Managing Tough Gospel Questions

Hey guys! So as you may imagine in my line of work I sometimes come in contact with people who have left The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. While people leave for all sorts of different reasons, I think most of the time it ultimately comes down to these two words: Unmet expectations. What they were expecting to find in the Church simply isn’t what they found. In this episode, I want to talk about a framework originally outlined by Bruce and Marie Hafen that can help us formulate realistic expectations, and can help us approach tough questions in a productive way. Let’s do it.

Alright, so within this framework, there are 3 stages or phases. They are Simplicity, Complexity, and Simplicity beyond Complexity. Stage One is the idealistic butterflies and rainbows stage. The Church is great, your ward is great, life is great. Everything is awesome. The Hafen’s bluntly describe stage One as “innocent and untested.”

Stage Two is complexity. If you think Stage One is all there is, running into Stage Two can be really painful. Maybe you discover information from hostile or friendly sources that doesn’t quite square with the idealistic view of the Church you had before. Maybe a Church leader says or does something you disagree with. Maybe there’s a past or present Church policy that doesn’t make sense to you. You notice that there’s a bit of a gap between the ideal and the real.

To read more: Faith&Beliefs