

[sixpacktr]

Have a thank the Sisters dinner - get the Youth to organise a creche, and each Priesthood holder has to wait on his wife, be attentive, make her place setting, provide a flower etc, and a letter of a appreciation. Precede or Follow it with a fireside on how the priesthood should behave towards their family.

-Charley

all great ideas, but if these clods haven't figured it out yet then they won't. Every General Conference PH meeting, EVERY ONE, has a talk to the brethren about being kind and attentive husbands. EVERY ONE. I get tired of hearing them, but realize that the prophets/apostles only preach that which the Lord wants us to hear, and after reading some of these examples I now understand why.

Poop never killed anyone, watching the kids you helped make never killed anyone. I had a blast with my girls when they where little when my wife was away. I always made the food that was really, really bad for you that mom would never make. My kids still talk about that. If you are on this board and think that raising the kids is your wife's responsibility and not yours, and that when you come home from a long hard day at work and want to go out with the boys and play ball, etc., then you need to repent. Your wife has had just as hard if not harder of a day, and needs some of you to offset the chatter of little ones. And your kids need you to be there too. I'm not saying never do anything with anyone else, but I too have witnessed people that just really didn't give a tinker's damn about their kids.

They miss out on so much.

As for the OP, that is the life of an EQP. Been there 3 different times. I worked my tail off and tried to lead by example. But the sad fact is that the church is ruled by the 30% rule: 30% activity, 30% tithing, 30% temple recommend holders, 30% HT. There are pockets of areas that do better on some or all, but for the most part, this is what we have. As a leader you do your best, so that, like Jacob, God won't hold your responsible for the sins of others, and go forward in faith. I'm believe more along the JS line of thinking: teach them correct principles, and let them govern themselves. It isn't you, or the Lord, being evaluated here. It is their willingness to obey the counsel of their leaders and the commandments of the Lord.

[Elgama]

all great ideas, but if these clods haven't figured it out yet then they won't. Every General Conference PH meeting, EVERY ONE, has a talk to the brethren about being kind and attentive husbands. EVERY ONE. I get tired of hearing them, but realize that the prophets/apostles only preach that which the Lord wants us to hear, and after reading some of these examples I now understand why.

Poop never killed anyone, watching the kids you helped make never killed anyone. I had a blast with my girls when they where little when my wife was away. I always made the food that was really, really bad for you that mom would never make. My kids still talk about that. If you are on this board and think that raising the kids is your wife's responsibility and not yours, and that when you come home from a long hard day at work and want to go out with the boys and play ball, etc., then you need to repent. Your wife has had just as hard if not harder of a day, and needs some of you to offset the chatter of little ones. And your kids need you to be there too. I'm not saying never do anything with anyone else, but I too have witnessed people that just really didn't give a tinker's damn about their kids.

They miss out on so much.

As for the OP, that is the life of an EQP. Been there 3 different times. I worked my tail off and tried to lead by example. But the sad fact is that the church is ruled by the 30% rule: 30% activity, 30% tithing, 30% temple recommend holders, 30% HT. There are pockets of areas that do better on some or all, but for the most part, this is what we have. As a leader you do your best, so that, like Jacob, God won't hold your responsible for the sins of others, and go forward in faith. I'm believe more along the JS line of thinking: teach them correct principles, and let them govern themselves. It isn't you, or the Lord, being evaluated here. It is their willingness to obey the counsel of their leaders and the commandments of the Lord.

Yeah but at least their wives might get a night off lol

-Charley

[WillowTheWhisp]

You mean the poopy diaper that smells so bad, it's making you gag? No one can pretend that well!

They can pretend they don't smell the kittylitter! They can also fail to hear a noise in the night which is deafening the rest of us.

[Elgama]

what about "pretending" for 10 minutes we dont smell the poopy diaper?

LOL I am doing this right now - usually my son will go and sit on Daddy's knee if he is stinky

-Charley

[Iggy]

what about "pretending" for 10 minutes we don't smell the poopy diaper? kidding by the way

I feel really sorry for the poor child with the stinky diaper- Daddy, that is pure abuse to allow that little one to wallow around in a poopy diaper when you are more than capable of changing it.

Perhaps those Dead-Beat Dads should be treated the same way they treat their wives and children, like they don't exist.

