stephanie91

Here's my situation... My fiancé converted to LDS in his 20's, but left the church at the request of his ex-wife (she wouldn't even consider visiting). He would like to become active again. I was raised Methodist, but haven't attended church in a while. I guess you could say my religion has been something just between me and God -- I miss being involved in a church community, but the main thing that drove me away was that so many people were judgmental about anyone different from them. My fiancé and I are planning to visit our local ward , but aall of the reading I've done online (on both pro and anti-mormon sites), I've got a big question that concerns me on two levels. I'm in my early 40s and have never been married, no kids. While I love my soon-to-be stepdaughter, who spends every other weekend with us, we do not plan to have children of our own. The LDS seems very family-centric, and as children aren't really a part of our daily lives, I'm wondering if there is a comfortable place for me within the church? At the personal level, I wonder if I will "fit in," especially with women in the church. Are the lessons an activities for women (relief society, etc) geared mostly around children and families? Am I going to feel like the odd person out at every event? I posed a similar question to the chat representative on Mormon.org a few days ago, and her answer bothered me a lot -- she said that she knew women in their 40s in the church who "weren't even married,", but that they were spiritually fulfilled because the Heavenly Father loves them and they were happy even though they "aren't like other people." Yikes! way to make me afraid I'll be seen as a weirdo before i even set my foot in the door! At the spiritual level, I know that having children is considered a covenant. But the truth is, I've never really wanted children of my own. I like kids and come from a very loving and supportive family, but I've never in my life felt that it was something I wanted to do, or that my life has been unfulfilled without kids. Given that I'm on the edge of being too old, and that it would be physically very risky to have kids at this point, I think most people would assume that I can't have them, and I might not be questioned too closely, but if I were younger, how would my choice be viewed by church leadership? Thanks in advance for any advice!

Asking a question here -- apologies if I'm putting it in the wrong place in the forum. Here's my situation... My fiancé converted to LDS in his 20's, but left the church at the request of his ex-wife (she wouldn't even consider visiting). He would like to become active again. I was raised Methodist, but haven't attended church in a while. I guess you could say my religion has been something just between me and God -- I miss being involved in a church community, but the main thing that drove me away was that so many people were judgmental about anyone different from them. My fiancé and I are planning to visit our local ward , but aall of the reading I've done online (on both pro and anti-mormon sites), I've got a big question that concerns me on two levels. I'm in my early 40s and have never been married, no kids. While I love my soon-to-be stepdaughter, who spends every other weekend with us, we do not plan to have children of our own. The LDS seems very family-centric, and as children aren't really a part of our daily lives, I'm wondering if there is a comfortable place for me within the church? At the personal level, I wonder if I will "fit in," especially with women in the church. Are the lessons an activities for women (relief society, etc) geared mostly around children and families? Am I going to feel like the odd person out at every event? I posed a similar question to the chat representative on Mormon.org a few days ago, and her answer bothered me a lot -- she said that she knew women in their 40s in the church who "weren't even married,", but that they were spiritually fulfilled because the Heavenly Father loves them and they were happy even though they "aren't like other people." Yikes! way to make me afraid I'll be seen as a weirdo before i even set my foot in the door! At the spiritual level, I know that having children is considered a covenant. But the truth is, I've never really wanted children of my own. I like kids and come from a very loving and supportive family, but I've never in my life felt that it was something I wanted to do, or that my life has been unfulfilled without kids. Given that I'm on the edge of being too old, and that it would be physically very risky to have kids at this point, I think most people would assume that I can't have them, and I might not be questioned too closely, but if I were younger, how would my choice be viewed by church leadership? Thanks in advance for any advice!

Hello, my name is Stephanie. My fiancé is inactive in LDS, but would like to become active again, and he wants me to see what I think about the Church. I was raised Methodist, but haven't been a regular church-goer in a long time, so this is all very new to me!