idahodad

I have to admit that I am encouraged by all the replies that I got. When this all started happening a former bishop of mine asked me what I was going to do if this "went the distance"? He asked if I was going to draw closer to the lord or move away like so many do in situations like this. I'm grateful that he asked me that because it made me stop and think. This trial in my life as caused me to become so much closer to the lord than just about any time in my life before. It's driven me to become very active in the church. I've begun to go to the temple on a regular basis. And above all, I'm learning to become the dad I always wanted to be. I've opened my eyes to what is truly important in this life. Anyways I'm hoping to meet someone who has a true testomony of this gospel. Someone who will honor the covenants made in the temple. I've kind of made myself a list of things that I'm looking for and church is #1 on that list. I haven't done much looking because right now I'm mainly focusing on my kids and trying to get life back to a semi normal state. I've only been to a couple of activities, and they were quite interesting. I haven't been on any dates, and truthfully I cant wait to have someone that I can consider as my "girlfriend"! And after today I want someone even more. Because my little sister came over to my house to spend the night tonight. And we've spent most of the evening talking about her "Man"! As a matter of a fact as I write this it's 11:25pm and she's on the phone in the other room talking to him. And it looks as if they are extremely serious. His father was my bishop when I left for my mission. So needless to say I have the utmost respect for his family. So after talking to her and hearing how excited she is, it's made me realize how much I miss having someone special to spend time with. Sunday my bishop called me into his office and asked me if I was ready for a calling. I told him I would love to take any calling he gave me. He said he doesn't have anything for me yet, but he's thinking that I would be a good person to take over the wards single adult representive calling. Seeing as she just got married! I guess that would kind of put me out there on the "market" because I would have to go to most of the activities. I thank you all for your replies and positive comments! And if any of you know of any single lds ladies in the Boise, Idaho area, well send me a message!

As for having more kids, well before I got divorced I had pretty much decided that I was done. But now I think that when I get remarried I will probably want to have more with my new wife. But I don't know. I guess I am up for the possibility. As for dating an 18 year old... well my little sister is 20 and dating someone her age just seems.. well seems kind of young. But then again her boyfriend is 25 so who knows!

Unfortunately I find myself in that age group that fits into that empty space that lies between singles groups in the church. I'm 33 and with 3 kids I don't really fit in with the 18-31 group because most of them have never been married and have no kids. And most of those in the 31 to infinity group are closer to infinity than they are to my age. I guess that takes the pressure off of me when I go to singles activities in the church. It's kind of like dancing with my mother most of the time! I've only been to a couple of activites but I usually find myself to be the youngest one there. In my area they don't have a single adult ward so really the only choice is to go to the dances every Monday, Wednesday, some Thursdays, and Fridays. Oh and those on Saturdays too. And I forgot the dance lessons on Tuesdays! I think that pretty much covers all of the singles activities in my area. Not being much of a dancer that kind of leaves me on my own! I admit the one good thing about being divorced is that it has made my testimony grow so much recently. It's allowed me to open my eyes and see my kids for who they really are. It's allowed me to want and try to become the father that I always wanted to be. I feel like I've grown so much recently. It makes me so glad that I am a member of this church. It is funny how people at church seem to avoid me now. I think it's because they don't know what to say for fear of making me feel bad, or hurting my feelings somehow. I just hope that in the future I will find someone who will love my kids as much as I do. And I hope to love her children as much as I do my own.

Ok so here's my question. I recently found myself single after almost 11 years of marriage. We were both return missionaries, and sealed in the temple. One day out of the blue she told me she wanted a divorce and within weeks she moved out and in with her boyfriend. She stopped wearing her garments, handed her recomend back to the bishop and said she didn't want to be a member anymore. She left me with full custody of my 3 kids (10, 8, and 6) and barely sees them anymore. So now as a single dad I wonder how I'm going to be seen by women in the church. Are they going to avoid me because of my kids? I've gone to a few singles firesides but that's about it. I just worry that when they find out I have full custody of my kids they will run! Anybody with any experience like this? Any advice would be greatly appreciated.