My girlfriend and I have been dating for nearly a year now, and we feel like we're ready to get married in just a short manner of months. But something has been troubling me for the past little while. At the beginning of our relationship and for nearly 6 months following, we did a very good job of keeping the law of chastity. We wouldn't even make out. At the beginning, we both expressed to each other how we have incredibly overpowering libidos because we wanted to be able to enter the temple worthily. The fact that we were able to overcome these enormous sexual urges while we were together was very commendable. Throughout our relationship we've kept in steady contact with the bishop, and he feels like we're ready to get married as well.
The problem is that around the Christmas season, we started making out. We were foolish, and believed that we weren't doing anything wrong. Y'all can say what you want about how making out isn't so bad, but as I mentioned earlier, we are both aware that we are more sexually charged than most people. That's part of the reason we want to be together. Neither of us wants to be married to someone who doesn't at least try to satisfy that huge current of sexual energy we both possess (I'm not suggesting that that's the only reason we want to get married). Making out arouses us more than it does other people. For us, making out = bad.
Anyways, a couple of times while we were engaged in this (at the time, seemingly non-dangerous) activity, I came to orgasm. It takes nearly no effort for me to reach this state, and has been an overwhelming struggle for me since i went through puberty. I used to be addicted to masturbation, and often, I would do it 5 to 6 times a day. It was incredibly difficult to overcome this, because, unlike other guys, it doesn't take much more than a touch for me to get that far. And apparently if I'm kissing too passionately, it's easy to get that far as well.
I believe making out arouses her as much as it arouses me. To protect her anonymity, as well as to protect her from embarrassment, I'm not going to describe how I know this. But we've made the decision to abstain from making out, keeping our kisses small, short, and sincere rather than long and drawn out. And we've been doing very well with that for the past couple months.
I know that what we did was wrong, and I've confessed to my Heavenly Father that I feel remorse for what we did. We've stopped doing it, and are doing well at keeping ourselves morally clean. But is this an issue that needs to be discussed with the bishop? I've never touched the private, sacred places of her body on top of clothes or underneath because I want to respect her. I'm trying to be chaste, but I wonder if this is an issue that, if not cleared up with a bishop, will keep me from entering the temple.
I'm not yet endowed. But I do feel bad that I allowed us to get carried away with this. Though both of us are so easily aroused, neither of us consider that an excuse to behave irresponsibly. We're both very critical of ourselves. Personally, sometimes my friends say I'm too critical. I just want to do what's right.
Complicated issue. Someone please help me?
