I would just like to start by saying this topic is not for the squeamish. It’s nothing dirty or vulgar it has to do with my job as a firefighter and a little girl. If your stomach can’t handle it there is no shame in knowing your limits and turning back to the main board.
In the past 3 months I have had to do CPR and use a defibrillator like 6 times. Each time the patient died. I will explain the last call chronologically to spare you the trouble of having to put the story together.
On a Friday afternoon a little girl decided to have a sleep over at her house for her birthday. She was turning seven. I would imagine when the sugar crash hit they decided to go to bed some time around 9:00pm.
At 11:30pm this little girl got out of bed and went to the kitchen for a drink. To get to the kitchen she walked all the way down the hall where the bedrooms are through the entryway / living room and collapsed.
At around 1:58am, Saturday morning one of the party guests went to look for the birthday girl and found her. She told the mommy and daddy that live there and they called 911 after going to investigate.
I arrived on scene around 2:06am with a firefighter who is also a paramedic. (If you are wondering why the fire department was dispatched is because most of my county is made up of volunteer ambulance squads that may take up to 30 minutes to respond based on availability of manpower. So when there is an advanced life support issues all the kings horses and all the kings men are sent.)
We followed the Sheriff’s deputy in he went for the parents we went for the child.
To spare you the details she now lives with G-d.
Eventually several members of my department made it to the scene, they are all depressed over the issue.
Here is my dilemma it bothers me that it doesn’t bother me. When I am in situations like that I just do what I got to do. It almost feels like I am in a TV show and every thing will be fine again in 30 minutes.
Is this disassociation ok? Should I feel more then I do?
LT