I am so very thankful my father was as active in our upbringing as my Mom. He taught me how to change my baby brothers diapers,(cloth diapers that had to be cleaned in the toilet first, then put in the diaper pail) along with how to sew, knit, darn, cook, and wash clothes, dishes, cars, walls, floors and animals. He also taught me how to change the oil in the car, empty the radiator, put snow chains on and change a flat.

He also sat out in the yard and made mud pies and "adobe bricks" with us. Mom laughed so hard she fell down the porch steps when she saw how filthy we all were.

A few months before my Dad died, he told me that he really regretted having to work nights for most of my life. I couldn't believe my ears. Why would he regret that? I was asleep while he was at work. Dad was home during my waking hours, and he played with all of us kids. He taught us, he disciplined us. He wiped our tears away, he laughed at our childish jokes. I told him all this, and then I held him in my arms and said that I had been the most envied girl at school, all my school-mates wanted to come home with me, because my Daddy played with me. Their Daddies shoved them aside and made a bee-line for the "Den" and the pitcher of martini's, or the bottle of Scotch.

These school-mates never ate dinner at the same table as their parents. Good grief, how else were you going to learn table manners and learn what was going on in your siblings school life and with your parents if you didn't eat at the same table at the same time??

Daddies, you better step up to the plate and get involved in your children's lives. Bathe them, hold them, talk to them and with them. Play mud pies and make "adobe bricks" with them. Get filthy with them, and in general show them how to enjoy the simple things. Get to know your little ones before they grow up and grow away from you.

[MorningStar]

My dad was very uninvolved with us kids and now he is scratching his head about why we aren't close. Hmmmm .....

[cgrantreed]

BMW... This is going to offend some when I say it and its not because its rude or incorrect but that its hitting so close to home. As a brotherhood we are getting more and more inept. We are taught the true power and meaning of what our Priesthood stands for and yet we take it so lightly. If we really understood the importance of what it was that we had and ACTED on it... there would be 100% HT, no one would go without getting their needs met by the quorum (activities, service projects, etc) and our EQ meetings would have lively helping discussions in them instead of dead, answer less, snore... meetings. The doctrine would be taught AND followed. It would almost make the EQ meeting unnecessary as we would all be doing it and talking about it would be just to burn time. Brothers would not be afraid to ask the others how to deal with a problem that they are having or how to overcome a situation like addiction or marital struggles. There would be no fear because the application of the Priesthood principles would negate any judgment and only provide empathy and a will to serve each other.

There is nothing that you can do to activate those who are fine with stagnation. I went through a period of that... well many years actually. i held the Priesthood and I did not magnify it. I held it and I used it when necessary but not as it should have been used. I have since learned the true meaning of it. I am ashamed that I ever took it lightly and I will never again do so. I lost so many opportunities to do it right and I will forever kick myself for it. How do you get people to feel that ashamed to stop them from being complacent? Without being rude and in their face? Good question. Sometimes it just takes a good swift kick in the pants. Guilt was a pretty powerful tool for me...

This is why I say that anyone that actually asks for the EQP or Bishop position is a fool. It takes brassy's to get anyone off their duff to get it done in the quorum. You have to make them feel the Spirit in a deep way that they can never deny again.

[Misshalfway]

I am an Elders Quorum President in the south. In the past 4 years in my calling I have seen a decline in the priesthood. More and more of the priesthood seem to be complacent in their calling as father, husband and holder of the priesthood of god. It almost seems as a majority that no one cares about the gospel and what the gospel means to them and their families. Now don't get me wrong, there are those faithful men that go well above and beond the call of duty. I have tried being nice, loving and downright rude trying to reach the members of my quorum. My counselors and I have prayed long and hard to receive the lord's consel, when we do receive the revelation that we need, we go and execute the things that are required. But to no avail nothing changes. Any suggestions or comments would be nice.

Is this a long term trend?

Do you guys still do PPI's or visits to each member of the quorum? Perhaps they need some one on one spiritual message to help reignite their testimony. Or perhaps need some personal needs met?

Keep praying!! Keep fasting!! Keep positive!! And keep inviting!! I think the more you create spiritual experiences and the more you tell the rest about them, perhaps could help to salt the oats!