sherman79

I think this topic has strayed a little from it's intent. I think that getting bent out of shape over a post that was posted without the content or intent of this particular thread is just going to lead to contention so I propose we just get on with posting cuz I would really hate to see this thread locked by a moderator cuz we all started fighting over someone elses personal discoveries. I really appreciate the learning and opinions of most of the posters on here they have helped me to see that this is not something that I am dealing with on my own. I also appreciate that most everyone on here has been so unconditionally non-judgmental. I am glad that so far we have been able to share our experiences and, through love, learn from each other.

Cynthia_Ann- oh that is too true. I always live in hope though that someday he will find his own salvation. I no longer feel guilty when he makes bad choices no matter what excuse he uses it is not my fault. He isn't a bad man though just extremely lost.

I am currently seperated and not completely willingly. I want my marriage to work and I have done everything to make it work but my husband doesn't want to be married anymore so that he can be the way he was before his mission. So I am getting divorced because when we were dating and engaged I didn't pay attention to the fact that he was still skirting the edges of promiscuity and other vices. I loved him and I was sure that when we were married he would leave those things behind. I told myself that it was because we weren't married yet so that it wasn't really unfaithfulness he was just being a guy. I am now hoping to just salvage what I do have from this marriage which are my 5 beautiful, smart and talented children. That I can raise them in a faithful home and hopefully teach them to be smarter in choosing their partners than I was. I still love my husband. So for me this hurts more than anything else ever has. I hope that this is the type of post that will help someone who is dating or engaged and seeing the red flags but ignoring them because of the excitement of loving and being loved. If he really loves you he doesn't see other women or tell you about them either. He doesn't look at them and comment about how hot they are. He doesn't sneak around with his non lds friends and drink and womanize and then lie to you about it even though you already know cuz his younger sibling told you. He just doesn't do that if he really loves you. And if he tells you he is picking you over the non lds girlfriend he had before his mission because you are his salvation turn around and run away as quickly as possible. Only he can be his salvation you are only in charge of yours. Never be a man's second choice. Those were the warning signs that I ignored. doesn't matter that he was the one in the wrong I still saw it and I still married him.